sftw4221

[sftw4221]

here we go again!

April 1st. Here we are again.... WELL. All I can say for the past year is damn LOL.

A Year flew by. One of the worst years yet.

We got COVID in September. I had to postpone my bridal shower a month due to me having covid. I had to have a minor surgery bc I had a mass on my uterus.

We decided to officially postpone our wedding 6 months - we moved it to July 30th.Tomorrow would have been our wedding day. Normally, I would be hysterical crying. But, I guess because weddings don’t look like they should yet, Im not as upset (and maybe because we’re leaving for Miami in a few hours haha). I’m not sure weddings will look normal in July, but were gonna give it our best shot!

Last month, I found out I have a small brain tumor. I was losing my hearing and having daily headaches. Its small and does not need to be removed yet, but we have to watch it every six months until that point comes. 

I have been thrown so many curveballs the past year, and to be honest it changed me for the better. 

As for weight loss... that has been a journey in of itself. I lost weight, gained it back, lost it, gained it back, lost it again, gained it back.

Right now I’m sitting at about 205 give or take. NOT happy with that at all.

I was down to 193 while I was doing 9WCF. I gained  ALOT of muscle from that program so I’m trying to take that into consideration too but Its time to crack down.

4 months until our wedding. We have some work to do. Both Billy & I! 

I need to set goals it helped SO much last year so heres a rough estimate.

We are starting Monday (I will update my starting weight since were going to Miami and who the hell knows how much I will gain) But lets use 205 for now. We are going to give this 75 day hard a little remix and try it out. 80 days - diet & atleast 1 hour of work out a day. Im giving keto another shot!

4/5 -205

My goal for after the 80 days:

182. I know thats going to be hard but it is doable 

My ultimate goal for the wedding is 170. I know that is higher than my wedding goal has always been but it feels attainable and I think I would be comfortable at that weight. I havent been that weight in YEARS and it is motivation.

Short term goals

5/5 - 192

I will add more as I go and as events pop up. Lets do the damn thing!

[sftw4221]

09.25.2020

I’m back to my lowest since starting this journey!!

Yesterday I weighed 190.2!!

I am officially down 32.6 lbs

I wanted to compare my stats from my scale from then and now

My BMI was 40.0 ..................... 34.1

Body fat: 50.7% ........................41.7%

Fat-free body weight: 107.0 ................108.0 lbs

Subcutaneous Fat: 43.5% ..................36.1%

Visceral Fat: 21...............................16

Body Water: 33.8%......................40%

Skeletal Muscle: 28.7%..........................34%

Muscle Mass: 100.6 lbs.........................101.6

Bone Mass: 6.4.............6.4

Metabolic Age: 34..........35

I’m pretty happy right now. My body has changed so much. I’m going to post two pictures after this. (I forgot last time)

Day 12/21 - more than half way through!

[sftw4221]

09.23.2020

Well, I’m getting better at posting on here every couple days.. hopefully I can stick to that haha

Yesterday was Day 9 of 21 day fix.. its flying by and I’m kinda sad? lol

I am seriously enjoying this workout and I cant tell you the last time I stuck to something and worked out EVERY day.

I have been feeling so much better and leaner lately that I decided I wanted to do my measurements yesterday.. Some places lost 1/4 inch or gained 1/4 inch but my belly/hips where I have been noticing changes, I lost like an inch or more!

Soooo motivating and thank god because the scale is not doing much moving.

Yesterday I was 187.8 - normally I would be upset its barely moving / moving so slow but I’m okay with it. I’m still losing & I know I’m turning some of the fat into muscle and you know, muscle weighs more than fat. 

My back feels different. My stomach feels flatter. I lost the roll I always have at the top of my stomach right under my chest. My hips feel leaner, my thighs feel smaller and toned. I am seriously on my way to being happier.

It feels like I can stick with this. Maybe I will get sick of 21DF but maybe I wont. Maybe in the winter when I’m working crazy hours I will look forward to coming home and doing a familiar program.

After this I am going to give 21DF Extreme a try. I am going to do it for the full 21 days, even if every move is modified. I am noticing I can push myself more and everything is a bit easier. Im more flexible and I dont feel “weighed” down when trying to do some of the moves.

Day 10 later today - upper fix! I loved the upper and lower fix! 

18 days til my shower! I dont think I’m reaching that goal of 179 but thats okay, I probably would have been close without all this new muscle!

Heres to hoping!

[sftw4221]

9.21.2020

lets start off by saying.... MY WEDDING DRESS FUCKING FIT.

as a matter of fact.. it was a little big!!!

