shippudens

[shippudens]

can people start saying pawsome again

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they should put shock collars on all men and if they annoy a woman even for a split second unvoiced thought the collar should just keep going off until they pass out

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lol let's all get consumed by our most base, bestial instincts and do things that can never be undone. it can never be undone

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can I confess I don’t really have a life goal or a plan I’m just living each day as it comes

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dropped my wooden fish twice and said "nooo my awesome fish" each time i did

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things are funnier when you're in a good mood. **remembers i'm on the internet in 2025** And that's a form of emotional manipulation.

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call my pussy fort bragg the way active duty military personnel keep dying inside it under mysterious circumstances.

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fujoing out again in margaritaville

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me when someone who has been nice to me every single time we've interacted is nice to me:

omg... you dont hate me?....

[shippudens]

kitty cat purring gotta be in the top 1 sounds ever invented it's so awesome that there's a creature that can just be sitting and staring blankly at me but I know she's happy cause she's going brrrrrrrr

[shippudens]

pro tip: if some loser ever starts talking shit to you in a video game just type in chat "the angry gamer". 9/10 times they will respond back even more irritated and then you can hit them with "the very angry gamer" and you can just keep going with it' "the big mad gamer", "the raging gamer", "the pissing and shitting gamer" etc. its so simple but it makes them lose their shit so bad they spend the rest of the game coping in chat instead of actually playing. give it a try next time you kill some loser and they call you a pedo 👍

[shippudens]

my parents got mad at me for reading the wikipedia article on mustelids at the dinner table and the my mom said mustelid sounds like something putrid and yucky. No hope for them even a little bit

[shippudens]

Important things about the nature of reality:

Lemmings in real life do not randomly bolt to their deaths like lemmings do in cartoons. Small children randomly bolt to their deaths like lemmings in cartoons.

Piranhas in real life do not flock to pick anything to the bone in a span of seconds like piranhas do in cartoons. Domestic chickens pick anything to the bone in a span of seconds like piranhas do in cartoons.

[shippudens]

No more apologizing for being horny on main. No more horny jail. We’re horny prison abolitionists. No gods, no masters! Wait. Okay maybe a few masters. Alright but no bars will hold us! No whips and chains will — fuck, hang on, let me start again.

[shippudens]

^ for the unaware

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Be honest do you think that actually learning things in high school is important

yeah dude or else youre gonna be that coworker people post about

[shippudens]

CIA database leak reveals prompt list for marx/engels kinktober 2026