somnolent-scout - Tumblr blog

somnolent-scout · 2 months ago

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Just in case anyone comes running from his blog to mine now that he's popular again, since his "call-out post" about me is still up.

What happened with tf2heritageposts/blucheavy? This will be a post explaining the experiences that multiple people have had with the user behind the Tumblr blog tf2heritageposts. Please be aware that this post is being made in defense of ourselves and to explain our side of the situation.

We ask that you DO NOT send hate to any of the people involved. It should also be noted that the user behind this blog is a DID system, we will be referring to them collectively as “Cheavy” for better understanding, but other alters of theirs may also be mentioned such as:

Monty

Medic/Robin

Gecko

This is NOT a reflection of how DID systems work, they are a troubled individual who hasn’t previously gotten proper help either due to their own actions or circumstances. They are NOT a reflection of the DID community. If this is your first time hearing about this, I strongly encourage you to listen to the voices of other systems and not form your opinions based on this alone.

We also ask that you DO NOT make claims that cheavy is faking or exaggerating his DID, he’s made a lot of bad decisions, but he does not deserve an accusation like this. We DO NOT support those claims.

It should also be noted that as of writing this Cheavy has made a statement to his blog saying he will be getting therapy to get some help for himself, like I had mentioned this post is intended only to defend ourselves in response to the uninformed statements and harassments we’ve been faced with due to cheavy’s posting of this personal situations for months in both his public servers and his public blog. This post will discuss topics of suicide, self-harm, eating disorders, mental health, animal neglect, abuse, sexual assault, rape, and blackmail. Please be mindful and form your own opinions.

(Dell): I had first met cheavy when he had joined the TF2CC server. I was made aware that he was a well-known blog and nothing else. Due to them being active and friendly we ended up getting close. I had learned shortly after that they were from an abusive home that they were trying to escape from, I had a lot of sympathy for them and wanted to help any way that I could.

At the same time however, they had also begun to get very abrasive in conversations. They were extremely opinionated and had started interrupting conversations to interject their opinion onto it, they were also frequently trauma dumping despite server rules saying that in detail venting was not allowed. They were not the only one doing this just one of the more frequent, so I went ahead and made a connected venting server for people to use.

The interjecting started to get worse from there along with some other behavior, starting at first with personal attacks and breaking boundaries before developing into complete misinterpretation of messages and blackmail. He didn’t know how to leave the conversation along either, no matter how much we begged him to, keeping me up until 4 or 5 am in my time zone and my partner up until 2 or 3 am in their time zone. Some of the names he called us include terf, ableist, sexist, racist, asshole, and more.

It was near impossible to reason with him either as when we would try and type out our explanations for our opinions, he would accuse us of treating him like a child or hyper focus on only a few words of the paragraph instead of it as a whole. When we didn’t change our opinions and expressed our anger with being called names and being talked down to, he would flip his attitude to begging for forgiveness before going back to insulting us again.

As time went on these would also progress to suicide and self-harm threats or blackmail when we would block him. I’ll admit that most of these situations were not handled as well as they could’ve been, but we are not trained professionals, and these draining events were happening every couple of days. Plus, he had expressly asked us not to coddle him or treat him like a child when we spoke to him about our differing opinions.

As an example of one of these opinions, I am a victim of sexual assault and like talking about its portrayal of victims in media, when I did though he would very strongly invalidate me for what I spoke about. I will not be sharing what the media I was talking about is, since while I do not support it, I know I’ll be accused of supporting it which will then be taken as reason to ignore this entire post. The issue when I did speak to him like an adult, he would still accuse me of treating him like a child. It felt like I was walking on eggshells all the time, to the point we needed to make a hidden server channel so we didn’t need to run the risk of saying something that might start another one of these situations.

We had wanted to kick him from both servers much earlier because of these incidents but because I had sympathy for him and later with the risk of blackmail, we decided not to do it. At the same time as all of these we were also helping him move out to an apartment away from his abusive home, including buying his plane tickets using a credit card that I had spent about half a year paying $300 off, but because of my sympathy I dropped it all to get him somewhere safe. I was not the only one either, with my partner spending just about $400 to help and our entire TF2CC community server crowdfunding the rest of the money in just a few hours.