I am feeling great after 1 week of 21 day fix. Only one week and I feel stronger, leaner, more flexible.. I did not miss 1 day! Even when demoing my grandmas bathroom which was a work out in itself.. I still squeezed in dirty 30 before hand!

I was 190.4 last week before I started. Yesterday I was 188.4! So 2 lbs loss for the week.. I’ll take it since I knowwww I added on a lot of muscle. 

I compared two pics from before and after this first week and I honestly couldnt believe the difference. 

UPDATED GOALS:

9.20.2020 - FIT IN MY WEDDING DRESS!  ✓

Bridal Shower 10.11.2020 - 179 lbs.

November 1st: 175lbs

Lets see how week 2 treats me!

[sftw4221]

09.16.2020

Keep the motivation going!! 

(my posts will be in the mornings, and always summing up the day before)

Yesterday was Day 2 of 21DF. Upper fix! I thoroughly enjoyed it to be honest! It was almost easy.. 

I’m feeling good.. sore but the good kind of sore! Feeling a bit leaner every day.

As of last night/this morning, I’ve been at a stand still at 190. It’ll move, im sure its just from the muscle gain!

I did my measurements for the first time since July 8th.. besides gaining 1/4 inch here or there, I mostly lost! which is kinda mindblowing based on the month and a half of ralphs and being off keto.

I cant decided if I should measure every week or after the 21DF. I guess I will see if the scale moves.. if not, I may need that NSV.

Heres to sticking to something for once... fingers crossed!! 

[sftw4221]

09.15.2020

Woah, A lot of time has passed. My last entry was the 2nd week of July.

Just a bit of a recap; I got down to 185.6 for my birthday/engagement shoot. I wasn’t 100% happy with myself for the shoot but I did feel better than I did in the past.

Between our birthdays, bbqs, etc.. we fell off the wagon. There were times I have still ate keto, still fasted.. I think its what saved me from gaining a lottt back.

My highest was 194 again.. Yesterday I was 189.8. I’m not mad.. I enjoyed myself this summer & lived life but its time to be strict and hold myself accountable.

My bridal shower is in less than a month. I cant get anything to fit me well.. I thought I would be feeling SO much better by this point, and I would have if I didnt fuck up. My original goal was 170 lbs for my shower.. that is NOT happening lol MAYBE 179.. but even that is pushing it but I’m gonna try!

Yesterday I started back on keto and I started day one of 21 day fix. The way I worked it out, I should be finishing the weekend of my shower! Day 1 yesterday was hardddd. I had to keep pausing it. I have never really worked out like this, while on keto either though. So i kinda was feeling like shitttt. I am determined to stick to it, even if I am modifying every single move. 

I am going to do some pictures tonight and some measurements. It’ll be interesting to see how it looks compared to my before pictures / measurements.

I am trying on my wedding dress on Sunday! EEEEK, I am SCARED. I was about 10 lbs higher when I ordered but I ordered a size smaller. I am not going to freak out if it doesn’t fit.. That will be the incentive of a lifetime!! (nonetheless stressful as helllll lol)

I am still down 28 lbs and I cannottt discredit that!

UPDATED GOALS:

9.20.2020 - FIT IN MY WEDDING DRESS!

Bridal Shower 10.11.2020 - 179 lbs.

November 1st: 175lbs

Still staying hopeful that I could be in the 150s for the wedding!

[sftw4221]

7.10.20

I fixed my mistakes this week. I feel SO much better!! I have been on keto for 74 days. My goal last year was to stay on it for 90 days but I never made it. I can tell you I am DEFINITELY making it to 90 and LONG after that!

I started incorporating arm workouts everyday. Nothing too intense, usually 10-15 mins and I am definitely noticing a difference already!

I was playing around with a recipe the other day and STRUCK GOLD! Billy & I are obsesssssed! We turned a low carb mission wrap into a personal pizza and its to DIE for!

As of yesterday, I was 189.8!!! I know it’s only .2 down from my 190.0 before the fuck up but as of Monday night.. I was 196 so I will definitelyyyy chalk this week up as a win.

GOALS:

• 5.27.20 - 202 lbs  ✓

•  No date - Onederland!  ✓

• 6.8.2020 - Down 20 lbs in 6 weeks ✗ - short a few days!

• 6.18.2020 - 195 lbs ✓

• 7.1.2020 - 192.8 (25 lbs down)  ✓

• 7.5.2020 - 190 lbs  ✗

• 7.17.2020 - 185 lbs - This is NOT happening now. (.... could be possible but tough)

• 10.2.2020 - 170 lbs - This is still a possibility but I need to straighten my shit out!

