Unfamiliar Heaven
I'm on my way to an unfamiliar heaven
I may not recognize it now, but I will someday
I get comfortable in hell
'Cause it's hard for me to tell
How I could burn myself if I stay
I want to make it to the other side
Know I did all I could, that I really tried
Believe there's something better for me in this life
I want to quit spinning in circles
Roll down past the city limits
Find out what's beyond these borderlines
So I'm on my way to an unfamiliar heaven
I may not recognize it now, but I will someday I get comfortable in hell
'Cause it's hard for me to tell
How I could burn myself if I stay
But I'm on my way...
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Crazy4U
Am I crazy for wanting to be crazy4u?
I feel something, just wish I felt the butterflies too...
Shouldn't this be the honeymoon stage
Where I'm jumping up and down at the sound of your name?
Maybe my feelings are just a little bit delayed...
But what happens if they never change?
But you like what I like, and you make feel safe
Don't have to beg for compliments, or over explain
Shouldn't that be enough?
But I've heard my friends talk about the ones they love
And I'm afraid of the words I'll never say
You deserve someone who will speak of you that way
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Tired Hearts (The Sign)
Map in my hands
Headed to my destination
Following it step by step
Without an inclination
That I’d ever need to take a detour
And even if I did that road would lead to so much more
But the weather had other plans
And I needed to seek shelter
On my way to the promise land
Where I found myself surrounded by strangers
Also looking for hope from the city of dangers
And on the door hangs a sign and it says:
“Rest your tired hearts
If you need to fall apart
Then go ahead, let it all out
Don’t need our permission
We’ll stand beside you
With every awkward admission
Because you’ll see we’ve all been there before
And each of us must hold on to one another until we're ready
to go back out this door (back out this door)"
Rest your tired hearts
Life’s a living hell
And only time will tell
But here at least
We’re in a room of angels
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Waste Basket
I found a picture of of us
It was stained, yeah, colors faded
A sign of what we’ve become
And there’s no way to change it
In another season
I would’ve kept it for sentimental reason
But now I know that’s not enough
For me to still have it
So it's going in the waste basket
Waste basket
If it’s broken, no need to still have it
Waste basket, waste basket
Marie Kondo says if it doesn’t bring you joy
Then you better throw it away
You used to bring me joy
But, honey, not today
So it's going in the waste basket
Waste basket
If it’s broken, no need to still have it
Waste basket, waste basket
Our love was once divine
But now it lost its shine
And no amount of polish is gonna make it fine
So it’s going in the waste basket
Waste basket
If it’s broken, no need to still have it
Waste basket, waste basket
And the good memories
They still hold a place my heart
But I need to make space on these shelves
for me to restart -
So it’s going in the waste basket
Waste basket
If it’s broken, no need to still have it
Waste basket, waste basket
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Bad Luck
You can be a good disciple
And always read your bible
Never forget to pray
You can listen to your Ma
Take the right advice from Pa
But still at the end of the day...
Suffer from bad luck
Bad luck
Bad, bad, bad luck
Oh, if you believe in karma
I got some news for ya
It's more or less the same
Just the troubles that your facin'
Chances are your enemies will also get a taste
No one's immune to bad luck
Bad luck
Bad, bad, bad luck
You can follow all the steps
Make the best use of your time
With all that practice, still trip at the finish line
You can go after your dreams, be so prepared
And still miss the train meant to take you there
Just a case of bad luck
Bad luck
Bad, bad, bad luck
And it can be so frustrating
Oh, devasting
When you're endlessly stuck
with bad luck
Bad luck
Bad, bad, bad luck
You probably think I'm jaded
That all my faith is faded
This song is to tell you to give up
But the beauty in the random
Means that it's possible
There's hope yet for a miracle
Calling that good luck
Good luck
Good, good, good luck
So still try the best you can
Be the better man
Even if life does not go the way you planned
And if you need a hand
I'm here to help
And bring you some good luck
Good luck
Good, good, good luck
Wishing you good luck
Good luck
Good, good, good luck
We could all use some good luck
Good luck
Good, good, good luck
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Best At Anything
I just wanted to be the best at anything
(the best at anything)
When I was younger they would say:
"That girl is so smart for her age!"
How quickly that would change
Fell into a sea of mediocracy
So painfully average in my teens
And I tried everything
To be the best at anything
But I always came up short
So I gave up on sports and after school activities
Put all my energy to be the nicest person you'd ever meet
But all that did was get people to walk all over me
(all over me)
Some may call it humility
But I'm just accepting defeat
In that I'll never be the best at anything
Dreamed to be a winner with a trophy in my hands
With the ones I love cheering from the stands
I guess it's just not meant to be
'Cause I am not the best at anything
Oh no, I am not the best at anything
And I just wanted to be the best at anything
(the best at anything)
Sometimes I'm ok with just being ok
But other times it's hard to say....
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When I was 4 years old, my family moved into a bigger house.
In the recesses of my memory, I can recall some of the houses we went to see before we ended up in the home I would spend the rest of my childhood growing up in.
There was one with a large fish tank, one with the scary dog next door, and the most memorable of all...
...the one with the spiral staircase.
Of course when my parents entertained my sister and me by asking which one we would pick that was my #1 choice.
Unfortunately, my parents had made their decision.
We would move next door to the scary dog - who turned out to the be the friendliest neighbor after all.
Oftentimes, I would imagine a parallel universe where we did move into the spiral staircase house.
I wondered how different my life would be and what chain reaction that could have caused in the other less than desirable areas of my life.
Then recently, I made a major discovery. As it was even though we didn't move into that house....my cousins did.
The same cousins I grew up with and visited frequently, including every holiday. But I didn't remember a spiral staircase?
