snkcracktheories - Tumblr blog

[snkcracktheories]

So this is what we learned after crack theories week:

Eldians are actually some kind of solar panels and Founding Titan is harvesting sun power from them and not just that, they are also a seperate species called Homo Kyojinus and their Founding Goddess Ymir Fritz is actually a lizard that has been cursed some time ago because she never ate any carrots once in her life. 13 year old curse can be cured with paths, if that thing really exists. Armin knows everything and planned the integrity of SnK. 

Easterners are hiding in Liberio, and they are not the only ones, Tyburs are zekeret Ackermans hiding somewhere too. Jean is also another Ackerman we were never aware of. Ymir Fritz is reincarnated her glorious blond locks to Erwin’s eyebrows and Erwin reincarnated to Armin’s eyebrows which has been grown more than his hair during 4 year timeskip, yes, Armin who is the zekeret son of Zeke Jaeger, aka known as Armin Reiss Fritz Galliard Reeves Braun Ackerman Tybur Yeager Arlert. Armin is not the only one that we can prove he is related to someone thanks to his blond locks, we also proved that Flock is a Tybur thanks to his blond locks. Ymir Fritz is not the only one that has zekeret relatives around, our Ymir may be a Jaeger, just like Bertolt Hoover Jaeger. 

Marco is alive and looking for revenge with his real family, Tyburs. Erwin is a vampire lord while Ackermans are byproducts of salmon fish. Ymir is fooling everyone by telling she is dead, and Marlowe is not acting different! Grisha jaeger’s legs are still running around in some forest in Paradis, while Paradis folks are up to different stuff, like seeking aliances with Eek Sea Nation or burying Darious Zackley to mainland or getting Annie out of crystal and more. 

Zeke is an East Sea spy and the inventor of baseball. Mikasa is a Targaryen and Tyburs are literally Jedis. Mads Mikkelsen is the solution of all our problems. SnK world is mysterious as ever but for Pixis, these doesn’t matter because he just misses Annie terribly.

And that was a write up! Thanks everyone for your efforts! THANK YOU ALL FOR JOINING!

@scout850 |  @falcon94ssy | @all-my-ships-are-snking | @perfectackeracy | @prettysassyunicorn | @whenparadisfalls | @eldian-scum | @evilsquirrelstuff | @the-not-so-dark-age | @shitpost-no-kyojin | @desertbl00m | @redbunnydragon | @filterredphan | @amateurmagic | @kyojinofbraveos

[snkcracktheories]

Tumblr, hold our beer because crack week is back! Even after learning more about the world of snk in the past year, there is still so much left to theorize about. So prepare for the week of July 31st – August 6th, and strap yourselves in for the wildest time in the snk fandom yet! 

In the past, crack week has been run by the indomitable @momtaku and the incredible @snkception, but in momtaku‘s absence, this year’s crack week will be run by @kyojinofbraveos and @eldian-scum. So if you have any questions for us, feel free to send us an ask to either of our individual blogs or here at @snkcracktheoriesweek, where you can also find the rules and prompts.

But just because the week is under new management doesn’t mean it’s going to be any less crazy than in previous years! Share your wackiest theories about anything from flying space whales to winged titan shifters, the crazier the better! And be sure to tag everything as #snk crack theories week or #snk crack theories week 2017 so that we see it all!

Happy theorizing! 

[snkcracktheories]

SnK Crack Theories Week is July 31st – August 6th, 2017

We’re happy to report that SnK Crack Theories Week is on! This site will remain frozen in time and untouched for posterity, but head over to snkcracktheoriesweek for a list of this year’s prompts and to meet the new mods. 

[snkcracktheories]

So this is what we know about the SnK universe after the crack theories week:  

It’s Ice Age Atlantis created by the Talosians as an allegory to the Planet of the Apes, though Nazis still ruin everything for the exceptionally huge people who live there. Cloning is a thing in this world plagued by mysterious right-side injuries.

Its people have known no peace since a mecha experiment resulted in the creation of titans from Hange Zoe’s bloodline and the First King called Maria Rosina seized control of humanity. The King, notorious for his romantic entanglements, erased humanity’s memories on an unhealthily regular basis--all to get into the pants of his best friend-turned-ghost, the First Ackerman.

