sjpinkman

[sjpinkman]

The Myth of the Chimera

The lights are dim outside my closed eyelids. It was customary every morning, as I usually leave the curtains tightly closed before going to bed. What was really strange was the fact that I had to strain to open my eyes. You know when you drink the amount you would knock down an elephant but I hadn't done any of that and I wasn't even tired of my routine. After all, my routine is not the same as before, as many, many months ago. Basically bed, laptop, bed, and sometimes, kitchen. My eyes opened and the dim light didn't come from the huge window that looked out onto the balcony but from the pair of yellowed lamps that were in the right corner of my room and barely lit the room.

So it was still night. I woke up one more time at night. And don't start thinking that I have insomnia or something, the 10 hours of sleep are well covered, the problem is when you sleep at 8 a.m.. I managed to fully open my eyes despite the difficulty. I felt a little dizzy and a strong thirst. I tried to move and from that point nothing made sense anymore. Something stopped me from moving my arms. My wrists felt pain from the movement. Automatically my gaze fell on the black handcuffs that hugged my wrists tightly. Another sleep paralysis. If I tried to calm down, I would wake up to reality in a few minutes.

"So, you finally woke up."

I tried not to look in the direction of the voice, usually, in sleep paralysis, a big demon or ghost be on top of you calling, weighing you down.

"Closing your eyes won't make me disappear."

The same voice spoke. It was really close to me and I didn't want to look. That's when my bed sank a little beside me and I instinctively looked. A scream caught in my parched throat at what I saw in front of me. Even in the dim lighting the woman's outline was well defined, her hair too dark and straight. She would be a complete ghost if the sheen of the black silk robe that covered most of her body didn't reflect the light waves. It felt real.

"You're thirsty?" The woman said, looking at me.

And I was, but this was weird for sleep paralysis and the thought of it being real terrifies me more than any evil spirit. The scream returned to my throat, it didn't take long to get out.

"Who are you? This is real? I’m still dreaming, right?” The words came out with perfect pronunciation but my lips felt heavy like my eyes.

"Oh, you're not dreaming" the woman smiled devilishly. "I'm waiting for you to wake up so we can start playing."

She got up from the bed and walked towards the various switches next to the big tv that was in front of my bed. The white lights came on and my eyes burned. That situation became more and more real, my heart began to race. Who was that crazy woman in my room?! Inside my home?!

“Get out of my house, immediately” I tried to be serious and authoritative as if I wasn't afraid of it all. The biggest fear of any famous person is having their house invaded and being hurt, robbed, or killed. This has happened before with countless famous people, it was a real danger. Despite the fear, I was never found in that situation, besides I was handcuffed. Yes, in the meantime I felt the pressure on my ankles. And I knew I was immobilized, helpless.

"If you think a little bit more, you know that bossy voice won't work as much as you want, but relax, I won't do you any harm," the woman said with the TV remote in her hand pointing to the off-screen as comfortably as if that environment didn't was new to her. “I like to start by seeing something, to make you more comfortable. Do you like porn? A girly thing?”

“What?” What was happening? I really think I'm still dreaming or is someone playing a prank on me? The other members had already done this to me once and I wasn't stupid, not to have realized that it would be another moment of my life recorded, but I'm clueless this time. “Just get out of my house, you crazy!”

“I'm anything but crazy, honey” she said smiling, so openly.

“Really? Why are you talking about porn then? I don't even know you, you don't even know me! We...”

“Oh, come on, tell me. I can choose something else” the woman, who was on her back, turned to me and I could see her face from the front with the lights on for the first time. If this wasn't a dream, maybe it was a play. No, I didn't want to believe that crazy woman who broke into my house was so… beautiful. That's not convenient now, right? Someone call the police, please. She changed her carefree face to one of 'i got it'. "I already know! You like hentai, don't you? I never make mistakes.”

And she wasn't wrong, but I would never admit that out loud to anyone. And why was she talking about that? Shit. Shit. Shit.

