shitey

[shitey]

ol musky after today’s launch

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[shitey]

did i ever tell ppl about the time me and my family thought my older brother was gay and dating his best friend? they used to hold hands and cuddle and shit all the time and cause my brothers super quiet we kinda just thought that was him coming out and didn’t really say anything about it. this went on for maybe two yrs and then one day he arrives home with this girl and is all ‘id like you guys to meet my girlfriend’. at this point everyone is ’????’ and my mom is literally crying and like ‘u broke up with James?!?!?!’ and honestly I’ve never seen a man more confused in his life and yeah that’s the time my family fucked up for like 2 yrs

[shitey]

Everything predicted about global warming as far back as the 70’s are all happening exactly or worse than predicted and it doesn’t seem to have changed one single person’s mind about it being a hoax. We can’t even kinda marginally mitigate it (which is all we’ll ever be able to do now) it without a lot of those people on board but they’re just gonna drag everyone down with them.

[shitey]

[shitey]

[shitey]

HEY EVERYONE LOOK AT THIS NEAT INVISIBLE BOX I’M MAKING

[shitey]

[shitey]

[shitey]

a concept: i’m in a warm bed with lots of blankets and i have no obligations to be anywhere. i’m calm and safe and happy and you are here with me

[shitey]

Doctor: you have 6 months to live

me: Oh No!!!! 😜👌🏽😂👌🏽😉👌🏽💯💯🔥🔥🔥😂😂😂

Doctor: how the hell did you do that

[shitey]

[shitey]

“A nut for a jar of tuna” is the same backwards

[shitey]

Stephen Colbert and Stephen King concoct a scary story

[shitey]

Jackpot

[shitey]

[shitey]

Someone buy this man a beer

[shitey]

Fire Drills have trained us not to give a shit about fire alarms