• 10.11.2020 - 167 lbs (my bridal shower!)

Non-Scale Goals:

• Comfortable during shoot & happy with pictures

• Fit in my wedding dress when it arrives

[sftw4221]

7.7.2020

I fucked up.

Not just once. Two weekends in a row.

I got down to 190.0 on July 4th - for the record but I don’t even want to count that goal as achieved.

Two weekends ago, I had THREE cauliflower pizzas. Not horrible in moderation but horrible 3 days in a row. I was stressed, and had a chaotic weekend but it was no excuse.

Right before that night I had the first one, I was 190.8 and I was so happy. I then was like 192-193 and I spent the entire week beating myself up over it. This weekend came and I was like 191. We had a huge 4th of july party and I was black out wasted and threw up the next morning. I was 190.0 after vomiting.

Wellllll I decided to make things WORSE than the week before and have my first full blown cheat meat. WHY!? I DONT FUCKING KNOW.

I had chicken parm, spaghetti and THREE SLICES OF BREAD.

I am now teetering the 195-196 range and fucking hate myself to be completely honest.

I do not want to let this kick me off the wagon but it is the most defeated I have felt since being on keto. I have my birthday coming up & Billys. He wants to indulge but honestly, I can’t let myself. 

I know this is water weight. I KNOW THIS. I know I did not gain 5-6 of FAT over night but its soooo frustrating. 

Even at this weight im still down over 20 lbs. I feel so much better but I had GOALS and I fucked everything up & I am so upset.

I hope I can look back at this post in a few weeks/months and laugh how I overcame this but right now.. its a huge set back.

NOT THAT I EVEN WANT TO TOUCH THESE GOALS WITH A 10 FT POLE...I NEED TO REVISIT EVERYTHING.

GOALS:

• 5.27.20 - 202 lbs  ✓

•  No date - Onederland!  ✓

• 6.8.2020 - Down 20 lbs in 6 weeks ✗ - short a few days!

• 6.18.2020 - 195 lbs ✓

• 7.1.2020 - 192.8 (25 lbs down)  ✓

• 7.5.2020 - 190 lbs  ✗

• 7.17.2020 - 185 lbs - This is NOT happening now.

• 10.2.2020 - 170 lbs - This is still a possibility but I need to straighten my shit out!

• 10.11.2020 - 167 lbs (my bridal shower!)

Non-Scale Goals:

• Comfortable during shoot & happy with pictures

• Fit in my wedding dress when it arrives

[sftw4221]

06.26.2020

I am crushing goals right now!!! 

This has been a great week for weight loss.. but I have been extremely stressed and skipping meals. Not the best but oh well, its life sometimes.

This weekend is Steph’s baby shower & I have been running around after work, as well as some wedding stuff. 

Last time I wrote on here was about a week ago and I was weighing 195.8

Yesterday I was 191.8! I was honestly really starting to think my goals were unattainable for a little while. I am now realizing how consistent the weight loss can be when I am consistent.

So I was able to cross off a goal this week, and a few days EARLY!! One goal was 192.8 (25 lbs down) by July 1st. I am 26 lbs down as of yesterday!! So exciting and motivating!

I feel so much better about myself. Not 100% but soooo much better than borderline depression.

Time is flying by and thank god the weight is coming off too as important things are coming up and quickly!

GOALS:

• 5.27.20 - 202 lbs  ✓

•  No date - Onederland!  ✓

• 6.8.2020 - Down 20 lbs in 6 weeks ✗ - short a few days!

• 6.18.2020 - 195 lbs ✓

• 7.1.2020 - 192.8 (25 lbs down)  ✓

• 7.5.2020 - 190 lbs

• 7.17.2020 - 185 lbs

• 10.2.2020 - 170 lbs

• 10.11.2020 - 167 lbs (my bridal shower!)

Non-Scale Goals:

• Comfortable during shoot & happy with pictures

• Fit in my wedding dress when it arrives

I’m sure I’ll remember or think of more after :) So far so good and cant wait to keep progressing!

[sftw4221]

6.18.2020

Guess what! Today is June 18th - one of my biggest goal markers & ..... I did it!

Weighed in yesterday at 195.8 :) - I’ll take it! 

This goal was important to me because I felt so “off the wagon” but now I’m RIGHT where I was when I first started keto the first time. A month later I was feeling SO confident and so much better and I gave up about a month after that.

