smotired

[smotired]

if you were able to vote in the us elections and didn’t, for whatever your dumbass reason, then fuck you

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if you don’t feel like getting up, try lying in bed and staring at your phone for an hour! it won’t help 👍

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i have to say it is funny that of all the reasons you shouldn't let cats roam around outside unattended the only one that outdoor cat owners care about is the possibility that someone could steal your cat and keep it inside. literally this

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honestly I hate “can you pet the dog?!?” not for any of the common reasons but because it was initially interesting as a proposition of “can you interact with the world in a way that is not within the primary mechanical loop” and that very quickly fell away to being “well now any indie developer making a game has to have a pet the dog button or they’re going to get letters”

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new pronoun strategy:

1. take the pronouns you are comfortable with:

(example: he/him and they/them)

2. create a regular expression to blend this pronoun set:

(example: he and they can both be represented with /t?hey?/ and him and them with /t?h(e|i)m/, repeat for possessives and reflexive)

3. pick other strings that are matched by these regexes and those are your new pronouns

(example: the/hem, hey/thim, etc)

if you use a lot of pronouns you can really go wild. for example if someone goes by he/she/they/it then for subjective they could go with /i?(t|s)?(he)?y?/ and go with like ishey or ty or even just the letter s. crazy stuff. and subjective is like the simplest one for that combo.

if you use any pronouns your regex is /.+/ i guess go crazy

[smotired]

lying to children is awesome (when it’s something harmless like this) because sometimes they just believe it and don’t really think about it until they’re an adult when they realize it’s not true

like you’ll be talking with friends and someone will say something and follow it up with “wait that’s not true is it” and it leads to hilarious memories

6 year old asked me why i dont like mr beast and i didnt have an answer that a small child could understand so i said he tried to eat a homeless person a long time ago

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lets settle this

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[smotired]

ugh i can’t believe i have ugh i can’t believe i have work tomorrow tomorrow

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bug haters will be like "thanks i hate it" and then show you a picture of the cutest animal you've ever seen

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had enough character development this year thank you

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Las leyes de la física son inquebrantables.

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as a reward for making Healthy Choices this week I am going to make Unhealthy Choices

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a day used to be 24hrs and cost $5 but nowadays a day only lasts 5hrs and they charge ya $20 just to live it. and you have to pay with an app

[smotired]

she got bootstrap paradoxed

my mom just had a 7cm brain tumor removed and since she's woken up she's been talking nonstop about this dream she had about going to an art gallery full of colourful paintings by a 'homosexual artist' named klimsdorf who was ethereal and wise, both young and old... at first she was convinced he was a real person but after failing to find him online she's accepted he was a figment of her subconscious mind and is now determined to bring him to life via painting his portrait herself. she's 67 and has never drawn in her life. and now this. blorbo from her tumor

[smotired]

t-...to-...toasty s'more mushrooms.....

[smotired]

sometimes thinking abt all the gaming youre gonna do later is what gets you through the workday and then you get home and do no gaming. not even a little bit of gaming