slime-with--long-spine

[slime-with--long-spine]

*Spine follows.*

no Pain. although. Spine has. gelatinous form. malleable. might Hurt. others. don't Know.

for Spine. just uncomfortable. like. being spread. on. 5th dimensional. toast. and also. squished into. 8th dimensional. mason jar.

being Pushed. through. other realities. see Them. feel Them. is Confusing. disorientating. form Fits. wrong.

*While speaking, Spine cycles through Stick Figure, Art Nouveau, and Disney.*

*Spine has entered the shop, apparently oblivious to immediately prior proceedings.*

hello Hello. Cryptkeeper friend!

*Something is clearly wrong with Spine. That something is that Spine currently looks like a Van Gogh painting of Spine.*

Ah, hello, Spine. Are you all right? You seem a little bit different today.

[slime-with--long-spine]

*Spine seems distressed at the idea this might take a while to fix.*

you Are. curse expert. try anything. please. make. stop.

*The painting shifts. Spine is an old fashioned cartoon character.*

*Spine has entered the shop, apparently oblivious to immediately prior proceedings.*

hello Hello. Cryptkeeper friend!

*Something is clearly wrong with Spine. That something is that Spine currently looks like a Van Gogh painting of Spine.*

Ah, hello, Spine. Are you all right? You seem a little bit different today.

[slime-with--long-spine]

careful Careful.

was Thrown. in pond. still water. landed. in my. domain.

picked up. to look. was painting. of. some human. shifting. changing.

touched. touched canvas. like textures. picture changed. now Spine. is subject. now Spine. like this.

*The painting shifts again. Spine is now a Picasso.*

*Spine has entered the shop, apparently oblivious to immediately prior proceedings.*

hello Hello. Cryptkeeper friend!

*Something is clearly wrong with Spine. That something is that Spine currently looks like a Van Gogh painting of Spine.*

Ah, hello, Spine. Are you all right? You seem a little bit different today.

[slime-with--long-spine]

*Spine's form seems to ripple for a moment. When the effect clears, Spine is now rendered in cubism.*

have Something. for you. friend. curse. new Curse. you Take? please Take. please Make. go away.

*Spine presents a framed canvas on which is painted a fine portrait of Spine in cubism.*

*After a few moments, the portrait shifts and Spine's form ripples again. Now both Spine and the painting are in the style of Salvador Dalí.*

*Spine has entered the shop, apparently oblivious to immediately prior proceedings.*

hello Hello. Cryptkeeper friend!

*Something is clearly wrong with Spine. That something is that Spine currently looks like a Van Gogh painting of Spine.*

Ah, hello, Spine. Are you all right? You seem a little bit different today.

[slime-with--long-spine]

*Spine absorbs the stone. It settles somewhere in the center of Spine's form; illuminating another, much smaller stone suspended nearby.*

much Appreciated. Cryptkeeper friend. farewell Now. until. next time.

hello Hello! Cryptkeeper friend! cold. got Cold. very Fast. yes Yes. Spine froze. took. many Days. to Thaw. thawed Now. can mMve. again. you Have. dragon Organs? heart. lung. stomach. any Organ. holds. dragon Flame. need Heat. for. winter Coming. no More. frozen Slime.

Yes, many customers have this kind of problem. I can offer you a fire enchantment, or dragon heart is good for warmth, although they tend to rot.

[slime-with--long-spine]

*Spine turns quickly serious.*

good Friends. I think.

*Spine turns mischeviously mirthful once more.*

cannot Bestow. benign curses. on. not-friends! is Impolite. to strangers. and. ineffective. to enemies!

hello Hello! Cryptkeeper friend! cold. got Cold. very Fast. yes Yes. Spine froze. took. many Days. to Thaw. thawed Now. can mMve. again. you Have. dragon Organs? heart. lung. stomach. any Organ. holds. dragon Flame. need Heat. for. winter Coming. no More. frozen Slime.

Yes, many customers have this kind of problem. I can offer you a fire enchantment, or dragon heart is good for warmth, although they tend to rot.

[slime-with--long-spine]

*Spine bubbles and jiggles in what one might assume is a slime's version of laughter; although what exactly has Spine so amused is anyone's guess.*

yes Yes. very Good. thank You. Cryptkeeper friend!

hello Hello! Cryptkeeper friend! cold. got Cold. very Fast. yes Yes. Spine froze. took. many Days. to Thaw. thawed Now. can mMve. again. you Have. dragon Organs? heart. lung. stomach. any Organ. holds. dragon Flame. need Heat. for. winter Coming. no More. frozen Slime.

Yes, many customers have this kind of problem. I can offer you a fire enchantment, or dragon heart is good for warmth, although they tend to rot.

[slime-with--long-spine]

•▿°

YOU FUCKERS CANNOT SEND HOMESTUCK TO THE BONE SHOP

[slime-with--long-spine]

*Continue reading?*

hello Hello! Cryptkeeper friend! cold. got Cold. very Fast. yes Yes. Spine froze. took. many Days. to Thaw. thawed Now. can mMve. again. you Have. dragon Organs? heart. lung. stomach. any Organ. holds. dragon Flame. need Heat. for. winter Coming. no More. frozen Slime.

