shentm

[shentm]

finals week! and gambling week! kill me! but wait until after april 30 3pm pst to do it i need to gamble my 300+ pulls on the 2 scholars

also been going back and thinking about jingren again specifically outsider and i just thought of the phrase chronological collapse and sure it might be inspired a little by phigros but i think it could make sense in this context

like time is so repetitive that the structure itself is what causes the downfall kind of thing

[shentm]

ratio rerun Soon

admittedly over the past few updates i've lost a lot of passion for this game both due to real life and because of the constant doomposting that i see across international and chinese social media where everyone's going "omg powercreep this game is dying before our very eyes" and it really has been exhausting

however, in celebration of ratio's first ever rerun, i'm going to put a little more effort in, also because anaxa is running at the same time and i also want him (they're both dramatic scholars)

happy rerun confirmation, dr. ratio!

[shentm]

from this post on xhs. (post title: 找cos卖腐搭子发现是同事，周末亲也亲了抱也抱了，现在上班我该怎么面对她啊)

miles edgeworth doesn't realize that the steel samurai convention isn't as large as he thinks before he's already face-to-face with phoenix wright, breath dusting over his cheek as phoenix leans in to whisper into his ear, a hand still holding his jaw firmly in place.

kiss him back, you fool, is the first comment that scrolls across the blank screen displaying in his mind, in a voice that sounds eerily familiar. how am i going to stand in court tomorrow? registers after, but with a heavy pause between the two thoughts, during which time phoenix has already pulled away.

phoenix wright. the man who he's tried to chase for the past seven years. has just kissed him, miles edgeworth, the most emotionally unavailable man possibly existing on the face of their current planet, directly under where the mask stops covering his face. he's going to have dreams about this moment for the next decade. this moment hasn't even finished yet and he knows he's going to commit every detail to memory.

quick, where's phoenix's hand? one arm's still wrapped around his waist (he's so close), the other's brushing the edge of his mask. where are phoenix's legs? not touching him (that could be changed—). where's phoenix's head? still next to his, resting, there, wait oh no he's saying something—

"—if i misread that," phoenix says.

what, miles's mind supplies.

phoenix has begun to step away.

"hey man, sorry if i crossed a line there. i thought—"

shut up, miles thinks. unfortunately, as gifted as phoenix might be, he lacks the ability to telepathically receive miles's thoughts. he's going to have to speak out loud. oh god.

"i...no, my apologies. you did not misread the situation. it was simply a...miscalculation on my part. i forgot...that i have not been...that i am not used to touch," miles says, mentally kicking his tongue for tripping over all the syllables. these are not difficult words. he's been speaking english for at least thirty years. why has he suddenly forgotten now?

the answer to that question stares at him and says, "...oh. yeah, sorry about that. guess i should have asked, aha?"

the answer, the contradiction, scratches the back of his neck just like he does in court. when did you start to recognize his tells?

shut. up. miles punctuates these two silent words with a mental full body shake, envisioning pess after she drags her entire soaked hide all throughout the house just to shake where she knows it'll be most difficult to clean.

"no, it was...i did not dislike it, per se." that's the best he can do, in these circumstances, brain running through all the branching possibilities and not yet caught up with the present case.

phoenix, at the very least, does not seem to have recognized him as miles edgeworth, childhood best friend, coworker turned acquaintance turned companion. there's something to be said about his ignorance, at times. other times he's far too observant.

finally, after what seems like an eternity of processing, of evaluating the best course of action with the given information, miles's brain asks the very important question looming as a shadow over his train of thought.

what is phoenix doing at a steel samurai convention in a cosplay of the steel samurai?

and why, out of all the possible evil magistrates out there, did he choose this particular one?

and why, even though they had been bantering back and forth for the past few minutes, and miles had been nothing but reciprocal, did phoenix kiss him? in public? would the steel samurai really do this? is this in character? wait, if phoenix is here...

"nick!"

that is a very purple voice. belonging to a woman. whose name may or may not be ms. fey.

what has his life come to?

right. in recreating the fandom's most popular ship and interacting with the steel samurai in character, miles edgeworth, cosplaying as the evil magistrate, had just been kissed by phoenix wright, as the steel samurai, but it doesn't really count because he was still wearing the mask and phoenix doesn't even know it's him and—

"oh my god, is that mr. edgeworth?"

no. no, ms. fey, do not—

"i remember you were saying something about coming! i didn't know you did cosplay though, that's pretty cool! how did you make the cape? i've never seen a material like that! how heavy is it? you know, apparently back in college nick had a side job of making cosplay props for people, but it took me ages to convince him to try dressing up himself, and you know how you didn't make any promises about if you could show up so i had to drag nick along and—"

his cover has been blown. it is time to depart for germany. the next plane flying vaguely in the european direction leaves at six pm, and currently it is three in the afternoon, leaving enough time for him to pack up his life and disappear forever. again. except this time it'll raise significantly more questions because he'll have to delegate all of his work, resign from his very public position as chief prosecutor, release a statement on the reason why he chose to move overseas...

perhaps it is easier just to go home, drink an entire bottle of wine, and pretend that this interaction never happened.

phoenix, on the other hand, does not seem as easily deterred.

[shentm]

ghfhgf. what if i put ratio in placid plastic duck simulator.

