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[snowglobe-system]

I loved hearing from an endogenic system here! It's great that traumagenic systems have been helpful for you. The point about host centrism is soooo true and it's something I didn't even think about because I'm not really a part of endo communities. This is some really great insight.

We've definitely benefitted from combining traumagenic philosophies that remind that the host is just an alter with the endogenic tendency to be okay with enjoying being a system. Plurality can be fun and we're allowed to find joy in being multiple!

On our side of being in traumagenic communities, we've noticed a lot of emphasis on systemhood as suffering, and something to want to be rid of. I've found that endo friendly groups are a lot more open to plurality as something desirable, and once we were able to understand our plurality as something that can be a good thing, it was so much easier to tune in internally and listen to each other, and we've made leaps and bounds in cooperation since that time. It's interesting how both sides can have their own downfalls, and how hearing from both sides can be such a benefit to those who are struggling.

So yes, find happiness in your plurality, or don't, and use whatever helps to listen to your system and guide good communication. For us, it's so much easier to talk to each other when we don't hate each other for existing.

Hello sysconversation! I'm a massive fan of this tag being coined, I think there's a lot of room for some really great discussion here, so I'm gonna try to kickstart a conversation myself!

I'm a traumagenic DID system. I experience a lot of denial. But you know what really really helps me? The existence of endo systems. No I'm not kidding.

Because I can say oh I must be faking this disorder. It must not be real. But I also believe that intentional systems are 100% real and that they exist, so... even if I don't have DID, I'm still creating my system right now. I'm real. My parts are real. No matter what disorders we do or don't have.

If you're traumagenic you ever been helped in some way by endo systems and/or their resources? If you're endogenic, have you ever been helped in some ways by traumagenic systems and/or their resources? We talk all the time about how we're different, I think it'd be great to have a chat about how we can be alike and how the intersection of our communities can help each other!

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I posted on instagram once about liking your rewrite and world building and this rando messaged me saying I shouldn’t follow you bc you quote “made gray wing an incel” 💀

WH??????????????

HUH?????????????????????????????

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I'm never sure if I'm wording this exactly right, but another thing that bugs me so much about the fact that Crowfeather's Trial is centered on Crowf and not Breezy-P is that, for the narrative to be satisfying, it necessitates that Crowfeather has to get somewhere with Breezepelt. Even if it didn't HAVE to have Breezepelt fully forgive him, there needs to be some kind of progression between them, something Crowfeather DOES to 'atone.'

And how it decides to do that is to sort of make Crowfeather a "hero" who finally realizes he should be doing something for his child. It puts Breezepelt through MORE torment, by losing his mom, for the sake of his abusive dad's arc. By standing up against the bullies accusing Breezepelt of hurting Nightcloud, he helps to turn WindClan's opinion on Breeze around, fixing mistakes he made and... taking away Breezepelt's agency in his own character arc.

Breezepelt's descent into villainy via alienation hinges on Crowfeather, and then Crowfeather's super edition makes his acceptance hinge on it too.

That's an AWFUL message to me. Downright horrifying. That there wouldn't have been anything Breezepelt could do if his father continued to be a self-absorbed prick who denies he's ever the problem.

I wish instead that Breezepelt had gotten an SE that could explore the line between the actions he's done that he's responsible for, and the actions done to him that influenced him to act that way. When distrust from those in his society is fair, and also, when it's unfair.

And god please, Breezepelt I REALLY want to know who Breezepelt's off-screen friends were in Outcast. It's not cool that only Heathertail is ever shown as his buddy. I want to know all about his messy friendships, I wanna know what those friends think of them now, I wish WindClan was allowed to be more of a "community" with varying opinions about things.

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"WindClan is the most spiritual Clan"

"WindClan probably has a pretty intense food culture because of how eating primarily rabbits necessitates that they intentionally vary their diet"

"WindClan lives in an environment where they have to be very loud and make gestures at each other to communicate over long distances"

say no more

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taylor swift is compelling to me as a horror figure

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Your anger does not make you a bad person. If you are feeling anger at the person who hurt you during your healing journey, that is so valid.

