songhartic

[songhartic]

𓂃 watercolor eyes | park wonbin oneshot

⚡︎ pairing: Stoner!Wonbin x Female!Reader | ⚡︎ word count: 7.8k | ⚡︎ genre: mutual pining, college au, smut (⚠︎) | ⚡︎ contains: awkward relationships, an original character + sungchan and shotaro, swearing, drug use/distribution, angst (?), mild dacryphilia, sexual tension mixed with fluff, kissing, unprotected sex while buzzed, heavy petting, oral (m. r)

ON TOP OF countless other obligations in your life, upcoming exams were kicking your anxiety's ass with the biggest fucking boots imaginable.

All you wanted was to take the edge off, and at this point, you didn’t care what it’d take to do that.

Introducing Exhibit A: Your closest friend and roommate, Roxanne, who so conveniently happened to be a junkie.

You brought up your need for a “quick fix” (so to speak) while studying in your dorm together one afternoon. Though, she offered to get you some help from another friend of hers who you’d never met before.

“Wait, you want me to go with you?” You asked in confusion, already prepared to reject Roxanne’s proposal at the idea of personally consulting her drug dealer.

“Yes, you're coming with me… What do you think this is, Kiki’s Delivery Service?”

“No, but… I-"

“Don’t tell me you’re chickening out, ____,” she chuckled, turning the steering wheel as she trailed down a shadowy lane.

“No, I… I want this… I need this even, it’s just that…I don’t really know what to expect…”

“Then don’t expect anything,” she answered, giving you an encouraging smile that came off as more condescending, “Expectations are for pussies anyways.”

“Roxanne, I’ve never even met this guy before,” you pressed, hoping that she’d maybe let you sit outside in the car instead of actually speaking with him.

“Look, I’m close with my dealer, and as I always say, a friend of mine is a friend of yours.”

Cue your internal sigh of submission.

“Okay,” you said, straightening your posture in your seat with a feigned confidence.

“Uhhhh, are you sure with that ‘okay,’ or is it more like an ‘okay, I have more questions’ type of ‘okay’?”

“No,” you clarified, “it means what I said… I’m okay.”

“Okay,” she nodded, before giving you a brief synopsis about this friend of hers: STEM major, weed connoisseur, and art-hoe with a shy guy undercut.

Doesn’t sound anywhere near as daunting as the drug dealers on TV shows appear to be, right?

She pulled up to one of the apartment complexes a few miles from your university. It was one of the lower quality establishments, with the only oddity being how nice the vehicles parked outside the apartment divisions were, a sleek black motorcycle belonging to none other than the mysterious drug smuggler named Wonbin Park.

“Hey, take off your hood, silly, it’s rude,” Roxanne nudged, locking her car from the keys in her pocket more times than necessary.

“But… what if someone sees us?,” you whispered, walking closely beside her.

“Then I’m glad their eyes are working? Hell, I don’t fucking know what they’d want me to tell ‘em,” she shrugged, walking up to the front door.

“So are you acting like a nonchalant loser on purpose, or is this just your way of trying to calm me down?”

Roxanne laughed hysterically at your words, showcasing the sparkly pink gem decorating her upper canine teeth as she patted you on the back.

“We’re just here for weed, babe. That will help calm you down before I can.”

You had almost missed the part where she knocked as you got lost in your head, the front door suddenly opening and basking you both with a sudden warmth, contrasting with the cold evening weather.

“Roxie?,” asked the male from the doorstep that you fought with every bone in your body to avoid making eye contact with.

“Wonie?” Your friend mocked goofily, walking up to hug the boy briefly before grabbing your hand and pulling you inside, “I hope you don’t mind that I brought a friend.”

“Not at all, my place is always open to you and your girlfriends,” he chirped with forced yet gentle enthusiasm.

“Uhhhh, she’s just a friend, considering how we’ve only slept together while clothed before… but thanks anyway!”

“Any time,” he replied confidently, walking up to the sink that was conveniently in his living room before re-lighting the dead bud of the joint he held gracefully between his plump lips, ashes falling from the tip before he inhaled a thick huff.

Some of the ash fell on his lower abdomen, and you were just now realizing that he didn’t have a shirt on.

Good thing you were used to the smell of pot by now, thanks to Roxanne’s inevitable habit of greening out every Friday night.

“So, what brings you ladies in today? I’d hate to break it to you, but I used my last condom just a few hours ago.”

“Yeah, we’re actually here for a different kind of pipe this time,” Roxanne answered, blinking as if trying to communicate with him to ditch the wild language.

“Oh,” he said, doe eyes widening as his mouth hung a little, his bunny teeth shining right back at you.

Stop staring at his mouth.

Stop staring at his mouth-

“I uh… I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or anything,” he smiled softly, and of course you noticed because that’s where your eyes were glued the entire time, so distracted that it startled you when he reached to shake your hand.

“I’m Wonbin, but… you can call me anything you like, really.”

“It’s alright,” you returned, finally coming back to the present, “I’m ____.”

His initially confident demeanor stemmed from his assumption that you were more flamboyant like Roxanne, but he made note to be less vulgar until he could tell you warmed up to him.

Until he properly warmed up to you.

“So uh, yeah, do you want the usual, or were you thinking to try something new?” Wonbin asked casually as he leaned on the back of the sofa.

“Hmm,” Roxie hummed in thought, “yeah, my usual’s good. Just lay off the stronger stuff in the mix, though. It’s her first time.”

Something about what she said made Wonbin smile, wide and excited, peeking at you through his shaggy bangs with zero intent of hiding it.

Was he… flirting with you?

“Well, it’s my pleasure to be your first then,” he winked, getting up from the couch and heading to another room on his flat.

“You two kittens just wait here and I’ll be back with your stuff in a minute,” he claimed, which actually ended up being around an 8 minute wait while you and Roxanne went on and on about something you can’t even remember now.

The smile evaporated from Roxanne’s face as Wonbin returned to the living room while reciting the order. “You’ve got two ounces of-”

“I know the recipe, moron. You might scare my friend away if you say it out loud…,” she joked, feigning a pout as she hugged your shoulder, “so how much do you want for it, candy man?”

