sixthtm-a-blog

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ok so,  i’ve decided to archive this blog!  you can now find ben here.

[sixthtm-a-blog]

ok so,  i’ve decided to archive this blog!  you can now find ben here.

[sixthtm-a-blog]

ok so,  i’ve decided to archive this blog!  you can now find ben here.

[sixthtm-a-blog]

ok so,  i’ve decided to archive this blog!  you can now find ben here.

[sixthtm-a-blog]

ok so,  i’ve decided to archive this blog!  you can now find ben here.

[sixthtm-a-blog]

ok so,  i’ve decided to archive this blog!  you can now find ben here.

[sixthtm-a-blog]

seven-word sentence starter.

“please, don’t take this the wrong way.”

“know that we’ll still have each other.”

“tell me we’re doing the right thing.”

“you know what i was gonna say.”

“i don’t give a shit what happened.”

“everything is so confusing. i don’t know.”

“sorry. i didn’t mean what i said.”

“you really don’t have to keep apologising.”

“i hate knowing we have to hide.”

“it’s not your fault. don’t blame yourself.”

“this is all out of our control.”

“i think i’m going crazy without you.”

“what am i supposed to say to that?”

“we need to talk. call me.”

“i can’t sleep because of all this.”

“how much more must i be hurting?”

“i’m not the person i once was.”

“c’mon you know it’s not like that.”

“what about all of this is funny?”

“tell me you don’t feel the same.”

“you always seem to make me speechless.”

“you left me here all by myself.”

“is this all a joke to you?”

“i can still remember the good times.”

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                                               The sadness of the past is with me always.

                                               The sadness of the past is with me always.

                                               The sadness of the past is with me always.

                        indie. sel. priv. five hargreeves rp                             promo        psd         loved by jan.

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ANTIGONE   :   I’M   ALONE   ON   MY   INSIDES   /   I   DIED   LONG   AGO   /   WHO   SUFFERS   MORE   /   I   WONDER   WHO   SUFFERS   MORE   .   (   CHORUS   :   YOUR   SOUL   IS   BLOWING   APART   .   )        &         𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐬    ,    a   private   roleplay   blog   for   𝘷𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘢   𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘴   of   the   um.brella   academy   .   conducted   by   ro   .

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You ever just... yell about #violints??

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stay  up  on  the  surface,  nobody  will  know  that  you,  you're  just  as  scared  as  them.  you  don't  know  where  to  go.

selective,  private  and  independent  blog  for  ben  hagreeves  from  the  umbrella  academy.  show  and  comic  based.  written  by  sabs.  personals  don’t  reblog !

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                                    indie show based Klaus Hargreeves / by Dee   

                         YOU ALWAYS SEEM SO CAREFREE                               (I WANT TO BE NUMB AGAIN)

                                            promo credit / personals don’t reblog 

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♡ !!!!!

hug him!!! / accepting / @sixthtm

Sobriety sucks. Okay so there are some benefits-Klaus no longer lives in a permanent fog which is kind of useful, he knows what’s going on a lot more than he used to, and talking to his siblings is a lot easier without a layer of oxy between them. So, not all bad, but pretty shit all the same. Between the ghosts yelling at him with renewed force as if to make up for the years he’s spent ignoring them, and the constant cravings under his skin Klaus has been feeling absolutely miserable. On top of all he’s still wrestling with his powers, the same one’s he’s been deliberately ignoring and drowning out for almost two decades. Fun times all round in the Hargreeves home. 

He and Ben are sat crossed legged in Klaus’ bedroom, facing each other as Klaus tries in vain to make Ben physical. Part of him wants to give up, and he’s said as much several times, but he keeps going anyway. The thought of being able to touch Ben is too great a thought to have him give up now. His lip is still stinging from Ben’s punch and Klaus focuses on that, on the fact that his dead brother fucking hit him. So many times over the years Klaus has tried to high five Ben, or lean on him, or hug him, only to pass through and end up on the floor, confused and laughing and so very sad. It’s not just about him, either. Klaus might not be the smartest of his siblings, but he’s not blind or an idiot either. Being dead is hard on Ben, of course it is, for over a decade the only person he’s had to hang out with is his junkie brother. It’s surely a sign of what a good person Ben is that he hasn’t abandoned him, Klaus thinks, he’s a much better person than Klaus has ever been, and god dammit he deserves this. 