For me, when I felt anger at that person, it was the part of me that realized it wasn't my fault and I began putting the blame where it belonged.

While the ways you deal with anger can be destructive, the feeling itself isn't bad and you can work with it in productive ways.

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The thing about having and clearly expressing healthy boundaries is that it makes your partner feel safe, too. I grew up around people who wouldn't clearly express what they wanted or didn't want me to do, only quietly tolerated whatever I was doing that they didn't like, until they wouldn't, and then snapped at me for having obliviously annoyed them this entire time. I got tested for autism several times for never learning how to read minds.

My boyfriend has learned to express boundaries for intimacy in his sleep. Literally. He sleeps with just a sheet for a blanket during the summer due to the heat, and if I'm awake when he isn't, I can request cuddles by gently trying to tug the blanket from him, to crawl under it for skin-to-skin contact. If he wants me there, he lets me, and he'll roll over and wrap around me as gentle but inevitable as sweet summer rain. And if he doesn't, I won't push.

This one time I was the big spoon, and he gently pulled away and drew the blanket over his back like the curtain of a theatre stage. Show's over, done cuddling, my cue to turn over to my own side of the bed. And this morning, when I woke up before him, I tried to tug his blanket just a little just to see if it's cuddle time. And he gripped the blanket corner in his fist comically fast. Like shup. No cuddles. And I'm glad he does that - I don't want to be there if he doesn't want me there.

Love isn't about sacrificing your own happiness for the sake of someone else's. It's about not being able to be happy yourself unless your loved ones are happy too.

[snowglobe-system]

why does talking to a doctor always feel like ur trying to prove u have something and they're just trying to prove u wrong

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I don’t like wading into Ao3 debates, but I want to give my professional opinion on Ao3 with regard to archives vs. libraries.

I am a professional librarian (MSLS) and I have worked in both archives and public libraries and a lot of the confusion and concern I see surrounding Ao3 is a fundamental misunderstanding of How Archives Work.

An archive is a collection related to a subject. That subject often a person but sometimes a field or concept or project. And the purpose of an archive is to keep everything. And I mean everything. I was going to say “short of biohazards” but since I know there’s a sealed R. Crumb Devil Gal chocolate bar in the UNC Chapel Hill archives, we really do mean everything.

When a collection of materials–which are usually unique and original and can be photos, manuscripts, letters, recordings (audio and/or visual), notes and notebooks, objects, published books, whatever–on and/or from the subject arrive at the archive, they are examined, preserved for longevity, accessioned and cataloged (added to the archive’s records), and added to the archive. You measure collections in linear feet. As in, once it’s all preserved and boxed and secure, you note how many feet of shelf space it takes up. And some of y'all on Ao3 have a lot of linear feet to your name (and I’m proud of you).

This is an archive: it is designed to preserve the original materials related to a subject. That is its purpose. Archives are how we have the original scroll manuscript of On the Road, for example, or the Lomax recordings of American folksongs, or Tijuana Bibles, or James Joyce’s loveletters to Nora.

Now you, a member of the public, can access some archives. Some are easier to access than others. The one I worked in was open to the public; good luck getting into the British Archives without a good reason.

So now apply this to Ao3–which is an archive both in name and in purpose. It is intended to preserve fan-created content long term. And this means everything, whether you personally like the materials or not. It is a repository for as much as possible.

And the “whether you personally like the materials or not” is important, hence why I mentioned Jim’s loveletters and Tijuana Bibles in particular. (RIP Jim, you would have loved pegging.)

If it’s made by fans and it exists, we should keep it to document the history and progression of fandom. That is the point. We have lost enough materials related to the subject of fans of media and we don’t need to lose any more.

The fact of the matter is that Ao3 is only one facet of the OTW, which preserves other fan-related materials (convention booklets and zines, for example). Somehow Ao3, an archive on the subject of fanfiction, has been divorced from the rest of the project, mostly by way of “purity culture” and panic over “dangerous” fiction.