“It’s on the house this time,” Wonbin said, “so long as you bring me dinner tonight.”

“Fucking fat ass,” she spat, “what’re you craving?”

“Something warm,” he replied almost immediately, “with seasoned meat and a sauce… Maybe some rice, too.”

“Gotcha,” Roxie chirped as she pushed off of her knees to stand up.

Wonbin walked up to hand her the goody bag with such politeness, almost in the way that a child would give something to his big sister.

“Cool. I like eating around 7 o’clock, so you know when and where to find me.”

“Yes, through your stomach and all the way up to your greedy little heart.”

“Mhm,” he said with a satisfied hum, taking Roxanne’s spot on the couch as she walked towards the door. You and Wonbin were now sitting next to each other, his arms spread out on the back of the couch in a relaxed manner.

“Uhm, ____?”

“Oh, right! Sorry… I didn’t know we were finished,” you stammered, getting up from the couch to meet Roxanne at the door.

“Yeah, took him long enough,” she rolled her eyes, “I was starting to think he wanted us to spend the night…”

“Alright, get out of my apartment already,” he said playfully, waving a hand as if shooing you two, “and make sure to secure the bottom lock for me, I don’t feel like getting back up yet.”

“Whatever.”

Slam.

The door was closed, 50% locked, and you two were heading back down the staircase, cold air greeting you once again before you both got back in the car, driving back to your dorm room to drop off the drugs first, and then to the grocery store…

… to buy a bag of rice and a fresh pack of chicken.

“WHAT’S THAT NOISE?,” Roxanne asked with animatedly furrowed eyebrows, holding the grocery bag you two had packed Wonbin’s “dinner” in.

You ended up making a chicken roast with carrots, potatoes, gravy, and steamed rice like he asked.

“Here, hold this,” Roxanne mumbled, barely loud enough for you to hear before she dropped the bag, your reflects luckily kicking in fast enough for you to catch it before the glass container could hit the concrete stair well.

“It’s as cold as a snowman’s grave out here, Wonie, open up!,” She yelled while banging on the front door, the little dream catcher that hung on the inner side jingling with her forceful hits, “Hellooooo?”

“You’re like Doordash but with the temper of FedEx,” you heard a deep voice say from behind the walls.

“But I only charge herbal fees for my services,” she added while crossing her arms.

Creek.

The door slung open, Wonbin’s muscular arms framing the entrance with a fed up look plastered on his face.

There were two people sitting behind him on the couch playing video games. A violent game, you’d assume, given the sporadic and sharp flashes of light that filled the room.

“Is there some kind of a secret password now or something?,” Roxanne asked impatiently, not as entertained my the view of Wonbin’s still shirtless body like you were.

“Oh, right… come on in ladies,” he said with a feigned smile, extending a hand to welcome you two back in, “hope you brought enough food, because I have guests.”

You followed Roxanne and Wonbin to the kitchen, where you placed the steaming bag of food on the counter before taking out the containers. That’s when Roxanne started grabbing dishes from the cabinet.

The glass plates clinked behind you as you went to search for a serving spoon in the drawer. “Hey… where are the spoons and forks?,” you asked while still looking through one of his kitchen drawers before Wonbin suddenly tapped you on the shoulder.

“I uhm… I keep the utensils in here,” he smiled shyly, just as he reached for the overhead counter to grab the silverware he kept in a box. Your breath got caught in your chest as you felt his hips nearly fuse with yours in the moment. Luckily, he couldn’t see how flustered you appeared underneath his shadow.

“Gimme that,” Roxanne giggled, snatching the box from him and taking out two large ladles, one for the rice and another for the roast.

“Gosh, that smells amazing! Can you put cheese on mine, pretty please?,” you heard one of the boys ask from the couch, peeking over his shoulder with soft eyes.

“Yes, Taro, I can put some cheese on it for you… even though I think it’s weird,” Roxanne smiled.

“Ahh, thanks man. Oh- and who’s the new girl?” He went on, placing the controller down as he was no longer interested in playing.

“Just a friend in need of a good time—” Wonbin answered, which shocked you to say the least, “—so be nice, Sungchan.”

“Of course! Why wouldn’t I be?,” The taller boy pitched in, “but does she even talk?”

The room went quiet for a moment, the only sound being Sungchan’s clicks from the remote controller before he got gunned down by a random player.

“Dammit, Shotaro! Why’d you stop playing? Now we’re tied with the other team!!”

“Too bad, so sad, bro. I’m hungry,” he chirped, getting up from the couch to help you bring the plates to everyone.

“Woah, who’s the big plate for?” Shotaro asked with widened eyes.

“Me and Sungchan,” Roxanne said with a satisfied smile, “we’re sharing.”

“Oh… you didn’t tell me you and Sungchan were on good terms now,” you said, breaking your awkward streak of silence, just now recognizing the taller boys face from Roxanne’s phone.

She always talked about Sungchan and his “big stupid dick,” as she liked calling it.

The pair stopped being cool with each other for reasons you don’t really remember anymore, but you’d take her sudden affection towards him over the violence you witnessed during one of her texting fits the other night.

“Shhh,” she giggled, meeting Sungchan on the couch before sitting on his lap, “I hope you don’t mind me feeding you in front of your little friends… unless that makes you shy,” she pouted.

All he did was open his mouth in response, savoring the taste of the first spoon she fed him.

It was a sickeningly cute sight to be honest.

“Sick and twisted,” Shotaro said as if reading your mind.

“Cry about it,” Sungchan joked between a mouth full of saucy rice, heart swelling from the way Roxanne cooed at him.

You and Wonbin were just now making it to the living room after getting some napkins for everyone. There was room left for the two of you on the couch thanks to Roxie sitting on Sungchan’s lap, but that meant you and Wonbin would be sandwiched together in the middle.

Great.

“Come on guys, take a seat,” Roxie said before taking a bite of the food, her teeth grazing the metal fork with a loud scrap.

“God, I hate when you do that,” Sungchan sighed, tickling her sides as she laughed uncontrollably.

“Stop that, asshole, before I drop this food everywhere!”