Perhaps the First King’s ardor shouldn’t come as a surprise, given that the Ackermans are descended from the protagonists of the Twilight Saga and possess the power to detect soulmates. Levi, as one of the prominent Ackermans we’ve met, has already found the love of his life in Zeke, Grisha’s baseball-playing son who is also his twin with stripper tendencies. It’s unclear how Levi will react upon finding out that his beloved’s form is made up of elves who dwell in the conifer trees.

Levi’s grandmother, Ymir Ackerman, is also in for a shock: her sister, Mikasa’s aunt, became the Cargo Titan. That sister is, incidentally, Mike. Or maybe Pastor Nick.

Yet another Ackerman we’ve met is Miniba, who is actually Nanaba and also a titan shifter. Many of this Illuminati family become shifters, which is unsurprising because they have shifter-like abilities at the best of times. Luckily, they’re resistant to the mindless titan virus, or who knows if they would’ve had the ability to inherit memories passed through their bloodline. As it is, in their shifter form they can restore erased memories to other people. This is because they’re Dark Pokemon descended from therianthropes.

Anyway, coming back to Grisha, he was working closely with Uri on plans such as turning Frieda into Eren and preserving his own consciousness inside his son’s mind. He also vaccinated everyone with titan serum, helped by his shifter friend Keith Shadis, who knew that otherwise the Survey Corps might become the catalyst for driving walled humanity to extinction. Marco and his relative Marlowe have already died in the war effort. Generally, however, people from other bloodlines are more prone to titanhood than to death: Levi’s squad, Moblit, Armin’s grandfather and even SnK voice actors have become mindless titans.

However, contrary to popular belief, many Asians and the Ackermans are doing perfectly fine outside the walls, just like the Survey Corps’ horses. They’ve all found their home with the warriors, to whom Eren and Mikasa are also related. The presence of ghouls in that village isn’t ideal, but it won’t stop the warriors, including Zeke’s sister Annie, from fighting to impose a coffee supremacy on the world. They’re opposed by Erwin, who is literally the Greek god Apollo, while also being the time-travelling fusion of Eren and Armin. Hange and her beloved Goggles-kun also won’t lay down their weapons until the fight is done.

Sooner or later, though, the Key to Making Titans will be thrown back into titan stomach where it was forged, and all of humanity will transition to peacefully worshipping Eren’s butt--never knowing that the First King was actually Donald Trump all along...

  And that’s a wrap! Thank you to everyone who participated: 

@adnerdiora  |  @canon-rivamika  |  @caseywojtek  |  @daylelight  |   @eachainn  |  @enochmandus  |  @etoincognito  |  @falcon94ssy  |  @getblacky95  |  @ghostmartyr  |  @madcapraccoon​  |  @mercyandmagic​   |  @mikasackerman835​   |  @myheartisarollingthunder  |  @omgthinkinghardworld  |  @perfectackeracy  |  @pinacoladamatata  |  @momtaku  |  @snkception  |  @wolsi

[snkcracktheories]

EREN MUST NOT DIE: KEIKAKU EDITION

It’s July again, which means the meta crop is ripe for harvest. I don’t write a whole lot of meta, my meta field is but small and humble— yet still I feel that I should lay my yearly offering at the foot of the temple no matter how completely stupid it might be. And since it’s a truth universally acknowledged that the guaranteed fastest way to write a stupid meta about an unfinished series is to try for a Grand Theory of Everything, that’s exactly what I’m gonna do, so here goes nothing:

The majority of events that have happened in the story thus far were directly planned and orchestrated by these two fuckers right here.

And I’m gonna prove it.

Keep reading

[snkcracktheories]

Theory: Isayama hates the SnK anime [CRACK]

Levi mercilessly slaughtering titans while reaching for Zeke - Ch. 80

It’s a known fact that Isayama was a master of subtlety, and introducing real-life problems such as his appreciation of the anime.

Let me start using this crucial fact: Levi is, as we know, the most popular SnK character in the entire manga, followed closely by Erwin. No doubt he represents what the majority of fans wish to embody: his deadpan snarky humor, his impressive physique for a short man, his insomnia, him constantly suffering from the Ackerman syndrome when it comes to his loved ones…

Yet, as the illustration for this post shows, he not only brutalizes a bunch of innocent titans manipulated by a monkey man, but he’s shown to be rather cruel to these ones in particular:

The titans slaughtered by Levi - Ch. 80 & 81

Those faces seem familiar to you, anime watcher. Why indeed, these faces belong to the voice actors dubbing your favorite trio you followed since episode 1 aired!

