smolweylin

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HEY THIS IS IMPORTANT whats your favorite place to find drawing references?

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I've always had chronic fatigue. I remember being twelve, and an adult mentioned how I couldn't possibly know how tired they felt because adulthood brought levels of exhaustion I couldn't imagine. I thought about that for days in fear, because I couldn't remember the last time I didn't feel tired.

Eventually I came to terms with the fact that I was just tired, and I couldn't do as many things as everyone else. People called me lazy, and I knew that wasn't true, but there's only so many times you can say "I'm tired" before people think it's an excuse. I don't blame them. When a teenager does 20 hours of extracurriculars every week and only says "I'm too tired" when you ask them to do the dishes, it's natural to think it's an excuse. At some point, I started to think the same thing.

It didn't matter that I could barely sit up. It was probably all in my head, and if I really wanted to, I could do it.

When I learned the name for it, chronic fatigue, I thought wow, people that have that must be miserable, because I am always tired and I cannot imagine what it would feel like if it were worse.

Spoiler alert, if you've been tired for a decade, it's probably chronic fatigue.

Once I figured that out though, I thought of my energy as the same as everyone else's, just smaller in quantity. And that might be true for some people, but I've figured out recently that it absolutely isn't true for me.

I used to be like wow I have so much energy today I can do this whole list for sure! And then I'd do the dishes and have to lay down for 2 hours. Then I'd think I must gave misjudged that, I didn't have as much energy as I thought.

But the thing is - I did have enough energy for more tasks, I just didn't go about them properly.

With chronic fatigue, your maximum energy is obviously much smaller than the average person's. Doing the dishes for you might use up the same percentage of energy that it takes to do all the daily chores for someone else.

If someone without chronic fatigue was to do all the daily chores, they would take breaks. Because otherwise, they're sprinting a marathon for no reason and it would take way more energy than necessary. We have to do the same.

Put the cups in the dishwasher, take a break. Put the bowls in, take a break. So on and so forth. This may mean taking breaks every 2-5 minutes but afterwards, you get to not feel like you've run a marathon while carrying 4 people on your back.

Today, I had a moderate amount of energy. Under my old system of go till you drop, I probably could have done most of the dishes and wiped off the counter and then been dead to the world for the rest of the day.

Under the new system, I scooped litter boxes, cleaned out the fridge, took the trash out, cleaned the stove, and wiped off the counter and did all the dishes. And after all that, I still had it in me to make a simple dinner, unload the dishwasher, and tidy the kitchen.

It was complete and utter insanity. Just because I sat down whenever I felt myself getting more tired than I already was.

All this to say, take fucking breaks. It's time to unlearn the ceaseless productivity bullshit that capitalism has shoved down our throats. Its actively counterproductive. Just sit down. Drink some water. Rest your body when it needs to rest.

There will still be days where there is nothing to do but rest, and days where half a load of dishes is absolutely the most I can do. But this method has really helped me minimize those, which is so incredibly relieving.

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I hit a pothole (a Michigan pothole so basically a sinkhole) today and my check engine light came on. I don’t have one of those computer plugins to reset the light and I knew it was just a sensor that got knocked so I was just like “well let’s see if this works” and on the way home I swerved and hit the pothole again and the check engine light turned off

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zlibrary gone... FUCK TIKTOK FUCK BOOKTOK I hope that app burns in hell

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Imagine if there was a Littlest Pet Shop cambrian period set…

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This video somehow pinpoints my exact sense of humor

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Heyo it’s back to school time and here’s a research tip from your friendly neighborhood academic librarian.When searching for any topic on the internet just type in the word ‘libguide’ after your topic and tada like magic there will be several  beautifully curated lists of books, journals, articles, or other resources dealing with your subject. Librarians create these guides to help with folks’ informational needs, so please go find one and make a librarian happy today!!

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I'm off to fight God does anyone want anything?

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he was in the fridge!!!

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some of my favourite vídeo essays about art history:

whose migrant mother was this? the story of the native american woman who became the face of the 1930s depression (and got almost nothing for it)

bauhaus design is everywhere, but its roots are political how even a simple choice between what font to use can be a political act

edvard munch: what a cigarette means munch + tobacco = art? (yes we’re still on the topic of art as a political weapon)

art that was never finished how great masters sometimes even didn’t finish stuff. also! the history behind the colour aquamarine

fka twigs on mary magdalene (if you like asmr you’re gonna love this)

having a coke with frank ohara (technically not art history but this video is too good for me not to mention)

video postcard: woman at her toilette a quick dive into my favourite painting of woman impressionist berthe morisot

this documentary about georgia o´keeffe (that ive seen about 10 times)

david hockney on vincent van gogh on love of nature, beauty, attention, and the art of looking (essentially a mary oliver poem in interview format!!!!)

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Someone hacked the tornado siren… (Unmute !)

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Never talk to me or my 80+ tabs again

when you are done with a tab you can close it. every browser in the world has a feature that lets you open recently closed tabs. also there is browsing history. need to visit a webpage often? may i introduce you to the bookmarks feature. there’s no reason to leave your tabs open. hoarder behavior.

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I legit have a book called the book of amazing curiosities that is just full of random information from stuff like inventions, such as safety pins, to strange events, games, holidays, sayings and true crime!

it was 1849.

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Ever seen an upside down iceberg?

Now you have!

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Tintin remembers what comes after 15.