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slavetnt · 4 years ago

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Femdom experiences, ideas, and suggestions

I’d like to share some experience, ideas, and tips I’ve put together after about 4 years of dominating my BF. This is all my personal experience, so it won’t apply to everyone.

Firstly, I need to share that we aren’t in a 24/7 Domme-sub relationship. That doesn’t interest me or my BF. My BF came to me about 4 ½ years ago and confessed some of his desires for femdom sex, and I decided to entertain it with him. It’s been a lot of fun, but I’m not making it a “lifestyle”, although we do have some “extended” sessions, which I’ll detail later in this post. Its something we do for fun in the bedroom (well, not always in the bedroom). We still have frequent “vanilla” sex, he’s actually quite good at it. :) That being said, I’m not here to pass judgement on anyone else, or pretend to be an expert on the subject of BDSM. My current BF is the only person I’ve played with like this, but we’ve learned a lot about femdom by experimenting, reading, and talking to each other. A good portion of these ideas and suggestions were his idea, and many are mine. Some may think that this is topping from the bottom, but I don’t take it too seriously. This is all just in good fun for us.

Also, even though I talk about some of the stuff below being “forced”, that’s not to imply he hasn’t consented. We always have a safeword, and we discuss generalities before we decide on trying something new (although I do definitely surprise him with new activities to push his limits). Also, keep safety in mind with any activity. Not all of this is safe for every couple or every person. So, with all that out of the way, lets get to it!

I approach femdom by classifying activities into 4 categories, then I put them together for an experience. The categories I use are: Degradation/Humiliation, Pain and Control, Frustration/Teasing, and Service. I’ll go over activities in each then describe how I put them together.

DEGRADATION/HUMILIATION

This is a very fun category and can include a lot of different things. Here’s a list of activities that I enjoy inflicting on him.

Forced feminization - I frequently make him wear women’s clothing during our sessions. This can include lots of different outfits. Feel free to mix and match to your taste. Amazon is great for getting lingerie on a budget. I like to go with really girly colors and patterns for my guy. My favorites are:

High heels. These are an absolute necessity. You don’t need to spend a lot of money on these, but you might want more than one pair if you insist his outfits match.

Lingerie. This can include teddies, stockings, babydoll, fishnet dresses, etc.

Just a pair of panties. This makes him feel very exposed. I like ones that ride up his little butt (cheekies, thongs), but still cover his entire penis. Don’t let him wear anything else.

Pasties. This is very, very fun. Pasties are cheap, and not something you ever see a man wearing. A pair of high heels, pink thong, and some pasties is great outfit for him to wear while he cleans the bathroom for you.

Schoolgirl outfit. This is a classic, and can lead to some incredible role-playing situations. The skirt should be short enough you can see his little white panties peeking out without even bending over.

French Maid. Another classic, useful for the Service category I’ll go into later.

Makeup. This is a favorite activity. I love giving him a makeover. Super slutty makeup is the best and can be combined with any outfit.

Tight jeans, yoga pants, leggings. Pair these with a skin tight top and you’ve got a great outfit for lounging around the house.

Short shorts. These can be cut off jean type shorts, yoga style shorts, or anything you like. The shorter the better.

Corset. Use this to give him a girlish figure!

Women’s bodystocking. These are hilarious. They come in all kinds of patterns and colors, and are really cheap.

Halloween costumes. Great for any time of year! Amazon has cheap playboy bunny outfits, tinkerbell costumes, sexy nurse, etc. There are so many to choose from!

Pegging/dildo play - This falls into the pain category as well depending on your mood. I really feel that in order to make this act as degrading as possible, its important to get a dildo that looks and feels like a real penis. It should have balls and be a realistic skin tone. It should also be at least slightly bigger than his own penis (within reason). A big aspect that makes pegging so humiliating is the mental side to it. Obviously, there’s some physical to it as well, but just being forced to “deal” with a dick is mortifying to most straight men. Some activities involving your strapon or dildo:

Deepthroat training. Let’s eliminate that gag reflex ladies! Seriously one of the most degrading things you can do to your man is fucking his face. I like to recreate positions from porn in this activity. Relax on the couch or chair while wearing your strapon. Put him on his knees and make him get to work. If he’s not going deep enough grab his hair and force his face down on that dick! Trust me, he can take it. Don’t be gentle. Make sure he maintains eye contact like a good little porn star! I also like to have him lay on his back on the bed or couch, with his head hanging over the side and cram my dick down his throat. Do this until he gags, over and over, he’ll be drooling all over himself soon enough. Have him lie down on his back, then straddle his upper chest/neck area so the only thing you can see is his face. Put your dildo in his mouth and jackhammer that thing down his throat. Don’t be scared of hurting him, even if your dildo is on the large side of realistic. he’ll eventually be able to take it balls deep. He might complain that it doesn’t fit. Well, its your job to MAKE it fit. Yes he’s going to cough and gag, a lot, yes he’s going to have a lot of drool and mucus coming out of his mouth. That’s OK. Don’t be deterred by any sounds, drool, or complaints. Also give him instructions and compliments when appropriate (“yeah, show me your tongue” “hands behind your back and open wide bitch” “give me that throat” “that’s a good little cocksucker”)

EDIT: I’ve received several questions about this point. I’ll clarify exactly what were doing here and why. When I make him suck my dildo, I’m not getting any physical pleasure out of it and neither is he. This is not meant to be physically pleasurable to us, it’s meant to make him feel like my bitch. When you do this, make it an ordeal he needs to suffer through. When he’s on his knees in front of you, fuck his mouth hard and fast. Really make an effort to get your entire dildo down his throat as you thrust in and out. Make him suffer here for quite some time, 5, 10, 15 minutes even. Don’t let him get away with pulling his head away or anything either. Make him keep your dick in his mouth, see how long you can keep it buried balls deep in his mouth, lock your legs around his head if necessary. His jaw and throat should be very sore after this ordeal, and his face should be a mess of slobber and spit. Once he can take your whole dildo down his throat without gagging, its time to upgrade to something longer and/or thicker. Your goal should be to have him performing at THIS LEVEL and he won’t get there without proper training.

Butt fucking. Work up to this using your fingers, plugs (he should wear a large sized one for a while before a pegging session), and other toys, but eventually your goal should be forceful pounding. Make him feel what its like to really get fucked. While pegging him, yank his hair, push his face down into the bed or floor, slap his ass. Be creative with positions and locations. One of my favorites is the tile kitchen floor, he doesn’t have to be comfortable while getting fucked. Use lots and lots of lube here, it makes getting your dick in a lot easier on both of you.

Dildo masturbation. Make him suck and fuck himself with a dildo or other toys for your amusement. This one can be done with very minimal effort on your part. Just give him a toy, order him to the corner, and tell him to get it up his ass.

Using other objects to fuck him with. This can be a lot of fun, but be careful. Some items I’ve fucked him with: Beer bottle, drumsticks, vodka bottle,

Forced Nudity - This one is simple, but you can spice it up with toys if you like. Simply order him to be naked while you remain clothed. If you like, make him wear a butt plug that you can smack and wiggle around while he gets you a drink. Put a collar on him if you want, or combine this with forced feminization from above (for example make him wear only high heels, lipstick, and a chastity cage for the evening). Sometimes its fun to combine this with pegging. I’ll strap my dick on over my jeans, while he’s completely naked. Its a very humbling experience for him. I also frequently have him sleep naked.

Forced Performances. This is very entertaining and again a low-effort humiliation. Sometimes I like to put on some music and have him dance for me. I’ll make him perform a little strip tease, twerk, etc. Sometimes I will have him masturbate for me. I’ll give directions. (these are great times for video recording)

Spitting. We’re getting a little more extreme here. Don’t be afraid to spit on your male. This can be especially degrading during pegging, even more so during deepthroat training. While he’s making eye contact, just launch a huge wad of spit right in his face. He’ll love you for it! It can also be degrading while you’re criticizing his performance to spit in his face.

Golden showers. We haven’t worked our way up to here yet, and to be honest, I don’t know if I want to. Something we have tried in this area though, making him lick me clean after I take a piss.

Verbal humiliation (Disclaimer: Talk to your partner about this first if you’re worried about crossing a line with him, because this can be emotionally charged.) I really like this, and to me, there are two components. 1. You degrading him with words. 2. Making him degrade himself with words.

You degrading him.

Name calling. Call him degrading names. This can include the following: Bitch, sissy, cunt, slut, whore, piece of shit, stupid, worthless.

Penis humiliation/emasculation. This is common on femdom porn sites. Make fun of the size of his dick, his sexual ability, the things he lets you do to him, etc. Terms like shrimp-dick, bitch boy, butt boy, fuck-hole, cum eater, cum dumpster, cocksucker, limp dick. etc.

Combine insults. Example: “You’re a little limp dick cocksucker.” “You’re a little cum eating bitch, aren’t you?”

Being forceful and insulting with your directions. Example: Instead of saying “get on your knees and suck my dick”, say “Get on your fucking knees and get this dick down your throat you little bitch.” Instead of using his name and telling him to bend over the kitchen table for his pegging, say something like, “Hey shrimp-dick! Get in here, bend over the table and get fucked.” Instead of saying come here and lick my pussy say “get over here and make me cum you little piece of shit”.

Tell him what you’re going to do to him later. Send him a text letting him know you’re going to make him eat your pussy and send him away hard and frustrated.

Order him to do things for you. *MOST IMPORTANTLY: Don’t be afraid to raise your voice, or even yell. Its encouraged in this situation that you will be very forceful with your voice. Yell in his face if he isn’t licking your pussy correctly. Yell in his face after you cum and tell him to get the fuck off the bed and do the dishes.

Making him degrade himself. This can be really fun.

Make him beg. Use this for anything, make him beg to fuck you, beg you to peg him, beg you to let him masturbate, beg you to let him eat his cum, beg you to spank him, etc. It doesn’t even have to be something he wants. The key to this though, is to make sure his begging meets your standards. If you don’t believe he really wants it, punish him and make him try again, and again until you really believe him.

Make him apologize. Maybe the orgasm he gave you was mediocre. Maybe he didn’t take your dildo up his ass with enough enthusiasm. Maybe when you told him to deepthroat your strapon, he couldn’t get his nose to touch your stomach like you insisted. He should be punished for such infractions, but he should also tell you how sorry he is first. (maybe after his punishment too.) Make sure he apologizes sincerely for any shortcomings. Shit, sometimes I make him apologize for having a small dick (even though he doesn’t).

Make him thank you. Did you let him have an orgasm? Did you fuck his little butthole really well? Did you let him lick your asshole? He needs to thank you for the privlege.

Make him confess. Make him tell you his fantasies. This works especially well if you have him on the edge of orgasm. Make him confess a deep, dark fantasy that he’s never told anyone before. (He’ll probably run out of ideas at some point, you can punish him for that)

Public Play. There are some really fun ways you can take this play out of the house for some really great humiliation that doesn’t involve violating other people boundaries.

Clothes shopping. I enjoy taking him to stores, wal-mart, target, etc. and picking out some really girly panties and outfits for him to wear. If there isn’t anyone around, I’ll occasionally make him go try them on in the dressing room.

Wearing plugs or other toys in public.

And finally, for one of the most humiliating things a man can ever do……

Swallowing cum and/or getting a facial. He fucking hates this, which is why I love it. Any time he has an orgasm during any femdom activity, he’s eating it or its going on his face. I don’t care where it lands, how he came, if it was an accident, or if he really doesn’t want to. That cum is going in his mouth and down his throat. There are a lot of ways to accomplish this, but I really enjoy planning ahead for it. Its also a huge turn on for him, knowing that he’s going to be forced to eat it, even though immediately after he cums he’s absolutely repulsed by it. Some of my favorite ways to do this are:

Make him cum into a condom, then empty it into his mouth.

Make him have a ruined orgasm (I’ll explain later) onto the tile or hardwood floor. Then make him lick it up. If he resists, shove his face in it. If you have carpet, that isn’t a problem. Make him suck the cum out of it until its all gone.

If you let him cum inside you or on you, make him suck the cum out of you or lick it off of you.

While he’s wearing a pair of panties, rub his dick until he cums in them. Then peel them off and make him lick it out, or smear them all over his face.

Flip his legs over his head into the piledriver position (good for pegging also) and make him shoot his load all over his own face. This is a favorite of mine, simply because of the role reversal mind fuck going on in his head. I also like making him leave the jizz on his face for the rest of the day.

Make him cum into a glass and then pour it into his mouth, or pour it all over his face and/or hair.

However he gets the cum into his mouth, occasionally I’ll have him “play” with it. Gargle it, show it to me on his tongue, drool it out and then suck it back up like a porn star.

EDIT: Ladies, he’s going to be much more compliant with eating his semen if he has had a ruined orgasm instead of a pleasurable one. I mention this below but I’ll go into some more detail here. When your man has an orgasm his sexual desire drops off a cliff. He won’t want to eat his cum and will resist. But if you give him a ruined orgasm, he doesn’t get much pleasure at all, and his sexual desire remains high, but he still can expel a good amount of sperm. The goal here is to make his semen come out of his dick without pleasure, but for most men, the pleasure and orgasm actually begins several seconds before he ejaculates. So I like to have fun with this. With him on his knees and his hands restrained I’ll stroke his dick until he gets very close to orgasm, and then when I think hes right on the edge, I’ll let go and watch. I’ll wait about 20 seconds and if no semen comes out, start again. If you’ve done this perfectly, his semen will leak out about 10-15 seconds AFTER you stopped stroking it. He’ll be left sexually frustrated, but you actually DID give him an orgasm, its not your fault he didn’t feel it! He’ll be much more compliant in regards to consuming semen in this way. I like to combine this with chastity sometimes too. I’ll have him locked in the cage for a few days, give him a ruined orgasm and then put him back in. Its wonderful!

ADDED HUMILIATION BONUS!

For added humiliation, I frequently take pictures and video of my pet during these humiliating sessions. I keep these and then use them later for addiitonal humiliaiton. Seriously, having a video of him, with his face covered in his own semen, apologizing for not deepthroating my strapon well enough, all while dressed in daisy dukes and a bikini top….well that’s just good entertainment. Sometimes I make him watch some of the videos with me and laugh at him. It always results in a giant erection in his pants, haha.

PAIN AND CONTROL

DISCLAIMER: It seems online, many people are nervous about this category, and with good reason. Its sometimes hard to tell what your partner is comfortable with, and they may not even be sure of it themselves. So take all of this slowly at first until you and your partner can figure out what works for you. That being said, I seek to push right up against my boyfriend’s limits here. This is where the “forced” part of the humiliation listed above becomes more real.

There are several ways to inflict some pain on your male, here are some of my favorites.

Face slapping. I really enjoy this. Nothing gets his attention so quickly as a pop to the side of his cheek. Several (5-6) in quick succession create a look of fear in his face that I love. He can take a lot of punishment here too, just watch out for his eyes and ears. This is an especially good thing to practice while you’re fucking his face or he’s licking your pussy and/or ass. Use your slaps to get his attention, give direction, and have fun. “I slap told slap you slap to slapfocus slap on slap my slap clit!! slap”

Hair Pulling. Grab his hair and yank his head around. Do this while pegging (in any position), while he’s giving you oral (or sucking your dildo), to lead him where you want him, to hold his head in place while you slap him, to force his face into a puddle of semen, etc.