From left to right: Marina Inoue who dubbed Armin, Yuuki Kaji who dubbed Eren and Yui Ishikawa who dubbed Mikasa

And their napes were all sliced by humanity’s strongest.

What the hell does that mean?

Well clearly, this bloody act describes one dingle thing: how much Isayama, embodied by Levi here, wants to obliterate this horrendous adaptation from the surface of the Earth. Why do you think the second season’s announcement was delayed? Simple: Isayama truly believed how much the first season wasn’t at all what he wanted. All this praising was, in a way, his most subtle way of communicating how much it sucked, à la Dutch. Yes, the season was originally planned for 2016… until it was cancelled at the last minute. It took the whole staff to beg Isayama for it to happen, till he eventually gave them a second chance out of pity.

Now season 2 can happen thanks to the will of the staff to screw Isayama’s original storyboard up!

Thank you anime staff!

July 30: Spontaneous Saturday

[snkcracktheories]

Crack Theories Week: Finale Sunday

We’re all expecting there to be some ultimate mystery-unlocking element in this manga, something that will turn up in the foreseeable future–maybe something waiting for us in that basement. However, it’s obvious that we’ve already found this very important object. 

All this time, we’ve just been thinking that this key unlocks the basement. But let’s face it: the basement door might not have even withstood the titan hordes. We’re hardly going to need a key to get in. No, this key holds a greater, darker significance.

This is The Key. The Key of Doom. The Key to Making Titans. One Key to rule them all, one Key to find them, one Key to bring them all and in titanhood bind them.

Its power is fearsome. This is why, when Eren sees it, he remembers flashes of his past.

Think about it. Grisha holds onto the key when he tell Eren he will give him the answers.

Grisha wears the key around his neck. Is it because it’s important to him? Is it because it’s secret? No. It’s because it’s precious.

And then he gives the key to Eren.

Grisha gives the precious to his son, but tells him never to lose it. Never to let it out of his sight. Because it holds the ultimate answers. And it holds the greatest power in the SnK universe.

The final arc of this story is now obvious. Eren is going to have to find the First Titan, in the stomach of which this key–the Key to Making Titans–was forged. And he’ll have to drop this key back into that titan’s stomach in order to unmake all the titans in existence and bring back peace on earth.

Eren might die in the attempt, or find it too difficult to part with the precious. But, with his faithful companions by his side, one way or another he will succeed in this mission. The Fearsome Key will be destroyed, and it will trouble the world no more.

[snkcracktheories]

The Happy Ending (Finale Sunday)

Considering the many expeditions outside of the wall (51), the rate at which the Survey Corps reclaims bodies and the rate at which Survey Corp horses respond to whistle commands (for example; Buchwald), I am sure that there is a healthy population of horses roaming the outside of the walls. 

Keep reading

[snkcracktheories]

Finale Sunday: The End

I am bringing up the rear this week with a crack theory I think we can all get behind! It is this: Eren’s arse will someday be worshipped. Let me explain…

One solid prediction I have is that, no matter what, Mikasa will survive. She’ll spend her remaining years making sure Eren is never forgotten. She will teach her children, who in turn will teach theirs, about the heroic boy who became a monster to fight monsters—and ended up saving humanity.  

But there’s something else that will ensure Eren’s eternal fame. What will remain behind after the walls and titans are gone is… well… Eren’s behind. The artifacts of Eren’s efforts, including his giant fossilized butt sticking out of the entrance of Shinganshina, are sure to become tourist attractions. Combined with the myths and legends that Mikasa’s children pass on, it’s quite likely these structures will even be worshipped.

I’m calling it. Long after the Walls have crumbled, Eren’s posterior will be adored by posterity. The Cult of Eren will replace the Wall Cult and tiny models of his hardened form will be revered (”rear”vered?) in the homes of the faithful. They will proudly display their devotion to the derrière.

Of course, there will be more dignified memorials, including the one in the cavern where Eren looks darn near messianic with his outstretched arms and bowed head. But, let’s be real, who wouldn’t rather congregate at the base of Eren’s backside? 

