smadeleine42

[smadeleine42]

the gods meet in the morning to decide my symptoms for the day: fatigue? of course, make it crushing when she wakes, but let it fade in a few hours. completely? no, but enough to give her hope. and leave it like that until evening? no, we can start to increase it again when she goes downstairs. what about pain? only in the forehead to start with, like a tightness she can't place. then we could give her a headache that won't go away no matter what she takes? excellent, and let's make her head tingle. with ringing in ears? naturally, but only in the silence. what if she tries to listen to music? we make her ears rattle, and she will feel too sick to continue, as if the flu has taken hold. do her eyes hurt? they are dry, and they ache when she moves them. we could make her throat hurt, like a knife digging into the side? i like it, but only when she closes her eyes, to prevent too much rest. if she tries to walk? she will grow breathless, and her heart will erupt with beating. and all that until nightfall? all that until nightfall. and should we then let her sleep? no.

[smadeleine42]

I mean surely we all grew up feeling like there was a wrongness inherently deep inside us that will endure for the rest of our lives

[smadeleine42]

There's no chronic illness handbook, so I'm just freestyling this

[smadeleine42]

outline story → ignore outline → write emotional mess → try to fix it → make new outline → ignore it again

[smadeleine42]

I am Kareman Dohan، From besieged Gaza

I record this message in the 21st century, specifically in the year 2025, fully aware and in sound mind. I hereby testify, confess, and declare that a criminal entity—ruled by violent gangs—has revived the horrors of Nazism, and has even surpassed them. For over 600 days, it has committed one of the greatest atrocities of our modern age, in a place called Gaza. They murdered our children before our men, our women before our youth. They destroyed homes, displaced families, and starved the innocent. And this brutal campaign has not stopped—not even as I speak these words. The world today counts more than 8.2 billion people, Yet not a single force has been able to stop the bloodshed, or protect the defenseless.

I call upon every free soul, every conscience still alive, Spread this message far and wide.

Speak up. Act.

Support my people. Support my family.

Let your silence not be another weapon used against us.

Silence is complicity.

Solidarity is a duty.

Donate to my family and my little boy, donation links below the post or by clicking here

Short video of 600 days of war

Donate here🌸:

GoFundMe: Click here

PayPal: Click here

Chuffed: Click here

My campaing vetted by/ @90-ghost here @gaza-evacuation-funds here My number in post 6

[smadeleine42]

✅️Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #373 )✅️

I hope you'll let me tell you a little bit about my home🇵🇸, Gaza🍉. It's a place where we're living through some very challenging times💔🥹. We're under attack from bombs, explosives, and warplanes, and we've had to endure many nights of sleeplessness. It's a difficult situation💔, but we're trying to stay positive🖤. This war has really taken a toll on us. It's destroyed our bodies, our lives, and our souls. It has been so sad to see our homes destroyed, our belongings taken from us, and our beautiful places ruined. It has also changed our situation for the worse. We were living a pretty good life, you know? Peaceful, loving, and full of life. But then, we found ourselves in a really tough spot. Hunger, fear, and terror have become our new normal. My kids and I, along with my extended family, are struggling to make ends meet. We don't have the basic necessities of life, and our living situation is pretty rough. We're in these old, falling-apart tents. It's so hard to know what to do when winter comes. We'll be soaked in the rain and wind, and I'll be at a loss as to how to keep my family safe, from the bombing and from the winter.🥹

I'm really hoping you can help me and my family to live through this awful war.💔

🥹❤️‍🩹https://gofund.me/ed6e9cb6🥹❤️‍🩹

@fancysmudges @brokenbackmountain @just-browsing1222-deactivated20 @mothblossoms @aleciosun @fluoresensitive @khizuo @lesbiandardevil @transmutationisms @schoolhater @timogsilangan @appsa @buttercuparry @sayruq @malcriada @palestinegenocide @sar-soor @akajustmerry @annoyingloudmicrowavecultist @feluka @tortiefrancis @flower-tea-fairies @tsaricides @riding-with-the-wild-hunt @visenyasdragon @belleandsaintsebastian @ear-motif @kordeliiius @brutaliakhoa @raelyn-dreams @troythecatfish @theropoda @tamarrud @4ft10tvlandfangirl @queerstudiesnatural @northgazaupdates2 @skatezophrenic @awetistic-things @camgirlpanopticon @baby-girl-aaron-dessner @nabulsi @sygol @junglejim4322 @heritageposts @chososhairbuns @palistani @dlxxv-vetted-donations @illuminated-runas @imjustheretotrytohelp

[smadeleine42]

Eugene de Blaas, A Young Woman with Veil detail, ca. 1880-1910

[smadeleine42]

!!Please don't skip🍉🇵🇸

Take a look🙏🏻💔

I'm Sameer from Gaza l I need your help if you can😭🙏🏻🙏🏻

Hello everyone

I am Samir from Gaza and I am 18 years old and this is my story

We are a family of 6 people, my father, my mother, me, my brother and two sisters.

