snowiewoulf

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if you're a human adult you physically need to eat actual vegetables, read real books, work, exercise, be outdoors, have sex, and have other real adult humans to talk to all on at LEAST a weekly basis or else you go will literally go completely insane and the problem is too many people choose to skip all those basic needs on purpose

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THE CUNTY MUG

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is there anyone out there with a nyt cooking subscription

will they send me the chamomile tea cake with strawberry icing recipe

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Direct byproduct of being neurodivergent and growing up isolated from your peergroup is having no idea when it's appropriate to define someone as your friend

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so mad that our takeaway from the mask thing hasn't been "wait, so we could have been getting like 80% fewer colds and viruses this entire time?"

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In fifth grade a boy tried to impress me by swallowing a whole tadpole live and I punched him so hard that he puked and the tadpole was fine.

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Disabled people will mention that the medical-industrial complex is perhaps less than perfect and every medical professional on social media will be like “How dare you say this aboutme specifically, I’m a doctor and I have glass bones and paper skin and 9/11 happens to me every day”

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i love when a cat meows at you and you're like "yeah tell me about it" and they're like "meaarow" and you're like "that's crazy man" and they go "rrraow" and you both continue in that manner for quite some time or until the cat decides to bite you

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i love to learn. unfortunately my brain doesn’t like to remember

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The future is bulletproof. The aftermath is secondary. It's time to do it now and do it loud. Welcome, to Night Vale.

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I just can’t believe we’re expected to interact with people normally after the past two years as if my sanity hasn’t cracked like a fucking glow stick

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i’m sorry but “are you from tennessee because you’re the only ten i see” is funnier with literally any other location. bro are you from capetown because you’re the only cape i town. the only rhode i land. the only ant i arctica. are you from the great lakes region because you’re the only mich i gan. bro are you from the moon. because you’re the only mo i oon

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i love this website every time i think its past its prime and all its funniest moments have already happened someone goes and successfully gaslights half a million people about a disney franchise. oldest trick in the tumblr book. 2012 revival era

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