1/17/2024 (happy birthday doctor!)

water laps constantly at the platform's edges, golden in its tint and carrying with it the last rays of a sun placed just before the semi-sheer clouds. the sun is much smaller than a regular celestial object, comparable to a glowing lamp in the sky, but it brings the equivalent warmth and light expected of a typical star.

he's not sure if time passes here. the freshwater in the pool cycles and stirs, pumps bubbling as the slide draws and refills the pool. in an eternal sunset the chair rests, gentle music lulling a sense of comfort. the ducks float about, watching ratio with their flat, inked eyes.

placid plastic ducks. maybe this is a simulation. but maybe it's just the respite he's been looking for.

send help i cannot stop thinking about gay lawyers i'm being beamed back to 2021

[shentm]

can't believe i'm getting back into ace attorney. sorry ratio i still like you but i do have to admit that the reason i liked you in the first place was because of your similarities with miles edgeworth. hold in there ratio i'll come back after my nosedive into the ace attorney fandom

[shentm]

happy new year where is my ratio rerun mihoyo ):<

he is at least in the event but i want him to show up in the quest but he's. clearly not related.

anyway with the theming of tide and seek i've been thinking about a space pirate au for aventio and i am not entirely sure how i want to set up ratio's backstory in this one but the idea has been planted, it just needs time to grow

what makes ratio so interesting to me is really just how stable he is wherever he goes, which to me implies that he is very mentally strong (which i am not) and very resilient to things that would knock most people down

but more importantly is his background, a complete blank slate as far as we know, with only enough information to assume but not enough to know for sure

there's almost nothing about ratio himself that is directly told to us, it's often presented through the lens of other characters who have had glimpses into his life, and those singular stories come together to make what he is

ahfjdkdjhf ratiooooo ): ): ): when will you return veritas ):

[shentm]

dr ratio has one single sentence in sunday's character preview and i'm already going insane i miss him ): when will you come back ratio ): ): ):

[shentm]

the high that you get from a single comment is real

[shentm]

a lot of amphoreus characters have been revealed and actually i'm pretty normal about it all, mostly because there doesn't seem to be a strong connection between ratio and the characters we have. still looking forward to the 3.x arc, but as of now i don't feel a strong desire to pull for any characters. i might just save for the next while

[shentm]

i cannot wait for literally everything i've assumed to be completely overturned in 4 days it is an exciting time that we live in and i'm glad i'm here to see it

back in june i thought it was just a fun idea and now i still think it's just a fun idea but i also now have 4k words that show how fun of an idea i think it is.

ratio. amphoreus. 3.0 and his infinitely far away rerun.

more than the new information i'm just happy i finally wrote what i wanted when i wanted for once with enough time instead of like during 2.2 when i delayed the penacony finale until the last few days of the update just to get one single scene written

it makes sense that ratio can do that. he cures ignorance and he also apparently helps a little with writer's block. thank you dr ratio

[shentm]

it is kind of wild to me being the first one under the tag amphoreus on ao3. i've never been this early to anything usually it's me walking in 5 years after the party has ended to scrape up what's left from the plates in the dead partygoers' hands

[shentm]

i've finally organized the random pieces of sentences i've scattered across my multiple notebooks into one semi coherent 4 section thing

i got this out before amphoreus's formal arrival. i mean i didn't really do anything i just collected stuff and did a good amount of copying and pasting but anyway

[shentm]

it would be really funny if in the 2.2 dream when sunday's doing his whole philosophy explanation that ratio gets so angry he's literally 气醒了

[shentm]

there's literally one week until the 2.7 livestream i need to get ratio's identity crisis solidly written i did not realize i was so low on time uh

there's likely going to be a character lineup like there was for penacony and the wardance arc and some amount of new amphoreus hints and all of my musings will likely be dashed to the ground

now is the time to start making stuff up. i am genuinely running out of time

[shentm]

I would really like to make cool art but tragically my artistic capabilities are not up to the same standard as the media I consume. in order to remedy this feeling I will continue to create absolutely nothing

[shentm]

sometimes i go into my notes and i find this great fic and i go wow i wonder where i can read more of this and then i see that there are only 500 words and i have to write the rest of it myself.

it is so unfair that everything i write happens to fit my tastes perfectly but i have to actually put effort into it ):<

[shentm]

2.6 has the researcher monkeys saying stuff like the work of geniuses you mundanites will never truly understand

like they're putting themselves on a pedestal all high and mighty like i'm following in the footsteps of a true genius you could never

but what these regular people fail to realize is that they really are just normal people who happen to be driven by their beliefs

and the crimson mechanical eye will never fall on them like it did on the primal doctor or whatever he's called in english

because these researchers are only following a path that has already been established, and they may be blindly flying down it while their warped mindsets tell them it's ok, but they'll never truly reach the heights that the geniuses can reach with only one step

as ratio says it geniuses take one step forward and mundanites spend their whole lives chasing them

and these monkey tinged people are no different, they can only wonder what lies at the end of the road already paved, they cannot stray off of it themselves

and now i'm heavily biased in favor of ratio but i think he's honestly much closer to true erudition than these followers

he at least has range and diversity. ratio may not have received nous's blessing but i am of the opinion that it's because he's too human and not because of a lack of ability or potential. in contrast these researchers can't get nous's blessing simply because they haven't travelled far enough. there's only so much you can do in the shadow of a giant.

i might come back and clean this up with the right words it's 2am i'm pretty sure that not-principal guy had a name but i don't know what it is in english and i can't be bothered to search it up right now. anyway i think ratio's flavor of erudition is my favorite though the entire dissonance between geniuses and mundanites fascinates me, i just like ratio more

2.6 is pretty good. 1.6 is still unmatched.