shinewithalltheuntold

[shinewithalltheuntold]

Yesterday was a bad writing day. I spent a lot of time staring at a screen. Lots of Tumblr replies. Lots of Twitter (the Netflix Sandman trailer going out didn’t help). Lots of being grumpy at myself and convinced I couldn’t do it any more. The script was a mess. I was doomed. This morning I printed out what I had to fix, picked up a pen, made a few notes and started typing. It was fun and easy and straightforward. I finished it and sent it to the people who needed to see it, and just got an amazed call from our script editor saying she was laughing while crying and couldn’t work out how I’d done everything in a day.

And I hadn’t done it all in a day. All of the being miserable yesterday was necessary for it to fly today. All of the knowing it was insoluble and awful made the work today relatively easy. I had to get out of my own way, and had to read it freshly, without being attached to anything. And then I just did the notes. And to make the thing that worked today, a lot of stuff that didn’t quite work or sort of worked had to be written too. It’s always easier to fix stuff that exists.

Anyway. Yesterday = bad writing day. Today = good writing day. I thought it was worth telling people, in case there was anyone else out there who was having a bad writing day too.

[shinewithalltheuntold]

i see the younglings post things like "are you still on tumblr at 30?" and "go take care of your kids instead of reading fics"

and i just feel sad

because you have a bunch of young people who are terrified of getting older.

they think age is going to change them, into something boring, something different, something grey.

and i just want to tell them, reassure them:

you will still be the same person.

isn't it wonderful?

you will love the things you love for so many years. you will find joy in the same things, decade after decade. you will feel the same inside, through all this time.

yes, the body will change. yes there's more responsibilities, less time, even less energy.

but there's no magical age where you stop enjoying that specific story, that specific game, that specific hobby.

but you know what also comes with age?

you have less fucks to give.

[shinewithalltheuntold]

Maybe I don’t want to learn the truth. Ted, the truth will set you free. But first, it’ll piss you off.

TED LASSO → 2x07 // 2x10

[shinewithalltheuntold]

a realization that changed my life was that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with doing things “the lazy way”. Like honestly, buy frozen precooked food, have canned soup, use instant ramen, use pasta sauce out of a jar. buy the as seen on tv gadget that makes your life easier, and fold your clothes the way you want. there’s no reason to struggle and live up to other people’s standard of what qualifies as “the right way”. screw em and get by the way you need to.

[shinewithalltheuntold]

JASON SUDEIKIS MONOLOGUE — SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE October 23rd, 2021.

[shinewithalltheuntold]

possibly one of the most hilarious exchanges on doctor who 

[shinewithalltheuntold]

Hey it’s ace week and you’re local ace has something to say! I’ve been out as ace for 3 years now and it’s still a big part of my identity that I’m proud of so here’s a lil something for those who need it!

[shinewithalltheuntold]

i would die for this little boy

[shinewithalltheuntold]

PSA: dont use l33t speak in AO3 tags

[image ID: an AO3 tag that reads ‘implied suicidal thoughts’ but with exclamation marks in place of the letters i]

if you do this, congrats, you’ve totally defeated the purpose of the tagging system!

AO3 is not tiktok. it is not run by a mega-corporation that sanitizes content for advertisability and shadowbans or deletes content. it’s an ARCHIVE. 

by doing this, it means people won’t be able to exclude or include your tags. and if they use a text-to-speech reader, you’ve made it ten times harder to understand. 

this goes for tumblr too!! if you put “su!c!de tw” anybody who has “suicide tw” blacklisted will still see your post. it’s not a warning if the words aren’t able to be read or recognized by the systems.

no hate if you’ve been doing this! just fix your tags and don’t do it in the future.

[shinewithalltheuntold]

(via 1qmztam6nlv71.jpg (1284×967))

[shinewithalltheuntold]

there has never been a better concept for a christmas episode than “our heroes go to a haunted house on christmas eve and get absolutely roasted by a couple of married ghosts played by ed asner and lily tomlin”

[shinewithalltheuntold]

“Some days you just have to say “screw it, I did what I could today” and just let go of all the stuff you wanted to do. Life is too short to be angry with yourself for being human.”