“That’d be a shame, this chicken is so good,” Wonbin hummed with a nod, stuffing his cheeks with more of the gravy.

“____ made it,” Roxie pitched, giving you a look.

Despite how hard you tried to fight it, you were started to feel pretty awkward.

You knew it had a lot to do with Wonbin, thanks to his cripplingly annoying quirk to not put a damn shirt on.

You did eventually warm up to everyone, even pitching in on some of Sungchan’s dad jokes.

Though, the stack of empty dishes in the center of the living room table seemed more alive than your spirits right now.

The inevitable tiredness that came with staying up late without a phone in your hand started to kick in.

“Hey, I’m gonna go wash up these dishes real quick,” Wonbin said, glancing your way for reasons you almost couldn’t process between the loud laughter of Shotaro and Roxie over whatever dirty joke Sungchan told about SpongeBob and Patrick.

Did he want you to come with him? Alone?

Yes.

By now, Wonbin was no longer in the living room, having walked to the kitchen sink where he proceeded to run soapy dish water.

The scent of lemon wafted through the dimly lit space as you stepped beside him to get the dish towel.

“Sorry,” you said nervously, noticing the way he jumped as your hand grazed his arm slightly.

“It’s alright, you just surprised me,” Wonbin smiled, drying his hands before walking over to the other side of the counter, opening a plastic bag filled with what appeared to be blunt wraps and another bag filled with fluffy green.

“You just leave that stuff out on your counter?,” You asked, voice kind of quiet over the running water.

“Mhm…,” he started, “it’s not like the cops are just gonna raid my house randomly… unless… you were to say something,” he winked, putting a filler along the inside of the wrap before sprinkling in some herb, then tucking it tightly.

“Your secrets safe with me,” you said, the faucet squeaking as you turned the water off.

“____.”

“Yes?” You asked in confusion almost… he was already starting to use your name so normally.

“Pass me that lighter from over there,” he pointed before sticking his tongue out, licking the inner side on the blunt wrap to seal it.

His pretty tongue glistened underneath the kitchen lights, captivating you once again.

Fuck, stop staring, you internally swore at yourself.

He put the blunt between his lips, waiting for you to light the tip. “Stop moving, silly,” you giggled, holding his face in place with your other hand to keep him still as he playfully moved his head around to give you a hard time.

A tiny giggle erupted from his throat, too, making your smile linger for a little longer before he bid his thanks, inhaling a huff of the smoke and exhaling it through his nose.

“Hmmm,” he hummed as he cleared his throat. By now you were leaning against the sink with no intention of washing the dishes any time soon. No intention of leaving the kitchen, either.

“C’mere,” he offered, reaching for your chin in the same way you did to him earlier before inching closer to your face.

“Wonbin-”

“Just part your lips for me, okay?” He asked in a light voice, “I want you to try it with me.”

You nodded at his words, hesitantly parting your lips as he slowly set the blunt between the opening you allowed for him.

“Okay now seal your lips,” he said, licking his own, “and inhale… slowly.”

You obeyed his words, taking a steady breath in as the warm and cloudy smoke filled your mouth… then your stomach… then your senses.

“Oh, shit,” you cursed, coughing at the way the smoke hit the back of your throat, to which Wonbin only laughed at your reaction.

“Good job, newbie,” he teased, running you a glass of water before passing it to you, your teary eyes staring back at him in a mix of embarrassment, regret, and intrigue.

“How was hitting it,” he asked, pearly eyes staring back at you.

“Just as bad as I thought,” you admitted.

“Yeah… they effects will start kicking in pretty fast, too,” he chuckled, proceeding to take a huff from the same blunt. “But,” he started, voice falling to an alto, “you know that wasn’t free, right?”

“Excuse me?” You asked, watching as he lazily cradled the joint in his two fingers.

“I only do favors for Roxie because we’re chill like that…,” he paused, biting his lip derisively as he tilted his head, “I hardly know you, though.”

You didn’t even bother checking your pockets because you knew you came empty handed.

“Aww, what is it, baby?,” he cooed, turning your chin to face him again as he took another huff from the joint.

“I didn’t bring any cash with me, unfortunately,” you replied with a halfhearted expression, already feeling yourself get dizzy.

He noticed the way you began to tear up even more from the smoke he was now gently blowing in your face.

“You’re eyes look pretty right now,” he smiled, staring way harder than he should’ve, “how do you feel?”

All of a sudden your core starting to heat up, making your legs feel as though you were merely hovering over the floor. You didn’t feel grounded anymore because you were overcome with a feeling of light.

“A little warm,” you started dryly, “but like… numb and euphoric at the same time.”

“In here?” He asked, placing a hand on your upper stomach, resting dangerously close to your tits.

“No…. It’s uh… a bit lower,” you said, reaching for his wrist before pulling his hand away from you.

That’s when you caught a glimpse of a colorful splash decorating his wrist. “That’s pretty,” you smiled, adoring the tattoo from afar.

“You think so?” He asked sarcastically before whispering in your ear, “too bad compliments won’t pay my bills.”

You sighed at his words, watching as he braced his body weight on the counter before your right hand found a mind of it’s own, reaching out to trace a line up his defined abdomen.

“Then allow me to repay you in another way,” you offered, poking his flesh with your nail a bit, “you like my cooking, don’t you?”

“Very much so, yes. But you could try pleasing me somewhere else… ‘A bit lower,’ like you said,” he whispered seductively, eyes in a daze as he guided your hand by your delicate wrist to the center of his belt buckle, a line of hair leading to the bulge buried behind his baggy jeans.

A thick vein trailed from his thumb to his forearm before his grip left your wrist.

“Wanna take a closer look?” He offered, drawing your attention back to the colorful spot on his skin even though your first mind thought he was talking about something naughtier.

“Sure,” you answered quietly, taking his hand again to examine the design, “a butterfly?”

“A moth, actually… it’s a little more masculine if you ask me,” he added, the shadow of a proud smile ghosting over his lips.

“But it has watercolored eyes,” you pointed out.

“True… So it’s like.. more ambiguous I guess?”

“Maybe… or it could just be a beautiful man,” you voiced, stroking over his skin with the pad of your thumb.

You liked this.

