sleepylaing

[sleepylaing]

Énouement

You are something hot on my eternally cold hands. You are the spring morning sun, while I am the fall raindrops dripping down the glass. You are something loving on my eternally cold self. You are something important on the infinitely insignificant me. You are everything, and I've never had much,

which is probably why I want you so deeply.

it's a fem!reader (disguised as a student furin) × suo. there's definitely a backstory here that hasn't been written yet and I'm not sure anyone wants it written at all. so this is just my OC and her interactions with others. let me know if you want a part two or something. and please don't take it too seriously

ch. 1 — Adronitis.

The classroom door swings open, almost flying off its hinges. Many of the students are distracted from their work and turn to hear Enomoto's booming voice. A silent Kusumi walks to his right and only a grumpy Kaji reluctantly follows.

“All right, you brats, listen up! You're going to clean up the town today, got it?”

A rumble of angry voices spreads through the classroom. “Again? But we cleaned up a few days ago,” someone says, and the rest of the class agrees.

“Shut up, you bastards! Are you men or what? I want every garbage can shining and the streets clean! Kaji will check it personally, won't he, Kaji?”, Enomoto turns to the uninvolved Ren, whose look was anything but interested. He catches his eye, stubbornly for a few seconds, then sighs hopelessly, looks around the classroom with a heavy gaze, and nods in agreement. Enomoto grins contentedly and rests his arms at his sides.

“Mop in hand and get to work! Tsugeura, Sugishita, help us with the heavy stuff, Kiryu, get the brooms, Sakura, you take care of the garbage collection, Nirei, please supervise, the rest of you help those I just named,” the vice captain says, but then his gaze glides over the students until it stops on two specific figures.

“Akashi, stop snoozing and leave Suo alone!” he shouts indignantly, and everyone hurries to turn in the direction of his stern gaze. “Just because you haven't gotten a punch for your insolence yet, doesn't mean you should! You'll soon be glued to each other. Hey, Suo, do something!”

You didn't move an inch and continued to snuggle into Suo's neck. You felt warm, comfortable and good. You didn't want to leave.

But apparently your senpais had other plans for your sweet, long-awaited sleep.

You frowned, picking up Enomoto's familiar timbre through the haze of rapidly slipping sleep. Something about cleaning, mops, and Kaji-kun again. The usual.

Your eyes are still closed. You don't want to get up. Suo's skin was soft — softer than any pillow you've ever laid on, his neck was nice to snuggle against, and he always smelled good: some kind of tea you didn't know the name of, the subtle scent of his cologne, and a little bit of shampoo. It was the perfect place to take a nap, especially when Hayato didn't seem to show his displeasure at temporarily serving as your pillow and held you almost weightlessly, allowing you to lean almost entirely against him.

“It's okay, Enomoto-senpai,” Suo says with an angelic smile as Enomoto's disgruntled look slowly starts to burn you alive. “It's just that Akashi-kun is a bit tired. Don't worry, we'll be right over. I'll personally make sure that he does all the work.”

Suo's expression definitely sounded reliable and convincing enough for the vice captain to calm down a bit and stand behind you. You snorted mentally. Of course Suo's voice would make sense against such an unreliable you. Anyway, you're grateful for the extra minutes of sleep.

Your peace doesn't last long, though.

As Tsugeura walks past you, he grabs your shoulders and tries to pull you away from Suo, whose serene smile fades for a moment. “Akashi-kun, get up now! You'll sleep through everything. I still want to compete with you in paper throwing, but I can't if you're still lying on Suo-kun like that!”

As a tough guy, obviously one of the strongest in the class, he manages to lift you up almost effortlessly, but you're not so easy either: you cling to Suo with a deadly grip and don't want to let go, and you moo long and protesting:

“Noooo... Tsugeura-chan, let go...”, sleepily, unintelligibly, you burn Suo's ear, and finally you struggle to open your eyes. The first thing you see is someone else's red lobe, but you don't dwell on it. “I promise I'll throw papers with you, just don't torture me.”