That is NOT happening this time. I could be discouraged that it took me two months to get to this point and I could have been spending 2 months from 195 but thats not how I’m looking at it.

I am down 22 lbs! In just 7.5 weeks! I am so motivated and I don’t want to stop any time soon. 

Progress has definitely slowed down but my motivation has not.

I definitely want to start adding in working out a bit more but for now, while I’m this busy - its gonna have to wait haha.

GOALS:

• 5.27.20 - 202 lbs  ✓

•  No date - Onederland!  ✓

• 6.8.2020 - Down 20 lbs in 6 weeks ✗ - short a few days!

• 6.18.2020 - 195 lbs ✓

• First Week of July - 190 lbs

• 7.17.2020 - 185 lbs

• 10.2.202 - 170 lbs

Lets see how I can do!!! 

[sftw4221]

6.12.2020

As of yesterday... I’m down 20 lbs! - 6 1/2 weeks! 217.6 Yesterday! (20.2 lbs lost but whos counting ;) )

I had a goal written in my SFTW journal book at home to be down 20 lbs in 6 weeks.. was a couple days short but I’ll take it!

Billys been doing better too. Hes down 17 lbs in 5 1/2 weeks! (he started a week after me!)

Ive been feeling great and honestly, NO cravings. My birthday is almost a month away and Billy wants us to “cheat” for my birthday but I know how that goes. One day turns into two nights which becomes the whole weekend and then I spend a week feeling like shit and I give up. I CANNOT do that this time. It honestly makes me want to not cheat at all.

I’m a little less than a week from my June 18th goal of 195. To be honest, I don’t think I’ll make it but I’ll be close which is good enough. Going to try my best though!!

I would loveeeee to be like 180-185 by my shoot but even that seems like a stretch now.. it’s coming off slower and slower I feel. But I’m not giving up. I dont care if I lose a pound a month (which, I know it would be more than that!) By the wedding I’d still be down 9 more pounds which is SOMETHING!

I truly feel like I can stay on keto for awhile. It has been SO much easier. We’re finding a rhythm, the both of us, and its just working and seems so much more sustainable. I really would LOVE to stay on it for a whole year and see where it gets me. I ofcourse will cheat from time to time if I stay on it that long but I really think I could at this point.

So, to wrap up - heres the next couple short term goals:

06.18.20 - 195 lbs

First week of July - 190 lbs

07.17.20 - 185 lbs

Throwing a random semi-long term goal out there:

October 2nd, 2020 - 6 months before the wedding -

Ideally I’d like to be 170 lbs and still losing!

[sftw4221]

06.05.2020

Happy June!! Been meaning to do an update sooner than this but oh well!!

I hit ONDERLAND again! :) After seeing a 2 in front of my weight for so long now, it’s been depressing and I am excited to finally be where I used to start from. Sometimes it can be discouraging. I feel so much better but other times I’m like, wow I’m still huge. It’s a work in progress though, what else can I say.

Yesterday I saw 199.2 and I was ecstatic. Alittle while later, 198.8! It’s motivating to say the least but I’m definitely weighing myself too much and becoming obsessed. 

I started a 30 day yoga series on youtube and did day 6 yesterday! I doubled up yesterday because I didn’t do it Wednesday because I was getting my INVISALIGN ON! :D

Speaking of invisalign.. I am interested to see if this aids in weight loss. I have to take out my trays, soak them and brush them every time I eat, as well as floss, brush and rinse my teeth after. Needless to say, snacking is no longer a viable option unless I’m starving. But it may turn out to help me in the long run.

I am official down 19 lbs as of yesterday. Its been 5 1/2 weeks. I think thats pretty great progress but I know that I had a lot to lose. 

I need to lose another 3-4 lbs to hit my June 18th goal! I have just under 2 weeks to do so and I think I can do it!

[sftw4221]

[sftw4221]

05.28.2020

Yesterday was a month on keto!!! and guess what!! I hit my goal!

I wrote last time I wanted to be 202 by the 27th and last night I weighed in at 201.2!

So 30 days on keto & I’m down a total of 16 lbs! I honestly couldn’t be happier with my results. I wish I was able to stick to it this well before my weight got this high but I’m here now and I KNOW I can do it!!

My next short term goal is to be 195 by June 18th. If I can do that, I will be closer to my goal for our engagement shoot!

I started keto the first time at 195 on June 18th and I felt SO good by my birthday that is really my goal right now, short term!