The look of his skin, but more so the way it felt.

The way touching him made you feel.

“Uhmmmm, guys?,” Shotaro cried out from the living room, the energy in his voice breaking the stillness of the moment, “I’m pretty sure Sungchan and Roxie are about to start fucking each other in a few seconds, and I could use a little help in here!”

You and Wonbin made eye contact at Shotaro’s words, the same thought filling both your heads:

“What?”

“Just get in here, quickly! They’re taking each others clothes off!!!”

“FUCK, MY STOMACH still hurts like a bitch from laughing so hard yesterday night,” Roxie sighed, cheeks a flushed hue either from the three shots of brandy she just guzzled or the three comforters she was wrapped in on her side of your shared room.

“Yeah… I had a great time hanging out with everyone,” you said, only half-present as other thoughts floated around in your mind.

Thoughts about when you would get to see Wonbin again?

What you two would even do?

How Roxanne would react if she knew Wonbin had been stuck in your mind like gum on a-

“What the hell are you thinking about?”

Oh shit.

“Uhm… Nothing, why?”

“It’s gotta be something,” Roxie pressed, staring at you from across the room through her false eyelashes, “you were moaning in your sleep last night with that same look on your face.”

Wow. She was quite a fast talker for someone so tipsy.

“I was?”

“Mhm,” she smirked cheekily, trailing a finger along the knitted seam of her bed sheet.

“Tell me who you were thinking about… I’ll know if you’re lying, too,” she pressed.

“I was just… gosh, why is that making me so flustered,” you sighed, hiding your face in your pillows.

“C’mon, spit it out, ____!”

“I was thinking about Wonie, okay?,” you finally admitted, hoping it would make her shut up.

“Hmm…,” she started with a satisfied smirk, “you’ve already starting calling him by a nickname, I see… what’s up with that?”

“Nothing at all,” you smiled aggressively, watching as she spread herself out on the mattress like a star fish, “would you like me to call Sungchan over to keep you company while I’m out?”

“He’s already on his way over, silly,” she smiled, flexing her fingers around nothing, “wait, where are you going, anyway?”

“Nowhere special… probably just gonna talk a walk around campus. But don’t worry, I’ll wait for your boyfriend to get here before I leave.”

She pouted at your words, lower lip poking out like a baby, “Aww… stupid… big dick Sungie’s my boyfriend… ehehe…”

SUNGCHAN SHOWED UP shortly after you managed to get Roxanne back to bed. Praying that they wouldn’t end up fucking in your bedroom while you were gone, you put on a jacket with hopes of taking that walk to clear your head, even though now you simply hit a joint to calm your nerves.

That’s when you heard a pair of footsteps approaching from outside your door, just as you were about to zip up your winter boots.

Knock, knock, knock.

A a warm feeling erupted in your stomach, making your fingers freeze at your ankles.

Standing up to peek through the door-hole, you saw Wonbin’s plump lips first, before his bright brown eyes stared back at you.

Shit, why was he here?

“Hey, I can hear you breathing from behind the door… well, whoever you are,” he giggled, which made you giggle a bit too.

There’s no way you were gonna get out of this now, but you still counted down from ten before opening the door.

“Hi,” you smiled, letting him in, “don’t know how you got on campus, let alone to my dorm room, but okay.”

“I’m friends with Roxie, remember?”

“Yes, but I don’t remember you visiting here before… like, ever.”

Even if he had, it’s not like you’d be able to forget a face or presence like his.

“Nice shirt, by the way,” you teased, poking him in the stomach to which he smiled.

That terribly cute smile of his.

“Yeah I uh… wear them sometimes,” he replied, adjusting the beanie he wore before speaking again, “Where is she, anyway?”

“Pretending to be asleep so I can cuddle with her while she sucks on me… well… not there but… nevermind,” Sungchan interupted, walking from the room with now disheveled hair.

“Hell, I left for like three seconds, what happened,” you asked, observing the fresh purple bruise on Sungchan’s neck.

“Roxie gets unbelievably horny whenever she’s drunk for some reason, and I refuse to do anything with her when half of her mind is on fucking mars,” he sighed, going to the fridge and pulling out a can of soda.

“She’s lucky I let her do this much… Wait- I thought you said you weren’t coming?” Sungchan said to Wonbin with a suspicious look.

So Wonbin was invited to your place. How fun.

“Ahh, I changed my mind out of boredom...”

“Right,” Sungchan nodded while walking to the front door, “I’ve gotta go get a lighter from my truck, but I’ll be back if Roxie asks for me.”

“Hey uh, me and ____ can go get it for you if you want,” Wonbin offered, flashing you a look.

“Really, I mean I parked pretty far away, but-”

“It’s fine, really, I saw where your truck on my way here.“

“____?” Sungchan said your name as if searching for your approval, to which you nodded which a humble, “Yeah, I don’t mind.”

“Alright then, go ahead. But take your time though so you don’t slip and break your asses…”

WONBIN LOOKED IN the roof compartment of Sungchan’s truck, just as the lighter fell down, slipping between the small crack in the seat.

“Shit,” he cursed upon trying to reach for it, “my hands too big to get it.”

“Hey, I can try getting it for you,” you offered, watching as he made room for you to take his place in the vehicle.

The drawstring of your underwear clinging to your hips as your shirt fell down your waist with gravity.

“Are you wearing a thong?” Wonbin asked, cold index finger hooking with the thin strap of your panties before pulling back and releasing it with a snap.

“Ahh, what the hell, Won!,” You yelped, retreating from the seat to swat his hands from you, “you’re supposed to be helping me!”

“No, we’re supposed to be helping Sungchan. Now get back to work,” he order you playfully, pointing back down to where the lighter fell.

You shook your head, bending back over in an attempt to retrieve the lighter once again.

He was only teasing you because he wanted to see more of your personality.

He couldn’t say that things were moving fast between you thanks to the inevitably awkward grounds your first impression of each other was cultivated upon, but he still wanted to get past the shy stage.

Skip all of the a baby steps and just start running with you.

Weakened grunts fell from your lips as you desperately fished for the lighter, your hips looking a mere second from bursting through your tight jeans given the position you were in.