“What a drama,” Kiryu comments sarcastically as he walks past you.

“Akashi-kun always has a hard time getting up. Especially if he slept on Suo-san before,” Nirei says, thinking he's softening the situation, but in fact it's the opposite, encouraging Tsugeura to pull you down even harder.

“Hup!” he shouts, and in the next moment, you're already standing unsteadily on your feet. Your hands are still frozen in the air, clutching at the emptiness.

At this moment, Hayato finally raises his voice.

“Thank you, Tsugeura-kun, but enough,” he says, and his tone is impeccably warm as always, but you can detect a hint of irritation in it. “We'll take it from here.”

Taiga looks at him for a while, then at you. After he has decided something, he calms down and nods in agreement. “Well, I'll go then, senpais are waiting for me. Akashi-kun, I'll meet you at the dumpster.”

“Thank you Tsugeura-chan, you're such a gentleman. This is a great place to meet.”

“You know why, don't make me look ridiculous!”

“I had no idea,” you smile sweetly at him, and he, accepting the challenge, smiles back broadly as he leaves the classroom.

Suddenly, you turn around from the strange chill at the back of your neck to find a motionless Suo staring at the door. You can't remember ever seeing him stare at anyone or anything like that, but he thaws out after a few seconds anyway. The clinging gaze returns to you.

Suo's smile is infinitely gentle, but you can't help but feel that something is wrong with it.

“Shall we go?” he asks and you nod in agreement.

***

“You're more distracted than usual today,” Suo observes as you yawn again, not even bothering to cover your mouth with the palm of your hand. You've fallen behind the others, so he leans over to you and asks quietly: “Working late again, Hoshi-kun?”

You squint at him. As always, awfully smart.

You never told him that you work nights, too.

That's okay. It wasn't really a big secret. Especially from Suo.

You moo in agreement, lower your head and kick a pebble under your feet boredly. Suo's interested look eats away at your cheek like acid. He's obviously waiting for you to continue. Waiting for you to tell him more. You don't understand why he's so interested, but you give in and answer him calmly.

“I've had to work more lately, but I can't go out during the week because of school. I had to go out at night. So now I sleep when our teacher blinks, when my desk decides to be a little softer than a rock, and when you sit next to me.”

Suo's ruby eye flashes with pleasure at your last words. You don't see it. Too engrossed in the candy store sign with the announcement: 45% off Tuesdays and Thursdays. Too bad it's Friday, you mentally sigh.

“Did I satisfy your curiosity, Suo-chan?” you turn to him. You try again to understand why he was so interested, but trying to understand Hayato Suo is almost like trying to learn every language in the world in one day.

He's an enigma. But who says you're better?

“As much as it raised new questions in me.”

“Оh. Really?” you answer sarcastically. Your short ponytail had become quite disheveled during your nap, so that the blonde strands now fall over your eyes. You wrinkle your nose slightly, but keep your hands warm in your jacket pockets.

“Yeah.”

Someone's warm fingers gently touch your forehead. They tuck disheveled strands behind your ear with precise, careful movements. Hayato's fingers linger on your cheek longer than they should.

He does it quietly, naturally, and you say nothing, content to let the hair stay out of your face.

“Why do you need money so badly, Hoshi-kun?”

The question hits you like a bucket of boiling water down your throat and another bucket of ice water on your head.

“Don't all humans need it?” you laugh softly at the end. “I'm just thinking about my future, Suo-chan. I want to save for college.”

The lie falls from your lips as easily as hundreds of others before it.

The heaviness in your chest wraps itself around another layer. Another one of hundreds of others.

And even if Suo catches you at it, he doesn't say anything.

“You can tell me. I want you to know that I'll always listen to you, Hoshi-kun.”

No, I can't.