We were living a beautiful life in peace. I was on the verge of high school and preparing myself to study medicine.———————————————————-

This has been my dream since childhood. Suddenly, the war happened😣💔 . At first, we stayed in our house and did not leave. After the bombing intensified, we decided to move to southern Gaza.

From here, the great suffering began. We started moving around southern Gaza until we finally settled in a small tent.

We began to suffer from severe diseases due to the spread of epidemics, the polluted water we drink, and the unhealthy food. In short, our lives became like hell.

Then we received the news of the burning of our house and the burning of all of my father's exhibitions.

This is our sweet home before and after 🥹💔

We lost our entire source of livelihood, so we had nothing left. Here, I decided to create a link to the GoFoundMe after a whole year of war. I hope that you will help me collect the amount so that I and my family can travel and start a new life because our lives are at risk all the time while we are in Gaza.

I hope that you will read my words With your hearts and support me and my family to start life again

Thank you very much 🙏🏻❤️

Vetted by @gazavetters , my number verified on the list is (#112)

Vetted by : @dIxxv-vetted-donations

Vetted by : @90-ghost

Vetted by : @heba-20

Vetted by : @heydreamchild

[smadeleine42]

In the heart of Gaza

, where wounds never heal, a small family refuses to surrender. Their suffering has been transformed into strength, and they have made love their homeland. ❤️‍🩹🍉

Gaza is not just a city , but an immortal spirit, even in the most difficult circumstances. Despite everything, this family dreams of a better day.🏚🔜🏠

We hope you can help us build our lost home. Simple donations make a huge difference in our lives.🌿🇵🇸

Thank you to everyone for your support🫂🥹

[smadeleine42]

Urgent Emergency!! 🚨🚨🚨

Eileen and her family have come under attack by Israeli occupation forces (the Israeli army)❗

The occupation forces are currently bombing the area with gas canisters, and it is likely that they will begin shooting or shelling at any moment! 😞💔

The family is trying to escape, but three of its members suffer from physical disabilities. Adam, her 13-year-old son, has a head condition that limits his mobility.

Ala'a, her 20-year-old daughter, is unable to use her leg due to a previous injury caused by an earlier attack by the occupation forces. 💔

As for Eileen herself, she suffers from severe back pain, which makes it very difficult for her to move. 💔

Shaimaa, her 18-year-old daughter, is doing everything she can to help the family escape. 🥹💔

Eileen’s father, , lives with them in the tent.

He is 70 years old and sustained serious injuries during the war ، He has diabetes and was injured in a nearby bombing, which resulted in damage to his chest, shoulder, and right eye. He is in dire need of urgent surgery to regain his sight in it again.

Her mother She lost her life due to lack of treatment and hunger, as she was a cancer patient. May God protect us and you.

The family urgently needs transportation to escape, but it costs around $904 USD.

The situation is extremely dangerous and sensitive! We don’t know what the occupation forces are planning, and any delay could be fatal! 💔

Please share the family’s campaign and donate if you can! 🙏🏻💔💔

90-ghost verified

[smadeleine42]

Don’t ignore this post — please, take a moment

My campaign is verified by @GazaVetters — my number is ( #598 )

✅️Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #598 )✅️

You can check the official vetted list to confirm:

My name is Abdullah, and I’m from Gaza.

My life has been turned upside down by war. I’ve lost my home, my safety, and every basic thing we often take for granted.

I’m not asking for much — just a little kindness, a little support. Even a small donation or a share could help me survive this dark time.

Please read my story here:

Thank you for not ignoring me.