When he was in his new apartment my partner and I then sent him money for food or Ubers and even care packages. With mine including a $70 plushie that I was willing to give to him since he had left his own at home. He later received his original plushie back and due to the previously mentioned incidents I was too nervous to ask for mine back without him offering.

These incidents continued to get worse and worse, driving himself and my girlfriend to mental breaking points over mundane topics, only to be forgiven repeatedly because I wanted so badly for him to change and get some help, which he was constantly promising he would get to. It all started to end when another one of these incidents occurred.

I had been the bargainer and peacemaker between him and my partner for months, but during this incident I was on “vacation” with my family, being taken away from my comforts and escapes to be stuck in a car and then a small house with my abusive sibling and toxic parents. I was also sick with covid at the time and as such did not have the patience or energy to fix another one of these arguments, it was not a life-threatening issue, so I had asked them both to stop so we didn’t have another incident.

My partner agreed but cheavy did not, continuing to talk over me and my request, so I muted him. He then proceeded to spam me and my partner for between 24 and 30 hours, cycling between threats and demands of suicide, personal attacks, and begging for forgiveness. He tried to talk to us in dms, he was then blocked, he tried to talk to us in our main server, and was muted, he tried to talk to us through friends, tried to text my partner, message them on Tumblr, talk to them through paypal, and tried to talk to us through multiple alt accounts We only unblocked him once he started to make threats of blackmail to my partner.

I had only spoken to him for a little while, his attitude still flipping between the threats and begging. This was not the first time he had done these text spams and had in fact been directing them to my partner for almost every other incident that had occurred over the 6 months. I was just unaware of it, since I was always the one who gave cheavy patience, no matter what he did, and had been continually convincing my partner to give him another chance since he said he was going to try and change.

However, after seeing it for myself and the attempted blackmail, I couldn’t take any more of it and me and my partner had decided to ban him from both servers and block him permanently. Telling him directly, he had begun begging again and I genuinely didn’t want to remove him from my life.

I have been in situations before where I was the new person and ending up making a bunch of mistakes that I didn’t realize I was making, resulting in everyone hating me no matter what I tried, it was people who were willing to give me another chance that allowed me to find friendship again. I was even willing to go behind my partner’s back to give him that chance again, but after he began insulting me again, it cemented my decision, and he was fully removed.

Following this he had begun stalking my partner’s account, and I assume he would’ve stalked me too if I had a Tumblr at the time. He was also frequently name dropping us to both his public server and account, allowing hate to come to my partner while spreading hate himself. We had wanted to make a callout post then, but with another pressure of blackmail we decided not to.

We left him alone, only occasionally having updates as they had stayed in contact with a mutual friend of ours, none of which I really wanted to hear about, just had to in case he would say something that would direct hate to us again. It had continued slowing, moving on, he had his friends and his life, we had our friends and our life, until one of his friends reached out to us, describing the exact same experiences we had with him months prior.

To end this off I would like to say something I’ve been saying to cheavy and my online social circle for a while, Cheavy didn’t deserve the hand life dealt him. He didn’t deserve the bad things that have happened to him, but that is no excuse for how we’ve been treated. I am happy to see that he has taken a huge step towards his mental health and hope that he will continue to take steps towards to. All I ask is that you leave us alone after this, and to anyone reading, no there is not a villain here, don’t try to find one. I just hope this can better explain what’s been said about us for the past 6 months.

(Sol, Dells partner): I first met Cheavy when he joined our TF2 cosplay group server back in February of 2024. He was a vocal person, often active and talkative. He was also my first real experience with a DID system. He asked us to set up PluralKit, which I was fine with. He also asked us to implement a rule against mentioning or discussing Overwatch, which was a bit odd to me, but I found the reason to be valid and the server was small enough to regulate.

But then things got worse for cheavy.

In April 2024, after spending a few weeks preparing to escape his family and move into an apartment in a state far away from there, Cheavy told us that his family was planning on filing a conservatorship to control him. In response, the TF2 Cosplay Community helped raise over $400 to fly him out of his current state and into his new state in just a few hours. But then something went wrong, and my boyfriend Dell had to spend $300 of his own money helping pay for a flight.

