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pride 2025

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if we could speak with lobsters and understand each other I think they might be able to share some really good wisdom as such a long-lived species.

but then I realized. the problem with such a plan

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people surprised by calories in crumbl cookies have never baked before. you're throwing sticks of butter into that thing

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would you guys like to see a real illustration from an actual published scientific paper? of course you would

link to the paper

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Just saw 2025 homestuck discourse and I'm not here to shit on homestuck.

BUT

I know like, next to nothing about it. I was Very Online when it was popular, so I was vaguely aware of it through fanart and cosplays. Could not tell you what it's about or name a character.

My sole real life homestuck moment went like this:

I worked in an adult store. We had some crappy store-brand silicone dildos that came in 3 colors:

White guy, black guy, and a 50/50 mix of the two that was labeled "latino" but was absolutely, inarguably GREY. They never sold. The same mold came in glow-in-the dark blue and pink. Nobody was looking for a dong so grey you would calibrate your camera with it. Boss stopped making them. I wanted these things GONE.

So this girl comes in. She's got a lot of...pins. She has a...haircut. She's got a denim vest and some very...socks. I just knew we followed a lot of the same people. We might have been mutuals for all I knew. But whatever. I KNEW.

So she liked the mold for that dildo. She's wracking her brain between the glow blue and glow pink. She doesn't want a "realistic" color but doesn't like the connotations of pink or the general vibe of the blue. This is my chance.

I grab the grey one. I say "hey sooooo...are you into homestuck?"

I'm going out on a limb here. I have no idea if the grey people have weiners. I have no idea if those weiners are grey. But you say insane things when your job is selling dildos and you have a sales goal. I worry I just fucked up. Should I have gone like...orange? I have no idea. At the time I'm just like...blogging about sucking and fucking Mass Effect characters. I have many theories about Turian penis and none about homestuck dick because I haven't read it.

She grins, does the little silent squee crouch, nods, and takes it from my hand.

I was so high on the sale I forget if she even got lube and toy cleaner, I probably forgot to even mention it in my transcendent haze, but anyway I hope she's having a good life.

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I'm kind of obsessed with the way sheep are handled. So efficiently. It always looks kind of unpleasant at first and then you notice the sheep are fine with it. They're always being flipped upside down and rolled down a chute or some shit. A shepherd will be tossing that thang in the air and spinning it like pizza dough & the sheep just lets it happen

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breadcumbs are fucking legendary animal

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camembert charm always on hand in case of emergency

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unrestrained summer fun

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Me trying to Convey any sort of Information

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explodes from gay thoughts like a grape in a micheal wave