✅️Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #598 )✅️

[smadeleine42]

I am Kareman Dohan، From besieged Gaza

I record this message in the 21st century, specifically in the year 2025, fully aware and in sound mind. I hereby testify, confess, and declare that a criminal entity—ruled by violent gangs—has revived the horrors of Nazism, and has even surpassed them. For over 600 days, it has committed one of the greatest atrocities of our modern age, in a place called Gaza. They murdered our children before our men, our women before our youth. They destroyed homes, displaced families, and starved the innocent. And this brutal campaign has not stopped—not even as I speak these words. The world today counts more than 8.2 billion people, Yet not a single force has been able to stop the bloodshed, or protect the defenseless.

I call upon every free soul, every conscience still alive, Spread this message far and wide.

Speak up. Act.

Support my people. Support my family.

Let your silence not be another weapon used against us.

Silence is complicity.

Solidarity is a duty.

Donate to my family and my little boy, donation links below the post or by clicking here

Short video of 600 days of war

Donate here🌸:

GoFundMe: Click here

PayPal: Click here

Chuffed: Click here

My campaing vetted by/ @90-ghost here @gaza-evacuation-funds here My number in post 6

[smadeleine42]

🌸 From One Mother’s Heart – Please Read 🌸

My name is Saja. I’m a wife, a mother, and a woman who once believed her story would be simple. I thought my days would be filled with watching my daughter grow — from her first smile to her first steps — surrounded by the small joys of everyday life.

But life had other plans.

War has returned to our home. Again. And once again, we find ourselves living under skies that never seem to rest.

There was a moment — a fragile, breathless moment — when the bombs paused and the world seemed to remember us. It gave us hope. We thought maybe, just maybe, we could start to rebuild. But now, we are back in the dark — hiding, holding on, praying.

I’m writing this not as someone seeking pity, but as a mother who has no other choice but to speak.

Imagine holding your baby in the middle of the night, not because she cried, but because the world outside roared too loud for either of you to sleep. Imagine whispering bedtime stories not to lull her into dreams, but to keep the fear from settling into her tiny bones.

This is my life.

This is my daughter’s life.

And even now — especially now — I believe in softness. I believe in kindness. Because when everything else is taken from you, hope becomes the most valuable thing you have.

Why I’m Reaching Out Our home has been damaged. Our lives changed. But through it all, my daughter wakes up every morning with a smile. She reaches for me with trust, with love, with faith that I will keep her safe.

That’s why I keep going.

I’ve launched a campaign to ask for help — not because it’s easy, but because silence is no longer an option. I am asking for support not just for me, but for my baby, and for the quiet strength of so many mothers like me who are fighting, every single day, to hold their families together.

How You Can Help: 🤍 Help us restore parts of our home so we can live with dignity 🤍 Support women and mothers in Gaza with access to care and resources 🤍 Keep the light of hope alive for a generation born in the shadows of war

💛 If you can, please support our journey here:

If you can’t give, please consider sharing. Your voice might be the reason someone else hears ours.

From My Heart to Yours Maybe our lives are worlds apart. Maybe you’ve never lived through war. But if you’ve ever held a child and wished the world could be better for them — then you understand more than you know.

I don’t want my daughter to grow up thinking the world turned away.

Please, if you’ve read this far — thank you. Thank you for seeing us. Thank you for caring. We are still here. Still hoping. Still holding on to every kind act like it’s a lifeline.

With love and endless gratitude

[smadeleine42]

your story doesn’t have to make sense right now. neither do you. just put a guy on a horse and make him sad.

[smadeleine42]

Fascinating to me that this passage:

"Instead, disease is seen as the vehicle of excess feeling. TB is the disease that makes manifest intense desire; that discloses, in spite of the reluctance of the individual, what the individual does not want to reveal. The contrast is no longer between moderate passions and excessive ones but between hidden passions and those which are brought into the open. Illness reveals desires of which the patient probably was unaware."

Was written by Susan Sontag in 1978 as a condemnation of the way society moralises and psycologises illness.

And the first doctor I saw about my chronic illness symptoms told me, "It's likely anxiety. You know, sometimes the body tells us things we aren't aware of yet." Before running a single blood test, to a patient who professed (truthfully) no ongoing anxieties other than illness. And that this is an extraordinarily common thing chronically ill patients are told.

The fact that Sontag's analysis and critique of society's views towards illness almost 50 years ago is still relevant today tells us everything we need to know about how little we have advanced in terms of attitude, despite huge leaps in medical understanding.

(Illness as Metaphor by Susan Sontag)

[smadeleine42]

Here she is (next to my pile of compression garments)

She’s old and beat up but I love her

The optometrist called my cane groovy and it made my day

[smadeleine42]