Spanking/whipping. The most common. I like to use a belt, flogger, occasionally a cane.

Cock and Ball Torture. Another common theme on femdom websites. Here’s a list of techniques I use.

Squeezing/Pinching. Grab his balls and squeeze. Pinch the head of his dick.

Slapping. Simple. To make it hurt worse, you can grab his balls into one hand and hold them tight and steady while you slap.

Punching. Same as above but creates a lot more pain. :)

Kicking. Kicking him right in the balls after you just fucked his ass can be quite the experience for both of you. Take this one more slowly haha.

Nipple Play. Most people know about this already. Use clamps, clothespins, pinches, flicks, twists, and scrapes to inflict some pain here. He can take more than you think.

Chemical Play. Ok, we’re getting to some more extreme areas here again. This is not to be taken lightly, as many people’s bodies react differently. Here’s a list of things we’ve tried.

Ice cubes. Rub on his penis, balls, asshole, and nipples. This can sometimes eliminate a pesky erection in a pinch. I’ve inserted cubes into his anus as well, he doesn’t like that lol.

Ben-gay/Icy Hot. Rub this on the penis balls, taint, and anus. This creates a very unpleasant burning sensation. My pet feels very intense pain for about 10-20 minutes. It then subsides to a mild cooling sensation.

Tabasco/hot sauce. Same as above, rub on genitals and asshole. Your man’s experience will vary here depending on the type of sauce you use, the duration you leave it on, and the amount you use. I reserve this for serious punishment. I once poured some hot sauce on the dildo I fucked him with. Let’s just say he didn’t have a great night.

Electricity. You need to be even more careful here. My only experience is a dog shock collar. I attach the collar around his penis and testicles. It has a vibrate function (for when he’s been a good boy) and 8 levels of shocks. We’ve gotten up to level 6. He really hopes I don’t have to use 7 or 8 on him. You can experiment with the position of the collar on his genitals. If the contacts are touching his balls, he’ll feel it throughout his sack and his perineum. If you flip it over and the contacts touch the base of his penis, shocking sensations will affect his entire penis, all the way to the head. We’ve experimented with different levels here, and it seems his penis is much more sensitive to electricity than his balls are. Your man’s experience may vary. This collar also has a sound/beeping function that I use as a pager when I need him. If his balls beep, he has 10 seconds to be on his knees in front of me, regardless of his prior activity, or else he’ll face punishment.

Bondage and Restraints. I keep this simple as I don’t enjoy taking the time to set up intricate bondage situations. I’m sure my BF would like it, but its just too much effort when I can use simpler items to accomplish the same things. I own a few types of gags, a collar and leash, handcuffs, bed restraint system and, my favorite, a spreader bar (bar with cuffs for hands and feet).

Control. A lot of the more severe pain and control items above are essentially just a method to get my guy to do what he’s told. This is where the “forced” aspect really comes into play. For example, he absolutely hates eating sperm. But if I want him to eat sperm, he’s going to fucking eat it. So I use pain to get him to do it. One way I do this is with the electric dog collar and handcuffs. After he cums, and there’s a load of sperm sitting there on the floor, I give him a choice. Either put your face on it and suck up all that lovely sperm, or, get shocked in increasing intervals and strength. Eventually he’ll do it. This is an area where we’ve both agreed that he doesn’t get a choice any longer. He submits to being forced to lick his jizz off the floor.

Another example is dildo play. If i instruct him to deepthroat my strapon, and get the entire 7 inches down his throat while maintaining eye contact, that’s his job to do. If he doesn’t, I inflict pain. For example, I might start by slapping his face as a warning if he’s disobeying, increasing the strength and quantity of the slaps as I try to work the dildo down his throat. If that doesn’t work, I move on to other means. I may whip him with the belt, or punch his balls a few times then give him another chance. I increase the pain until he obeys. Its really fun to give him tasks that are hard to acheive. I also use pain as punsihment for failure. If he can’t make me orgasm in a certain time period, or its less pleasurable than what I expected, I may attach the spreader bar to his ankles and wrists, gag him, slather his cock and balls with ben-gay, and then go have a glass of wine while he contemplates how he can improve his performance next time.

This doesn’t mean I need a reason to hurt my toy. When we’re playing, I may slap him for fun or for no reason at all. If he’s getting pegged, he should expect to get popped in the face a few times just because I fucking feel like it. Maybe I’ll kick his little blue balls afterwards while he’s still on all fours on the kitchen floor, just because I want to be a bitch.

FRUSTRATION/TEASING

This is really quite simple. When we’re playing, I cum when I want, he cums when he’s allowed to. I enjoy making him suffer in this way, its honestly the most fun part of all this. There are a lot of ways I enjoy teasing and frustrating him and I’ll go over some of them now. There is one hard and fast rule in this game for us. He must always ask permission to ejaculate, no exceptions. He’ll be punished severely for an unauthorized orgasm or ejaculation.

Chastity. This is a must for us. While we don’t play 24/7, I enjoy making him wear a chastity device frequently when we’re apart. I work nights, so if I’m at work, chances are he’s locked into “The Vice”. This is a locking chastity cage, similar to others, only this one has an anti-pullout mechanism that makes it very difficult to remove without the key. Basically “The Vice” (available at www.lockedinlust.com ) is a plastic sheath for his dick that attaches to a ring around the base of his balls. It prevents erections and masturbation very well for the price. I don’t want my man’s dick mangled by a piercing for this game we play, and some of the other devices out there require that to be secure. The Vice keeps it secure and out of his (or anyone else’s) hands. Its so empowering to be able to restrict access to his own dick. I have the power to grant him erections and orgasms, he can’t have them without me or my approval. The length of time he wears the device really changes, but is up to me. I usually don’t keep him in it for more than a couple days, but we’ve had times that I left him in there for over 3 weeks. He really wasn’t happy about the time I had to leave town for 4 days and took the key with me, AFTER he’d been locked up for a week already.

There are a log of fun chastity games you can find online. Some fun chastity games we play:

Try to cum. I enjoy leaving the device on him, and tell him to try to have an orgasm with it on (no vibrator allowed!). Its fucking entertaining to see him hump his hand, finger his asshole, shake the cage around, pinch his own nipples, etc. I like to offer some cheering words of encouragement here for him. Usually I have him do this on the floor in the middle of the living room while I sit on the couch and watch. He hasn’t been able to cum yet, but maybe one day he’ll get there. (Another great video opportunity)

Coin flip. If he’s been locked up for several days, I’ll strap him to the bed or handcuff him to remove the device. Then I’ll start stroking his dick until he’s very close to orgasm, right on the edge. Then I flip a coin, heads I finish him off. Tails, I immediately stop, put an ice pack on his dick and lock him back up once he’s soft again. Better luck next time honey.

Roll of the dice. If he rolls a six, he gets to cum. If not, that’s the number of days he stays locked up until he gets another chance. This went on for over 3 weeks for us at one point. He was really on edge lol.

Chastity can also play into the control aspect as well. Sometimes when we play I don’t take the cage off. For example, he doesn’t need an erection to get fucked in his ass or to use my dildo and vibrator on my pussy, so why take it off? If he starts giving me a bad attitude, I’ll simply add another day or two to his lockup time. I use this as punishment for disobedience when playing, so it gives me more control.

One of the big things you’ll notice if you start incorporating chastity into your sex life, is that he will become more and more agreeable and obedient as time goes on, if you restrict his orgasms. If we’re playing with chastity more seriously, I like to make him wait 1 to 2 weeks between orgasms. He has a high sex drive, so when I do this, he gets so horny he’ll do anything to get out of his chastity cage. Its really entertaining to see what I can get him to do. Once, after 13 days locked into the Vice, I insisted he detail my car if he wanted out of the device. He whined and complained, so I told him that he just earned himself another 3 days in the device, and I still expected the car detailed.

The MOST IMPORTANT thing when incorporating chastity into your sex life is this. SAY NO. Don’t be swayed by his begging, whining, or complaining. Firstly lets get this out of the way, no one NEEDS to have an orgasm. He wants to cum, he doesn’t need to. So lets get that little idea out of the way immediately. We have a rule, when he’s locked up, he gets to politely ask for an orgasm once per day. If I feel like it, I’ll have him earnestly beg me. This is great for extracting promises from him. But if I say no, he needs to shut the fuck up about it immediately. Occasionally I’ll say yes, but most of the time I’ll say no as I’ve already decided on how long he’s going to be locked up. Do not feel bad about this. In fact, relish your power here.

I get off on having him go down on me right after I tell him “No, you’re staying locked up.” While we both agreed to incorporate chastity devices into our sex life, the lockup duration is my decision alone. Use the device to modify his behavior to your liking. If you want something from him, sexual or not, give him the order. If he doesn’t comply, add time in the device. The power is intoxicating.

Teasing. Sometimes he wears The Vice around the house, sometimes not. But regardless I like to wear skimpy clothing, rub up against him, feel and squeeze his balls, ass cheeks, and body just to see him get a boner (or try to, hehe). I’ll take this a lot further sometimes, stroking his dick until he starts leaking precum, getting him close to orgasm, only to stop and tell him to calm down. Sometimes I even let him fuck me until I have an orgasm or two, then tell him to stop. This is delightfully frustrating for him. Other times I’ll leave him in the chastity cage and masturbate right in front of him. One of my favorite teases is to use his mouth to make me cum and send him away completely denied. Sometimes I tell him I’m going to make him cum, only to stop at the last second and tell him I changed my mind.

Ruined Orgasm. By far the funniest aspect to this whole femdom thing. Its really an artform. The basic idea is that you get your man very, very close to the point of orgasm and then stop all stimulation. If you do it right, he’ll just tip over the edge, and his semen will dribble out of his dick with barely any force, and next to no pleasure. This works best with his hands restrained so he can’t try to finish the job himself. I like to pair this sometimes with the shock collar to make it completely miserable.

SERVICE

So now we get to the fun part. A lot of the above is playing into my man’s fetish, and that’s ok. I do love him, and I don’t have a problem doing stuff for his enjoyment. But you can be sure I’m going to be getting something out of all this! A big part of femdom is serving the woman in the relationship. And I’ll detail how that all works for us now.

Sexual Service. This encompasses everything. If I want my ass eaten out for 2 hours while I watch TV, he does it. If I want a full body massage from a muscled, naked man, that’s what I get. If I want to fuck and get off two or three times, I get that. If I want my nipples sucked while I use my vibrator on myself, that’s what I get. Nothing is off limits to me sexually. I speak, he obeys. That’s just how it goes. I typically don’t orgasm from oral sex alone or penetrative sex alone, and sometimes it can take quite a while for me to get there. The point is, I get what I want. Not that I want him eating my ass for 2 hours necessarily, but I’ll make him do something like that sometimes just because I can. (Then sometimes make fun of him for it.)

Facesitting. I love sitting on his face. Its a great experience to cum all over his face. Sometimes I use just his tongue, while other times I’ll shove a dildo in his mouth and ride it while using my vibrator. I also have a gag that has a dildo sticking out of it. Whatever I’m using, its important that I’m only concerned with my own pleasure during this experience. Don’t worry about whether or not he’s able to breathe, if his tongue is tired, if his neck hurts, etc. In fact, its quite enjoyable to put him in intentionally uncomfortable positions for this. We have a hard wooden chair that I like to use for this. He’ll be required to sit on the floor and lean his head back onto the seat of the chair. This hurts his neck and head when I really start riding and bouncing on it, but who gives a fuck? He needs to focus on my orgasm, not his temporary discomfort.

As part of the sexual service aspect of femdom in our sex life, we’ve decided that he no longer decides when and where he gets to orgasm, when and where I get to orgasm, and he doesn’t decide on when or where any other sexual activity takes place. That’s up to me now. This doesn’t mean that he doesn’t initiate sex any longer, far from it. But it does mean he doesn’t get to complain, and he doesn’t get to turn me down when I want it either.

The goal of sexual service is two-fold. One, for you to get all the pleasure you want. Two, for him to feel completely objectified. When you are using him sexually, think of him as just another sex toy, a dildo that you can use up and throw away when you are finished.

But this isn’t limited to sexual service only.

Domestic Service. Basics. When we’re in femdom mode, he does the chores. All of them. We get to spice up mundane things like cleaning the bathroom and vacuuming in easy ways. For example, if the dishes need washed, and the kitchen mopped, I tell my bitch to get his maid outfit and shock collar on and bring me the large butt plug. While he gets dressed I may watch TV, text friends, do some shopping online, or anything else I want. When he’s ready, he lubes up the plug and I put it up his tight little ass. He then goes off to do whatever I’ve told him to do while I relax. After he’s done I may or may not inspect his work, if he did a good job then he may get a reward. His reward may be the privilege of kissing my asshole for example. If its not up to par he may get punished. This can be implemented immediately, or added to a play session later. If you are going to go this route though, I would suggest using punishments he really wants to avoid (extended chastity time, severe spankings, etc.) or else you may find him purposefully messing up in order to get some “punishment” he wants.

This applies to any chore we need completed. My laundry, dishes, car washes, lawn mowing (its funny seeing him on a riding mower when I know there’s a plug up his ass), cooking, etc.

Personal Service. These are generally intimate things that I want done for me. They can really play up the tease element as well. Some examples:

Shave me. In the shower or bath, I like to have him shave my legs and pussy.

Toenails/pedicure. I pick the color, then he massages, moisturizes my feet. Then polishes my nails for me. He’s also responsible for removing any old polish from my nails.

Massage. Sometimes just a shoulder rub, other times I’ll be nude and he is required to give me a full body massage with oil. I like for him to be nude for this as well. It’s really torture for him to give me a few orgasms afterwards and stay denied.

Body worship. It can be really relaxing to have him kiss and nuzzle my thighs, feet nipples, and pussy. I especially enjoy having my asshole worshiped though. Just light kisses, licks and nuzzles. Basically he’s making out with my asshole. It’s a serious power trip to have him do this while I watch TV or play games on my phone, ignoring him except to give instructions if I want something done differently.

PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER

I’ve outlined several ideas and topics here, and now I’ll give an example on how I’ve put all of it together. Remember when reading this, its all in fun, and it doesn’t necessarily have to make a lot of sense. Remember, if your guy is into femdom, he likes a lot of this kind of stuff already.

I like to choose something from each category when we play, just to round out the session. Not always, but frequently.

For one session I decided we were going to do some pegging, so before I got home I told him to get himself cleaned up, naked, and get a plug in. I got home about an hour later, so he’d been stretched out for a little while. I got home, grabbed him by the hair and dragged him into the garage. I told him to get on all fours in the middle of the floor and wait. He waited there for 20 minutes. I know he was scared, he’d never been fucked on the garage floor before. It wasn’t clean, and he was completely naked except for the plug in his ass.

I came in turned all the lights on and started taking pictures. I was already wearing the strapon. I made him smile for the camera, and pose for me. It looked like a really trashy photoshoot. I took several pictures in varioius positions and then I told him it was time to get busy.

I lubed up my cock, slowly pulled out the plug and got to work. I fucked him on the floor of the garage for about 5 minutes, eventually really pounding him. I pulled him up by his hair, bent him over the hood of my car and pounded some more. I insisted he fake an orgasm like a girl. It was reallly funny listening him attempt to moan and scream like a woman orgasming.