7 of 7 // snk crack theories week 2016

[snkcracktheories]

SNK CRACK THEORIES WEEK

July 31: Finale Sunday

The Survey Corps will be the catalyst for driving the people living inside the Walls to extinction

In a nutshell, I can’t see the series would have a happy ending—even Isayama had hinted this in the fake preview of manga Volume 11:

“Band together and attack the evil titan! Fight on, Survey Corps!!”

Look at the cute art style of the fake preview. Has Isayama drawn this for the purpose of sarcasm? I don’t know why, but I realize fake previews are vaguely connected to the plots of the story. Imagine you’re watching a cartoon series about good vs evil. Usually, the protagonists would defeat the bad guys and save the world (or solve the problems, everything return to peace blah blah blah), yet in the world of Snk, it is another story (Snk 71):

While more than 90% of the SCs had sacrificed their lives, the others could not kill even one of the titan shifters (Isayama: for the sake of storytelling I will keep reviving them lol). Even if the remaining soldiers have managed to return to Wall Rose, it doesn’t mean victory. I mean—there were more than 100 SCs went to Shiganshina, and less than 10 members return? Even if they have sealed the hole on Wall Maria, the enemies are still there and Eren knows it:

Let me answer Eren’s questions:

1. “Plugging the hole in the Wall” doesn’t equal to “saving humanity insides the Wall”. The mission of the SCs is eliminating the titan shifters who are able to destroy the Walls—and now the SCs have failed.

2. If the SCs fail to retake Wall Maria, it means THE END. Remember Snk 70?

One of the MP talked to Erwin that “failure is not an option”.

It is not difficult to make a guess, that the aristocrats and those who offer funds to the Survey Corps for this operation would be a big problem——and those normal citizens are worse——they will loss hope in the SCs (also the current military government) and may start a riot.

In a worse situation, the survivors of the SC are abducted to the Hometown together with Eren, as Zeke uses his power to transform Erwin and Armin to mindless titans to “negotiate” with the SCs and invite (force) them to go to Hometown. After that, the SCs are imprisoned by the Hometown governors, that the SC cannot (and dare not) return to Wall Rose. After days of waiting, the people living inside the Walls are heart-broken as the SC do not come back. Zackly may lie to the citizens that the SCs are staying in Wall Maria to clear those mindless titans, but then someone realized his act and reveal it to the others through publication business like Berg Newspapers (the one which had helped the SCs in the uprising arc). The angry citizens united with the aristocrats and overthrow the military government and eventually riots occur inside the Walls as people of different classes try to achieve power and status in the chaos.

Moreover, does anyone remember Connie’s mother in Ragako?

It has been more than 2 months since the Beast Titan appeared and transformed the villagers into mindless titans. Has anybody noticed the entire population of Ragako has vanished? What if some citizens manage to sneak in Ragako and find the titan transformed from Connie’s mother? If it is the case, normal citizens will eventually know that “titans are actually humans”.

In Snk 51, Dot Pixis said that “this is not yet the time to reveal the hypothesis of the titans’ true identity”—even the Garrison and the Survey Corps understood they must hide the truth away from the citizens, just like what the Church of the Walls and the old government had done.

Let put the pieces together. The First King “prohibiting travel beyond the Walls and inhibiting the development of technology” on purpose, because he wanted to be sure there would never be a chance for his subjects transformed into mindless titans and killing each other with advanced weapons.

—And the Ackermans and Asians defied his ideology and brainwashing plan because they believe the First King was not protecting his people but making them more ignorant and cannot survive in the long term.

As a result, the First King decided to eliminated the two minority clans so none of them could tell the truth to his subjects and spread the fear and suspicions among them. Perhaps revealing the truth is equal to destroy the Walled Country that people would fight with each other, leading to the extinction of humanity inside the Walls, just like opening the Pandora’s Box. Ironically, Levi had said this in Snk 56:

—So what’s the difference between “people killing one another” and “being devoured by the titans”? I think that if there’s really a civil war inside the Walls, all of humanity cannot run away from it. All citizens will be forced to make their choices and fight to death.

