soliel-et-lune - Tumblr blog

[soliel-et-lune]

tried writing after months last night. hate it

[soliel-et-lune]

i wish i was small and skinny so bad

[soliel-et-lune]

i miss my ed

[soliel-et-lune]

[soliel-et-lune]

was entering a concert a couple days ago and there was a woman checking my id and bro js starts going like “oh are you from that medical college here” “these med students are so pretty, these engineering students suck fr look at me” and i was js so

[soliel-et-lune]

“I think you’re going to be the best thing that happens to me.” i am so in love.

[soliel-et-lune]

the house by Warsan Shire

[soliel-et-lune]

ometimes i want to have sex with a woman

[soliel-et-lune]

a girl told me i have the prettiest eyes in our batch today and i’m so happy about it omg

[soliel-et-lune]

after the movie by Marie Howe

[soliel-et-lune]

27/11/2023

science is full of poetry. i hate using scalpels in anatomy lab. my hands are enough. there is an intimacy between me and the dead on my table. my friend’s hands were covered in his own blood in physiology lab. we took pictures of it while i saw a discomfort overshadowing his face. we laughed about it and went on with our day. we learnt that carcinomas of the breast can spread to the uterus through lymphatics. like diseased water of a river spreading. is that why you are sick again, ma? one professor says, everything sings. another says, everything is controlled. how does the body sing when you are walking on tightropes? how did you learn to do that so well, ma? during development, the liver is so big that the small intestines develop outside the body. i am pulling mine out again, ma. does this mean i can return to the foetal stages, ma? can i crawl inside your womb to stay warm again, ma? can i stay with you for one last night, ma?

[soliel-et-lune]

17/12/2023

ma, life is moving slowly again. while love might be a gentle thing, it has teeth it loves to sink in. my best friend took away my pocket knife and i bought another. i tell her everyday, my heart lives in manchester.

ma, i think i fell in love again. she has big brown eyes and she kisses me like the wind. she is my new pocket knife.

i fell in love with her, she fell in love with a boy.

ma, i don’t think she knows. i’d walk on burning coal for her if she asked. i’d swim across the seven seas if she called. ma, she is terrible. and i don’t think i’m ever going to love anyone ever again.

ma, i am unloveable. and i am tired of blaming you for it. i think it is my fault after all.

ma, i don’t think my heart is in manchester anymore. i think it lies between the blades of my pocket knife. in her hands. and i don’t think love has ever sunk her teeth this deep.

ma, she is beautiful and she is going to ruin me.

[soliel-et-lune]

“you still have your scissors. you realise that i noticed yeah?”

-“yeah of course i did”

“sometimes in class i just look over while you’re writing, to check your wrists and be like yeah okay she’s alright.”

[soliel-et-lune]

i am very in love with someone who won’t ever see me in the same way. again.

[soliel-et-lune]

Ludwig Drahosch

[soliel-et-lune]