“Shit,” Wonbin cursed under his breath, feeling a sense of warmth grow on his cheeks as he darted his eyes away from you.

“Oh,” you said with a muffled sounding voice.

“Um, y-yeah? What’s up?” He stuttered, still looking off into the distance.

“I’ve got the lighter… And some spare change,” you chirped, clasping the findings in your hand before reaching a foot down cautiously.

“Isn’t that stealing?” Wonbin teased, finally looking back to only see your foot slipping on the wet condensation from the truck’s running board.

“____, watch your step!” He called out with a slightly raised voice, his hands finding your waist to protect your fall, which only led to you both tumbling down together.

A strained groan erupted from Wonbin’s throat as his back hit the cold hard ground first, your body weight falling onto his center as your hands hit the gravel, slightly scuffing your skin.

You hadn’t even realized that your eyes were closed the entire time until you finally opened them, the coins you held being scattered about as Wonbin’s wide bunny eyes scanned you with shock.

His arms framed his head, nose a little red from the weather and a sprinkle of snowflakes dusting his black beanie.

“Are you…are you okay?,” he started, voice trailing off as it finally clicked in his mind that you were straddling him on the ground, essentially in public.

He couldn’t pin a finger on what it was about you that made him feel all shy like this, especially whenever he wasn’t buzzed.

“I-I’m… uh… I’m fine,” you stuttered, freeing him of your body weight and extending a hand to help him up.

“Thank you,” he huffed, a puff of cold air escaping his mouth before circling around your warm bodies, “I told you to watch your step….”

“Hey, it’s not my fault that those stupid coins distracted me,” you shivered, just now feeling the effects of the weather as goosebumps sprouted on your skin, “At least I got the lighter, though!”

Wonbin chuckled, both at your enthusiastic words and the uncanniness of this moment, taking off his beanie and adjusting it over your head before closing the door to Sungchan’s truck, pulling you close to him by the shoulder.

“Alright… let’s get back inside before we both freeze to death.”

AFTER GOING BACK inside, Sungchan had somehow managed to get Roxie out of bed, the four of you sitting on the couch while watching a random movie till midnight.

It all brought you a strange sense of déjà vu. You and Wonbin sitting awkwardly together while Roxie and her Sungchan sat like Siamese twins. The only thing missing, aside from some good home cooked food, was Shotaro’s infectious smile and a recreational drug in your system.

A soul booster.

You had gotten lost in your thoughts again, not even realizing when Roxie kissed Sungchan goodnight before he headed home.

Nor when Wonbin pretended to be sleep so no one would wake him as you slept peacefully on his shoulder.

Nor how he left your side once Roxie went to her room to sleep, reaching for the dust-ridden acoustic guitar hiding in a corner of your loft after a long forgotten ex-roommate left it behind as a “farewell” gift.

Nor the warm and woody melody he started to play from the other end of the couch, the gentle hums from his throat luring your busy mind from its slumber.

Your eyes opened with lazy blinks, vision slowly keening in on the lit joint that hung from his mouth, the sound of his fingers sliding against the fretboard and strings sending shivers down your spine.

Or maybe that had more to do with the winter air thrumming through your dorm room's cheap windows.

From the look outside, you’d guess it was sometime around 1am.

The stars were sparkling in the sky and the world beneath almost dead quiet.

“Oh- sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” Wonbin said in a half-whisper, noticing the way you were glancing at him before taking the blunt from his mouth.

“Oh, no… it’s okay, I was just… I didn’t mind…” your words trailed off to a mumble as you sat up a little straighter on the couch, rubbing the sleep from your eyes, “What song was that? It sounded really pretty from what I heard.”

“Yesterday… by the Beatles,” he smiled, getting up to set the guitar back in its original place of abandonment, “it would’ve sounded even better though if I had a pick with me.”

He took another huff from the blunt, exhaling through his nose in a familiar manner as he offered it to you, “Want some?”

“Sure,” you shrugged, taking the blunt from his hand before inhaling the herb yourself, though, it was slightly different from the one you had in Wonbin’s kitchen the other night.

“It’s some of Sungchan’s pot,” he said in a husk voice as if reading your mind, “Don’t go too crazy though, ‘cause his shit’s pretty strong.”

He peeked at you through his wavy bangs, waiting for a cough from you that never came.

“Are you buzzed yet?” You asked after taking another huff or two yourself, playing with the smoke in your mouth before blowing it out slowly.

“Yeah,” he chuckled, “don’t know how I managed to play a full song, but... yeah... I'm trashed.”

“It must be a talent, I guess,” you hummed at his words, just now noticing the lit candles sitting at random areas in the kitchen and living room.

Good thing, because it helped to drown out the scent of marijuana.

“What else are you good at doing while high?”

His tongue clicked at the roof of his mouth as a subtle yet unmistakable smirk creeped on his face, perfectly matching the rosy hue that began to stain his cheeks.

“You thought of something dirty, didn’t you?”

“Maybe…” he chuckled, widening the distance between his legs a bit as he sat.

Was he… teasing you?

Your eyes fell down to the blunt he placed on the ashtray beside the table, it’s lit bud ceasing with a quiet hiss.

“I’m guessing that wasn’t free either, huh?” You joked, shaking your head at yesterday's memory.

“Nope,” he smiled, “but… you still haven’t returned the favor from your first hit, so I won’t be too mean for now.”

Of course he’d bring that up again.

Right here, right now as you sat mere inches in distance from each other, both buzzed out of your minds.

“And if you were to be mean,” you started hesitantly, biting your lower lip before continuing, “what would that look like?”

He thought on your words carefully before answering, “Well, I doubt it’ll ever come to that anyway, so don't worry about it.”

“Oh, and is it the weed making you confident all of a sudden?”

“No, just the simple fact that you’ll pretty much do anything I tell you to.”

You scoffed, “That’s crazy talk.”

“Is it?“ he pressed, inching closer to you. "Kiss me,” he said, lips just a gentle wind's push from touching yours.

You didn’t budge, but your heart beat escalated all the same.

“Cute,” he smirked, his large hand finding the length of your neck, gliding up to your jawline as his thumb toyed with your lower lip. “I can see it all over your face that you want me, ____.”