But hey, Cheavy escaped his abusive family and was moved into a new apartment in a safer state. Awesome! That's awesome! Great!

But then the behavior he’d been showing for a while before was starting to present much more.

This was when the cycle of his behavior began to really take hold of us. Cheavy's cycle of behavior looks like this:

Calm →Build-Up → Inflammatory Comment → Fight → Begging for Forgiveness → Repeat

The Calm stage is when everything looks fine, especially after a major argument or fight. It seems like he's making improvements, working towards recovery, the end of the arguments. But it never really was a solid improvement or change.

The Build-Up stage is when he starts to say inflammatory things or talk about disruptive things. He will be generally inconsiderate of others, often talking over them or saying upsetting things.

The Fight stage is when he says something so inflammatory that his victim must respond to it. Then he will fight them, insult them, threaten them, and continue to drag out the argument as long as he can. This is when we would usually block him or put him on mute.

The Begging for Forgiveness stage is usually directly following us putting our boundaries up by blocking him or muting him. He would avoid accountability through his mental illnesses or give a quick apology. I am also mentally ill but have been taught that I need to be held accountable regardless, others don’t deserve to get hurt even if it wasn’t intentional. As well while he would make an apology, he would also ask us for ours multiple times and even weeks later in unrelated situations, I apologized just about every time as well despite my objections. If we didn't immediately show him sympathy or unblock him, he would threaten suicide or drive himself and me to a mental breakdown. Eventually, we would relent and unblock him, allowing the cycle to continue.

This is what I, and many others, have faced for months. I spent six months in this cycle, with almost daily arguments and fights. We have been threatened with blackmail, suicide, self-harm, and so much more. We have been publicly outed and had our personal information blasted to his 7,000 followers on Tumblr. We have been harassed and threatened by his followers.

We are exhausted, and we want nothing more than for cheavy to get help with these issues so this doesn’t end up happening again. My own personal experience with Cheavy is well documented and I've spoken about it before. But to summarize my key experiences, I will be listing them out as bullet points. If you want to know further details about these events, or if you wish to see the screenshots of them, please contact me directly.

Over the course of the past year, I have been subjected to:

Blackmail, including but not limited to sending former friends screenshots of my criticisms about them, ruining my reputation with call outs, threatening to kill himself and say that I was the reason.

Harassment, including ranting at me, keeping me up all night with texts, alters berating me for not doing what he wanted.

Lies being spread about me

Being doxxed, from something simple as a name-drop in a call to action on his blog to an anonymous ask being sent that supposedly contained my full legal name, address, work, college, personal contact information, and my partner’s information.

Block evasion; Making alt accounts to contact me, using mutual friends as middlemen, finding me and contacting me through other platforms. Even when I've told him repeatedly to leave me alone.

I've cleared up the lies Cheavy has spread about me previously, so if you wish to read through those clarifications, you can read them on my Tumblr. You can also ask me about it if something he says seems inflammatory.

As of writing this, Cheavy has said he will be getting into therapy. I am unbelievably relieved to hear that news, and I sincerely hope that it's true. I hope that he can heal, recover, and move forward with life.

Cheavy, if you're reading this, I want you to know that I'm proud of you for making the decision to get help. That's all I've ever wanted for you. You have so many resources, so much support, and so many opportunities. You just needed to see them. I really hope this stay will make a difference and help you see them. Admitting you have a problem is the first step to recovery. I'm glad you're taking that first step.

The screenshots for these two user’s is linked here:

(The following user asked to remain anonymous):

[Monday, December 9th edit]:

I have made mistakes and yes I am responsible for the irresponsible behavior I have made in regards to the evidence I acquired while trying to not have an episode; cheavy had lied about not knowing a personal trauma of mine when he had used a bad phrase to describe one of my alters being nice to him, and when I got extremely upset he once again threatened suicide at me laying boundaries. I had found out when I was gathering screenshots for evidence and I just wanted to get what I needed to support my claims and not look at it anymore.

I know I should have asked for permission, and my reasoning does not matter much as to why and I know this. The only names I did not censor were in the public server. I was desperate for him to stop coming at me in dms and I have to deal with all of this on top of an abusive home, I have made him very, very aware of this, and I know others have their own lives to handle on top of this as well.