I can't tell anyone, no matter how much I want to.

“I will, Suo-chan. You don't have to worry.”

You both know that you are lying again.

Suo lets you do it, smiling brightly.

You don't want to admit — not even to yourself — that your heart trembles as you see his smile. Like he understands. Like he doesn't judge.

Like he really cares.

You find the strength to smile back weakly.

[sleepylaing]

When you go away for a week.

• Suo behaves quite naturally, and none of his friends even suspect that something is wrong. He's always smiling, always extremely calm, and his posture is perfect.

But inside of him, everything is raging. He's starving. Almost needy.

On the sixth day, Nirei, being the most attentive of their group, notices that he checks his phone more often than usual, teases Sakura with a particularly sharp intonation, and can hang out for long periods of time staring into space. At that moment, his gaze is lost, dimmed, and for a small second, a wistfulness creeps in.

Have you eaten today? Are you warmly dressed? Did you sleep well? Who did you talk to today? What made you smile? Do you miss him?

These questions are endless. They swirl in his mind like leaves in the wind for minutes at a time. He thinks of you when he washes his face with cold water in the morning, when he patrols the town with Sakura and Nirei, when he goes to lunch with them, when he stops at his favorite tea shop on the way home, and when he goes to bed.

In fact, he never seems to stop thinking about you for a second.

And, oh, how painful it is to have you so far away from him. Suo wants to see you. Hear your voice. Kiss your smile.

@HayatoSuo, 6:43 pm

I miss you.

@You, 6:43 pm

u already wrote that three minutes ago, dear

@HayatoSuo, 6:43 pm

I know, princess.

@HayatoSuo, 6:45 pm

I love you.

@You, 6:46 pm

I'll tell u in person in two days. just wait till I come over there and hug u to death

@HayatoSuo, 6:47 pm

You mean “kiss you”?

@You, 6:47 pm

u r impossible

@HayatoSuo, 6:47 pm

So what's your answer?

@You, 6:49 pm

maybe I'll think about it if you stop terrorizing my phone every minute

@HayatoSuo, 6:49 pm

Okay, princess.

@HayatoSuo, 6:49 pm

I'll do it every two.

Nirei notices the corners of Suo's lips lift slightly in a sincere smile as he stares at the screen of his phone.

***

• Sakura, on the other hand, feels lost, even if he doesn't realize it at first.

When you tell him that you'll be away for a week, he takes it calmly. He just tells you that he'll wait for you, and you kiss him goodbye, causing him to freeze and stare after you for a long time.

Nothing else.

The first few days he's a wreck. He trips over the door on his sleepy way to the bathroom, stumbles on the stairs, and almost knocks over an old lady carrying bags on his way to school. Suo jokes about his clumsiness, and then he finally comes to his senses for a while.

That same night, lying on the futon that has suddenly become particularly hard and uncomfortable, Sakura stares up at the cracked ceiling, trying to understand. He puts his right hand on his chest and tries to understand. In his mind, he thinks about your last kiss, the one he can't stop thinking about, and Haruka tries in vain to understand.

What was wrong.

For something was definitely wrong.

Something was empty. Something was missing. There wasn't enough in the chest where he pressed his cold hand. Fearful. Wrong.

There was something wrong with him today. Something was wrong when you didn't call him and say good morning. Something was wrong when he didn't hold your hand today. Something was wrong if you weren't there.

He doesn't like that. He doesn't know that feeling. Like he's dependent. Like he can't do it without you.

That's nonsense.

Haruka sighs tiredly and rolls over onto his side, closing eyes.

Maybe he should call you.

But...

It's okay. You said you'd be back in a week.

He'll wait.

***

On the sixth day, he can't take it anymore.

His finger hovers over your contact for a few minutes, then he finally presses it.

There are agonizingly long beeps during which he almost changes his mind, but he's stopped by the sound of your sleepy, calm voice:

“Yes, Sakura?”