"You're not going to say anything anyway, so..." she huffed and shrugged. “Blue pill or red pill?”

“Does my opinion matter here?” I asked, sarcastically. Even at those times, I couldn't control it. The devilish grin returned and I automatically regretted it. I'm going to take a big stab now. I closed my eyes expecting the worst.

"I'm not that monocratic. C'mon, choose."

“Red pill,” I said, remembering one of my favorite movies. Maybe if I took the right pill I would wake up from this nightmare.

“Great choice” and then I didn't know what to expect. I was getting uncomfortable not being able to move. The woman started fiddling with the apps on my television while she was talking, in the same comfortable and routine tone, it irritated me. “As we are close to starting, I have to explain a few things. First, I'm not here to hurt you, as I've said before."

The television screen went completely red, so she turned off the white lights and the redness engulfed the entire room. Red pill my ass! “Second, I apologize for drugging you a little…” She made a childish gesture with her hands to indicate a little.

"You what?" That's why I felt so dizzy waking up without having had a drink last night or the day before, I don't know. Fuck, I was really going to die. So young.

“And third, you can call me Chimera.”

Then Ch… Chimera untied the noose that held the black robe to her body and holy shit. The lingerie the same color as the robe outlined the bronze skin. With the robe on the floor, the red light illuminated her waist and hips and I knew I was no longer sane. The blood that had been running strong in my heart since I got into that bizarre situation leaked a little to a place I didn't want it to go, that I thought I could control. The last place it could go in a situation like that. I no longer knew if the craziest was me or her. I hadn't handcuffed anyone, maybe I had a score down.

Chimera approached the bed and I tried to shrink. Unsuccessfully. At least my survival instinct was still with me. She pulled the duvet that covered my bare waist down and smiled as she looked at me in just a random pair of pajama pants. I swallowed hard. Her nails started to dig through my shins over my pajamas. I didn't show any reaction, I didn't know whether to scream for help or wait for the next thing she would do to then ask for help.

“I feel you so tense, you should relax.” Her nails crept up my thighs and I felt my ears heat up. Damn! I swear I could have done something, anything to try to get out of there. I don't know. My head stopped working when I saw her breasts… And it bothered me. Well, I'm not a brat who falls for a pair of breasts. I'm a grown man! But it's indeed been a while since I've seen one this close. Oh shit, if I left the house like everyone tells me I wouldn't be letting that crazy woman touch me without me complaining… Fuck!

"I knew you'd like it," Chimera smiled after touching my hip so close to mine... "I'm dying to sit there but I really like to play with my food before I eat it."

What did she mean by that? Cannibalism in this century, please no! And that's when I felt her hand touch me where it was already relatively apparent before. Half a growl escaped my throat. What the fuck! You stupid, scream! Do something! My rational side screamed it in my consciousness, the irrational side gasped at Chimera's second touch.

“I just need to move away a little, okay?” Small hands gripped the hem of my pajama bottom which was lowered revealing something as pink as my ears and cheeks. Chimera got to her knees between my legs that were trapped in parts of my bed, who knows how. She pushed her waist-length hair to the left and lowered her face to my hip. If I saw the lingerie from the front and already lost a part of my consciousness, the way the lace panties covered her ass ended everything else.

"Seriously, if it's some kind of joke, it's gone too far, hasn't it?" I said babbling. In the cold room, with the red light, and the curves, I knew I was going to lose my lucidity and it would be pretty fast from there.

"Nobody knows I'm here" the warm air that came out of Chimera's mouth came into contact with my firm cock. The thermal shock of the cold air from the room's air conditioner made me shiver. Damn me, I lost everything.

“What are you waiting for?”

Yes, that came out angry, almost desperate, denouncing my insanity and she laughed.

"I thought you'd be harder to convince" her voice sounded sincere and before I could think of what to answer the wetness covered me and I had no choice but to moan. Chimera did it so delicately, that I could have sworn she was doing it on purpose. I ended up pushing my hips towards her mouth and she growled. Cold air enveloped me as the heat of her mouth left me.