“Then why are you asking for it?,” you teased.

“Because I wanted to hear you say it first… even though I already knew you’d let me do this,” he whispered, closing the space between you with a kiss, his warm mouth engulfing yours as the scent of his woody cologne filled your senses.

His other hand found your lower back, pulling you impossibly close to him as the sound of both your hearts beating and his needy grunts consumed you.

Much like the watercolor moth on his wrist, Wonbin’s gentle and vibrant masculinity couldn’t get any more precious in this moment.

This is exactly what he was looking forward to, whether he decided to guise it under the façade of a favor or be completely straight up with you, he finally got you right where you wanted.

Your fingers tangled in his hair as you tugged a bit, desperate to hear more of his pretty sounds before the shadow of a smile wavered over Wonbin’s face at your actions, up until he felt your knee bump his hard-on through his pants, causing him to hiss.

“You’re being rough with me,” he said in between kissing your mouth, his hot and thick tongue darting past your lips as the kiss become messier.

Louder.

“And?” You asked, pulling away from his lips before leaving a trail of wetness down his neck, paying extra attention to a spot that made him twitch in his seat.

“And it’s so fucking hot,” he almost moaned when your teeth grazed his skin, his back meeting the couch arm as you subconsciously grinded your hips against his pants, straddling him.

“Is this how you wanted me earlier,” you said, stopping your movements, “when we were outside in the cold?”

By now his shirt was off and your fingers unbuckling his belt with gentle clinking sounds from the metal.

“No,” he said in an impossibly deep voice, looking dead at you as he spoke, “My first mind wanted to fuck you silly in the backseat… but I couldn’t to that to you.”

You giggled at his choice of words given how high you were, shimmying his pants down a bit further before halting at the waistband of his boxers, palming him gently through the fabric.

“Why not?” You asked in a soft voice, contrasting with the fierce grip you had on his clothed shaft.

“Because... even though you’re being an impossible tease right now, I felt like you deserved better than to be fucked in your best friends boyfriend's truck,” he said with a shaky voice, gripping at the couch to contain himself.

You appreciated his consideration in your heart, but didn’t wanna say anything out loud, especially not while your hands were on him like this.

And thank God for these thick curtains, otherwise the whole world would’ve seen how red his throbbing tip looked after finally being freed from the restrictions of his boxers.

You started at the base of his length before gliding upwards, spitting on the head that was already leaking a bit of his early release.

You started to pump him slowly, pearly white precum standing out as it mixed with your clear spit like watercolor.

“Use your mouth for me,” he almost begged, eyes falling victim to a blurry haze as his knuckles turned white with his grip on the cushions.

You teased him a bit by letting your warm breath ghost over his tip, eliciting a groan from him as his Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat.

The desperation inside of him only grew from here as your warm and wet lips finally wrapped around him.

You hollowed your cheeks a bit, hands resting at either side of his hips as you began using your tongue to help you take him inch by inch.

“Mmm, feels so fucking good, baby,” he said with a strained voice, his hands finding your head before his thumbs grazed your lips, one of them prying to squeeze itself into your mouth with his already thick cock.

The sight alone was enough to make him buss, so he threw his head back, biting his lip harshly to contain his sounds.

You hummed against his dick, almost feeling it in your chest once his hands pushed your head down further.

He just couldn’t deal with your teasing anymore, wanting to feel you more than he could begin to explain.

He bucked his hips upwards, rutting into your mouth like a bunny in heat. “Aww, fuck,” he cursed, watching the way your eyes glazed with tears.

He always managed to see you crying one way or another, and he loved it every single time.

Your fingernails dug into his sides as the sound of your gagging became hard to miss. He released your head with a sigh, panting as both of your faces burned with heat.

He didn’t expect you to start pumping him again though as soon as your mouth left his cock, but you knew he’d end up missing your warmth in seconds anyways.

“I wasn’t trying to be mean when I did that, by the way,” he sighed, biting his lip as you looked back at him with moist eyelashes, “I just couldn’t hold bac- nghhh~.”

A broken moan escaped his mouth once your hands found his balls, gently cradling them in your hands while alternating with pressures, your other hand still stroking him.

“I’m doing quite the favor for you, Wonbin,” you said with a rasp voice, your throat a bit sore from his actions on top of the smoke you huffed earlier, but he figured it made you sound hotter anyway. “Are you sure I’m not overdoing it?”

“Mmm… no, p-please don’t stop, baby,” he whimpered shamelessly, screwing his eyebrows tightly.

You felt yourself clench around nothing at the nickname, and judging from the way his face changed, you’d bet he noticed.

By now, he could hardly keep still, the muscles in his stomach flexing just as you felt his balls tighten, just as he was finished, chest heaving with need as you rode out his high.

That's when you started to take off your jeans, tossing them in the corner somewhere as he practically drooled at the sight of you in just a baggy top and panties, a dark spot forming at the center of your core where your arousal started to leak through.

“____,” he paused you, bringing you into his lap, your warm core sitting right atop his aching hardness, “you don’t have to go this far if you don’t want to.”

“Well maybe this isn’t just about me owing you anymore,” you whispered, kissing him on the corner of his mouth, “what if I want this?”

His cock stimulated you through your panties as he thought on your words, subconsciously rocking your hips back and forth.

“Then I’ll let you have your way with me…” he said with a rasp whisper, kissing up your neck as one of his hands massaged your tits, his other hand sneaking past your underwear to find your soaking wet clit, rubbing it slowly but with such a pressure that your fingers clung to his broad shoulders.

“I want you to make me feel like I’m falling apart,” he groaned against your skin, spreading your slick all over your aching pussy lips, “I want you to ruin me.”

You didn't waste any time with aligning him at your entrance, sliding down with ease most of the way given how wet you were.

He groaned as your tight walls fully consumed him.

“Fuck~,” you whined, feeling euphorically full as he started thrusting into you, hands gripping at your back as he became overstimulated inside you.

The drugs must've made you feel extra sensitive, especially with the way his tip fucked against your g-spot. You looked into his teary eyes, stoking his face as you helped to bounce with his movements, lewd sounds bouncing off of the walls.