His breath catches as he finally hears you. Some of the exorbitant, immeasurable weight is lifted from his shoulders, but his voice still trembles a little as he answers:

“Why... didn't you call?”

“Wha-”

“I missed you. I still do. Why didn't you call me this morning to wake me up? When are you coming back? You... are coming back, right?”

When he finishes, his throat is dry.

There's a faint silence. Until you finally find something to say.

“God, Sakura, I'm sorry. I miss you a lot too. It's just that it's a different time zone here and I thought it would be inconvenient for you to reply. .... I'm sorry, I should have texted you. I'll be back in two days. I think about you every day. It's very boring without you, you know.”

“I... will be waiting.”

And he will.

Something warm replaces the gray fear he felt before.

Happiness, perhaps.

[sleepylaing]

Rain, cats. You, us.

You think Sakura is like a wild cat. Bites the hand that strokes him, always running away, and incessant hissing and scratching.

It's okay. The scratches will heal, and the first petals of trust will finally bloom in their place.

The first time you see him is when you return from your part-time job. It's pouring rain, and you don't immediately notice the strange figure leaning over the ground. Unable to contain your curiosity, you step closer and a touching picture appears before you:

A cardboard box. A black umbrella covering it from the rain. Two small, tiny kittens inside - white and black. And a youthful hand, gently, almost tentatively stroking the fur of one of them.

The boy was completely soaked. But he seemed not to care at all. At the bottom of his multicolored eyes, you find a hidden tenderness.

Your hand reaches out on its own as you extend your umbrella over his head.

The black and white top immediately turns to look back at you in surprise. You freeze as those impossibly deep, blue amber eyes take in your face. The fragile tenderness melts away. In its place, wariness grows.

“What are you doing? Go. I don't need this.”

“Just copying you. Well, you look a lot like the two of them.”

“Tch.”

When you offer to take the kittens back to your place, he doesn't object. You ask his name on the way out, and he, blushing for some reason and stubbornly looking down at the floor, introduces himself glumly.

“I can take it from here,” you inform him as he sets the box on the mat in front of your door, “You're kind, Sakura-kun. You can come back here some other time if you're interested in seeing how they're doing.”

Sakura's shoulders suddenly tense, and you watch him pout and blush thickly again, muttering something to himself. It seems to be something not very friendly again.

You just smile fondly and wave goodbye.

Haruka doesn't wave back.

“Kind”.

He is not.

“Kind, kind, kind,” you say with a smile he doesn't understand.

He does not understand all of you. He doesn't understand the trick. And why you want him to come again.

“Kind, kind, kind,” you say, though it's not true at all.

It's you. You're the one being kind. You're the one who took the kittens in without a second thought.

Kind, kind, kind.

No.

“Come again,” — and by the gods, of course he never will.

Four days later, your doorbell rings.

“I brought them food.”

“How nice of you. I didn't know cats also ate ramen.”

“Shut up.”

You think Sakura is like a wild cat. Bites the hand that strokes him, always running away, and incessant hissing and scratching.

It's okay. The scratches will heal, and the first petals of trust will finally bloom in their place.

Together you decide that one of the kittens will go to live with him. Your father, returning from a business trip, has agreed to keep only one.

Even though you're already attached to the two of them, you don't mind if he lives with Haruka. You wrap him in plaid, and joke that it's your baby with him. Sakura, walking on your right hand, playfully pokes you in the side. Squinting slyly, you notice that his earlobes are flaming.

At some point on the way to his house, your hands intertwine.

“You blush sweetly.”

“Shut up.”

The heat from his ears flows over to his cheeks.

At the bottom of his pupils, you notice a once drowned tenderness that has resurfaced.

Sakura Haruka is a lonely man. Forever and ever.

Sakura Haruka is a man ignorant of love. Never giving it and never receiving it.

He doesn't know how to give it. Or how to receive it.

Maybe you can teach him.