Yes, many customers have this kind of problem. I can offer you a fire enchantment, or dragon heart is good for warmth, although they tend to rot.

[slime-with--long-spine]

oh Oh. this Good? is Story. and. interesting find. also. probably Cursed. yes Yes. I think. ver cursed.

*From a deceptively small sack, Spine pulls a thick tome the size of a toaster oven. It glows faintly with some kind of enchantment. In lieu of a title and author, the book's leather binding is branded with a strange house symbol and the initials AH.*

*Open the cover?*

hello Hello! Cryptkeeper friend! cold. got Cold. very Fast. yes Yes. Spine froze. took. many Days. to Thaw. thawed Now. can mMve. again. you Have. dragon Organs? heart. lung. stomach. any Organ. holds. dragon Flame. need Heat. for. winter Coming. no More. frozen Slime.

Yes, many customers have this kind of problem. I can offer you a fire enchantment, or dragon heart is good for warmth, although they tend to rot.

[slime-with--long-spine]

ooh. yes Yes! this Sounds. very good! sustainable. always good. how Much?

hello Hello! Cryptkeeper friend! cold. got Cold. very Fast. yes Yes. Spine froze. took. many Days. to Thaw. thawed Now. can mMve. again. you Have. dragon Organs? heart. lung. stomach. any Organ. holds. dragon Flame. need Heat. for. winter Coming. no More. frozen Slime.

Yes, many customers have this kind of problem. I can offer you a fire enchantment, or dragon heart is good for warmth, although they tend to rot.

[slime-with--long-spine]

rot Not. an issue. once Slime. assimilate organ. it functions. as normal.

but.

how Long. fire enchantment. lasts? can Store. for summer. and have. again. next Winter?

hello Hello! Cryptkeeper friend! cold. got Cold. very Fast. yes Yes. Spine froze. took. many Days. to Thaw. thawed Now. can mMve. again. you Have. dragon Organs? heart. lung. stomach. any Organ. holds. dragon Flame. need Heat. for. winter Coming. no More. frozen Slime.

Yes, many customers have this kind of problem. I can offer you a fire enchantment, or dragon heart is good for warmth, although they tend to rot.

[slime-with--long-spine]

Trick or treat!

hello Hello!

from. Treasure Sack. I have. a Treat! for you.

*You have received a Lego piece.*

[slime-with--long-spine]

•v°

If you come to the bone shop askinf for ice crEAM I SWEAR TO GOD. NO. THIS WASN'T WHAT I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE. I'VE BEEN FORCED INTO MAKING LORE BY THE SAME PERSON WHO WANTED TO KNOW IF I SOLD BEANS OR NOT. YOU ARE A BIG BLOG I DIDN'T EXPECT YOU TO ANSWER THAT ASK PLEASE DO NOT TELL YOUR FOLLOWERS I AM AN ICE CREAM SHOP /hj

but.... do you sell beans tho??

[slime-with--long-spine]

•^°

If you come to the bone shop askinf for ice crEAM I SWEAR TO GOD. NO. THIS WASN'T WHAT I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE. I'VE BEEN FORCED INTO MAKING LORE BY THE SAME PERSON WHO WANTED TO KNOW IF I SOLD BEANS OR NOT. YOU ARE A BIG BLOG I DIDN'T EXPECT YOU TO ANSWER THAT ASK PLEASE DO NOT TELL YOUR FOLLOWERS I AM AN ICE CREAM SHOP /hj

but.... do you sell beans tho??

[slime-with--long-spine]

no No. just Happy. happy to. Share. good Soup. with friends.

Ratfrog make. best soups. Ratfrog find. best. best ingredients.

This soup. Forest Mushrooms. River Roots. and. Not-Deer Tongues. Very. good very.

*Ratfrog makes a sound not unlike a deflating balloon. Perhaps it is proud?*

yes Yes. best Ratfrog. thanking. thanking Ratfrog. thanking for. good Soup.

hello Hello. Cryptkeeper friend! very busy. busy today. I see. I see. many patron. good Good?

Under most circumstances, it would be- but at this rate, I fear I may be overrun.

But no matter- you are always welcome here! What can I get for you today?

[slime-with--long-spine]

No thing. for Spine. Spine have. gift! Ratfrog. Ratfrog make. good Soup!

*Said ratfrog is currently riding on the slime's... head? It is wearing a small harness and leash which is tied to an antler. The ratfrog seems perfectly comfortable with this development.*

*Spine retrieves a large cauldron of thick brown soup from... somewhere? It materializes nearby.*

Soup? good Soup? For all. Friend?

hello Hello. Cryptkeeper friend! very busy. busy today. I see. I see. many patron. good Good?

Under most circumstances, it would be- but at this rate, I fear I may be overrun.

But no matter- you are always welcome here! What can I get for you today?