Ymir knows there will be a living hell inside the Walls, so she wrote a letter to warn Historia in the Hometown jail. As the SCs are abducted to the Hometown, the delivery of the letter is delayed. If someone in the SCs (Mikasa?) agree to switch sides and work for the Hometown in exchange of turning back Armin and Erwin into humans, she will be the one give the letter to Historia. Perhaps the Hometown leaders demand the SCs to bring Historia and Annie who’s still in her crystal back to Hometown. At that time, the outbreak of the civil war has already happened—-and Connie’s mother will be killed by the panic normal citizens. After Historia and Annie are “rescued” to the Hometown, humanity inside the Walls is on the brink of extinction.

And Erwin knows it:

In the end, the Survey Corps are not fighting for the humanity but speeding up the process which leads to the downfall of it.

Read more:

The acts of the Survey Corps may lead to the outbreak of another civil war

[snkcracktheories]

zeke.

since ages past we have wondered…”who is the ape titan?”….“who is zeke?”…”where did he come from?”…..”what is his plans?” ….

The answers to all this and more…lie in the very heart of of the manga…and to find them…we have to go back…..

the first time we see zeke ibh i wasn’t payin attention because i was scrollin pretty fast and not reading thoroughly ngl, but nonetheless…. this picture is important

why? look closely at the facial expression he exhibits here…..

do you see it yet?

that’s right

the Magnum™ look of none other than model sensation derek zoolander

but pina! you say. thats only one picture!? 

is it? 

they say a single picture is worth a thousand paragraphs or whatever

besides you know who else bears an Uncanny™ resemblance to one of the models and is also a known Titan??? hmm? 

im never wrong.

anyway susan, back to zeke

as you can see his teeny tiny head is too damn small for his gotdamn body.  WHY? why is his body so unproportionate?? 

his serratus anterior is far too buff and his deltoid is 3 times the size of his entire skull.  what does this MEAN tho? well, for one he must do alot of cardio and arm workouts but if you look his ACUTAL arms arn’t that ripped so? why the ridic buffness?  WHy does his buffness seem so animatronic and out of whack?

you know why? Elves. that’s right. elves. now im not talking your fancy, arrow lodging, legolas lookin, tree humping feather dancer elves…im talkin tough. gritty! ready-2-stack-on-top-of-one-another-to-create-the-ultimate-weapon-and-take-over-the-world-Elves.

like smurfs or something

while zeke pilots the head, and the elves come to his call in his times of need 2 wreck. shit. up.  so he’s obviously got help. 

but how does he turn into the ape titan? you cry!  WHERE DO THESE ELVES COME FROM??? 

you already know…..

the Conifer Trees. 

[snkcracktheories]

Crack Theories Week: Spontaneous Saturday

We clearly need to talk about the ultimate doomed romantic OTP of this manga: the First Ackerman/the First King.

So I’ve already covered how there was the First Ackerman who, as his name implies, was the first of his line to possess supersoldier abilities. But a crucial piece is still missing from this story: his relationship with the First King. Their love story is as tragic as it is central to the plot of this manga.

Way before the walls, before the all-out war against the titans, the First Ackerman and the First King were the absolute best of friends. They’d been close since their teenage years. Everyone at court knew that, wherever the young king went, his Ackerman companion was not far behind. And the king’s enemies quickly grew to fear the Ackerman who possess incredible fighting abilities and would use them with extreme prejudice on anyone who as much as looked at the king wrong.

Together, they were unstoppable.

But everything changed when the titan nation attacked.

Once war broke out, people started looking sideways at the First Ackerman and talking about how, well, wouldn’t it be lovely if there were more people with his powers? And if there is something special about his genetic makeup, wouldn’t it also be replicated in his family? And some of his family members were absolutely up for the plan of also being made into supersoldiers, because, let’s face it, it’s pretty awesome + being in favor with the crown is nice.

Faced with this pressure, and realizing his responsibility as the only supersoldier specimen in the wild, the First Ackerman consented to being experimented upon.

Nobody asked the king what he thought about it, because he was far away doing important king things.

And, long story short, the experiment went badly. The royal scientists did manage to isolate the source of Ackerman powers and make it accessible to other members of his family… but only by completely draining the First Ackerman of life and preserving just his essence. Basically, he became a ghost. A ghost who could possess his relatives and imbue them with power, but never have a life of his own again.

It seemed like a fair trade-off to the scientists. Many supersoldiers > one supersoldier, and who cares about one lonely Ackerman?