Sweat is beading on Klaus’ forehead and his hands tremble with exhaustion as well as withdrawal. They should stop, call it a night, but all he can think about is how unfair it is that Ben has been stuck like this, how ungrateful he’s been of his own life-that’s the real torture, watching your brother piss everything away. It’s not fair, and Klaus knows he can do something about it, but he’s so tired and-and suddenly his hands stop midair because they’ve hit something solid. Klaus looks in shock at his hands pressed against Ben’s, palm to palm and he can feel Ben’s hands under his. A shocked laugh falls from his lips and he opens his mouth to speak but before he has the chance he’s being almost knocked over by the force of Ben’s whole body crashing into his.

It takes a second before Klaus’ shocked brain puts the pieces together and realises that Ben is hugging him and fuck-fuck. What the hell does he say to this? Without hesitating he wraps his own arms around Ben’s solid form and clings to him with a kind of desperation. How long have they both waited for this? How long have they both needed it over the years? Watching Klaus piss away his life might have been torture for Ben, but for Klaus it’s always been this-being unable to hug his brother when they both so clearly need it. He has no idea how long he can keep this up, how long it will take before Ben fades again leaving him with nothing of armfuls of cold air, but he doesn’t care. For now it’s enough to bury his face in Ben’s shoulder, sobbing, and hug his brother as tight as he can. 

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ben : *wakes up at 3 am*  wow i love my siblings *instantly goes back to sleep*

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*  violints‌

she finished the song minutes ago now   ,   but she’s been staring at the sheet music on its stand as if it may jump from the page   &   attack her at any point   ,   unblinking   &   nervous.      ‘   i’ve been thinking   ,   ’      she starts   ,   characteristically hesitant   —      ‘   i   ,   uh   ,   d’you think i could go to college?   for music.   i don’t know   ,   it might be stupid   ,   but.   ’      she trails off   ,   words hanging in the air.   the unknown frightens her   ,   more than she could ever say   ,   &   there is nothing more unknown than the world outside these walls   ,   and thus nothing more terrifying   —   but she wants to escape   ,   wants to breathe air not clouded by the dust of this dark mansion.   (   someday   ,   her heart sings   —   there must be something beyond this   ,   and someday she will have the courage to find it.   )

   *    @sixthtm .   call .

    lazily,  he  opens  his  eyes  to  look  at  his  sister.  his  back  rests  against  the  floor,  a  pillow  thrown  to  nestle  his  head  —  he  catnaps  while  she  plays,  too  tired  to  actually  do  something  other  than  listen.  college  has  never  sounded  like  a  possibility  for  them,  the  weight  of  the  world  resting  on  their  shoulders :  but  vanya  doesn’t  have  to  worry  about  that,  and  she  is  talented.  ben  thinks  she  could  do  something  good  with  her  life  instead  of  rotting  away  at  this  house,  waiting  for  orders  that  are  never  quite  fulfilling  enough  to  justify  years  and  years  of  training.  he  wonders  if  she  knows  that,  how  good  she  actually  is,  or  if  she  wants  to  go  to  college  just  so  that  she  can  stand  out  (  and  were  she  any  other  person,  he  would  ask  —  but  he  doesn’t,  because  it’s  vanya,  and  he  would  like  to  go  to  college  too  if  he could  ).    ‘  it’s  only  a  little  bit  stupid, ’  a  good -- spirited  joke,  to  perhaps  lighten  the  mood.  he’s  never been  too  good  at  those.  ‘  you  could  —  you should.  you’re  good  at  this,  you  know? ’

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judas absolutely made peanut butter and pickle sandwiches for bens eldritch/tentacle monster and named it 'seymour' afsgfhdf

believe it or not,  giving it a name and feeding it  ‘ normal ’ food helped ben feel a lot better about having the creatures with him :  he would sit on the kitchen with judas,  all teary - eyed in what was normal ben fashion when he was younger,  and would complain endlessly about his stomach hurting until his sibling made sandwiches.  for seymour.  that always made him laugh,  and the creatures seemed to calm down anyway when judas was around,  so ben always ate,  very happily i might add,  until the monster was satisfied.  imagine a diet that consists of meat and peanut butter & pickle sandwiches.

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anyway do not refer to ben’s creatures as the horror or that will put you on ben’s list of least favorite people.  that nickname was given to him by the media / reginald,  and it’s used for him,  it’s his nickname :  this doesn’t mean he likes it,  because he wholeheartedly hates it,  but he wants to establish a line,  a difference between him and his creatures,  and using the same name for both just... doesn’t work.