sheesdeeaadinside

[sheesdeeaadinside]

I need peace in my life and your don’t bring me that. I’m going through to much and as much as you say you know what I’m going through you don’t. Last I remember your sister was letting you showers and eat and giving you money when you ask. So no you don’t know. Instead of being the peace I need you cause more hurt and damage every day is something and I can’t handle you and what I’m going through at the same time. It’s to unbearable.

[sheesdeeaadinside]

Whose going to give you flowers, who took my place in your heart and giving you love. I was trapped in time, I can’t forget what we had. I wish for your happiness, I just want you to know that I’m still alone. I can’t forget you and I’m going crazy.

[sheesdeeaadinside]

I hate when you say I have a boyfriend when I don’t. Just because this one guy was telling me “ oh come move in with me” doesn’t make them my man or bf like I stayed claiming you while all you did was push me to the side and say that your moving out or that we aren’t together or that your not buying a house with me because we aren’t going to live together. But me I stayed making plans with you, I stayed period! Why ? Because that’s what your supposed to do be there no matter what or how hard it gets but you what did you do? Oh bloke me on everything and tell me hurtful things or make side comments that is intended to hurt my feeling or make me feel less than. So tell me what your doing here because I am 100% lost now.

[sheesdeeaadinside]

Im currently going through a lot, like I’m really trying. What am I supposed to think? We haven’t slept and I don’t mean like have sex I mean like lay down on the same bed and fall asleep in each other’s arms in weeks ever since you got that bed. You straight up tell me to my face any chance you could multiple times a day in fact, how we aren’t together, we aren’t living together, you even said and I quote “ I’m not having kids with you” don’t even get me started with some of the most hurtful messages that you left me on my phone just the other night. So how am I cheating if you stopped claiming me way before you even told me that you officially called it off and I asked if that’s what your doing and you said yes. Like I’ve cried and I’ve felt the hurt and not once have I been mean to you (unless I’m frustrated, but that’s to be understanding considering the fact that I’m frustrated) I love you ❤️ and I always will no matter what mistakes you have made and I have a fair share of mine but It hurts how you play with my head. :( I just don’t understand what you want from me 😪

[sheesdeeaadinside]

It’s so ducked up how on my birthday I did door dash from 8 am till late at night and because it’s your birthday you get to enjoy it like your selfish is showing. This year for my birthday I’m going to edc I don’t care what anyone says !

[sheesdeeaadinside]

I’m just so tiered. My body and mind is just over it all rn :(

[sheesdeeaadinside]

I’m truly not ok. I literally just want to sleep my days away....

[sheesdeeaadinside]

When I feel something or someone is off and acting weird I’m never wrong 😑

[sheesdeeaadinside]

It’s crazy how I know when somethings fishy so when I find out it low key doesn’t surprise me. It makes me want to distance my self more and more🤷🏻‍♀️

[sheesdeeaadinside]

Someone that deletes a whole page of chats is because they are hiding something, and the way that snap works is you can’t delete a thread of messages. You have to delete everyone’s to get ride of a certain chat with someone they don’t want to be caught messaging.

[sheesdeeaadinside]

Lo que me caga es que me mienten en mi cara.

[sheesdeeaadinside]

It’s so sad but at the same time numbing my feeling to know that when I talk and sing to you, you don’t pay attention or listen but the minute my friends mention the song or whatever your into it.

[sheesdeeaadinside]

How do you get used to sleeping without him, cause I can’t

[sheesdeeaadinside]

This is so hard for me. 😔

[sheesdeeaadinside]

I keep finding out more things and I’m not even looking 🤷🏻‍♀️

[sheesdeeaadinside]

He knew what to say to get me back on my boss bitch bad bitch fest! I would always do the same for him. I miss my old self!

[sheesdeeaadinside]

I haven’t wrote on here in a while, just didn’t feel safe to. Lately there’s no one I trust to open up too, but my depression is so bad like I can’t control it. I just want to take this away. I miss my best friend, man when ever either on of us were having what we called devil downers , We would go bump cars at the bumper car place I don’t know what it’s called. Anyways then we would get shit faced! Man the hang overs we would have! Ugh I just want to take this pain away