Spoiler alert: the king cared. A LOT. The scientists hadn’t even managed to communicate the concept of the First Ackerman not being quite dead before they lost their heads. The first king assumed his best friend was dead, forever… and at the same time woke up to the fact that he actually had loved his friend in a more than platonic way. And his sanity finally snapped.

So he went ahead with the whole demented plan of hiding humanity behind walls, wiping their memories, installing perfect peace… but another thing he did was also exterminate the hell out of the Ackermans, because he also blamed them for profiting from the death of his beloved.

Yeah, like not remembering the cause of the king’s anger would protect them from it. Let’s just say, the plan didn’t work.

The tragedy of it is compounded when the First Ackerman finally made it past the walls as a ghost… and was horrified at what the king had done to his family. And at this point the king and the Ackerman met again, but of course their friendship was irrevocably tarnished. So the First Ackerman, with tears in his eyes, laid down his sword and abandoned his post as the most loyal guard of the king. And the king watched him go and swore that he would not let this become their last goodbye.

The king knew that his best friend was now a ghost who’d live forever. So he devised a way to cheat death as well and continue on–living in each of his descendants, being passed down from generation to generation, eternally hoping to be reunited with his best friend and make him understand his love.

Everything the Reiss family has gone through, all that “remembering the history of the world” stuff–it was really only to let the first king live on to try and get into the metaphorical pants of the ghostly First Ackerman.

This love story is at the centre of the whole manga, and it’s beyond certain that, at the end of the day, we’ll get a resolution to their doomed love affair. Most likely, they’ll leave this world at the same time: the ghost of the Ackermans will perish, and his powers cease affecting his descendants, just as the Reiss King will also lose the rebirth mojo and the powers of his line will be lost forever.

Using Zeke’s words, sooner or later there will come an end to this cursed history.

But, hopefully, in the last moments of this battle, the First Ackerman and the First King will finally be able to find peace.

[snkcracktheories]

Titans are humans are titans etc.

You know how the diameter of the most external wall, Wall Maria, is 960 km, enclosing an area almost twice as large as modern Germany.

You also know that the wall people amount to 2,5 million, against the 82 millions of modern Germany. 

Yet the menace of a famine is always present, and the overpopulation connected to the lack of farming land is often pointed out.

Now, modern agricultural techniques definitely allow a higher yield of the land, but even assuming that farming technology is stuck at its medieval level, medieval Germany still had 8-10 millions inhabitants, many more than the Walled World.

Now I would think that there is some exaggeration in the wall measurements, but Isayama has stated that the climate in the south is markedly different from the one in the north (where snow is almost perennial): therefore the walled territory must span at least the latitude necessary to encompass such a change: the almost 1000km stated fit the bill nicely.

What conclusion may we derive? Simple: the people inside the walls suffer from famine because they are much bigger than normal people: so big that such an extended area is not sufficient to feed a meager 2.5 million of them.

For short, they’re titans.

(credits to this post for the picture)

[snkcracktheories]

The Rise of the Left-Handed (Spontaneous Saturday)

Aside from the gigantic naked people and the horrific deaths, Attack on Titan is perhaps best known for the equally as horrendous injuries that are done to the characters. By maintaining a balance between death and possibly life threatening injuries, Attack on Titan keeps up the tension that both the manga and the anime has maintained. It has also often rendered its readership into quavering masses of emotions, which is perhaps its overall purpose. 

However, there is a second purpose for this careful balance of deaths to injuries, which is to subtly hint at the eventual defeat of the right-handed hegemony and the victory of the left-handed people of the world.

Keep reading

[snkcracktheories]

Spontaneous Saturday: Reiner’s Similarities to Tokyo Ghoul’s Yamori?

It has come to my attention recently that our Reiner may not be who he seems; as if he doesn’t hold enough secrets as it is. 

As you can clearly see above, the resemblance between these two character is uncanny; they have the same broad noses, the same sinister eyes and the same menacing smile. They are also both burly men with nearly the same shade of hair. 

Coincidence? I think not! 

Their character traits are very similar as well. Both have attempted to harm the main character of their respective series, and have/had a strong sense of resolve for the work that they did, believing firmly that what they were doing was correct. 

Therefore, in conclusion it is clear to see that these two are most likely related, and it would only make sense that Reiner’s hometown would include ghouls as well, since whoever was able to create titans should certainly be able to have a faint grasp at the very least of the origin of ghouls as well; after all both of these shows share the same fans so why wouldn’t it make sense for them to share a storyline as well?

