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he's happy to be included pls consider

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FIRST step to enjoying any media is getting attached to the character whose suicidal tendencies are the most obvious

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burnchra fanart

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rudyard funn

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rudyard funn character of all time. he has a persecution complex. everyone is actually out to get him. those two facts are not related. hes like 5"2. he threw his rival off a waterfall and gave him grapes afterwards. he likes spreadsheets. his best friend is a mouse. his first response to any situation is to scream and cry. he fell down a well. hes asexual. he posed in a naked calendar to preserve his work schedule. one of his enemies is a parrot. hes good with kids. he brought cooked rice to a wedding. he builds furniture for mice. hes shit at acting. his first friend used him to try and blow up the town. he got kicked out of boy scouts. he got framed as a serial killer. he broke instagram. his kettle is stolen from the council. he dissolved a corpse by accident. he hates corpses. he owns a funeral home. hes 35.

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I love auto-selecting camp supplies, it’s too funny

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picturing griddlehark college/otherwise normal aus is so fucking funny. like. you meet this lesbian couple, right. one of them is on a full sports scholarship, she's big, beefy, a little lacking in social skills but obviously happy to try. she swears every other sentence, has a poster of megan fox in transformers in her bedroom like a 13 year old boy. she's got an anime girl phone background. she wears a black choker all the time which does NOT match her otherwise purely sun's-out-guns-out-paired-with-cargo-shorts type wardrobe.

the other one is a full head shorter than her and shaped like a stick, wears exclusively big, shapeless cardigans and skirts that reach her ankles, will not speak to anyone but the beefcake in full sentences if she can avoid it, and visibly has not slept in a week. the one time you convince her to speak, she ends up insulting you in the most unnecessarily graphic and specific terms you have ever heard, gives you a look which singlehandedly curdles every ounce of self-esteem you've ever possessed, and immediately returns her attention to studying.

one day, you finally work up the courage to ask how the fuck they met and why they're dating. they tell you that they both grew up in a small-town christian cult which the stick figure's parents actually led, beat the shit out of each other daily for their entire childhoods, and finally resolved their differences in their late teens and immediately ran away together. the stick figure twitches up a sleeve of her oversize black cardigan to reveal a bracelet made of the beefcake's baby teeth that she personally knocked out of her skull. the beefcake smiles at her like this is the height of romance. the only issue they will acknowledge in their relationship is that when she was little, the stick figure fell madly in love with a painting of the virgin mary and has never quite recovered. they've been married for 3 years. they are 20 years old.

also the beefcake wears the choker because the stick figure said "no" to dog collars in public.

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back on my bg3 bullshit

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never before has there been an artwork so transgender

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can't catch a break

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Karlach: *Comes roaring in on a flame-spitting Harley with a demonic skull on the front, blaring death metal. Pops the kickstand with a giant combat boot, flicks her shades off, then extinguishes a giant cigar on her massive bicep. Walks confidently into the Build-a-Bear.*

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Hey here's some unsolicited decor advice: get a bowl. put it on your coffee table. fill it with objects that are Good To Hold. Watch your guests be satisfied.

For example, I have this bowl of polished rock orbs. (and one glass ball.) they serve no purpose but everyone who comes into my home picks up at least one of them and just kinda rolls it around in their hands.

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take my mermaid quiz boy

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“Why are you scared of dating” I’m not scared of dating, I just haven’t found anyone’s company to be more enjoyable than my own. And also I don’t care