It turns out my MacGyver handyman of a grandfather got rid of it and built a wall where it once stood, installing a regular staircase on the other side.
So what's to say of this new piece of information? Well of course, I always knew my what ifs were pretty fruitless. This was the life I lived, the childhood I had set in stone.
But all those years of fantasizing, I had no idea how I was already making memories in the house with the spiral staircase.
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Knowingly
No one hurts me knowingly
And I don't really let them see
The scars they leave under my sleeve
I guess that's on me, yeah...
It was an accident
It's just ignorance
Didn't mean to do it, do it, no
So I let it pass, roll off my back
No reason to cry over and over
But the tear stains on my pillow
Tell me that I don't know
how to really let this go
No one hurts me knowingly
And I don't really let them see
The scars they leave under my sleeve
I guess that's on me, yeah...
Well, my broken heart
is just collateral damage
to someone's selfish tendencies
Maybe if I spoke up
Tell them I had enough, they'd listen to me
But maybe they won't, and maybe they don't -
They don't care what they do to me
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Hated
Everybody likes me ‘cause I’m easy to be around
I don’t bring trouble and I always keep it down, down, down
Say what you wanna hear
‘Cause disappointment is my greatest fear
I’m a chameleon in every single room I’m in
But as I raise you up, I lose parts of me
Don’t know if I could handle the gravity
So I start to wonder if it’s worth the price - being nice
What if I was hated?
Just an annoying little bitch nobody liked
Say whatever comes to my head
And never think twice
What if I was too loud instead of too nice
Too nice
What if I was hated?
What if I was hated?
Maybe it would hurt a little bit
But I would get over it
And I would finally be free
Caring what you think about me
(What you think about me)
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Supervillain
I’ll be your supervillain
I’ll be your bad guy
If that’s what helps you sleep at night
Put the blame on me
I’ll be your enemy
The cause of all your pain and misery
And you’ll tell everybody I turned my back on you
But we all know that’s just not true
It’s far more complicated
This ain’t black and white
And I’m drawing a line in the sand tonight
Guilt is your weapon so I’m putting up a shield
Won’t apologize for how that makes you feel
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Grief comes and goes like a wave.
At first the waves come often and tosses you around like a riptide.
They drag you under and make it difficult to breathe.
Over time, the waves lessen until the water feels calm again.
You don’t have to wait for brief moments of tranquility.
You can actually float for a while.
But the waves still come.
Except you learn how to ride them.
Some are still harder to master.
The ocean of grief will never stop creating the waves.
But it’s true that what once felt like drowning,
Can turn into sailing.
And whatever you lost at sea
Will always be remembered dearly.
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True Blue
I wish there was another way, I wish there was another way
To fall out without a fallout
I don’t wanna runaway, I don’t wanna runaway
from you
So I’ll stay true
So I’ll stay blue
If that’s what I have to
Can’t pin the moment in time
When something clicked in my mind
And I’ve tried to shake It out
But I don’t want to turn it around
‘cause I swear things are brighter, I swear things are lighter with you,
And the heaviness is self inflicted
Because I can’t listen to logic
But you can’t stop a heart from being honest
Love can be selfless, even when it’s selfish x2
It’s up to choice, so I’m using my voice
I wish there was another way, I wish there was another way
To fall out without a fallout
I don’t wanna runaway, I don’t wanna runaway
from you
So I’ll stay true
So I’ll stay blue
If I have to
The sun will rise
And I’ll make it through the darkness
If I look into your eyes
I don’t wanna runaway, I don’t wanna runaway
from you
So I’ll stay true
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Where is your heart?
Where is your heart?
Is there a part?
Is there a part that you left for me?
I don’t hold the key,
And I should probably leave,
But there’s a light on your balcony
And if you let me in tonight,
I promise that I’ll make it right;
All I want is just to lay by your side
I would give you my whole heart,
But I know I don’t have yours
So all I’m asking is unlock the door
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Rare people, do it for the rare people
Swear if you care people
There will be less rare people
Hope comes and goes
Faith doesn’t always show
And love can seem like a lie
But there’s a shot with open eyes
We’ll find rare people
I know in my darkest nights
It was others who’ve shown me the light
People who gave a damn
Made me the way I am
And it’s sad that it’s true
That caring is not a normal thing to do
But if you got it don’t let it pass you
Become one of those rare people
Shed light and care people
in whatever way you know how
Somebody needs it now
If I give up on optimism
And stop dreaming
There’s only one thing left to believe in
And it’s rare people
Don’t let them cease to exist
I’ve lost what I can’t get back
Wondered if my identity was hacked
We’re all struggling to hold on to what doesn’t leave
Don’t think it’s a single person, but rather a breed
A breed of rare people
The ones that care people
So lets dare people
To be rare
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first to bleed
The world is getting crazy
At least I have you
At least I have you
But you’re slipping away
Like summer here yesterday
Turned today’s autumn afternoon
So I’ll take a leap of faith
As the leaves begin to change
Pray a warm fire comes my way
So I won’t need you
No I won’t need you
I won’t need you, no
It’s time I learn to let you go
But it’s not easy to find
Another way to pass the time
Fill the spaces in my mind
‘Cause you’re not just a game to play
Or a song to repeat all day
But soon you won’t need me
So I better hurry up and leave,
Better hurry up and leave,
Or I’ll be the first to bleed
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What Do I Mean?
What do I mean to you?
Do I mean a thing to you?
Or am I just someone you use...
Come on, I’ll make you feel better
Then you can cut the tether
And find something better to do
Maybe I act like I don’t mind
If you leave me hanging most the time
Brush it off my shoulders
But there’s still dirt left behind
And I’m not feeling fine
It’s not a question of my worth
I already know what I deserve
I just wish you knew too
I don’t wanna beg you
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