“You’re being so fucking good for me, baby, just like that," he moaned as you clenched around him, too high to give a damn about filling you up raw with thick spurts of his cum.

“Wonie,” you whimpered, feeling as his hands roamed all over your climaxing body.

You felt every part of him in every part of you, and to say the least, it was worth all the awkward moments it took to get here.

THE NEXT MORNING, you woke up with your head resting on Wonbin’s chest, his messy hair spread about his head as you felt his breath faintly on your head. You probably looked like two babies with the way you were cuddling each other under the blanket.

It was a sickeningly cute sight, one might say.

“Sick and twisted,” you heard Shotaro say in the back of your mind, just as Wonbin groaned beneath you with a cat-like yawn.

“I still feel high,” was the first thing he said, making you giggle a little more than necessary before looking him in the face, the effects of your night together ever-present on his face.

“I feel…good,” you smiled.

“Good?”

“Yeah,” you hummed back, peeling yourself from his body as you blinked the tiredness from your eyes.

“You can keep a secret, right?” He asked hesitantly, voice barely audible given how quietly he spoke.

“With my whole life,” you answered, now making eye contact with him which was surprisingly way easier to do than a day ago.

He found your hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, “We should do each other favors more often… but… maybe not call it that.”

Was he initiating a sexual relationship with you?

Maybe something more?

“Well…” you started curiously, “what would you wanna call it instead, then?”

A grin peeped on his face that quickly softened when he licked his lips, giving your hand a squeeze once again before parting his lips to speak. “Maybe-”

“Fuck,” Roxanne sighed with annoyance, “you horny ducks didn’t blow my candles out last night… now the wax is no good,” she sulked.

“Oh, s-sorry about that, Roxie, we were smoking and it helped the smell,” Wonbin answered first.

“… wait, did you just call us horny ducks?” You asked with a mix of confusion, offense, and realization.

She heard you two.

Hell, of course she did.

“What? You think I didn’t hear Wonbin and his vocal ass practically singing as you did… whatever you did to him…?,” She rambled on, washing her hands in the sink before pulling some from produce from the fridge.

“Oh my God,” Wonbin cringed at himself, covering his face with his hands, though his ears were clearly burning red now.

“The blanket… you brought it in here, didn’t you,” you asked her, just now noticing that it was one she kept at the end of her bed.

“Yep! You’re welcome, freaks,” she chirped through a mouthful of raw celery, drawing your attention to the knife and cutting board she handled, “I’m gonna need your help soon though, ____. We're cooking for a mini get-together later with Taro and Sungchan.”

You hummed at her words, folding up the blanket while thankful that despite how high you two were last night, you managed to put your clothes back on before the sun came up.

“You guys should get cleaned up first, too, by the way,” she said, side-eyeing you as she diced a few green onions. “And preferably not at the same time, please... I’ve heard enough moans for the rest of this week, thanks to you two.”

⚡︎ a/n: I just wanna say thank you to everyone who read this goofy lil piece I wrote !! It's been a while since I wrote something that wasn't requesting, and I had so much fun getting back in my creative mode again !! Hopefully you guys enjoyed it as much as I did huhu !!

📍 check out my NEW RIIZE masterlist

⚡︎ tag list: @ashgonedash @jaylaxies @fakeuwus @ot7sevenlvr @nqvgue @riizebinnie @cherriruto @sungbbinieworld @kvstjwonnie @yjshannie @hyunjinsnumberonefun @nikisdubblchococake @babigriin @greasywall @snrrpyzen @squoxle @wonbinkisser @quirkymoon @bominute @serenityqtz @bahraini-aphrodite @jewjewbee04 @minslatte @svtf1lms @suquitoz @hyunilinia @yeonkis @pixiewoni @loljungwon @sunwonkiworld @iizanaa @bambseung @deadpool15 @s1eepyanahi @wearscvn @spkyfy @urfavmommy @anna-357j @numberonetaleprince @write4cench @choqolei @zhonglele02 @xenkimmie @whoslio @leeknow-minho2 @songbird033

[songhartic]

the things i never said

pairing—ex bestfriend!jeno x fem!reader

wc— 1.4k

content and warnings— dramatic romance, reunion between former lovers, flashbacks to a past relationship, intense emotional dialogue, redemption and second chances, reflection on love grief, emotional closure (with hope), anxiety, emotional abandonment, unresolved relationships, painful flashbacks

they knock on the door.

you’re not expecting anyone.

your day has been the echo of constant defeat: an endless shift at the office, coffee spilling on your white blouse at the station, the missed call from your mom that somehow makes you feel even lonelier.

and now, this. a dull thud. another one.

they knock again.

more insistent this time.

more filled with... something.

you drag yourself to the door, robe barely tied, face washed but eyes tired.

you wish you wouldn’t open. you wish you could pretend you’re not home. but something —an impulse, an instinct, a feeling— forces your hand to turn the knob.

and there he is.

jeno.

two years.

two fucking years.

two years.

two fucking years since you last saw him.

since the last time he said, “i have to go, i got a great opportunity abroad, and about us... i think to finish what we have... that would be the best.”

and you, broken on the couch after hearing him, wondering if everything you lived meant anything.

if being his best friend for years, his almost-girlfriend, his safe place, his confidant, his everything... had meant something.

because jeno wasn’t just anyone.

jeno was your teenage best friend. your college partner that everyone thought was your boyfriend.

“you two are going to fall in love someday,” people would say.

and you both laughed it off.

until one day, you didn’t.

until one night, you kissed without rush, found each other without fear, treated each other like something that never had a name, but felt more real than any official relationship.

you were the one who listened to his fears at 3 a.m.

he was the one holding your hand when life collapsed around you.

you became everything without meaning to.

until you lost him.

right after that night.

after you made love to him like he was your beginning and your end.

and days later, he left.

without a clear explanation.

just a “it’s better if we don’t keep going.”

and you thought he used you.

that it was all a mistake.

that he never loved you like you loved him.

you stared at the door closing. you didn’t cry right away. you didn’t even breathe. you just collapsed on the floor, body shattered and soul still trying to understand.

the days passed like slow punishment. the playlist you made together sounded empty. the photos, untouchable. and the sheets... they still smelled like him. you slept hugging his pillow, as if somehow that would bring him back. but he didn’t. and your grief was silent, without comfort, without name.

now he’s here.

standing at your door.

with longer hair, heavier shoulders, and the same look... still yours.

and somehow, he still knows how to take your breath away just by standing there.

he looks different. thinner. more serious.

there’s something in his eyes that wasn’t there before: a held-back sadness, a deep tiredness, like he hasn’t slept in a long time.