[shinewithalltheuntold]

[shinewithalltheuntold]

some fucker: “If you arent paying for a product, you are the product!” 

me using tumblr costing yahoo a billion dollars: 

[shinewithalltheuntold]

[shinewithalltheuntold]

How to deal with kids (without hitting them)

1. The Best Defense is a Good Offense: Be proactive with children’s behavior.

Don’t wait until a child is in the middle of a meltdown in the toiletries aisle of Target. Try to be aware of how different situations and stimuli might affect kids of different ages. A few tips:

Kids, especially toddler age kids, struggle with transitions. Give them a clear time table and stick to it. Give them updates as deadlines approach. “We are leaving the library in 5 minutes.” “We need to go see Grandma in 10 minutes.” “Target will only take 20 minutes.”

Getting toted around by adults can be exhausting and frustrating. Give kids tasks to do. Put them in charge of something. It can be something actually helpful (you get to hold the calculator and keep track of how much money we are spending in the store) or something fun to keep their mind busy (count all the blue things in this aisle.) Talk to your kids. Help them feel involved, instead of just a tote bag.

Model self care and emotional awareness. Kids are often dealing with SUPER new emotions, and may not know how to recognize them, contextualize them, or act on them. Talk through your own emotions, or emotions you think they may be having, and show them how to deal with them. “Yeah, I know, mommy is really sad that we can’t go to the park because of the rain. It makes me feel really bad inside. I think if we color with crayons for a while, I’ll feel better.”

Give kids choices. Obviously, age plays a big part here, but a reasonable, curated set of appropriate choices gives kids a growing feeling of agency and teaches making good choices. “Would you like peas or green beans?” “Penguin Shirt or Turtle Shirt?” “Water or apple juice?” This requires YOU to also speak with and listen to the kids. Always important.

Consistency is very important. Make sure your rules are clear, the reasons are clear, and the consequences are clear BEFOREHAND. Kids really can’t just infer rules out of thin air. They need to be taught the expectations, and then YOU need to keep to them.

Be aware of how the children in YOUR care react to things, and find ways to mitigate “bad” behavior before it happens.

2. “Punishment” is not the goal. Discipline means teaching.

Your goal, as a parent, as a teacher, as a baby sitter, is not to punish kids. Your goal is to help teach kids how to become thoughtful, responsible, and kind people. The entire idea of kids “deserving” bad things because they’ve “been bad” is flawed. If a kid does something “bad”, then we should aim to help them not make that bad choice again.

How?

Identify any immediate stimuli or situation causing the bad behavior and remove/alter it so the behavior stops. This might mean leaving an errand unfinished, a time out, taking away a toy, etc, in order to STOP the behavior that is happening RIGHT NOW.

Talk to the child about why their behavior was “bad.” What bad affects could it have? How does it affect others? What caused it? Kids, even very young kids, can understand complicated things if explained in terms on their level.

Come up with a plan for what to do next time the original stimuli or situation happens. If Timmy tries to take your truck again, what can we do differently? The next time we are in line at the bank, what can we do to make it more fun?

If the child is older, and the offense is more severe, you may feel the need for a tangible consequence. Remember that these should be age appropriate, reasonable, and negotiable. Give kids the ability to reduce their consequence with good behavior, and be willing to modify the consequence if they have a compelling and reasonable request. Listening to kids and being empathetic is not a weakness. It is a sign of respect.

3. Don’t forget that kids are people. Kids are also kids.

Kids will not be perfect angels. You will not be a perfect adult. Sometimes they will be cranky, angry, tired, hungry, selfish, or mean. You can be these things to. One bad day doesn’t mean you are a failure, and it doesn’t mean the kids are a failure. You have to let kids have bad days sometimes. You have to love them anyway and be willing to give it a fresh go tomorrow.

Working with kids is not easy. No one said it would be. But part of working with kids is the obligation to always be thoughtful about our interactions with them- we teach them with everything we do. So we should treat them with all the respect, kindness, thoughtfulness, and patience we want them to learn.

(Here is a clean version of this, without the discourse, slightly updated) 

[shinewithalltheuntold]

kermit the frog was so fucked up for writing the rainbow connection