“So hasty! I said I liked to play with my food, none of this is serious yet” she was explaining herself while her right hand went up and down slowly but with an unbreakable rhythm. Her speech didn't get in the way, I doubt anything would, actually. "Let's not get bored, as you insist."

To my misfortune, her hand left me. She shifted across the bed with her knees landing on either side of my waist. Chimera looked down at me, dark hair dancing around her body. The stranger's face came close to mine. Even though the only light source was the television, I could still clearly see the thick lips, the color of the eyes as dark as the hair, and some freckles on the bridge of the nose coming through the prominent cheeks. She was beautiful. It would definitely be someone who would make me look twice, but as always, I wouldn't do anything about it. However, she was right there on top of me, while I was literally chained under her. Our eyes met, maybe she was looking at my face as closely as I was looking at hers. The weirdest thing is that she must have known who I was, what I was like, but I didn't know anything about her, apart from the insanely criminal mind.

“How boring would this be for you? You handcuffed someone” I tried to say firmly but it came out almost a whisper and she returned it with a roll of her eyes and pulled her face away from mine.

"I don't think you understand yet..." she moved and I gasped. The heat of her hips on mine, the lace touching what I missed. Chimera had sat on my uncovered lap. "The more you complain the more I will make you feel good."

She moved her hips back and forth. My wrists ached and the handcuffs creaked, with the instinct I had to grip her thighs.

“Holy shit” I blurted out angrily.

"You're going to keep complaining, aren't you?" She moved her hips faster more times dancing on my completely hard member.

"Release me!" I ordered, with the same command tone I tried to use once.

“For you to run away?” Chimera's voice no longer had the playful tone it used to have, it was a mellow, pitiful voice. I felt her wetness on me.

“To move your hips faster.”

She groaned at my answer. I told you before, didn't I? Condemn me! My reasoning went to hell with a woman like that sitting on top of me. And I know how wrong she is, how crazy she is or even how long I would live. Ably, Chimera pushed the thin lace panties to the side, leaving that place free, and fitted me without warning. I didn't know which was the louder moan, mine or hers.

“You are…big” her voice almost like a cry.

“Release me” I begged, my last appeal.

"This is non-negotiable" she smiled, up and down slowly.

"What would be negotiable?"

"Speed. As I said, I'm here for you." For me, right?

“So, faster, Chimera.”

The next few minutes were a complete blur for me. The movements were fast and synchronized. Like a cornered brat, I wouldn't wait that long to come. I don't know at what time her bra came to rest on my neck releasing the sweet, intoxicating scent, while the huge pair followed the unimpeded movements that Chimera was making on top of me. Her small hands braced themselves on my abdomen, her fingernails clawing at me with desperation. I'm sure I'd do back if I had my hands free. I was so close.

The red light was really a sign from hell. Chimera used one of her hands to now lean on one of my thighs while the other moved toward her intimacy, the quick rhythm of her fingers following the same of her hip. I could see my cock going in and out of that tight pussy and that was the peak for me. The redness became even more blurred. My frantic mind moaned her name and she moved her fingers faster and thrashed in ecstasy over me. 

My hip was soaked, the biggest evidence of the crime. I didn't know what was hers anymore or what was mine. Her body fell wearily onto my torso, her hair with the same perfume as her bra consuming me more and more. After a few more minutes with Chimera's weight on top of me, I fell asleep again.

The room was just an empty place again, with no red lights, just the rays of the morning sun sneaking in. I still felt the presence of the handcuffs but they weren't there either. I cannot describe the extent of my grief. I can't even describe what happened the night before… Yes, my static cell phone on the nightstand said that another day had passed. I can't even know how to describe what had happened the night before.

And if I called the police? The most natural thing to do, of course.  But they would ask what happened to me, what am I going to say? Someone broke into my house, officer. She tied me up, undressed herself, undressed me, and rode hot on top of me. I was going to be the major joke of the police department, in addition to the story being leaked, and I would come out as an attention seeker for inventing something like that. The media would fall on me, and I would start a witch hunt by the fans who would believe me. The bottom line is there's no chance of that happening. And my silence matters as consent. I have to accept this silently.

