I'm cooking up some philosophy, it's better with apples
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Girls with swords are great but there aren't enough girls with flanged maces or morning stars to go around. Give me a woman who does bludgeoning damage
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hey kids did you know that computers didn't used to automatically connect to the internet. it used to make this screaming noise. we should have listened.
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Its so sad there isnt a jorking it equivilent for food
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Reading sports headlines while pretending sports doesn't exist suggests a fascinating world of magic and whimsy.
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Due to a misspelling on my part while writing down a wish I wanted the djinni to grant me, I have been transported back in time and turned into a servant of the king of England, Denmark, and Norway
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I think this implies that if you parry properly you peg him
i let him hit cause. uh. well i’m gonna be honest it’s cause i fucked up my parry timing
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Neil Banged out his tunes today, on a train you have the comfort and relaxation to bang out your own tunes
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Good News Gamers!!
You can now play Sigmund Freud on your Nintendo 3DS handheld!

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The thing about Cottagecore is that is a fetishized aesthetic of country life, divorced from labor and idealized by a primarily urban audience with a backward looking ethos of tradition. They are not prepared for the stresses of a rural life: farming; harvesting; tapping pumpkins to ensure none of them have been replaced with flesh; losing out on income by having to use one of your pigs in a blood sacrifice to paint protective sigils over your doors and windows; checking cracks and chimneys for the flesh-vines of the Pumpkin Lord; having to decide, before the Growth is complete, whether that's really your tradwife or an amassment of vines, leaves, and blood in the shape of your tradwife; ignoring their desperate pleas that "I'm me! No! No!" as you burn them alive, realizing too late you picked wrong; and the exploitative corporate nature of commercial farming in 2024. All seen through a deeply colonial lens, of course
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Pangaea was wasted on the dinosaurs. Imagine the railway network.
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Today in niche genres of joke that I can never get enough of and will probably still be secretly thinking about four years later




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