Once he was done, I pulled him around by the hair and spit directly into his face. I told him that was the worst fuck I’d ever had and told him to “go clean my fucking bathroom”. He stared at me dumbfounded, so I slapped him hard in his face and repeated it louder. He quickly scurried off to the master bath. About 5 minutes later I came in and threw the strapon and butt plug on the floor and told him to clean up my toys as well. When he came and reported that he was done, I went to inspect his work. It was spotless.

So I told him to get himself cleaned up and ready for bed. As a reward I let him go down on me for a while and then use my vibrator to give me an orgasm. He didn’t get to cum that night. (but we did cuddle and watch a movie)

There are many more ways you can mix and match categories, and many of them run together. For example, you can facefuck your man with your strapon, while you rub his dick. Once you’re satisfied he’s learned how to deepthroat, pull him off and make him beg for the privilege of masturbating in your presence. You can record this on video if you like, then, make him eat his own cum on video. The possibilities are endless! Again, I know a lot of this isn’t “authentic” if you’re doing it for your submissive partner, but that doesn’t really matter to me. What matters is that we’re having fun, and I get what I need out of it too.

Amazing add from one or the subscribers! Thanks for that!

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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Being a Dom

In the BDSM world, “Dominant” is a word that’s thrown around a lot. Being a Dom can seem very appealing. Men often want to be more dominant sexually in bed, but also in their relationships, and even in life in general. However, there is a new wave of women who are finally realising they too can be dominant and guess what, they can often do it well. Unfortunately, there are a lot of fake Doms out there. How can you make sure you’re not acting like one? Or if you’re a submissive, what should you look for in a Dom? Let’s consider what it truly means to be a real Dom.

What a Dominant isn’t

To start, let’s focus on some of the warning signs of a bad or fake Dom. If they focus only on what they are getting than what they are giving that is a huge clue. Of course the nature of a Dom should be somewhat selfish but they should also always make sure that the sub is satisfied not just sexually, but emotionally and physically too. But just like any relationship, trust needs to be earned. A fake Dom may say things like, “You’re not really a sub,” or, “A good sub would do XYZ.” If you’re a sub, don’t fall for it. And if you’re a Dom, don’t say things like that unless the sub consents to being talked to that way. Real emotional harm can be done.A real Dom is dominant at all times, not just when it suits them.

What is a Dom?

The definition of a Dominant is an important, powerful person who likes to be in charge. They crave obedience and need to be in control. They tend to be the “Alpha Male/Female,” and that is why “Dom” is always spelled with a capital while “sub” is always lowercase.

They strive to exercise control in all things, not just over their sub sexually. This means that they have order in their own personal lives. It is not uncommon for a Dom to have an obsessive-compulsive personality. They take great pride in their health, their homes, vehicles, and jobs, knowing these all reflect on them. The Dom takes responsibility for the wellbeing and the proper training, guidance, and discipline of their sub. The Dom also maintains a stable and safe environment in which their sub may perform their duties in service of the Dom.

Doms are not perfect; they will mess up from time to time. They can still apologize without appearing weak by just admitting what they did wrong and what they will do to fix it. Doms shouldn’t lose their temper. They can get mad and angry but they should always strive to be in control. Another challenge a female Dom may face is going against society’s rules of being kind and gentle as is expected of the fairer sex. They’re supposed to be the “nice girl.” Many women find it hard to be assertive in bed because of this. Bullshit, the world has changed. They may feel guilty always taking, but a Dom needs to remember that subs want and need to be used to serve. The more a Dom demands of their sub, the happier the sub will be. That doesn’t mean that a Dom can’t be giving in bed, but just being assertive in that part of the relationship will help them fulfil their role. Ways a Dom can do this in a sexual context are:

Holding their sub down during sex

Tying up their sub in bed so they are restrained

Telling their sub what to do sexually instead of asking

Delaying their sub’s orgasm to show they are in control of it

Another challenge new Doms have to overcome is being afraid of being too strict and hard on their sub with punishments. If anything, I think I get off too easily sometimes. Remember I crave the approval of my Dom and want to be punished when I have disappointed her.

How to be more Dominant

A Dom’s body language and speech need to be powerful and in control. Doms should have good posture and stand tall, being above the sub, often making them sit below them or kneel. A Dom should also talk confidently and be direct. They shouldn’t ever ask, “Where would you like to go to dinner?” They would say, “We are going out to dinner. Do you have any preference before I decide where?”. One of my favourite things my Mistress does is tell me to make her coffee or fetch a drink. When we were vanilla she would ask me, “Do you think you can make me coffee please?” Now she just tells me to do it and it always puts a smile on my face to perform this simple task for her. Watch and see how happy your sub will be to serve you.

How does a Dom train a sub?

Training a sub is a lot of work and not to be taken lightly. It is a very rewarding process though. When a Dom trains a sub they are moulding them to be a better version of themselves. Behaviour modification is achieved through maintaining strict consistent structure and order. subs thrive on a set routine and rules and protocols can help a Dom provide that. The sub should keep a journal so the Dom can get inside their head. Punishments are usually necessary to help guide and correct them, as is praise. It takes constant effort, but It is a beautiful thing when the sub becomes exactly what the Dom desires.

True Dominance is not just a role, it is a way of life. Being a Dominant means they are held to a higher standard, but it is all worth it. They will receive the ultimate gift of a sub’s willing submission. ♥

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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Being a Sub

Serving a Dominant is a very fulfilling lifestyle. However, many submissive beginners are lost. They don’t know what the role entails. Many times they are just looking for someone to fix them, to make them feel more complete. In all honesty though, being a sub is a lot of work, mentally, physically, emotionally, and sexually. How can they successfully meet the challenge? Let’s consider what it truly means to be a good sub.

What a submissive isn’t

First and foremost, a sub is not a doormat. They have feelings and needs and so they shouldn’t serve apathetically or reluctantly. A real Dom wouldn’t want a doormat anyway. They want someone who truly desires to be owned. Being a sub also isn’t consenting to being abused. If you are a sub, be very careful not to give your submission to just anyone. True submission has to be earned first. There are many bad Doms out there, and even predators pretending to be Doms.

What is a sub?

The definition of a submissive is an obedient, compliant person who likes to give up control. They crave being used and need to serve. They are the subservient partner of a relationship and that is why “sub” is always spelled with a lowercase while “Dom” is always capital.

They strive to please their Dom in all things, not just sexually. This means that they may have to give up some of their own personal freedoms and preferences. They are obedient, and accept discipline when needed. Subs aim to conduct themselves in a respectful and modest manner at all times, recognizing that their behaviour is a direct reflection on their Dom.

Challenges to being submissive

Subs are not perfect; they will mess up from time to time. There’s also the fact that in a 24/7 relationship there are stressers like full-time jobs and children. It can be hard to work on behaviour modification and serving someone else when you are tired and pressed for time. Also a test to many is being obedient even when not in the presence of their Dom. In the beginning I would rebel a little, or try to subtly undermine my Dom’s decisions. I’ve learned that instead the best and simplest response I can give is, “Yes Mistress.” In the end it makes both of our lives so much easier.

How to be more submissive

A sub should always remember that they should be making their Dom’s life easier, not harder. Proactively thinking what the Dom needs in any given moment, and fulfilling it will bring her great pleasure. One of the greatest ways a sub can do this is sexually of course, and so submitting to any requested act is a must. They should also try to obey rules and instructions to the best of their ability, but if discipline is necessary they should take it willingly. Wearing a collar, even a discreet one in public, can help keep a sub in the slave mindset. They are property owned by someone else, and as such they are a representation of their Dom. This will cause a sub to take great pride in the health and presentation of their bodies.

True submission is not just a role, it is a way of life. Being a submissive means they are held to a higher standard, but it is all worth it. They will receive the ultimate gift of a Dom’s complete approval. ♥

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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Thinking about trying chastity? Here’s some links to start.

https://www.malechastityjournal.com/living-with-chastity/getting-a-good-fit/

http://thegrittywoman.com/beginners-guide-to-chastity/part-1-fitting-and-measuring

http://www.maturemetal.com/guide-to-measuring-your-penis-for-a-chastity-device/

http://chastitylife.com/chastity-device-sizing-guide/

https://denyingthumper.com/2015/01/05/how-to-measure-for-a-male-chastity-device/

http://malechastitynow.com/index.php?route=information/information&information_id=7

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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FLR... How To Approach...

How to approach your wife for a Female Led Relationship?

Step 1: You should be doing everything in your power to please her. Clear the table after dinner, take out the trash, vacuum the carpets,, mop the kitchen floor, etc, etc. If you are not doing these things, she will never believe that you are willing to do them just to please her. So do them. In fact, do everything you can think of to make her life easier.

Step 2: Put her in charge. That’s right, you don’t have to wait for her to agree take control, simply put her in control by doing things that place her in a position of power. For example, the next time she sits down next to you while you are watching TV, ask her what she would like to watch. Hand her the remote and say, “You pick something, Sweetheart.” When there is a decision of any kind to be made, put it in her hands. Let her make the choice. Don’t complain about her choices, either. That will only serve to defeat your overall purpose.

Step 3: When she finally asks you what is going on, tell her the truth. Tell her that you feel that she can do a better job running the house, making decisions, and that you want her to be happy. Tell her that you are putting her desires before yours because you think that’s the way it aught to be. Answer her questions as you would if you were already in an FLR. Eventually, you will be able to sit down and talk things out. That’s when you tell her what you really want…

Thanks to FemaleLedRelationship

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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A major part of many kinky dynamics is a focus on discipline. While “discipline” can be a fun part of your everyday activities, it can also mean something more specific in terms of punishment. “Punishment” differs from the general sense of discipline in that it has a specific goal to focus on that changes a submissive’s behaviour.

Many people engage in what can be called “funishment,”–punishment-type activities, like regular spankings or other forms of play, that are not meant to alter the behaviour of the submissive but rather to provide enjoyment to either/both/all parties. However, it is important to distinguish the difference between playful discipline and serious punishments. Punishments are consequences of negative actions, whether this is based on officially-written regulations or unspoken general behaviours like brattiness, defiance, or dangerous behaviours.

The idea of punishment is based largely on psychological research in the area of behaviourism. It consists of techniques that are supported by science to effectively alter the behaviour of an individual. (If you want to learn more about the research behind punishments, look up B. F. Skinner’s work in this area.)

Two types of punishments exist: positive punishments, which add undesired consequences to the behaviour, and negative punishments, which take away desired privileges.

Now, before I get into some specific ideas for punishments, there are some important key points I’d like to make. Please be sure to read all of these before deciding on a specific punishment.

Punishments do NOT negate the right to a safeword. Some people are mislead into dangerous situations by being told they cannot safeword during a punishment. This is completely untrue. All parties have a right to safeword at any time during any kind of play or punishment. Taking away the right to safeword equates to abuse, plain and simple. Don’t ever tell your partner they cannot safeword or ignore their safeword for the sake of punishment. This is not effective and is extremely harmful to your partner’s mental and/or physical well-being.

NEVER punish out of anger. Anger is never a healthy motivation for punishment. Punishments are meant for the submissive’s benefit, at the core. If the submissive’s behaviour has made the Dominant angry, they should have a cooling-off period where they can calm down, think about an appropriate punishment, and resolve the matter at a later time, after healthy discussion about what happened.

Limits are NOT to be used as punishments. Many people have activities they don’t particularly enjoy that aren’t on their limits list. Some people have specific ideas for punishments that suit them best. However, regardless of you or your partner’s experience with punishments, it needs to be understood that hard limits are not punishments. Hard limits are never to be used for punishment’s sake because “hard limit” means “I do not want to do this under any circumstance.” Using a hard limit as a punishment would be an abusive act, as hard limits come with an automatic safeword attached, since they are specificly stated as things the person does not feel comfortable with. Never, ever, threaten or use hard limits to punish a submissive.

Use healthy discretion. This one should seem obvious, but don’t follow through with punishments if rule-breaking was out of the submissive’s control. Say the submissive has a 11PM bedtime, but they recently suffered a trauma or loss and can’t sleep. Let them engage in healthy coping skills instead of punishing them for something they aren’t doing on purpose. Above all else, make safety and well-being a priority.

Make the punishment fit the crime. Punishments that are relative to the defiance are much more effective at changing the behaviour than random punishments. For example, if the submissive cums without permission, try a punishment from the “orgasm control” section. This will better reinforce the reasoning in the submissive and more effectively guide them to make better choices in the future. There are also punishments that work best for specific dynamics like for littles or pets, so be sure to read into those, below.

Aftercare is absolutely required. Like any kind of play, aftercare is required at the end of the scene. This is especially important during punishments because often times, the submissive is consumed with feelings of guilt and disappointment. After a punishment, Dominants need to give their submissives aftercare that includes a conversation about why they were punished, how proud the Dominant is for them taking the punishment so well, and that there are no negative feelings between them. The submissive should leave the punishment scene feeling forgiven for their mistakes and proud of themselves for making things right with their Dominant. Do not leave your submissive alone after a punishment without aftercare, ever! This is highly abusive and can seriously harm your partner.

Humiliation

A great way to get a submissive to stay in line is to humiliate them when they’ve done something wrong. There are several ways to go about this, depending on your dynamic and kinks, but it’s an effective and amusing way to get the message across.

Clothing Restriction

Clothing restriction can be done both domestically and in public. Restriction can be as much as not allowing any clothing (in legal or private settings), ordering a certain amount of skin be showing, or choosing a specific outfit or collar for the submissive. For shy submissives, clothing restriction can be intense. This is an especially good punishment for submissives who have said negative comments about their bodies.

Diapering

For ABDL or little submissives, this can either be a reward or a punishment. Depending on the comfort level with diapers, they can be used as a punishment that ties into humiliation. Making them relieve themselves in only the diaper for a set amount of time or wearing it around the house as their only clothing can be very humiliating for some people.

Sissification

Sissification is a kink that is most common in submissive men. It’s the act of dolling a man up like a girl and humiliating him based on his presentation as such. This can be very effective for some people but can be very problematic to others. Be careful not to use this kink as punishment with trans or gender non-conforming subs without their explicit consent, as it can very easily trigger dysphoria and cause severe emotional problems.

Public Humiliation

Public humiliation can be done in any subtle way that embarrasses a submissive without breaking any obvious laws. Some examples include making them wear an anal plug or remote-controlled vibrator to dinner, public leashing, or making them kneel at social gatherings. Work this idea into the submissive’s specific kinks and limits to be sure it’s just enough to embarrass them, without making them unbearably uncomfortable.

Orgasm Control

Orgasm control is simply that–controlling the submissive’s orgasms. Most of these types of punishments are used for submissives who break rules about orgasms, be it without permission or when they were told not to touch themselves. Controlling orgasms is an amusing way to teach the submissive who their orgasms belong to.

Edging

Edging is the act of getting your partner right to the edge of orgasm, then denying them release. This can be done multiple times, even in short amounts of time. It’s a little psychological torture, best for those who cum without permission.

Toy Restriction

For a submissive, like myself, who is accustomed to using toys during masturbation or play, toy restriction is a very effective punishment. This is especially good for submissives who have a difficult time reaching orgasm without toys, as it makes things very frustrating very quickly. An evil punishment may even combine toy restrictions with a quota of orgasms for the day that they must reach in order to get off restriction. Desperation will sink in very quickly and this lesson will be easily learned.

