shiitakemushroomvodka - Tumblr blog

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

whenever i'm trying to talk myself out of buying something i don't need i always hear my old russian professor's voice echoing in my head: "WHAT??? WILL YOU DIE THE RICHEST MAN IN THE GRAVEYARD?" and then i make an unwise financial decision

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

its nothing some ibuprofen and a blunt and 5 beers and a head injury and jacking off and killing myself cant fix

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

worst shift ever + me and my line chef with a bottle of Russian vodka and shrooms <3

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

hooourgh

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

my sim card keeps disconnecting I actually can't take it anymore

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

I NEED to get on a train like right now

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

Pangaea was wasted on the dinosaurs. Imagine the railway network.

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

A gray alien has slipped and hit his head on the corner of the freezer box thing at 7/11

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

I hope my autistic child's special interest is like wine tasting or cuban cigars

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

💀🥂

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

had a dream that youtube and tiktok were being pushed out of the market by something called Ebay Videos

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

sims 4 holiday sale you beautiful temptress

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

If I had the death note I wouldn’t even care about killing people the real kicker is that you can bend their will before they die. Like who cares if I could give joe biden a heart attack BUT i could make him go up the the podium and say something like “I need a thick girl and a blunt right now or I’ll die” and then he explodes. That’s where the money is

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

if I don't eat RIGHT NOW I am going to pass away

[shiitakemushroomvodka]

BE PREPARED FOR ANY SCENARIO