[snkcracktheories]

Spontaneous Saturday: Vague Plague

We’ve known since forever that Dr. Grisha Jaeger cured some unspecified plague spreading across Shiganshina around say, 5 years before Eren was born.

I must say, the arrival of a deadly disease coinciding with Grisha has always been a tad suspicious. Perhaps the most suspicious part was him conveniently discovering a cure for the plague a little too easily.

How did he pure this miracle cure? Easy. He made the antibody, along with a vaccine for all residents of Shiganshina to use, by deriving it from the titan serums. Those serums are said to be beyond the technology the people within the walls are capable of.

And it just so happens that Grisha came from beyond the wall, how about that? He was privy to a fountain of knowledge. 

Maybe Grisha was able to create them from scratch, or with his limited supplies made a very diluted version of it. This would allow the recipient to make a miraculous recovery from their illness, but not something as extreme as regrowing limbs. 

If he made a vaccine of some kind using the serum formula, then think of all the people who were injected. Not just the residents of the city, but also certain folks who would pass through the gates frequently…the Survey Corps soldiers. How often would they return badly injured in need of a doctor? Lucky them, a highly skilled one happened to be on hand for their convenience. Perhaps they all would have been vaccinated then.

What would that imply? Well, even though this watered down version of the serum couldn’t pull miracles, it could allow a person to barely survive injuries that would kill a normal person. 

Remember ALL those times where our dear Survey Corps protagonists suffered excessive injuries, but somehow were able to cling to life and pull through? Let’s see there’s:

Erwin having his arm chomped off, continue fighting, using his gear, and successfully making it back to the wall before collapsing. He had to spend some time in recovery, but suffered no other side effects like a serious infection. Doing just fine.

Hange surviving being pierced by a 3DMG hook, immediately followed by crashing onto a hard rock floor from a notable height. When we see her later, she has but a simple shoulder sling with some minor pain. After a 2 month time skip, she doesn’t need it, and has no permanent damage from the incident. 

Hange (again) survived a Colossal Titan bomb while in very close proximity. Looks like her eye may be hurt, but she’s able to get around just fine. No problem.

Now we have Armin, who after being blasted by dangerously hot steam plummeted over 50 meters onto a rooftop…yet is still able to cling to life and somehow barely breathe. 

Now, Armin obviously was not around when the plague Grisha cured happened, but he was likely vaccinated as all residents were when he was old enough. It all checks out. 

These recoveries weren’t cheap moves after all – Isayama is clever. He’s showing us that there’s more than meets the eye. There’s a reason these guys have been able to survive for so long, it’s all related to the mysteries of the titans…just like everything else.

They’re all infected vaccinated.

[snkcracktheories]

Spontaneous Saturday: The Secret Life of Hange Zöe

There’s a character in this story who has survived certain death numerous times and it’s not Reiner Braun. I’m talking about Hange Zöe.

Canon evidence has revealed she is immortal. And I think she knows it. It’s clear to me that the real reason Hange started studying titans was to better understand herself and to find the cause of her indestructibility.

Upon discovering that titans were once human, Hange realized they were most likely created from her bloodline. Getting to the basement is personal since it could contain the key to uncovering the people who used the gift of everlasting life in her veins to create the indestructible beasts that have ravaged mankind for 100 years.

Facts to consider:

We know names are significant. Her name “Zöe” is the Greek word meaning “life" 👀 

Hange has survived 5+ years in the survey corps - something only Levi and Erwin can also claim.

Hange survived a harpoon through the shoulder, having her head smashed against a pillar, and a 50 foot drop onto a hard crystal floor. She was back in action the next day.

The “Science of Attack on Titan” equates the power of the Colossal Titan’s fall to several atomic bomb blasts. Hange has survived two of them. She was at ground zero during the second explosion. Entire city blocks were destroyed—but not Hange Zöe.

Hange used one pokéball and caught them all.

Hange doesn’t read books. She stares them down until she gets the information she wants.

Hange has counted to infinity - twice.

Hange can write with an eraser.

She’s not afraid of titans - the titans are afraid of her.

Whoever used her bloodline to create the titans had better watch out! Hange will find them. And you know the old saying, “There’s nothing to fear but fear itself - and Hange Zoe.”

6 of 7 // snk crack theories week 2016