Forced Orgasms

Forced orgasm is another great punishment for submissives who cum without permission. It turns a great sensation into a torturous experience very quickly. This is especially great with toys like the Hitachi or a Sybian. Focus on a goal–either for number of orgasms, or a specific amount of time. An hour spent riding a Hitachi can really be the most agonizing thing for some people due to heightened sensitivity after each orgasm.

Denial

Denial is the complete opposite of forced orgasms. It’s like edging, but there is no orgasm at the end of the scene. This can be doing while using toys and not allowing the person to orgasm or it can be done by restriction orgasms or even touching oneself for a longer period of time.

Chastity

Chastity, much like denial, is the refusal of orgasms. However, with chastity, the submissive is completely unable to touch themselves, even if they wanted to. Devices for people with penises and vaginas are available to purchase online to assure your submissive is following orders properly.

Domestic Discipline

Domestic discipline includes things that can be done within the home. Some of these include behaviour modifications or restrictions. While some of these can be done outside the home, these are good examples of things for couples who live together can do for punishments.

Chores

Chores not only benefit the entire household, but they can also be an effective punishment for unruly subs. Added chores can be especially fun if you make her clean the bathroom with a toothbrush or make him do dishes with nipple clamps on. Combine with other punishments for your amusement!

Furniture Restriction

Especially fun for people into pet-play, furniture restriction involves limiting where the submissive can sit or lie down. Require that they sit on the ground instead of the couches or sleep on the floor next to the bed if they’ve been defiant.

Caging

Another good one for pets, especially. Caging can be used to make the submissive reflect on their reasons for being punished. Be sure to use a cage small enough to confine them, but still large enough so they aren’t going to hurt themselves by spending too much time in the cage.

Bedtime

A great one for littles! Bedtimes are good for college students who don’t do their homework, or easily distracted adults with work to do. Set up rules that require all obligations get done and enforce an early bedtime to be sure they are well-rested (and easily frustrated) when they don’t follow these rules.

Time-Out

Another punishment for reflection. Time-outs are good for brats and littles because it makes them analyze what they did wrong. Put them in a corner or a special “time-out chair” so they know they are being punished. Increase the time or add in other punishments if they break rules more than once.

Sensory Deprivation

Sensory deprivation is a lot like time-out, but can be used for added psychological torment. Plug the submissive’s ears or use headphones, blindfold them, bind them to a bed or chair, and completely ignore them for a set about of time. This desensitizes them and not only makes them reflect on their reasons for punishment, but makes it very uncomfortable, assuring they won’t want to end up in isolation again.

Objectification

Objectification is fun for Dominants who like their submissives in service to them during punishment. Make them kneel and become your footstool or coffee table while you watch TV or catch up on work. This is even better when you make them do it completely naked and/or in front of guests.

Dietary Restriction

If a submissive has done something against the rules, you can make them follow a strict diet. This is especially useful for those using behaviour modification to lose or gain weight. However, be careful to ensure the submissive is still getting enough nutrition. For littles, see how much they want to be a brat after you take away their dessert privilege. For pets, try making them eat out of a bowl on the floor for each meal.

Speech Restriction

For disrespectful submissives, punish them by taking away their right to a personal pronoun, making them refer to themselves as “this girl,” “Your slut,” “Master’s puppy boy,” or anything else you want to use. You can also make it a rule that they must refer to you by your Dominant title at all times, even in public. Having to remember their restrictions on speech will keep them thinking about their punishment all day.

Corporal Punishment

Corporal punishment is enforcement by physical contact. These types of punishments involve pain, which is a tricky subject for punishing. Typically, pain punishments don’t work as well to change behaviour, especially if the submissive is also a masochist. Be sure to carefully choose what kind of pain if you’re going with one of these methods.

Impact

If your submissive likes thuddy pain, use stingy pain. If they like stingy pain, use thuddy. Push their limits carefully, but make it clear this is a punishment and not for fun. Have them apologize as you strike them. Tell them why they are being punished and make it clear that they are to be good and learn from their mistakes.

Rice Kneeling

Kneeling on uncooked rice is an age-old technique that leaves painful marks. Be careful with time, as this can scar if done for long periods of time or used constantly. Be present during this to be sure the submissive can take it and listen carefully for safewords. Use this as a time out or have them recite an apology to you as you do this.

Figging

Figging is done by carving a plug out of ginger and inserting into the anus. This causes a stinging pain that ranges in intensity depending on the person. Frozen ginger is a milder form of this punishment.

Writing Assignments

Writing assignments are usually meant to bore a submissive into obedience. Whether it’s writing lines or a random homework assignment, the punishment focuses on making it undesirable for the submissive to misbehave.

Lines

Writing lines is effective if you use it reflectively. For example, for a submissive who is disrespectful, you can have him write, “I will always be polite around my Sir,” a hundred times. For a submissive who cums without permission, you can order, “I will ask permission from Mistress before I cum,” until they fill up five pages. What’s even more fun is making them be stuffed with a toy or on their knees with nipple clamps on while they write.

Apology Letter

An apology letter is a simple task meant to make the submissive think about what they have done, analyze why it was wrong, and have them apologize formally by writing it down. Have them read their letter to you our loud or crumple it up and put in their their underwear for that added perk of remembering all day that they were punished.

Essay

An essay is a good assignment for submissives who don’t seem to understand their rules. Make them come up with reasons as to why these rules are in place and write a formal essay about the reasoning and purpose of these rules. Making them analyze the fact that this is for their benefit will remind them that rules are not just there to be mean, but to guide them to healthier behaviour.

Homework

Especially fun for people with school girl or teacher fantasies, assign a random homework assignment. Ever wonder about a certain subject but never have time to actually research it? Assign a paper to your submissive about a subject of your choosing and have them report back to you–because knowledge is power! Grade their paper and reward/punish again as necessary for the quality of their work.

It’s important to remember that reinforcements are also important in addition to punishments. When your submissive follows directions, reward them. Give them a treat or praise them and thank them for being so good. If you mix positive reinforcement with punishments when necessary, they’re sure to be trained in no time!

xx SF

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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Husband Training

I assume you are here because you are interested in adopting a Female Led Relationship and are asking yourself where to start. This note is for Dominant ladies whose husbands have agreed to take a submissive role.

First of all you need to decide what you want out of the relationship. The relationship from here on in is all about you. You are taking on the Head of the Household role that a man traditionally holds. That is to say, you will make all decisions relating to the house and your lifestyle including money and how you spend your time. The Head of the Household has the right and is required to make the rules. Form here on your husband will be serve you and if you do it right will treat you like the goddess you deserve to be.

In order to be the Head of the Household there are certain qualities that are required. Generally speaking, women make great HoH as they are smarter and tougher than men. They also have the ability to multitask which, provided they are intelligent, strong and dominant they are as HoH far superior to their male counterparts.

I consider myself to be an intelligent strong woman. I know what I want and I like to be in charge. After years of putting up with poor behaviour from my husband that left me feeling somewhere between neglected and amazed at my husband’s stupidity, something had to change. This is when I found the concept of a Female Led Relationship (FLR). I realised that if what I read was true, I could turn my husband into a considerate, loving and attentive husband who places my needs above all others. It also turns out that I love being in control and being able to dominate my husband.

It has taken a lot of work to get here, but now we are here, the results are amazing. Your husband will be grateful and willing to attend to your every wim. Here’s what you need to do. Please don’t confuse my submissive husband with a weak man, he is a gladiator in the boardroom managing hundreds of people. submissive men who wish to be dominated by their wife are actually immensely strong. It takes a great deal of self-control and will to become a subservient man.

First of all decide what YOU want and how in an ideal world you would like your husband to act. Guess what, if you do this right it is about to become an ideal world! All you need to do is devote around 5 to 10 minutes a day closely monitoring your husband and the results will be AMAZING. I find being Dominant both enjoyable and sexually gratifying. I am sure if you are genuinely a Dominant person you will too.

Let me explain what I mean. I have no interest in competing with his work or his friends. I want him to put my needs above all others, take care of our family (including himself) and sexually satisfy me. Since starting I have gradually been passing him all of the errands and chores which I dislike, and he has gratefully taking them. He now shops, cooks and cleans for the family. And, as a by-product of having changed his ways, he has lost stones in weight.

You see some very complicated systems where women produce contracts they have their husbands sign setting out various rules that must be obeyed. I am sure it works for them, but I think it’s a complicated way of going about things. I instead I suggest you start off by setting a short list of things your husband is prohibited from doing unless it is specifically authorised by you. I demand from my sub:

No masturbation (this is very important as it focuses him. Once he orgasms he loses focus for 24-48 hours. Also, it is for me to decide when he is allowed, not him).

Never raise his voice to you and certainly no back talking or arguing with you.

No spending above a daily limit of say $5-10 without permission

No drinking unless given permission

Strict curfew

As I say you will need to decide what works for you need to decide but let me outline my setup.

Most mornings before we leave to get the kids to school and hubby goes to work etc, I have him kneel before me and I give him his instructions for the day. I tell him what I expect of him. These instructions may be errands I want him to run, pick up groceries or laundry that needs to be done. I may tell him that I want a foot massage that night or that I will be spanking him if he is due one. If he has neglected me or has otherwise disappointed me, I will lecture him during this time. At the end of the instructions and/or lecture I will ask him to confirm he understands and he will thank me.

You need to decide how you are going to address your husband. You need to differentiate a normal two-way conversation between husband and wife. These sessions are not conversations, this is the Dominant HoH addressing the submissive or sub for short. You are telling him how his behaviour has disappointed you or how you would like him to act in the future or what he will do that day to serve you. Remember, is not a conversation he is not to speak unless you ask him a question. I choose to have my husband kneel on the floor whilst I remain standing, this is a sign of subservience and respect. You could place a chair in the centre of the room which he sits on whilst you remain standing. It is important that you remain standing so that you are at a higher level to him as you are addressing him as he is superior. At the end of each lecture or instruction makes sure he thanks you for guiding him. If he doesn’t graciously thank you, he will deserve a lower end punishment. I will come onto this shortly.

I digress slightly, I am sure you will by now have noticed that Dominant is with a capital D as a sign of respect and the submissive is with a small s. I now write my husband’s name (apart from on official documents obviously) in lowercase as a silent reminder of his subservience. Whilst on the subject of names, the submissive is usually expected to refer to the Dominant as Mistress, Madam or M’am. However, as we practice our FLR privately this is not really practical and I therefore only expect him to address me as Madam when he is kneeling, being punished or we are in bed. When we are alone he now uses Madam as a sign of respect and I think this is a nice touch. You will need to instruct your husband how is to address you and when. I recommend you do insist on your husband addressing you formally at least in private as the respect is an important part of the dynamic.

Anyway, back our setup. My husband finishes work at around 6pm and it takes him approximately 30 minutes to drive home from work. I therefore insist he is home at no later than 6:45 pm unless I have allowed him to stay out later. Sometimes it is pre-agreed that he may have a night out with his buddies or sometimes he might SMS me during the day to ask for permission. Often I agree, but sometimes for no particular reason I just say no. Is he pleased about it, well of course not, but I am asserting my rights as the HoH and showing my Dominance over him. It goes without saying that he still thanks me for considering his request. This curfew is to be respected regardless of the reason, there is no excuse whatsoever. Bad traffic, is ‘too bad’, he should have left earlier and he will still pay the price. I also don’t care if he has to work late he will still receive the full force of my discipline if he is late. Strangely enough he doesn’t seem to care so much about the ‘so urgent work that could not wait’ before, now that he knows he will pay the price for staying late. The key to making this work and a happy submissive is zero tolerance.

My husband has a weekly allowance of $50 which I give to him in cash as pocket money and he is free to spend it as he pleases. Beyond this he is not allowed to spend a single cent or use an ATM or credit card unless I have specifically agreed. I ask him each evening how much has spent and check all the bank statements as they arrive. Ideally, I would have him give me all the money so that I could hold it, but on a practical level he needs access. After all, how could he pick up groceries every day without $$$!

Now my husband likes to drink. There is nothing he like more that meeting his buddies at the bar to drink and watch sports. Whilst that works for him, it does nothing for me. So, I have entirely banned hard liquor as it makes him drunk and argumentative, but I do still allow him to drink beers and wine. But, I have limited him to one drink a day unless I specifically authorise more. When giving him permission to drink I will almost always set a limit. I do always insist on him bringing a copy of his bar tab home with him so that I can count the number of beers. It does not escape me that if I was to implement the Dom/sub dynamic to the full extent, then he would not be allowed out at all he would be at home cleaning or doing laundry etc. But I love my husband and want him to be happy too, this makes me happy, so I still let him go out but in my terms.

Every evening I will question my husband on whether he has spent money and if so ask for the receipts, whether he has jacked off, how if he has been drinking and the quantity and ask him to update me on any errands he was to run. Depending on his responses I will either praise him or dish out an immediate punishment. Sometimes, this can only be a discreet interim punishment as the kids are around or we have guests, but I advise him of what he will be getting in the days to come. If you do defer a punishment it is imperative that you do deliver, as failure to do so will send you right off track.

As I say above it is important that he does not masturbate. But, all men masturbate unless you monitor them closely. If I find out that he has jacked off without permission he is punished (relatively harshly) and if it happens again within say a few weeks then he goes into his chastity cage for at least a week, which he hates. They are pretty uncomfortable things and prevent him from weeing without sitting down, but too bad if he can’t be trusted not to play with it, it gets locked away.

In the early days, my husband was breaking the rules and making inadvertent slip ups that earnt him regular punishments. If I had to put a number on it I would say 3 or more times a week, but two years on they are more like once or twice a month. He probably gets more Dominance spankings than punishment ones now. Occasionally he still has bad runs, but don’t worry he learns the error of his ways! Actually, he recently had one of the most severe ever as I caught him DUI. On the other hand I have also made mistakes in letting things slide and I promise you as if magic all the rules start being broken.

So you have set out the rules and you expect him to follow them. Will he? Of course not, well not at first anyway. You will need to enforce these rules. I know I am labouring the point now, but you must remember NEVER let anything slide. Not one little thing, not ever. If you do, you are wasting your time and his, this will fail. If you ignore an infraction your darling husband will take that as a message that whatever he has done is acceptable and you are ok with it. If he steps out of line he must be punished. As Head of the Household this is now your responsibility to deliver swift justice.

I am sure this is all quite alien to you, so I will try and guide you as best I can. In order to do this you will need to get some tools to work with, simply a slap on the butt will not do the trick. In fact that is more likely to turn him on than discourage him from repeating the offence. The punishments must be suitably unpleasant in order to deter him for doing it again.

In order to get you started I suggest getting some English school canes, a large heavy as you can find hardwood paddle, a long handled bath scrubber and a heavy hairbrush again heavy as you can find. You can task your husband with getting these things together for you. You will also need bars of soap and liquid soap. Now let me explain…

When it comes to punishing your husband, the punishment will need to fit the crime, that is to say the more his actions displease or upset you the more severe the punishment. Repeat infractions should receive relatively serious punishment. If you find your husband is repeating the same undesirable behaviour in a relatively short period of time, I would suggest you have not done your job properly the first time.

First of all physical punishment. You are going to need to use your discretion as to the severity and intensity of the punishment. Your instinct will be to go light as you don’t want to seriously hurt him and he will be making his discomfort known and quite possibly at high volume. However, men are not easily hurt and can take a lot, the thrashing you give should leave bruising that last for days if not a week. Don’t be afraid to do it again the same or next day if it apparent you have not done enough. It is your prerogative. For some serious infractions I have been known to thrash him several days in a row on his already bruised butt. If afterwards he is not in discomfort for at least 48 hours and there is not much bruising then you have gone too light. If you feel tired stop and have him stand in the corner with his hands on his head until you are ready to resume.