He continues to misconstrue things I and others have said, he continues to broadcast everything to his audience of thousands. All we wanted, all I want is for my story to be heard, because I don't want somebody else to have to be degraded and pushed to their limit for months on end. He has exhibited abusive behavior, conscious or not, and with him going into therapy I hope it goes alright.

I really want to hope he means he'll get help this time. having mentally ill responses to his behavior does not make us the evil, vindictive people he tries to make us out to be. No, that does not mean we are absolved of any responsibility, but we are just as human as he is. We all make mistakes; it is how we react to the consequences of our actions that matter. I hope he can realize that and not blame everything else this time.

[original segment]:

I would like to preface this by saying I don’t want any harm to come towards cheavy. I had met him around the end of June, beginning of July if I remember correctly. I was coming out of a bad breakup with an fp. I have bpd, which means i get very attached to some people in an unhealthy way sometimes. My mood fluctuates extremely daily, hourly most times. i am not medicated for any mental illness. I also have OSDD1B, among other mental disorders.

Cheavy had gotten into an argument in a big server about the mischaracterization over classic heavy, and I tried to calmly tell him to leave. He did not listen, which resulted in him being banned or leaving. I had considered him a friend because we bonded over being systems, and after he left the server, he invited me to his own.

He would dm me a lot just with little things to get my attention, i never really knew how to respond to his specific bodily harm jokes aside from being polite and dismissive. Later on, he had kicked out his abusive girlfriend, and confessed he had a crush on me the day he did it to my knowledge. I suggested we start a qpr (Queer platonic relationship) instead of a romantic relationship because I felt that if I refused, he would hurt himself.

The short time we had before it all went to shit was okay. I would lean on him occasionally during episodes, to make him feel better about not doing much for me. during the end of September is where it all took a nosedive, I think. My memory is blurry because when I split (bpd) my emotions cloud my thinking. At this point I had developed cheavy as an fp. Fritz, an alter of mine, was talking to a friend in a group chat we three shared about how I struggle to feel romantic attraction, because I am on the aroace spectrum.

Cheavy had sent sad emojis despite me asking what was wrong three times. I do not remember much about this initial argument, but fritz had gotten angry over cheavys behavior. heavy refused to listen when I tried to explain how I am on the aroace spectrum, but that I did love him. smaller problems bubbled up and when we expressed discomfort, it would set cheavy off. He would threaten suicide when we stood our ground and did not agree with him.

Once, in the shared group chat, I was expressing love for my culture (as I am Chicano), and cheavy tried to overtake the conversation multiple times. This set off another argument because he is white and trying to talk over a minority sharing their culture. We repeatedly asked him to stop, to leave us alone, to no avail. It quickly delved into daily meltdowns where we had to basically threaten him out of suicide by saying we would call the police. Nothing would work to make him stop. He has admitted to breaking my boundaries and I have proof of it.

I know he throws fits in order to get my attention, that he says awful things in order to make me react, but the things he would say would make me split. When I would not react, he would immediately jump to suicide baiting me. No matter how angry he has made me and continues to make me, I do not and never have wanted him to die. I want to hold onto the hope that he can be better. but he refuses help at every turn in order to play victim to get more pity.

I and others have given him countless options, abundant advice. He has openly refused. He has told me multiple times I am more mentally stable despite being in an abusive household, and he knows this. I would get angry and lash out repeatedly at him. He deletes what he says so we can’t get evidence of him saying things, but I have truly countless screenshots.

He has never truly apologized for anything he has done to me, not once. I had not either until recently, because I am so done with having to deal with this. I am so tired of the continuous splitting and memory fog he makes me go through. I am so tired of being abused by someone I thought I could trust. When I brought up his abusive behavior during an episode of mine, he flipped out. He made drastic claims about what I said, none of which was true, but ran off with cropped screenshots of the things I said to a mutual friend of ours.

He has twisted the truth, or just wouldn’t tell it at all in order to make himself look better. He continues to lie about me and others in his server for over 100 people to see. He has namedropped me in front of his audience of over 7,000. Recently, I would try and defend myself in his server, and he would not stop lying or twisting my words. This has caused me to keep splitting. I have asked him to stop repeatedly. I am upset he still does this, to the day I’m writing this (Sunday, December 1st).