Heres to month 2 of keto!! :)

[sftw4221]

05.23.2020

Happy Saturday!!! I thought I was having an off week when it came to weight loss. Honestly, it was me.. too many “this will be ok” small handfuls of pretzels. I was fluctuating up 2 lbs and had to nip that in the butt! 2-3 days of cutting that out and I’m seeing the scale go down again. I have to say that’s the only good part about weighing everyday. I know one day when the progress REALLY slows, I will have to stop that but for now it keeps me accountable and makes me realize if I’m doing something wrong.

I got down to 204.6 last weekend, then one day I saw 204.4 but I was fluctuating all the way up to 206 and that was getting frustrating. Yesterday I ate right, actually was REALLY full at lunch, did a HUGE instacart and worked my ass off with the heaviest cart EVER! I was drenched..

I came home, was able to go to the bathroom which is not regular lately.. so I jumped on the scale before my shower. Before I hopped on, I thought to myself “please just be 204 flat” I looked down and ... 203.0! I was ecstatic! They claim you have a “swoosh” and I feel like thats whats going on for me.. I stay stagnant at a 2 lb fluctuation then bam! I’m not hating it!!!

We booked our engagement shoot for July 17th (my birthday!) with our photographer in Brooklyn! We’re so excited but need to focus and stay diligent. We have both been doing so good. Billy has lost just as much as me with one less week. He’s been on for 3 weeks on Monday and I will be 4 weeks on monday. Sometimes I feel like its coming off “slow”, ridiculous, I know.. In the almost 4 weeks, I’ve lost 14.8 lbs. I would love to lose those last .2 for 1 month which is Wednesday!

At this rate, I will unfortunately probably only be in the high 80s by our engagement shoot, but ANYTHING is better than what we were!! Here’s to hoping and a new GOAL.

Overall Goal: 150/155 LBS by April 2nd, 2021

Short term goal: 202 LBS by 5/27/2020 (one month)

Interim Goal: 180-185 by July 17th

[sftw4221]

05.18.2020

I want to stay on top of this, I swear I do but here I am posting every 2 weeks lol.

Anyway, I’m happy with my progress so far. May has been great and definitely seeing and feeling the weight coming off.

I don’t know if it’s the fact that everything is closed thanks to the corona virus that is making keto easier than I remember, or maybe I just forgot. Once you get the hang of it and cook and prepare meals, I swear its SO MUCH EASIER. 

The last time I wrote on here, I was 208.6. Yesterday I was 204.6 so 4 lbs in alittle less than 2 weeks. I’ll take it! 

My short term goal right now is to be 199 again! I’m done seeing these 200′s!

I’m hoping I can do it by June 1st but it might be close! June 18th is when I started keto for the first time 2 years ago and I felt AMAZING by July (my birthday)

When I started keto last time I was 193-195 lbs. I would LOVE to be that by June 18th. 

I’ve been on keto for just over 3 weeks and I am down a total of 13 lbs so far! and a TON of inches.

I’m going to do my measurements again today. Last time it was great to see the difference.

I have not been doing too much exercise. Last week I only rode my bike once because I have been busy but I have been moving around alot so hopefully it helps rather than sitting home!

[sftw4221]

05.05.2020

I should be posting on here more than I am. I want to get in the habit of doing so. The last time I posted, I was in the middle of doing 30 day shred and calorie counting. It wasn’t working for me. I don’t know what it is. It could be mental, it could be science but it doesn’t work for me when I’m this heavy. Everything hurt and the weight was coming off SO SLOW.. I know that’s a good thing but I don’t think so when I’m THIS big and have THIS much excess weight.

By the third week of April, I had gained back the 4 lbs I lost the first two weeks. I decided I wanted to give keto a try again. My plan is not to be on keto long term. I want to get to an appropriate weight like 175-180 and start regularly exercising/calorie counting/portion control to slowly tone and get the last 20-30 lbs off. 

I have been on keto for just over a week now and have lost about 9 lbs. I FEEL better. Feel less bloated. My back fat is not suffocating me anymore.

I have been riding my bike too. A couple times a week but I don’t want to make it a chore. Right now I’m enjoying it and I don’t want to make it a “workout routine”.

I’m going to do my measurements today again. I did them two weeks ago after I finished level one of 30 day shred, I had lost inches everywhere but my belly, I gained there! I am hoping to see improvement there this time since I feel it has gone down a bit.

I cant wait to be comfortable again, although I wonder if I ever truly will be.

We booked our Honeymoon last night.. 339 days to go.. if thats not incentive nothing is!