The art of a punishment spanking is to administer a sound spanking to the point you are absolutely sure he is in distress, he may be sweating, breathing heavily and possibly even crying. If you can get him to cry you are doing it right. The level is going to vary from person to person and vary depending on the implement being used, but for my husband is usually around 100 or so swats with the hairbush or 50 with the bath scrubber (much nastier). His butt cheeks should be hot and scarlet red with a matt white finish and should be starting to bruise. If not carry on. When I have been really angry I given hundreds of swats. He will beg you to stop, you simply tell him he should have thought about stopping when he was doing whatever it was he is now being punished for and carry on. You can’t do any serious damage to his butt, so better to go too far than too light. Once you are satisfied he has been properly spanked you move the next stage. This is NOT the point you stop, you have just entered the ‘punishment zone’ every stroke will be unbearable and that is precisely the point. Everything you have done up until now has been bearable, in other words no harm done. Now is the time to have him thank you for the spanking and you deliver your lecture and tell him how disappointed you are etc etc. Next you bring out the cane or the paddle and give him a good number of strokes which he should be counting and thanking you for. One, thank you Madam. Two, thank you Madam and so on.

Again, you will need to decide how many strokes of the cane or swats of the paddle you are going to give. The English who are the masters of the cane administer 12 at full force. I would suggest this as a minimum and for serious or repeat infractions I would go for several sets of 12 making him stand in the corner in between sets. If you try and go higher than 12 at a time he will just move and shout. It is much better to deliver more over a staggered period of time. The DUI incident that I mentioned above resulted in a severe spanking and 72 cane strokes given over an hour at 10 minute intervals. With a set of paddle swats to finish up. I am relatively confident there will be no further DUI in the future.

I am not going to go into the technique of using the cane or paddle there is plenty of advice and videos online. But I will just highlight the importance of using all he force you can muster and that you must well cover the bottom two thirds of his butt and the back of his thighs in order to ensure discomfort when sitting and walking.

You are likely to come up against a number of issues such as how to keep him in position and not screaming so loud the neighbours two blocks down can hear him. As for the first you must order him to stay in position and if he moves take the stroke or swat again and again if necessary. After the third time have him in the corner to recover and then start from the beginning. You can also tie him down, but I have never needed to do this. As for the screaming, you can invest in a gag (I only use it for serious correction) but as long as you pace the strokes or swats he should be able to remain relatively quiet. If he screams repeat the stroke – he will soon learn.

Moving on from the physical punishment I strongly recommend you back each punishment up with a non- physical punishment, here are some that I have used to get you started:

1. Cancelling a social engagement, he is looking forward to.

2. Grounding.

3. Doing tasks or jobs that he does not like.

4. Taking his SUV away and making him walk downtown to work and back all week. This is one of my favourites as it is tiring and makes him think about what he has done all week.

5. Dropping him several miles outside town and making him walk home.

6. Making him sit on the floor in the garage or bathroom for x hours

7. Corner time. This is another one of my favourites.

8. Writing lines.

9. Withhold orgasms for months, but this is a bit limited as I usually only let him have one every four or five weeks. Conversely, I like to have him get me off at least three times a week. His frustration and my power over him really gets me hot.

10. Ban certain foods or drink for x days or weeks. If I use this, I allow him to drink only water and the eat plain cooked rice all week.

Back in my world. Despite my husband wanting me to be Dominant and in charge he still continued to argue with me along the way into the relationship. This is something you need to have ZERO tolerance for and nip in the bud very early on. Probably the very first lecture you need to deliver to your husband is about talking back arguing swearing at you, including tutting sighing etc. Tell him that you will give him one chance and if he continues he will be punished. So in practice, as soon as your husband begins to argue, Hold up your finger and say STOP (if it possible). If he continues you must deliver a punishment.

This is where the soap come in. Arguing or disrespect = mouth soaping. This is unequivocal. Mouth soaping is by far the most effective way of discouraging disrespect as it links the bad mouth to the punishment. You should combine this with either a physical or non physical punishment.

Ok, here’s how. You will need a soap box with a little water in the bottom so that the bottom of the soap is mushy. Take the moistened bar of soap and press it deeply into his mouth and instruct him to bite. Tell him you want to see the teeth marks in the soap. Alternatively, squeeze a dollop of hand wash and make him hold it until you give him permission to spit it out. Roughly a couple of minutes or so will be more than sufficient. The taste is absolutely disgusting, and he will learn to do everything he can to avoid it. It is also silent so it’s easy to implement even when the kids are at home or you have visitors. However, you will find you will have to implement this quite a lot to start with as arguing will come almost as second nature to him. Even if he catches himself and apologises, you still carry out the punishment. Remember, zero tolerance policy to back talk. The beauty of this is if you are out you can have him go to the restroom where there is liquid soap, which he puts in his mouth and sits in a stall for x minutes or until you SMS him to say he can spit it out.

As for the physical punishment, you will need to use your discretion as to the level of argument and also consider whether or not he raised his voice. If he raised his voice and shouted at you the physical punishment should be severe. At the lower end of the scale I would probably have him hold out each hand and I would land the bath scrubber say 5 times on each hand which enough to sting like hell for an hour or two and hopefully bruise. Don’t go to town on the hands as you could do some damage if you over do it. Middle of the road a good butt spanking 100-500 with a heavy brush of 50-100 with the bath scrubber. Top end, if he had shouted should be a full punishment spanking as outlined above and followed by paddle or cane, with soap in his mouth in the corner between sets.

Before I go, I must just touch upon dominance or maintenance spankings. These are given for no reason at all and are given just to show that you can. These are to assert your role as the Dominant and should be of a lesser scale than a punishment spanking, but still painful. I usually give my husband one every week or so and sometimes use these to try out new implements, either from the shop or that can be found around the home. I find it fun to tell my husband in the morning instruction to find an implement in the house that day that I will spank him with that night. We have truly used all manner of things and it is exciting and shakes things up a bit. I now enjoy giving out spankings, the power is a real aphrodisiac to me so I almost always have him get me off afterwards. After either type of spanking he cannot be more compliant or eager to please.

So just like me, you too can if you follow my lead be an empowered Dominant Head of the Household and have a delightful submissive husband who will truly enjoy doing whatever you ask of him. Just think about it no more grocery shopping, cleaning or laundry as your husband ‘your sub’ will be doing it for you. Two years in and we have never been happier.

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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Why Chastity?

Before listing some key reasons, let’s emphasize that chastity encompasses more than just caging a penis. Submissive men with great self-control can be perfectly chaste through obedience alone, a very impressive feat. Dominant men may also prefer a sub with an unusually small penis to have it fully visible. So with both options (caging and pure obedience) in mind, here goes:

Ownership: It reflects someone’s ownership over your body. He decides when it’s right for you to climax. Your orgasms are secondary. It is about the fact that you have ceded control over them to the man who owns your body. He can decide to have you beat off on a whim, or deny it for discipline.

Arousal: Chastity will make you unusually horny. Being unable to release that sexual tension makes you sexually charged. Your feelings of sexual attraction are revved up, and you become more open to new sexual experiences. Paradoxically, you feel more like a sexual person than when you were free. You are always in a state of readiness.

Realignment: Chastity leads to drastic changes in sexual behavior. Being unable to jerk off leads to exploring other forms of sexual activity, such as focusing on your ass, mouth, and nipples (and male breasts for those who have them).

Self-Control: This is particularly true when chastity is achieved through pure obedience. For those unprepared for this leap, who cannot control their own urges, a cage is like a bike with training wheels. Your key-holder can help you learn the virtues of chastity, to the point where you are eventually able to exercise full self-control. Admittedly, some may never reach that point, and may need to remain caged.

Role Clarity: You enjoy being in a relationship characterized by well-defined and contrasting roles - Dominant and submissive, top and bottom. Sublimating a defining trait of masculine identity - seeing your penis small, limp, and useless except to pee - is psychologically potent. It helps you focus on serving your obviously more masculine partner, both in and out of bed. Especially when caged, it unmistakably signals no need for reciprocation. Your penis is clearly marked as not a sexual organ, focusing your partner’s attention on your ass, mouth, and nipples.

(Inspired by an illustrated post by @chastestories, but extensively rewritten to expand the concept beyond caging)

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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Be Prepared for Chastity

For any male who thinks that they will be prepared for what happens when they consent to entering into a chastity agreement with their Goddess or partner, think again. Nothing you will do, have done, will think or imagine can prepare you for what will unfold.

So am i saying to steer clear of that momentous decision? Absolutely not!

The moment your Mistress takes ownership of your cock is exciting but nothing like the onset of the deeper feeling of being owned and denied by The Woman who chose to be your Owner with your consent. If you haven’t already looked upon Her as your Goddess you will rapidly do so by some irresistible force that binds you to Her.

You will very quickly want to do everything in your power to please Her and will go to extraordinary lengths to do so. Very soon you will worship the ground she walks on and hanker for every titbit of attention and affection that She will deign to throw your way. Just remember that whilst your Lady may appreciate this outpouring of adoration She must be allowed space to breathe and to choose when you are part of Her intentions. This is the lot of the male in chastity.

You are in this cage for a reason. It is the physical stamp that signifies that your sexual wants and needs have become secondary, nay inconsequential, so get used to it. The needs of the submissive male are outweighed by the greater power of the Female Authority who now demands and deserves all the pleasure, fulfillment, orgasms or anything else She desires. Eventually the chaste male will begin to realize that Her pleasure is your pleasure and therefore when given selflessly your efforts to please Her have their own reward.

You will find as The Lady On Top grows in confidence She will surprise you with Her demeanour and Her inventiveness though as She is now driving this relationship your place is to now follow and serve, not direct, so embrace your journey whatever it may bring. You will discover parts of your body and mind you never believed possible as together you tap this rich vein of life. In your chaste state one of your driving goals will become not to disappoint The Lady and all you have achieved under Her guidance.

When you do fail in any way you must be prepared to go through torture and pain as penance; in fact you will crave it to prove your worthiness as you will for any touch or caress, whip, cane and paddle strike, rejoicing when you have colouring or marks to display proving your worth. At the very least each punishment will likely fit the crime so you should endure these with a view to making you a better submissive.

In the same way your humiliation and embarrassment will reinforce your inferior status in your mind and make the transition to Owned property more complete. Any degradation you suffer at the hands of the Higher Female Power before you will give you such a thrill just to be in her presence.

Remember there is no greater calling than to be able to serve The Goddess of your dreams, so given the chance take it with both hands gladly behind your back.

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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Chastity Words of Encouragement

Chastity…

If Your husband/boyfriend or special gurl or sissy has asked You lock him in chastity, You may think he is asking you to do some sexually perverted, kinky, thing that You don’t understand and don’t want to understand because it is sick and perverted. The fact is, he is not sick and perverted, he just wants to have fun, sexually.

There was a time in Your marriage when sex was fun and exciting for You, too. Wasn’t there? He just wants to get that back again. He is not asking You to do anything that is difficult, or perverted. He is asking You to play a game with him. A sexual game in which You control when and how he has sex. That’s all. So give it a chance. You may be surprised at how much fun You, Yourself, can have

Chastity is an amazing fetish. Most people think it’s some kind of punishment or chore, but it isn’t. The feelings you receive from abstaining from orgasm are just sublime. Guys feel aroused right up until the point where they orgasm, then everything is reset to zero after orgasm they’re no longer turned on and in order to become even remotely aroused they have to wait again for the feelings to kick in.

Well, what if they didn’t orgasm. What if they didn’t masturbate every evening? What if they abstained from orgasms altogether? Would the feelings of arousal increase and increase? Yes. Yes they would. Which is why chastity is an immensely popular fetish.

Chastity popularity

It is such an intimate act to show trust in his partner for a man to hand over the key to his “crown jewels“ and to allow him to be locked up, to await “HER” pleasure. It is quite surprising that so many people have dabbled with the man wearing a chastity device, and they are the second most often bought sex toys after vibrators.

Chastity - A Joint Decision

For chastity to work well it has to be a joint decision. If you’re both eager to try chastity then the belt or device you choose should also appeal to your wife. It’s no good you buying an expensive belt and she hates the sight of it.

Some women find the transparency of the CB-6000, CB-6000s or the Curve nicely displays the enslaved penis, many would-be keyholders like the quality and hygiene of a stainless steel device. Other women like the thought of the traditional Florentine style belts believing they are more secure.

Others initially prefer to go for something like the Stallion Guard as a low cost device to experiment with before deciding on a more secure belt or cage. There are keyholders who like to allow and see the penis fully erect whilst it’s encased, belts and devices most suited to this concept, known as “penile negation”, include the Samurai and Caterpillar cock cages from Mr S. Neither of these 2 devices can be considered long term wear, however, they’re an ideal purchase as an additional chastity device to your collection, and allow your keyholder the opportunity to employ different techniques of teasing.

Some keyholders love these devices because they relish the sight of a fully erect, straining cock unable to escape.

Chastity and Masturbation

All men, given the ability, masturbate and way more often than most women think they do. This is something that is difficult for him to control and even more difficult to part with. Young men have an abundance of testosterone so masturbation doesn’t seem to interfere with their pursuit of young women.

However, as men grow older masturbating usually translates into the husband ignoring his wife for at least a couple days. Chastity puts a stop to the masturbation and works in many ways; it changes his mood, demeanor and libido. Most importantly it changes his desire to please you. It is not the goal for him to do the cooking or the cleaning or the laundry but you will find that it will happen, not routinely but it will happen because as he continues to build up his sexual energy that he no longer has the ability to release as he pleases he will divert that energy towards pleasing you.

Your being the source of his sexual pleasure will change his feelings, he will adore you, love you in a way that you desire and he will be eager to please you because you are, as I said, the source of his release. He will find, over time, he is happier and that will be because you’re happier. He will love the emotional boost the two of you share.

This isn’t as kinky as it sounds

If your sex life to date has been restricted to intercourse and perhaps mutual masturbation, chastity play can sound like something pretty weird. It isn’t. Nothing has to change about how you make love; what changes is when. The partner who wears the chastity belt has given the partner who has the “key” the ability to decide when sex can take place. Since most chastity devices effectively prevent masturbation, it means one partner gives the other control of all orgasms. This can be a great deal of fun for both people.

Chastity play allows you to take sex out of the bedroom in a subtle way that only the two of you will know. For example, if a woman has her male partner locked up, they can agree on “rules” he should follow, such as “he must always stand when she enters the room.” If when they are out with friends he forgets, she can smile and hold some fingers up and he will know he stays locked up that many more days until he can get release.

If you don’t think this is incredibly hot to both partners, just try it! You won’t believe how exciting a dull relationship can become overnight. Take a few minutes and use your imagination. Fun, huh?

Chastity Devices

Chastity devices have been used throughout the ages in order to prevent sexual intercourse. Classically, chastity has been forced upon someone using a belt type mechanic, but in recent times, more concealable and localized devices are able to be used in order to prevent the ability to touch and interact with sexual organs. In addition to the modern interpretation of how to perform chastity, a sexual fetish has developed. Individuals now enjoy the prospect of being locked up and unable to perform sexual activities unless the other person who’s chastised them allows it.