The fact that you can go through an archive and find interesting information is the other side of archives. No, they shouldn’t be like the banker’s box of old letters stuffed in my closet. Yes, they should be organized and as accessible as is appropriate for the state of the materials.

It’s really, really cool to find stuff in an archive, I’m not even going to lie. I have done it before and I will do it again. And yet there are other items in an archive that I might not want or need or be interested in at all–but they’re still there. That’s the cataloging and accessioning: to keep up with what’s there, to stay “on topic” with collecting, and to be able to find things in that archive. Bless the tag wranglers who are doing the cataloging at Ao3.

The pearl clutching seems to come from 1. the creation of “dangerous” fanworks and 2. public access to those “dangerous” fanworks. These are issues of “purity culture” and opinions on censorship and should not involve Ao3.

Ao3, under the umbrella of the OTW, is a documentation and preservation project first and foremost.

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I always feel kind of uneasy when people who are apologizing say, "I don't even know who the person who did that was. They feel like a totally different person from who I really am."

Sweetie, I'm sorry, but you have to get to know that person. If this person you apparently detest on every level just occasionally hijacks your body and does something awful, your understanding of how and when and why that happens is essential to your ability to promise anyone else that they won't be on the receiving end of that.

It might sound a little backward, that the key to avoiding destructive behaviour is not forcibly repressing that detestable energy inside yourself. You can deny those feelings and force them into exile, but they're going to come back and take over sometime in the future when your defences are down.

If self-loathing actually got shit done, I'd still be in favour of it. Unfortunately, it's only good at satisfying emotions in the short run, so you can really feel like you're putting in serious effort. It's not a winning strategy if you want to genuinely change your behaviour or thought patterns or emotional responses.

Self-reflection is not supposed to be a lesson in flagellating yourself. It is more brutal and gentler, because it rakes over the twisted shards of what happened in your mind with the dispassion of an engineer assessing a bridge collapse and says, "What really happened here? How can we prevent it from happening again in the future?"

It's possible to get to know your shadow, but not be consumed by it. You could eventually feel able to turn over the rocks in your brain, and catalogue and understand all the things squirming beneath. The shame won't kill you.

And being able to understand your triggers and tells, spotting your brain taking off before it's completely left atmosphere, is an incredibly important part of that.

[snowglobe-system]

Sleeping with stuffed animals rules actually. Imagine being in bed (great) and then there's just a little guy (even better). Maybe more.

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my favourite button ever is "open link in new tab"..

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on one hand i can't really blame the fandom for the "mapleshade loves and protects kits" because like, yeah it's nice to think that some of the dark forest cats would still deep down be, above all, just people, with good and bad traits like everyone else and some aspect keeping them tethered to their humanity instead of just becoming hollow demonic caricatures that are hellbent on some nebulous Revenge On The Living and all unanimously participated in tigerstar's weird take over the world plot. but on the other hand it was ridiculous how some people thought that was a viable interpretation of mapleshade's canon character when it truly cannot be emphasized enough the canon appearance she was most known for prior to mv was her carefully and subtly manipulating the actions and environment of a recently disowned disabled child through out the course of his entire lifetime ensuring his life would go in the most traumatic direction it possibly could just so she could be like "lol. dipshit" at the end. all because the disabled kid in question was tenuously related to her shitty ex. not only that but the fact he had a brother who wasn't disabled and was upheld by his mom as the golden child for not being a "fuck up" that she could have gone after. and yet still she looked at the disabled child and thought fuck him in particular

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Friendly reminder that a person being sex-repulsed is NOT doing a disservice to the LGBTQIA+ Community. Sex positivity includes people who are in fact repulsed by sex as well as people who aren't.

The only people doing a disservice to the Community are the the bigots who try to divide us and exclude people because "divide and conquer" is a common tactic used by fascists to tear us apart.