And so it went on for 3 months. My life has been very normal, pretty much the same. 

I went out to see Hoseok today, we drank and laughed together. Sometimes a quick memory would catch me up, taking a few seconds of my breath, but then it pass. God knows I'm driving home altered like this, that absolutely no one dreams I'm driving drunk like this. One less secret, one more secret. To apply double standards.

My house keys ended up on the living room table. I don't think I've eaten anything in the last few hours, a ramen would be fine. Microwaves saving me, because driving drunk is ok, now messing with boiling water when you're a little dizzy...

“I boil the water for you”

FUCK. WHAT THE FUCK.

“I always thought you had words on the tip of your tongue, where are they when I show up?”

The ice-cold water coming out of the faucet and filling my ramen pot overflowed and wet my hand, waking me up.

“I'm not tied up… I mean. Shit! What are you doing here?"

I dropped the spoiled pot of ramen in the trash. My hunger going to space.

“I just came to see how you are, I'm leaving in five. You shouldn't drive drunk,” she said so naturally. Insanely natural. Psycho.

"You shouldn't arrest people and sit on top of them." She laughed. I swear she laughed out loud. I wasn't kidding!

“You're really funny, I like that about you” she wore formal clothes. A suit was missing there. “I better get going. Forever, this time.”

“Your clothes are of great quality, are you rich? This is why you’re crazy?” I asked because it was a sincere doubt. I used to have cheap clothes and now I know what a designer label is.

"Actually, you're rich, I only make a bunch of money," she smiled.

“As a?”

“Lawyer. One of the good ones.”

“Is that what they teach in college? Breaking into houses and manipulating people?” She planned everything so perfectly that it was all just a dream, with no evidence, nothing. I had no idea how.

“This one is on me, I confess.”

She left, walking towards the door of my house to leave I believe so. She's leaving.

"Wait, do you really think I'm going to let you go free like this?" It was my turn to laugh.

“I don't think so, but I would recommend it.”

“Would you recommend it? Really?"

"Yea. Let me explain, if you prevent me from going it will be a deprivation of liberty and I am inside your house, which constitutes false imprisonment and kidnapping since we are not related. Your word against mine and I know what I'm saying.”

Yeah, she knew what she was talking about. A psychopath with legal education. But you know what, I wasn't defenseless this time. 

I walked over to Chimera and took her by the wrist. I think I spoke too close to her face. Everything blurred, it was the alcohol or it was her.

“You think you can come and go anytime you want…”

"From your home? I said it was my last time” she said firmly without losing her pomp.

"Of my life."

I don't even know if what I said made sense. Her gaze failed on mine, I was too close to not notice.

"Tell me if it's fair to fuck with my head and leave me thinking about it a hundred times and come back as if nothing happened."

"Sorry for bothering you" she smiled cynically and I kissed her. 

Honestly, fuck if she was going to refuse. It was my fucking personal revenge. I felt the hairs on the back of my neck being pulled painfully closer to her. Naughty psychopath.

My hands felt all that fabric from the black skirt. I could finally feel that plump ass that filled my hands. Shit. I already knew that wine made the heart race, but the way my cock was throbbing was absurd. She was so small that I easily maneuvered her onto my kitchen counter. Her hips were at the same level as mine, her legs wrapped around me. I was making out with the psychopath. I broke the lewd kiss to unbutton her white shirt. They finally came back to me. I fit my face into the breasts of Chimera. She moaned. How I miss this song.

"Do you know you're crazier than me?" Her voice cracked as I kissed one of her breasts. I smiled. I didn't know, I was finding out now. A new fact.

"I think I know now, either way, it's your fault."

"I'm glad," she said almost in a whisper, her hands scratching my shoulders through my plain white shirt.

