sinnyreadstoomuch

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I have an obsession with Batfam meets the Justice League fics and headcanons in general, and my favorite situation is when the JL fully knows Nightwing, he's on the team, they all like him quite a bit, and he's so charming and open seeming that they all collectively forget that they don't know anything about him.

I want that, then on a mission, fighting a magic user of some sort, Nightwing gets zapped back to young Robin age. So everyone else on said mission is left confronted with 9 year old Dick Grayson in full Robin gear, who is fully ready to fight every single one of them, and they generally have no idea what's happening or who this child is, other than the fact that he's probably young Nightwing, except he won't answer to that name.

And Dick, extremely confused and suspicious because he doesn't know half of the people there, and the ones that he is aware of are wearing different costumes or are just straight up different people than they're supposed to be, proceeds to try and fight them, then actively try to run away.

Then they finally manage to wrangle him back to the Watchtower, trying to grapple with the implications that Nightwing has been a highly trained, costume vigilante since childhood, and managed to break a bone in Green Arrow's hand before they subdued him, and is still thrashing around and trying to bite various League members.

They call Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman in to see if they have any idea what to do with him, and when Robin sees Batman, he squirms out of Flash's grasp, runs to Batman, and climbs up his side until he's wrapped himself around his shoulders like he does it every day.

The Bat lets this happen, sighs in exasperation, then calls Zatanna to help.

The League is then left to piece together why tiny child Nightwing ran to Batman for safety, and why Batman seems a whole lot less confused than everyone else.

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I'm golden-child!Jason and not-even-a-silver-egg!Dick truther for life, and that's so funny.

Bruce is used to the chaos he calls his son, so when Jason actually behave, Bruce is soooo confused.

Like, what do you mean Bruce can tell him to not do something and Jason will??? Obey??? The order??? Dick would never.

Bruce, fully prepared for scandal: You are not allowed to jump from one wardrobe to another, it's dangerous for you.

Little Jason, who has no idea why he should: Ok? I wasn't planning to anyway.

Confused Bruce: You wasn't?

Little Jason who are scared to touch anything here, because it probably costs more than his life: I don't want to ruin the mansion...

More Confused Bruce: You don't?!

Or 

Bruce: so, you are saying that if I tell you to sit in your room and read books, you will really sit in your room and read books?

Little Jason, who has no idea why he shouldn't: Yeah?

Bruce, whispering to Alfred: I didn't know they could do that.

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Steph: Who was the best kid? Like, when you got them, who was best at, uh, being a..good kid?

Bruce, immediately: Jason.

Tim, traumatized: Let's not do this right now.

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jason: seriously grave robber —

tim: memorial case.

jason: i - hm?

tim: i robbed your memorial case, not your grave silly, you weren’t even in your grave for me to rob it!

jason: wait… did you check??

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Starting to think a cooler headcanon for Clark’s upbringing might just be that the entire town of Smallville collectively decided to just go with it and accept that Martha and John's kid has superpowers, but we don't talk about it.

Someone's tractor gets stuck and nothing can get it out? "Be a dear and run down to the Kents, would you? Ask for Clark?"

"Why Clark, we need a machine--"

"Run along now."

Or if he kicks too hard and the football vanishes into the upper stratosphere, no it didn't, we all collectively saw it land over there *vague hand movements*

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Keeping Up With The Wayne’s but bc Jason literally cannot be there, they have like a little memorial shrine and when asked about Jason, Bruce is like,

“oh my son, my wonderful wonderful dead son, he was an angel a perfect boy the best possible child ever.”

Tim just makes snide ass comments like “Well he wasn’t that great, he was actually an asshole who would always drink the last of the coffee and not make another pot like your suppos-“ and Bruce would interrupt like “hahahaha timmy here never got to meet Jason.” before gently covering Tims ears and fake whispering to the camera “He’s always been a bit jealous”

in revenge, Tim put the batman cowl in Bruce’s bedroom before he gave a tour and Bruce had to say it was Sex Thing.

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(everybody is okay)

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Psst! Maybe doodle a Bruce and young Dick spotted by paparazzi!

Heartwarming! Bruce Wayne spotted walking with young ward Dick Grayson!

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fucking love when I'm on a call with someone and they start to do a little errand or go somewhere else and they say "and you're coming with me" like. absolutely I am let's go on an adventure I've been spirited away

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The potential of stories with Tim and Damian being the only kids still living at the Manor is criminally overlooked. When you are siblings, and forced to live together, it’s physically impossible to not start hanging out. I should know, I have just one sibling and we spent a lot of time far away from other kids/friends. Who else you’re going to hang around with?

You know that thing all siblings do where they just randomly burst in to the others room and just stand at the doorway, saying nothing? Yeah that.

Damian: *slams Tim’s door open*

Tim: ????

Damian: *stares*

Tim: ????????

Damian: Drake, I demand you to entertain me.

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eveeyones got it wrong your mid 20s arent for going to the club or partying or picking up new crafts. your 20s are for discovering how much more autistic you are than you thought you were in high school

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bruce: he’s killed people

damian [who’s heard stephanie say this at least 10x a day]: but have you considered that maybe he’s just a teenage girl?

jason: yeah! have you considered that bruce?!

bruce: jason, you’re 22 and a male

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"this fandom is annoying" every fandom is annoying dipshit. it came free with being passionate about something.

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Dick: "Oh hang on, before we go out I just need to check something."

Jason, annoyed, leaning over his shoulder: "Are you hacking Blüdhaven PD? You know you can just go to work tomorrow and log in right?"

Dick: "Shut up for a second. I need to focus."

Jason: "Are you-- are you destroying evidence related to Nightwing??"

Dick, ignoring him resolutely as he finishes up.

Jason, cackling: "Oh my God, wait 'till Batman finds out you're a corrupt cop."

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This made me so sad

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Bruce: Jaylad, I need you to be at the Wayne gala this weekend.

Jason: But why me, B? Why not pretty boy, Dickie? I'm sure the ladies miss him.

Bruce: Your brother has a double shift this weekend.

Jason: How about the brat? He needs the socialization.

Bruce: Will be at the Kents' for a sleepover.

Jason: How about -

Bruce: The rest of your siblings will be busy, lad.

Jason: But Bruce, I'll be busy too. And even though I wasn't, I don't want to be around those pretentious fuck - people.

Bruce: Diana will be there.

Jason: Why didn't you start with that? Absolutely! I'll be there, old man. And I'll need a new suit.

--

at the gala

Diana: Aw, you look really handsome, little prince.

Jason blushes and smiles like the little boy who saw Wonder Woman for the first time.

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I like to imagine that when Bruce is really sick or horribly injured and doesn't want to show weakness, he just... sends Dick in his batsuit to Justice League meetings.

And nobody notices

And a few years later Dick finally ends up in the league as Nightwing and someone brings up how Batman never seems to get sick or hurt, even when they know he's taken big hits, he's always at the meetings.

And Dick just bursts out laughing and falls out of a chair.