Chastity and Confinement for Men

Chastity for men is the most common form, with blocks of specially formed plastic being placed around the penis with a small lock attached for keeping it closed. Some male chastity devices make it impossible or highly painful to experience an erection, aiding the experience of being denied sexual pleasure. One major element of chastity is the understanding that eventually, the device will be removed. The sexual fetish is undesirable if the wearer believes that they will never be allowed to experience an orgasm again. As expected, chastity is an exchange of a power dynamic, with one person assuming the role of being in charge and the other being submissive and completely subject to the will of the other person.

Chastity for couples

Male chastity is not just for men, nor is it just for women who want to control their men. Male chastity is for couples! Both the submissive male and his partner stand to gain from incorporating male chastity into the relationship. The relationship as a whole stands a great deal to gain as well.

Taking control of one small aspect of your relationship - The sex. By utilizing a chastity device, you are taking the first step toward controlling your partner. He may or may not be keen on the idea. If this is your idea, you may have to incorporate a little tease and denial to get what you want….it will work.

If you can both agree to give male chastity a chance, then be realistic about it. Start out slow and easy. Don’t plan on more than a month or even a week for a trial period. Remember, this is just a trial period. If you don’t like it, don’t get any enjoyment from it, don’t see how it can improve your relationship, then you can always quit.

Couple chastity

If you’re in a committed relationship, but you want to really turn up the heat in your sex play, then chastity could be the answer for you. Many couples engage in chastity as a means of getting back the desire they felt in the early days of their relationship, when they couldn’t wait to have sex, and it lasted for hours not minutes. A time when they were always on each other’s mind.

Chastity is also a choice for many couples when the man has been unfaithful, or has been caught masturbating to internet porn. He may choose chastity as a way to demonstrate his commitment, reassure his partner, and enhance their relationship. This is a precious pledge for any man, and the thought of this alone can be incredibly arousing for both partners.

There is no doubt about it, chastity play results in superior sexual satisfaction! Trying to earn a release, the bottom will be much more attentive to his partner’s needs. Without being distracted by his own selfish wants, his sole focus is pleasuring his Keyholder. He will demonstrate his ability and affection to his partner, going above and beyond in the hope of an ultimate ‘release’.. Remember; the couple that plays together stays together!

Chastity and relantionship

There is no one right way to practice chastity, but most agree that a man who practices chastity is expressing profound respect for their partner and women generally. Chastity is a challenge well worth undertaking because it can help lead to a transformation of a man’s relationship with his partner. Almost every account of a chastity regimen notes that the man becomes much more attentive to the needs of his partner, serving her better both sexually and in a myriad of other ways that are pleasing to her. The many religious traditions that use chastity/abstinence as a key element of their spiritual practice and service orientation are definitely onto something..

Primary benefits of enforced male

1. It prevents him from masturbating. Male masturbation is a filthy habit. It’s addictive, selfish, and disrespectful to women. Chronic masturbation has the effect of substantially diminishing a man’s natural sexual desire for his wife of girlfriend. It unfortunately teaches him that his orgasm is primary, and hers is secondary.

2. Because he can’t even get an erection without her permission, it instantly changes the dynamics of the relationship.

3. It keeps his sexual focus and energy on his wife or girlfriend.

4. It will substantially increase his desire to orally service his wife or girlfriend.

5. If he’s never been an ass-eater, after having his penis locked up for a few weeks, he will be.

6. It serves as a constant reminder to him of her authority.

7. Because it makes his orgasms entirely dependent on her generosity, it positively incentives him to honor her, respect her, and motivates him to please.

8. It gives him the time and opportunity to substantially improve and perfect his oral skills.

9. It reinforces the idea that pussy is a precious gift that must be earned, and is to be savored and appreciated on those rare occasions when he does get it.

10. It teaches him that sexual activity with his wife or girlfriend doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with his penis.

11. It deepens his submission to her, and will cause him to worship the ground she walks on.

12. It will significantly improve his attitude, and make him more generous, caring, kind, respectful, and loving. It will help soften the sharper edges of his me-first masculinity. It will make him more of a listener than a talker.

13. It helps prepares him for the eventuality of anal penetration, and getting the strap-on. Because his penis isn’t being sexually stimulated, it has the effect of gradually turning other parts of his body into erogenous zones, particularly his anus and his prostate. With patience and persistence, he can be trained to orgasm from stimulation in that region via your finger, or the strap-on.

14. If his orgasms are consistently controlled and severely restricted, he will eventually get to the point where he will do just about anything to cum. You’ll be amazed by what he’ll do for you.

Chastity - power to the woman

This voluntary act in which the man shows his trust and hands over the key to his most precious possessions to her who will then decide when he is to be released. This is an action which gives enormous power to the woman in a relationship, or the supervisor on our course and it is a gift from him to her.

It is a sexual act which frees him from the ability to pleasure himself and frees him to learn how to please his partner and thus be allowed pleasure himself.

It sounds from this description a strange and “kinky “activity, but surprisingly the approach has wide acceptance as a method to improve male performance and pleasure.

The Mental Game of Chastity

The power exchange exists in the realm of the minds so to the submissive male, being denied can provide him with more mental pleasure and more mental fulfillment than a physical orgasm.

The aroused and denied male will spend more time in subspace and thus his mind will be on a mental sphere where the female rules supreme in his life and he is much more eager to serve the female.

The mental stimulation should touch a man’s psychological triggers, which will stimulate him sexually. It is that mental stimulation that causes an intense power exchange and that can make sex more pleasurable for the woman both physically and mentally while at the same time fulfilling the male need to be dominated.

Chastity and BDSM

Chastity is a fantastic pawn in the BDSM game. It is a great tool for tease and denial, and can be implemented as an incredibly effective punishment/reward scheme. Dominants that have never fully engaged in chastity play, will have almost certainly at some point employed a ‘permission to cum?’ policy. So, what’s the difference? Well chastity play takes this concept one step further and gives the Key Holder full control over their slave’s orgasms. Many people who love to engage in BDSM have not yet discovered the joys of chastity

Locked in Chastity for BDSM

Key Holder is a term used to describe the dominant woman in a male chastity agreement. Many couples are into BDSM and male chastity is one of the many methods that these women use to dominate their men. Some men are more turned on the more they are ordered around.

The woman will tease the man while he has a male chastity device on and she is the only one who has the key to open it and award him with a release. Discuss it with your partner in detail and decide if you want your chastity to be long term or short term.

If you are just starting out, you should ease into it before you commit to being locked in. If you enter into it before you are ready it will likely prolong the process.

“be careful what you wish for”

There is an old saying among those wives who adopted a chastity lifestyle because their husbands encouraged them…”be careful what you wish for”.

If some of the husbands were given a choice to go back to their old ways they would, but none of the wives would.

Deep down the caged men are happier because they wanted to be sexually controlled by their wives and now they are. Their new reality is often much different than their original fantasy because it is now your fantasy not his.

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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Hello dear followers, I have been getting a lot of requests to share with you the slavery contract celebrated between me and my lovely ”SLUT” I do not claim ownership of this format or it’s set of rules as I redacted my contract based on examples that I found on the internet with similar ideas to mine of what a Master/slave relationship should be like. From what I found online some of the rules are modified to my liking, others where completely removed as they did not fit my relationship and lifestyle and I even added a few of my very own. I happily share it with you now and to all those who asked for it on the blog I hope it is what you have been looking for.

Cheers!

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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BDSM Links And Resources

I thought I would update the list of BDSM links and resources I posted a while ago, as some links were no longer working and I had several new ones to add, including a list of books. These should be particularly helpful to those who are new to BDSM and looking to explore D/s relationships, as the best way to go about that is to first read everything you can and then read even more! Not only will this allow you to educate yourself, help keep you safe and avoid any potential mistakes or regrets, but also the more you understand something, the less intimidating it will seem.

If you have anything to add, please don’t hesitate to let me know and I will update this list, in particular if there any books that a submissive might find helpful or informative, as most of the books I have read or included are intended for Dominants.

Note: For the sake of consistency and readability, I have used capitals throughout this document and have not used lower case when referring to submissives or slaves.

Websites:

Babygirls ‘n’ Daddy Doms: Website dedicated to littles, babygirls and Daddy Doms, with a lot of useful information on the subject.

Collarme: A free BDSM dating website and community, that is probably the most popular and a better option than the commercial alternatives.

DS Arts: Academy of DS Arts, fairly self explanatory.

Evil Monk: Ambrosio’s BDSM Website, featuring many useful articles.

Fetlife: An online BDSM community that I would highly recommend and which is perhaps best described as Facebook for the kinky, allowing users to create a profile, publish photos or writing and join interest groups where you can ask questions.

Kink Academy: An online resource with many educational and instructional videos on various aspects of BDSM, although users must pay a small fee to access all of the content.

Submissive Guide: As the name suggests, this is an online resource for submissives.

The Iron Gate: A general BDSM online resource, with many aticles, essays and even stories on the subject.

Dating and Relationships:

10 Principles For Healthy 24/7 D/s And M/s (Source: sexgeek.wordpress.com)

Difference of Dynamics in BDSM (Source: the-little-kitten.tumblr.com)

Finding Your Dominant (Source: asubmissivesjourney.com)

How To Find A Partner (Source: Jack Rinella / leathernews.com)

Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 1 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 2 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Initiating a Discussion About BDSM Interest with a Vanilla Partner Part 3 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

So You Want Your Boyfriend To Dominate You (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)

So Your Girlfriend Wants You To Dominate Her (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)

The Unfortunate But Common Misconceptions About DD/lg Relationships (Source: a-lolitas-life.tumblr.com)

Play:

Consent Is Mandatory And Non-Negotiable (Source: fortheloveofasub.tumblr.com)

Food Play (Source: bdsmsadomasochism.tumblr.com)

How (and Why) To Go Down On Your Submissive (Source: domwithpen.tumblr.com)

Initial Steps Into Orgasm on Command Training (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Rules and Tasks for Building Confidence (Source: themostdangerousplaything.tumblr.com)

Tools of Consent in BDSM (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Training in D/s - Why? (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)

Training in D/s - How? (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)

Training in D/s - Thoughts And Concerns (Source: her-master.tumblr.com)

Wax Play (Source: bdsmsadomasochism.tumblr.com)

Safety:

Basics Of Safe, Sane And Consensual Power Exchange (Source: Molly Devon / the-iron-gate.com)

Common Sense (Source: Sean R. Powell / the-iron-gate.com)

Emotional Safety (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Offline/Online BDSM Safety Rules (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Ouch Is Not A Safe Word: Safe Words, Limits, and Scene Protocol (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Rules For Meeting Strangers (Source: Jack Rinella / leathernews.com)

Safewords and Safesigns 101 (Source: kinkology.tumblr.com)

S.S.C. VS R.A.C.K. (Source: Justin Medlin / the-iron-gate.com)

Checklists, Communication and Negotiation:

BDSM Play Partner Check List (Source: Sovereign House / the-iron-gate.com)

BDSM Scene Negotiations (Source: daddyvinnie.tumblr.com)

Can I Get That In Writing: Basics of Negotiations (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Communication (Source: submissivesupportgroup.tumblr.com)

If I Ever See Another Checklist I Will Scream: An Extremely Thorough Play Checklist (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Negotiation Forms (Source: Jay Wiseman, SM 101: A Realistic Introduction / greenerypress.com)

What Are Negotiations Good For? (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Sub Drop and Aftercare:

Aftercare for submissives (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Aftercare for Dominants (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Aftercare for Switches (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Emergency Self-Administered Aftercare (Source: Mistress Abode / brairthornblog.wordpress.com)

Sub Drop (Source: David Williams / subshelpingsubs.tripod.com)

Sub Drop and Aftercare (Source: desires-of-a-domimant-man.tumblr.com)

Dominance and Dominants:

A Dominant is NOT… (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Advice to a Novice Dom (Source: Washington Sexuality University / the-iron-gate.com)

Advice to a Novice Dominant (Source: cherhatton.tumblr.com)

An Open Letter To A Novice Dom (Source: evilmonk.org)

Qualities of A Successful Dominant (Source: Polly Peachum / the-iron-gate.com)

Daddy Doms: They’re Not What You Think (Source: edenfantasys.com)

Domination for Nice Guys (Source: Franklin Veaux / the-iron-gate.com)

How To Spot A Non Dominant (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Learning To Be A Dom (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of A Predator Dom/me Part 1 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of A Predator Dom/me Part 2 (Source: submissiveguide.com)

Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts - Part One: Dominants (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

The Dominant (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

What Is A Daddy Dom? (Source: babygirlsndaddydoms.webs.com)

What Makes A Good Dominant (Source: Kim Debron / kimdebron.tripod.com)

What Should A Dominant Be (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Submission and Submissives:

10 Considerations For Inexperienced Subs (Source: fortheloveofasub.tumblr.com)

A Submissive Bill of Rights (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

A Submissive’s Creed (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

A Submissive’s Ethics (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Introduction To Submission (Source: Kim Debron / kimdebron.tripod.com)

Learning to Trust Your Instincts (Source: bewildbetruebekinkybeyou.tumblr.com)

Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts- Part 2: Submissives/Slaves (Source: the-iron-gate.com)

Some Rules For The Submissive (Source: daddylookingforhisbaby.tumblr.com)

Submissive Owner’s Manual (Source: youmadememe.tumblr.com)

Ten Tips For The Novice, Heterosexual submissive Woman (Source: Jay Wiseman / the-iron-gate.com)

Warning Signs for Submissives (Source: RC Bauer / the-iron-gate.com)

What Is A Babygirl? (Source: babygirlsndaddydoms.webs.com)

Books:

BDSM: The Naked Truth by Dr Charley Ferrer

Dear Raven and Joshua: Questions and Answers About Master/Slave Relationships by Joshua Tenpenny and Raven Kaldera

Devil in the Details I: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - The Master, The Slave, The Power by LT Morrison

Devil in the Details II: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - Mastery Refine: The Issues, The Skills by LT Morrison

Devil in the Details III: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - Sustainable Structure and Traning by LT Morrison

Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by William Brame, Gloria Brame and Jon Jacobs

Living M/s: A Book for Masters, slaves and Their Relationships by Dan and Dawn Williams

Master/slave Relations: Handbook of Theory and Practice by Robert Rubel

Master/slave Relations: Communications 401 by Robert Rubel

Master/slave Relations: Solutions 402, Living in Harmony by Robert Rubel

Protocols: A Variety of Views by Robert Rubel

Real Service by Joshua Tenpenny and Raven Kaldera

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism by Phillp Miller and Molly Devon

SM101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman

The Control Book by Peter Masters

The Loving Dominant by John and Libby Warren

The New Bottoming Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy.

The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy.