“That's not enough. That's not fucking enough.” I don't usually act like this. I think I'm too soft anytime, but in my heart, I wanted to unload everything on Chimera. “You know I'm going to fuck you, don't you? Do you know that it's you who will scream my name tonight? It's you who will be wondering if you should have enjoyed being invaded so much.”

“Hunt me and kill me, Bellerophon.”

This bitch is totally roleplaying. The soft voice asked for the violence I wanted to give. Giving me a free hand. I turned her back to me, her toes having trouble reaching the floor and I didn't care. I rubbed my hips against her tight skirt, her ass heating me. We both groan. I lifted the skirt that bothered me so much, the light pink lace panties were completely removed, I took advantage of the journey to take a look at the golden and firm legs.

“Show me your arrow,” she said within the character she'd fit us both from the start. Completely and irrevocably frantic.

I pulled my shorts down and without warning, I pushed myself all in. She was already wet, waiting for me. What motivated her was the whole show, everything that was out of the ordinary. Worse than that, it was her pulling me into this myth. I've never felt as much pleasure as hunting with the intent to kill. Her whimper was like the cry of a wounded beast, I knew it hurt and I knew she enjoyed it as much as I did. I pushed hard again, her body sliding against the cold, hard marble. And so, over and over again as far as I thought it was necessary. I felt myself pulsing inside her. The feeling of riding her, so helpless, made me avenged. She'd done the same to me, she'd created a need I didn't have and I would make her feel the same way. She would remember this for the rest of her life. The loud moans, tears streaming from her eyes, her mouth swollen and red from my previous intense kisses.

“The more you complain the more I will make you feel good. Remember that?" I asked thickly. She nodded in agreement and smiled. Obviously, she remembered. I completely pulled my cock out of her and she moaned in protest. I almost gave up on my idea at her protest. Almost. “You will come in my bed, Chimera. Don't worry."

I left her on her feet again to kiss her. Mouth salty with sweat and tears. On the way to my room, the rest of the clothes were left in the middle. She looked even smaller in my spacious bed. Straight black hair like a mane around her head. The legs open inviting me to enter again. Her full, rough breasts pointed at me. Chimera's smile was the most beautiful I had ever seen in my life. 

So I killed the beast. My quick movements were as strong as her spasms beneath me. My back burned from her nails, the beast fighting the hero and I think I won.

Chimera buried her face in my neck, her makeup smeared beautifully because of me. She was beautiful. And then I had already lost my sanity again. My heart was pounding and I came. She knew that and hugged me closer to her. We were totally finished. This time my weight was on top of her.

We stayed in the same position for long minutes. Any movement meant the end of the fantasy. Maybe I didn't want the end and neither did she.

"I'm falling asleep," I said, breaking the silence.

“Why don't you sleep?” She asked, touching my forehead. The pompous voice was gone.

“For you to disappear?”

"Isn't that what you want?"

“Not anymore,” I said. As unusual as it sounded, it was true.

"I don't believe you," she laughed. Shit, that smile!

"I fuck strangers who show up in the middle of the night, I drive drunk, but I don't lie."

“At least perjury is out of the question.”

“You talk in Law all the time?”

“I'm just showing myself. Handcuffing someone is not enough.”

She was funny. Oh, let's face it, it was all comical. Ironic. Sarcastic. 

I would sleep anytime. Her fingers stroking the back of my neck weren't helping to keep me awake. I hesitated a few times and embraced the darkness.

The empty bed the other day was disappointing. Again. But this time I was sure it hadn't been a dream. I wouldn't be able to so vividly imagine everything that had happened, not even drunk. I sat up in bed carefully, the effect of the alcohol still stuck in my bloodstream. My lips felt swollen, I had kissed Chimera too hard. I wanted to consume her completely. But I had no idea who it was, or where I would find it. I already missed her. I don't know if it's because I'm crazy like her or because I never allow myself to have someone because I'm always alone. Because this house is always empty. Someone entered by force as nature's law of expansion. Everything has to be occupied, even my heart. But, no one plans to take the path that brings you nowhere. Here I stand before you all and say it's over.

Then the smell of coffee entered my room.