I had blocked him after I believed he got one of my friends doxxed out of rage, about a week ago. I isolate myself from others so I do not lash out and say nasty things, so I blocked cheavy so I wouldn’t do this. He kept begging other people to make me unblock him, dragging others into this bullshit. I foolishly unblocked him. A few days ago, a day or two before Thanksgiving, I told him not to talk to me because I would be busy. He of course did not listen and continued to randomly vent as he usually would.

I blocked him the other day so he would stop asking me when we could talk again because I got very, very angry and I did not want to lash out for the millionth time. I had told this to the people he begged, and the only reason I continue to unblock him is because he threatens suicide at any slight inconvenience.

Any boundary we even think of setting down is met with a suicide threat. Last night, I had asked him to not call me a name I used to use, and he called me it anyway. This sent me into an episode where I almost hurt myself because of the distress it caused me. I know if I told him this, he would tell me he didn’t know, but I should not have to provide a reason for every single boundary I want to set. As of right now, I am dreading having to unblock him again. I just want him to stop hurting people because he refuses to change.

(The screenshots for this user are linked here. The only messages left uncensored are those who are directly involved in this situation. Majority of screenshots have also been removed for these safety purposes):

Couple notes:

In the process of making this several users asked to remove their statements, I will not be sharing the reasons as to why for their safety.

We have previously made a warning post on this a few days ago, but decided to take it down as it had the display names of people from a server who were not involved in this situation in some of the screenshots. It was irresponsible and an error we should not have overlooked.

For those users I would like to offer some assurance, the post is removed before it was able to get further than 30 accounts, display names still do make it hard to find exact accounts as display names very often do not match up with usernames, and the server that these screenshots were taken from is already public, being pinned from cheavys profile, so nothing much should come of this.

As well if it is any consolation, cheavy has dropped our full usernames to both his 100+ server as well as his 7000+ follower account so we are in the same unfortunate boat.

As well as writing this (12/09/2024) We have reason to believe Cheavy has been posing a friend of himself named Dylan and has been sending blackmail as well as doxing threats to Sol in response to the now deleted warning post and word of this post being made.

We believe it is him since:

Their typing style is extremely similar (lack of capitalization and run on sentences)

The information (while largely incorrect) is not something anyone else but cheavy would know (unless he was openly sharing personal information in public), for instance, claiming that I, Dell, do work as an ABA was something that was mentioned to him more than 6 months ago which is something that me nor my partner openly posted about online. I had also quit this job no more than a few weeks after I had started working it.

The style of threat this person makes is the exact same to previous threats made by Monty and cheavy mixed with Monty (giving a timeframe for the threat, counting that time down, praising cheavy, and a lot of personal attacks).

There was a photo sent by Dylan that says “I’m not cheavy” on a notepad and after looking over it we believe the hand holding the paper is cheavys based on the similarities to another picture of cheavy’s hand he publicly posted (short bitten nails, wide squared nails, short wider fingers, light skin)

Attached below is the evidence of these claims with only the involved people uncensored:

Examples of the similar blackmail style are also available here:

The goal of this is not to ruin the life of Cheavy, we are only here to defend ourselves and explain our experiences. Cheavy has been publicly posting about this for months with his view on the situation, while also publicly talking about us as villians resulting in hateful messages being sent to us. We ask that anyone reading this please hear us out on our experiences and form your own informed opinion.

All we want is to be left alone, no more stalking, being talked about as villains in public places, or threats of doxing and blackmail. And for cheavy to continue making the steps he needs for his mental health, to focus on his college and his livelihood so a situation like this won’t happen again in the future. He’s developed a strong support network through his school, and it would be great to see this result in good changes for himself.

If you’re going to do anything to cheavy we strongly encourage that you just unfollow and block him. Don’t bother him. Don’t message him. Don’t send mean asks or anonymous hate, that is not what we want. Just block him and move on.

If you have any questions about the segments listed above, please feel free to contact either the blog rottingdotcom or this blog. Just be aware if you are messaging this blog, I am new to Tumblr and may struggle a little with replies, but I will do my best and answer as much as I can.

Thank you for reading about our experiences.

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