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maybe in other lifetimes. we were partners in crime, best friends. or maybe we were married with children, with a beautiful house and a great life. maybe we were 2 individuals who had to have each other’s back for survival. but i can’t help feel that this lifetime, you and i are distant memories. i can’t help but feel your presence on quiet nights. it’s almost as if you are calling out to me. but then again, is it just me yearning? maybe i should have never crossed paths with you. i wouldn’t be so fucking stuck over you.

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i come here occasionally to use this as a form of public journal. to share things about myself so that some day, some people who know/knew me read this and go “so that’s what was going on”. however, my entries are months, sometimes years apart. my only explanation to that is that i only write here when i yearn. when i miss a life i used to live. when things were a lot simpler. times of bliss, joy, and at the time, love.

i do hate to admit it. but i often find myself reminiscing that life quite often. more so around the times when the weather is cold and the skies are clean. the cool wind that wraps you in it’s embrace reminds me of those loving days. instead now, i walk alone when the weather feels like that. i did learn how to find comfort in the solitude, at the same time, i found yearning. ying and yang to it all i suppose.

i haven’t been in a relationship in over 5-6 years or so? last one i had left such a sour taste in my mouth that i refused to bond emotionally with anyone for a long ass period of time. honestly, my patience is so beyond thin, that if i do go back out there in the relationship game, my next parter better be fucking worth it. or else i’m deadass shaving my head and becoming a monk in the mountains of some remote location.

here’s to overcoming adversity, yearning, and most of all. making it big. or maybe you can just ruin my life and reach out to me again. either we way, we ball.

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looking back at it. idk what the fuck i was on. me being annoying, talking to a void. i truly did lose myself

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It's my 13 year anniversary on Tumblr

13 years. how the time passes. i would write a giant post saying some shit about my life and yada yada, but i’m at work. so i got no time. here’s to more years

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 Moon & Jupiter - and its largest moons.

Credit: Jordi L. Coy

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do i struck your mind as a late night though, or as a memory you try to repress?

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M43: Streams of Orion : Where do the dark streams of dust in the Orion Nebula originate? This part of the Orion Molecular Cloud Complex, M43, is the often imaged but rarely mentioned neighbor of the more famous M42. M42, seen in part to the upper right, includes many bright stars from the Trapezium star cluster. M43 is itself a star forming region that displays intricately-laced streams of dark dust – although it is really composed mostly of glowing hydrogen gas. The entire Orion field is located about 1600 light years away. Opaque to visible light, the picturesque dark dust is created in the outer atmosphere of massive cool stars and expelled by strong outer winds of protons and electrons. via NASA

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Richard Bizley

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