The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge by Tristan Taormino

This Curious Human Phenomenon: An Exploration of Some Uncommonly Explored Aspects of BDSM by Peter Masters

Where I Am Led: A Service Exploration Workbook by Christina Parker

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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Best Chastity Blogs

This is a list of the best tumblrs for original chastity captions. It will constantly be updated so make sure you reblog the latest version from here (Link). You are currently viewing a version updated on December 30th, 2015

Charlie Chastity ( @charliechastity )

Chastity And Servitude ( @lockedandrocked )

Chastity Fantasy Blog ( @chastityfantasyblog )

Chastity Femdom ( @chastityfemdom )

Chastity Life Captions ( @chastitylifecaptions )

Chastity Slaves obey their Mistress ( @chastity-slaves-obey )

Click the Lock ( @clickthelock )

Control ( @moneyman4u2 )

Deny Me ( @denymecaps )

Femdom. Chastity. Cuckolding. ( @cygnusx5captions )

Forced ( @bratliketread )

kinky-caps ( @kinky-caps )

Life in chastity ( @lifeinchastity )

Marfisa’s Chastity Cage Captions ( @marfisa-thor )

Mistress Jenna K ( @mistress-jenna-k )

Play, Tease, Submit ( @xxx-letsplay-xxx )

Submale Captions ( @submale-captions )

Torture and Denial ( @tortureanddenial )

unbecumming ( @nevercumming )

Vanilla Chastity ( @vanilla-chastity )

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slavetnt · 5 years ago

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Quest & Contract For a true full-time slave

Master’s Location

France – Languedoc-Roussillon – Near Montpellier

Master’s Preferences

Gear: Skinhead, Uniforms, leather, rubber, sportsgear, spandex, neoprene …

Activities: What I like best, and what the slave must like, too, are bondage, deep assplay, piercing, and hole-play of all types: My goal is to take in charge and training slave in the level it is and step by step by a strict and progressive training, transform it in a total all services slave.

Master’s Quest

I seek a real slave for full time slavery and total ownership with no restrictions. (It is a real no condition, no concession deal: only could be accepted the ones linked to slave’s actual life, but slave has to know that some weeks after its engagement, they have to be erased) This is not an easy quest. Most so-called slaves are only Cyber-slaves, Sex Players or SMPlayers. It is a real Master/slave relationship I and real slaves need and I require more than the mere fulfillment of my sexual desires.

Unclear: Slave simple servant only doesn’t satisfy Me:

Provide comfort and household, Master’s sex desires are not the only things needed and requires to become total slave.

My search is serious: my quest for a full-time slave is real. I am not interested in a slave fantasizer, who expects its « Master » to fulfill its desires and fantasies. Nor am I looking to be somebody’s loving Daddy. I want a real slave who knows that its only desire in life is to be a total slave, who knows its place and status, who knows it has some rights, but those rights are to be the best slave it can be, nothing more, nothing less.

It also knows that it will take very hard work to be that very best slave. For it’s the hardest thing to live under permanent control, to have no private life, to be fully focused on a Master’s needs.

For My part, I will accept no concession or condition when it comes to attaining My objective: a perfect slave, a subhuman being somewhere between object and animal, a creature whose only words are “Master, Yes Master!”, “Master, at your orders, Master!” & “Master, thank you, Master!” (if it is not told, it will be in slave mind that it needs to be permanent)

That said, I have no desire to force someone to assume a position for which he is not physically or mentally qualified. The slave I am looking for must be fully aware, when it applies for this post, of all that slavery entails, and be consciously willing to assume all those burdens and responsibilities, and devote itself entirely to its Master and Owner.

I am not a comedian, a faker, or a conscienceless, unscrupulous sadist. For Me, living in a Master/slave relationship is a reality, and gives life equilibrium. (I change my life, job to be in this way of life, so if slave is not able to do like its Master, change its life, how could it be a total slave if it is not able to change its simple basic habits, so how it could be for most important things in life?)

Dominating a true sub/animal/object is a great part of what I am.

What I value above all things are honesty, loyalty and integrity.

If you are true slave material, someone who wants to live in a collar, in chains, as something between object and animal, if you think you were born to be a real slave whose life can only be fulfilled by slavery, whose Master will be more important to you than family and friends, contact me.

The Master I am will take you as you are and step-by-step turn you into what you were born to be: my subhuman animal slave. All errors will ultimately be corrected: not necessarily immediately, but always eventually, until I achieve what I want.

[I own and train slaves since the age of 20yo for My service of for some Masters, so, I am interested in engaging in dialogues with slaves or other Masters, which will be to the benefit of us all.

I welcome exchanges of experiences with other slaves or Masters: I do not know all techniques and appreciate to know others Masters or slaves experiences for great exchanges.]

Are you qualified to be My slave?

Requirements :

• someone who truly wants to be a slave, minimum 18/20 yo. No maximum age. Some things are more important than age, such as, for example, good health, good toned shape, and knowing what it means to serve and be owned.

• someone who understands how to use and care for equipment such as leather, rubber, boots;

• someone ready to perform all slave services and accept harsh punishment for failing to do so;

• someone capable of adapting to change and meeting a new Owner’s needs in the first moments of ownership.

• someone prepared for strict control of when and what it eats, when and where it sleeps, goes to the toilet, etc.

• someone who, for best use, will keep its body totally hairless from top to toe, and will be ready to accept the sexual requirements included in the contract.

The idea of modern slavery is replete with all sorts of ideas about erotic experiences and sexual adventures. People think slavery is all about bondage, discipline (complete and very hard beast work) every day. In reality, that’s only part of it. For the most part, Master goes about His life (work, sports, leisure activities, etc.) and slave during this time prepares what Master will later want or need, then waits. The slave may wait a long, long time, both for Master to return, and for Master to use what it has prepared and during this time, it has to prepare and train it for all Master’s service could need.

All slaves must keep permanently in mind that they exist to serve their Master and to patiently wait for their Master to use them. And waiting does not seems be without nothing to do simply chained or caged.

If, on the other hand, you’re looking for slavery, sign up now and become what you are.

It is time for you to live the reality of submission and obedience. Don’t be put off by the fact that it takes time, patience, abnegation, testing, training, constant improvement to live by slave rules, because you know they are what you need.

An experienced slave will be put to immediate, maximum use.

A beginner slave will be trained step by step.

Is applicant capable of being trained to be a perfect performing slave?

Does it want to learn to become what it is : my underhuman instrument, my object/animal, my slave ?

What My slave Must Know and What I Think

Some understand the words “slave” and “slavery” differently. My mind isn’t closed to interpretations, and if the slave applicant believes it is its duty and life-fulfillment to serve Me, and has ideas on how it could best do so, it must let Me know these ideas. I will decide if the slave-applicant’s ideas will help Me get optimum service from it. I make all decisions.

The slave must never forget for a moment that it is owned, and will be used and abused at all times as I see fit.

Living a healthy life is very important and it is one of the rare Master’s duties. Slave must be in full function mode, before its Master wakes. Do I destroy my car when I need it for working?

What My slave owns

My slave owns nothing. My slave is owned; it is its Master’s property.

Once the slave is accepted by Master, and taken into Master’s home, Master pays all bills the slave may incur, whether from purchasing food, clothing, gear, etc., or from carrying out its duties.

If the slave has an outside job, it will hand over its pay to Master, who will provide for its care and well-being, now and in the future.

The slave makes no decisions about its life. It does not own itself, so cannot own its present or its future. Master makes all decisions regarding His property.

There will never be any discussion about this.

Mental Preparations for slave Applicants

Things to keep in mind :

The slave’s slavery is voluntary, and in this way different from the involuntary slavery that existed in the past. But this voluntary slavery is not a joke, and the slave must never treat it as one.

The slave knows why it is choosing slavery, so ideally should be available for 24/7/365 service, prepared to live with Master and perform all services and tasks befitting its status. Even if not yet able to do that, however, and starting only on a part time or occasional basis, the slave must obey Master at all times, whether or not in Master’s home or presence.

At first, the slave may find it difficult to accept and live every moment of the day as an object/animal, under total control; but with strict training and punishment for all infractions it will acquire the state of mind Master intends it to have.

It goes without saying, the slave should live in fear of its Master, but it should first and foremost be motivated by a desire to make its Master happy. The only avaible fear is the one about doing right or wrong service. It should never be motivated by fear of punishment or, for that matter, desire for punishment. Punishment will be meted out as required, and at times what feels like punishment may simply be Master’s pleasure. The worst punishment might be for the slave to be ignored, with no physical abuse at all. Slave has to remember that slave is at my service and not Master to slave’s physical masochist ones.

It is the slave’s work and duty, not only to behave submissively and dress at all times as Master wishes, but to immediately obey every one of Master’s whims, orders and desires and, above all, to never forget for a minute that it exists to serve and service Master, and to accept and welcome its condition as slave. (Best is to be able to plan service and anticipate Master’s needs and desires)

The slave accepts everything without conditions. Master’s interests are the only ones that matter. The slave exists to be Owned by Master.

The slave’s only responsibility is to show it is the best slave in the world !

Orientation

Once applicant has engaged itself, it will give all its time, all its life, to its Master, and have none for itself. It will exist for Him alone. Life as applicant knew it, with its various parties and pleasures, will be over: friends, family, music or films applicant might have wanted to see, kiss them all good-bye.

Our first moments together will be a test period, for defining basics and teaching the slave everything necessary for submission and work: attitudes, language, work requirements, submissive positions. How to touch Him, to cherish Him, to keep the playroom in order, to learn what applicant slave is capable of.

These things are exciting, but is applicant able to live this way more than a night, a weekend, a week, a month?

Even for real slaves, this is a difficult situation to live in. If it’s only a game or a joke for applicant, it will quickly become an impossible one to live in.

(There may be times you’d like to unlock the collar or chain you wear during one night or for some hours to show you in other way than your slave status. But you know that’s not possible: everybody already knows what you are: a slave. Everybody knows, despite everything you might do to show yourself as something else. You’re a slave.)

If you expect Me to make your dream come true, I’m not here for that. I make reality happen.

Does applicant want to live as a slave for a three months minimum?

Training

Constant training will prepare the slave for whatever Master desires.

The slave will do all things, eat, sleep, go to the toilet, exercise, etc. as Master determines. The slave will be used wherever and whenever Master decides. Once the contract has been signed, the slave may be sent to other Masters for short or long periods, which the Master will be under no obligation to inform the slave about at any time. Master will have determined with these Masters the uses and abuses to which they may put the slave. The slave will always obey other Masters as it obeys its own Master, whether or not the slave is aware of what they may have agreed upon with Him.

Master sometimes receives slaves who come for training on their holidays, or during their Owners’ holidays. Sometimes these slaves are sent to be tested; at other times they are put in My service if I request them to help with My own slave’s training. The slave will be trained with other slaves, or will have to live with others’ slaves who are under its Masters orders. I cannot accept jalous slave : jalousy is out of slavery spirit.

The slave could live plugged 24h/24, its ass spread, not only while in rubber or leather, but even under regular outdoor clothing, chosen by Master, if it’s going to work outside or doing sports. The slave will at all times assume positions and attitudes demanded by its Owner.

Even if its holes are unplugged, slave has to remember that in its mind, it wears one.

The slave must look forward to long and frequent bondage sessions.

Master may decide to exhibit or use the slave in SM places, or let other Masters do so. This may be hard at first, and requires mental training. It is Master’s decision and the slave has no choice in the matter.

The slave will remain silent at all times, except when Master demands a vocal response: “Master, Yes Master!” “Master, at your orders, Master!” & “Master, thank You, Master!”

On the other hand, should the slave conceive of things that could be done to improve Master’s life and make it happier? By so doing become itself a better slave, it may, at “time outs” and with Master’s permission—see below—submit these thoughts to Master. In that way, by showing how it can better serve, the slave become’s one of Master’s best, most useful tools, gives Master the desire to use it and keep it for a long time, and be even more conscientious with it.

Very good slaves are precious, and Master wants to keep them in His service.

If, for a period of time, due to sickness or injury, the slave is unable to meet certain physical requirements, it will do total servant service until it completely recovered. This will not mean any change in its slave status.

About the Contract

A contract will be signed between Master and the slave to define rights and duties.

This contract will not be an official document; slavery is illegal. But it will serve to center and define the relationship between Master and the slave, and establish mutual trust. Everything will be subject to change during the early training period.

If an accepted slave-applicant thinks it is already ready to serve its Master, that training period will be short.

The slave Application

The slave applicant must submit a letter of application to Master.

This application must include everything pertinent to the slave’s mental and physical state: a self description, including height, weight, hair and eye color, physical condition, etc., potential health problems (eg. allergies, breathing difficulties), and of course its reasons for wanting to live its life serving Master. The application must include several recent photos, with a minimum of one good face shot and a full body shot, so Master can gauge the slave-applicant’s possibilities and capabilities for full use and servitude.

The slave applicant must tell the Master everything about itself, all its thoughts and concerns, its limits and its capabilities for giving Master pleasure. The slave applicant must spill out its whole life for Master, so that it has no secrets from Him. (Make you totally naked: mental, mind, body and soul… In future, you always never hide something to your Master and Owner.)

Master wants and needs to know everything that goes on in its head, so He can determine how to make the slave give its best in His service, and make corrections when He believes corrections are in order.

Requirements for slavery:

• Attitudes of submission

• Accoutrements which keep the slave constantly remindful of its status, and make its status immediately apparent to others: collar, nakedness, rubber, leather, no socks, availability for all uses

• Life on all fours, on knees, in a cage, marks of ownership (brands, tattoos, piercings).

Never seet on chair, sleep in bed, be always physically and mentally on Master’s boots or feet….

• Bondage

• Hard tit/balls/arse/mouthwork.

• A love of bootlicking.

• A mouth to serve every need.

…

The slave’s Creed

The slave never questions. An order is immediately obeyed and perfectly executed!

The slave must show total respect to all who have rights to it.

The slave must perform its tasks as soon as they are assigned.

The slave has no limits except those, if any, set by its Master.

Sometimes it is the slave’s job simply to wait. The slave must learn to wait patiently, without questioning, in at attitude of humble submission, for its Master to give an order or express a need.

The slave knows that any failure of execution because of a deliberate infraction on its part will result in severe repercussions. The slave will acknowledge its errors, accept its punishment, no matter how painful, and feel no recriminations or rebelliousness later.

If the slave wants to be happy and enjoy life in its Master’s service, it will always perform its duties to the very best of its abilities, for it knows that that’s where its happiness lies.

Do you really want to become my slave ?

Do you really want to live a life of servitude?

Of full time slavery?

Do you want to serve, to obey, to live exclusively for a Master’s pleasure?

If so, you may have found that Master in Me: I will totally control your life.

Before we begin, though, be aware that training is long.

Finding the right Master who knows what he wants and how to get it out of you is the most important thing, but that’s only the beginning of the process.

The most well-trained animal object in the world knows it must learn what its Master’s needs are, first. Then it has to learn how to recognize them, to divine them, to prepare for them even before He himself may be aware he needs them.

To do that takes time, and serious training. Every Master has His own demands, and training teaches a slave to meet the demands of that particular Master.

General rules.

The following rules are basic for slave’s the training. They’re designed for all situations.

Some are intended for use in the presence of other Masters, or in places where an SM lifestyle is understood and accepted.

Remember, Master’s time is precious and time spent with His slave must be devoid of problems. Nothing is acceptable for excellent service but maximum effort.

Training can be difficult and very hard. Doing everything in its power to carry out the Master’s wishes gives the best results. Slave must embrace Master’s choices during its training with enthusiasm. Master must recognize slave’s progress, and slave must thank Master for that.

Master alone knows what is best for His slave, as regards training and performance.

During the initial training period, some blunders on slave’s part are expected and may be tolerated. After this period is over, slave will expect punished for such blunders.

The slave’s body belongs to Master. It is Master’s to decide on all changes and modifications of His property. For the slave it is an honor that Master wants to take it in charge and make it perfect: the slave will proudly wear all marks of pain or pleasure that Master has inflicted on it; the slave will beg Master to use it, and thank Master for doing so.

The slave’s first duty is to unquestioningly and unhesitatingly obey all Master’s orders.

Telling Master something, asking questions or making requests will be done under Master’s control, and at times and in ways Master designates.

The slave’s actions and attitudes must conform to given orders. All decisions are made by Master. Basic attitudes must be learned and executed faultlessly whether or not Master is watching: standing, sitting, using toilets, walking…

Master may choose to ignore the slave for hours or even days on end. This will depend on Master’s whim, or His training requirements. Sometimes the wait will be very, very long.

Required from slave: obedience, silence, patience, readiness to be used at any time, accessories, proper attitude. Everything must be done as slave has been taught to do it through training.

It is the slave’s obligation to accept all Master’s rules and any changes Master may choose to make in the future.

Master alone can judge when and how to punish failure to respect the contract. Whatever the Master’s decides, is the slave’s to do. In some cases, the punishment may be terrible. At its worst, it could consist of the Master ending the contract or giving the slave to another Master. The slave must be made well aware that the consequences for failing to respect the contract are enormous.

Rules to Memorize

The slave should be prepared to repeat these rules, with their number, any time and in any place Master demands it.

1) The slave is always to address Master with high respect.

2) Lie, untruth, falsehood are definitively prohibited: it is linked to total honnesty rules involved by Master/slave behaviour rules.

3) The slave’s position and status must be always evident. As, for example, only Master piss standing up like human; the slave sits like an animal. To stand and piss is presumptuous on the slave’s part. By sitting, the slave remembers what it is and who it is!

4) All questions requiring an answer will be preceded by “Master.“ A French-speaking slave must use “Master, vous… "When allowed to engage in conversation, the slave must use “the Master” or “He,” and “my Master,” when referring to his own Master if other Masters are present. It must refer to itself as “slave” or anything else Master tells it to call itself. The words “me” or “my” are prohibited to slaves. An English-speaking slave refers to itself as “it.”

5) A respectful request for permission must be made for any action unrelated to Master’s service and orders. The slave must give a reason for the request.

6) Master’s space is inviolate. Slave is not allowed in unauthorized areas. It must remain in the doorway or in designated places, unless it’s a question of ensuring household comfort or safety, or expressly indicated by Master. In no case should Master or those present with him be disturbed without permission.

7) The slave may not wear undergarments.

8) Masturbation and self-excitation are forbidden without permission. The slave’s body belongs to Master, who decides on its use.

9) NO privacy and private life is allowed. The slave is Master’s property and no thoughts or actions on the part of the slave or anything having to do with the slave, are allowed to be kept from Him.

10) When and where slave sleeps is regulated and determined by the Master. The slave sleeps in Master’s bed only if Master wishes it and in the way Master desires it.

11) The slave’s place is on the floor and on its knees, when not ordered to sit or lie down. The slave may not use furniture without authorization.

12) Following Master’s orders, attending to Master’s desires and performing its duties to its maximum abilities is the slave’s first priority. The the slave must learn to anticipate Master’s desires.

13) To fear punishment makes sense; to annoy Master with one’s fears of punishment is forbidden.

14) To constantly improve and forever go beyond its limits is slave’s daily aspiration. The slave’s goal is to make Master proud of it and its progress.

15) Any way Master chooses to punish slave must be accepted without complaint. All punishments are intended for the slave’s betterment.

16) The slave offers its Master its body and spirit as soon as Master makes His wishes known. Master has only to ask for something to get it.

17) Master frequently uses the slave for His pleasure, which can be painful for the slave. It is the slave’s duty to learn to accept and delight in this pain, no matter how hard it may be to bear, because it makes Master happy.

18) Master determines slave’s appearance and dress code. If this causes a problem for the slave, that’s not the Master’s concern. He has his reasons and they are not to be questioned. If Master has given no instructions, boots, rangers, paraboots or sneakers without socks are permitted in the house.

19) Master may change or modify an order at any time.

20) It is the slave’s duty to demonstrate at all times that it is concentrating on serving its Master to the best of its abilities.

21) On entering a new space, the slave falls to its knees, unless Master has told it to do otherwise. This allows the slave to prepare itself physically and mentally, and anticipate any order that might be given.

22) Master may at any time give “time outs” to slave, allowing it to express what it thinks and feels freely. It goes without saying that during these moments the slave must behave according to the conventions of language and respect it always shows toward its Master. Only failure to respect these conventions will be punishable. If slave does not want this “time outs” because for example, it thinks that it does not need this Master’s gift or after a failure, it could not accept this possibility. In this case, it needs to respect rules 5 and 6 until Master needs it again.

Permanent attitudes and authorizations:

• humility

• submission

• obedience

Slave is required:

• to give all its energy

• not to ask useless questions

• to obey orders swiftly

• to show competence

• to execute a request completely and successfully

• servility

• honesty towards Master

• devotion to Master

• gratitude to Master for trusting it

• love for the Master (this is a one way street; Master is not and will never be its buddy)

• work for the Master

A) An order must be executed without discussion, energetically, immediately and completely.

B) When orders, needs, desires are given without detailled process, slave has to follow and respect the spirit linked to slavery way for living.

C) Orders and desires must be executed flawlessly; mistakes will not be tolerated.

D) The slave must show Master its gratitude for being allowed to serve, and give its all. The privilege to serve gives slave the right to show gratitude, within allowed limits and times.

E) It is unacceptable ever to complain, discuss or hesitate over an order given. Fulfilling Master’s wishes are the slave’s only concern.

F) Master must be immediately informed once an order has been carried out, together with the results, unless the Master is otherwise occupied and cannot be disturbed or irritated.

G) slave must await all orders humbly, calmly.

H) it has to prepare and await, after the report/ratio to Master, His control of the execution complete, effective and conforms to the instructions.

I) It is unacceptable for a slave to minimize its faults in executing an order. It will be punished for that.

J) Master controls and manages slave’s life in all things: practical matters, food, sports, sex, toilet behavior. Slave makes no decisions about anything on its own, without Master’s agreement.

Slave Oath

« La seule raison d’être ce que je suis, est d’être au service du Maître et de son seul plaisir. Aucun droit, privilège, considération ne sont à attendre ; seule mon efficacité a de la valeur. Le plaisir, le confort du Maître sont ma raison et un des rares droits que j’ai. Le Maître possède en totalité mon corps, et il en use et abuse selon son bon plaisir. L’esclave n’existe que pour servir. »

“The only reason for being what i am is to serve Master and give Him pleasure. I expect no rights, privileges, or consideration. All that has value about me is my effectiveness. Living for my Master’s pleasure and well-being is my one rare right. Master owns my body, and uses and abuses it as he likes. A slave only exists to be useful."

Slave Pledge

« Maître, l’esclave devant vous, de son plein gré et sachant à quoi il s’engage, affirme qu’il est votre esclave, seule raison d’existence pour lui. Votre plaisir est le seul objectif qui me permet de vivre ce que je suis. Aucun droit, aucun privilège autre que ceux que vous pouvez octroyer, existent dans la condition acceptée par votre servant. Honorer par le service, l’obéissance, et ce grâce au corps et à l’esprit donné sans restriction permettront de vous obtenir le plaisir et le confort que vous souhaitez, quels qu’en soient vos choix. »

« Maître, aucune obligation vous est faite de justifier ou d’expliquer un ordre ou un désir, ni de donner le pourquoi de vos décisions dans tous les domaines, y compris ceux liés à la discipline et au dressage de la larve. Vous appartenant en totalité, l’acceptation de la sanction pour incapacité à assumer et assurer totalement et entièrement vos désirs et ordres vous est demandée et celle-ci me permettra d’améliorer le service afin d’assurer un meilleur usage de ce qui vous appartient. Merci de prendre en considération ma demande »

« L’esclave renonce aux droits qui lui permettent de penser pour lui-même, d’avoir des désirs de besoin et de confort pour lui-même, de contrôler son avenir et d’avoir toute initiative sur son apparence. Servir le Maître est un honneur, l’engagement pris, englobe tous les actes et pensées de la vie (look, lieux, personnes…) Le servir est le seul but. Il décide de ce qui est correct dans tous les domaines. »

« L’esclave sait qu’il vit pour obéir et travailler pour vous, mon Maître ! »

« Au lieu de dire : je veux ou je désire, dire : Maître, l’esclave vous offre… »

"Master, the slave before you, of its own free will and desire, affirms that it is your slave, and being Your slave is its sole reason for living. Your pleasure is the only goal which lets it live as it must. Your servant foregoes all rights and privileges other than those You may grant, honoring Your wishes by service and obedience, and offering its body and soul without restraint, so You may find the pleasure and comfort you seek, as you desire.”

"Master is under no obligation to justify or explain an order or a desire, or to give reasons for His decisions about anything, including the discipline and training of His larva. Totally belonging to Him, slave requests punishment for any failure to take on and fulfill His orders to His satisfaction in order to permit it to serve Him better, and for Him to get the best use out of it. Thank You, Master, for taking this request into consideration.”

"The slave promises to commit itself and obey entirely, to do what Master demands, to submit to every order and every punishment He thinks is good in these conditions which have been accepted and chosen before Him.”

“The slave renounces all rights to think for itself, all rights to its own needs and comforts, all rights to controlling its future and having any say in its appearance. To serve its Master is an honor, to commit itself to this service means to abandon every act and thought of its own (appearance, places, people). To serve its Master is its sole goal. Its Master decides what is correct in every area of life.”

“The slave knows it lives to obey and work for You, Master!”

“Instead of: I want or I desire, the slave says, ‘Master, the slave offers You…”

End of pledge

Infractions

Any infraction to the letter or the spirit of the contract will exact a penalty.

The type or the form of the penalty is the Master’s to decide. It is He who will notify the slave of the character of the penalty and unpleasent time for slave, making Master unpleased too. The slave must always accept his punishment and thank the Master for it: punishment gives the slave the opportunity to understand its deficiencies, and improve.

Modes of Behavior

The slave must be aware how to act in all different situations, determined by signals from the Master. The Master’s limits must NEVER be overstepped.

By saying the name of the mode the Master informs the slave of how to act. The slave must be constantly attuned to the desires of the Master, who may use a gesture or any other system to inform the slave of the situation.

“Private” Mode

This is generally the mode in operation when the Master and His slave are alone in the Master’s private space, or in places where people know and accept the lifestyle and relationship of the Master and his slave.

“Soft” Mode

This is generally used in public places such as bars, on evenings when the behavior, attitude, appearance and nature of the relationship between Master and slave are accepted/understood, and will be greeted by acceptance, or at least without animosity.

Soft Mode Rules

When Master doesn’t move, slave doesn’t move. Slave stands a half-step behind Master, close enough to hear all orders.

When Master moves, slave follows on the right and a half step behind, moving at the rate/rhythm and speed of its Master, so it can catch signals Master makes or hear orders. At no time does the slave walk in front of the Master, unless it’s to open a door or facilitate access to the Master.

Stance and look: The slave keeps its eyes down at all times, unless ordered to do otherwise. It never exchanges glances with anyone, even another slave. In certain circumstances, determined by Master, it may be permitted to meet master’s gaze.

This stance and look is permanent, even when Master is absent. In no case does the slave ever sit without the permission of its Master, and it remains where Master tells it to stay.

Relationship with others: the slave does not speak at any time with anyone. It never speaks first, but follows its Master’s instructions.

The Master, at His discretion, can allow a moment of “freedom of speech” but when this happens the slave follows its Master’s glance, ready to act according to another operating mode.

“Public” Mode

This mode is used in places and contexts where the relationship between Master and His slave are not accepted or understood and may shock those present. The rules that follow are intended to preserve the physical integrity of the Master/slave relationship between the two without changing its nature. These rules exist for a slave’s well-being.

The slave is discreet to the point where nobody pays attention to its Master and to it.

The order to be permanently nude, or to wear slave accoutrements, is suspended during periods of public mode, unless countermanded by the Master.

Stance and look are the same as for the “soft” mode. The Master progressively gives orders according to the situation.

Relationship with others: the slave speaks only when spoken to, and with the Master’s permission. If approached by someone, the slave must limit the conversation, but be courteous, and not aggressive. If required, the slave can assume it is on its own, and even use its name, if it has to, on the understanding that this is done only so as not to call attention to the true nature of the relationship binding it to its Master. It can call its Master by His name, and drop the word “Master,” as used in all other circumstances.

Once the Contract Has Been Signed

1) The slave will carry out all orders immediately, and without argument;

2) The slave will carry out those orders, demands, desires to the letter and in the proper spirit ;

3) The slave will understand that no errors will be tolerated

4) The slave will accomplish all orders within stipulated time limits, or faster than that ;

5) The slave will be aware what a privilege it is to follow its Master’s orders, and show its gratitude

6) The slave will NEVER, for any reason, no matter the circumstances, question an order, feel sorry for itself, or refuse to carry out an order coming from the Master.

7) The slave will immediately return to its Master on completion of an order.

8) The slave will await new orders humbly and quietly after reporting on the fulfillment of the previous order.

9) The slave will be ready to obey orders and desires at all times.

10) No failure is acceptable; any failure can be considered a lack of consideration, and is punishable.

Ten basic rules (*) :

1) The slave speaks only when spoken to, and punctuates its sentences with “Master! Yes, Master!” “Master! Thank You, Master!” “Master! at Your orders, Master!”

2) The slave obeys all orders. Questioning orders or rebelliousness are punishable offenses.

3) The slave never sits in the presence of its Master. It can be on its knees, upright, or in a position specifically assigned to it. If it had been ordered to sit or lie down, it does this on the floor, at the Master’s feet, according to the way He has established it.

4) The slave never wears undergarments or clothing other than that prescribed by the Master. If no dress-order has been given, nudity is required.

5) The slave will be shaved from head to toe and will permanently wear the accoutrements of his station as determined by the Master.

6) Going to the toilet, washing itself, eating and drinking will only be done with permission. If the Master is absent, the slave may use the toilet and drink water, but only as it has been trained to do so.

7) The slave is never allowed to touch certain parts of its body without permission, for any reason.

8) The slave owns nothing. Master owns everything.

9) The slave lives for Master. Such activities as eating, drinking, smoking, sleeping, participating in sports and having sex are managed and controlled by Master.

10) These rules of behavior must be learned by heart and slave must be ready to recite them perfectly at any time, as per the terms written and signed in this contract.

[(*) Explanations could be asked to Master during probatory period]

To the question: "Who are you?” or “what are you?"

The slave must answer:

« slave is a cocksucker, an asseater, its mouth and its asshole are holes to be filled. The slave exists to serve its Master. The slave has no rights or privileges, and deserves no consideration. Master’s pleasure is all-important and the only objective of the slave’s underhuman life. The slave exists to be useful. Master owns the slave entirely and uses its body and spirit as He wishes. The slave only exists to be useful to you! The slave’s name is… »

L’esclave est suceur de bites, bouffeur de culs, trous à remplir dont la seule raison d’être est de servir mon Master. Il n’a aucun droit, privilège, et ne demande aucune considération. Le plaisir du Master est le plus important et le seul objectif de ma vie de larve. Je suis là pour servir. Le Master me possède en totalité et fait de mon corps et de mon esprit ce qu’il désire. L’esclave n’existe que pour vous servir! L’esclave s’appelle : _________________________ »

Does slave read carefully all written, and understood all in this file? so send total and detailed application to [email protected]

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