“hey...”

his voice is soft. like a shapeless apology. like even saying it hurts.

you freeze.

“what are you doing here?”

your voice doesn’t sound the way you expected. no coldness. just a tremble tucked beneath your ribs.

“i came back a few days ago. to the city. but i couldn’t... i couldn’t stay without seeing you.”

silence.

the kind that holds screams.

the kind that carries years of questions.

the kind that comes before a collapse.

“what if you just came to ease your conscience, jeno? what if you just want to feel less like trash and that’s why you’re here?”

he doesn’t answer. he just lowers his head, swallowing what seems like a sob.

“and what do you expect me to do with that, jeno?”

he closes his eyes for a second. swallows hard.

“just... can i come in?”

you could say no. you could tell him to leave.

that he’s too late.

that it hurt too much.

but you don’t.

you step aside.

and let him in.

jeno walks in with the clumsiness of someone returning to a house that was once his.

he looks around like he’s remembering it all with nostalgia.

“everything’s still the same...”

“i’m not.”

your reply is a dagger wrapped in silk.

and he knows it.

he nods, almost guiltily.

“i know.”

you hug yourself. you don’t know if from the cold or from defense.

“what do you want, jeno?”

he takes a step, slowly. like closing the distance hurts.

“i want you to hear me out.”

your heart screams no. your voice says otherwise.

“talk.”

“i know i hurt you. i made you feel like what we had didn’t matter. but it did.”

“then why did you leave? why did you leave right after that night? why did you make it seem like i was just…?”

your voice breaks.

so does he.

“because i was drowning. because i had anxiety attacks every day and didn’t know how to tell you. because you were the only good thing in my life, and i thought that if you stayed... i’d drag you down with me.”

“that wasn’t your choice to make, jeno.”

“i know. but at that time, i thought it was protecting you.”

“you didn’t protect me. you broke me. i felt used, jeno.”

he takes another step closer. your eyes shine. so do his.

“i didn’t use you. i loved you. with everything i had. even if it wasn’t much. i loved you that night. every kiss, every touch... it was real. but after that, the fear consumed me. and the guilt, too. i felt like i didn’t deserve any of it.”

his eyes are gleaming.

“i was a coward. they offered me a job abroad and i took it because i needed to run. not from you, but from myself. and i left you without a proper goodbye, without an explanation, when the only thing you deserved was the truth.”

“i don’t know what was worse you leaving or not letting me say goodbye. you took even that away.”

“so why now? why come back?”

“because after everything... the therapy, the falling and getting back up... i realized that everything i did to get better was with the hope of coming back here. of coming back to you.”

tears. in his eyes. in yours.

“i lost so many things by not telling you i needed you.”

your breath shakes.

“what if i’m not the same anymore? i don’t know if i can trust again.”

“then i want to get to know you again. whoever you are now.”

he holds out his hand.

“we can start over. step by step. i’m not asking you to forgive me today. just... let me stay. this time, i really want to stay.”

silence.

but this one doesn’t hurt as much.

it’s a silence that listens, that waits, that understands.

your fingers brush against his.

and in that moment... you know.

you still love him.

not because everything was perfect. but because despite it all, it’s his embrace you imagined every night. because no one else ever lived in your memory like he did.

jeno comes closer. gently takes your hand.

your fingers tremble.

so does your chest.

“i still love you.” he says softly, as if afraid to break you.

and you, with all the fear in the world, reply:

“me too.”

no more words.

just a hug.

one that holds everything. the before, the after, the wounds, the hope.

that night, you don’t sleep together in the same bed. but he stays. on the couch. close. present.

before turning off the light, jeno leaves his passport on the table. he doesn’t say anything. he doesn’t need to.

and you understand. this time, he’s not running.

and before insomnia finds you, you feel it.

his hand searching for yours.

and for the first time in a long while, you rest.

because love, when it comes back regretful, when it’s rebuilt from truth,

doesn’t hurt the same anymore.

[songhartic]

(이송하) IN YOU, ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ۶•ৎ . ⭑

I FIND COMFORT

ABOUT ──── with the big upcoming event songha is unable to bottle in his emotions any longer cracking in your arms

1.3wc · bf!songha x fem!reader ⋆｡𖦹 genre: fluff, a bit of angst(?) ok it's more angst than fluff tbh...

request. yes

warnings: kissing, songha crying, sm shade...

⟲ + ♡ are very appreciated!

“Look how late it is… it's 12:35!”

“C'mon, baby, I know you can do it.”

“You know you’ve got work early tomorrow, right?”

Songha’s hands were firm on your hips, a stark contrast to your unsteady balance on the wooden deck of his skateboard.

You’d told him you didn’t know how to ride one, but he insisted he could teach you in a day. In truth, he just wanted to spend as much time with you as possible, knowing he'd be busy for the next few days.

And… okay, maybe you didn’t totally hate the part where you got to fall into his arms.

“Just one more time.” Songha gave your hip a soft pat. “For me? Please?” He tilted his head, giving you his best puppy-dog eyes. But instead of responding, you simply closed your eyes.

“You’re unbelievable.” He pinched you gently, making you flinch. Still, you stayed stubbornly in place, refusing to look at his impossibly cute, persuasive face.

But he didn’t need your eyes open.

He just leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to your lips.

“Please? I won’t get to see you next month…” His voice was quieter now, barely above a whisper.

Your eyes fluttered open.

Wait.

It just hit you.

His eyes… they weren’t teasing anymore. They were glassy, full, like he was holding something back that might spill over at any second.

And just like that, your heart dropped.

It wasn’t about the skateboard. It never was.

You’d known he’d be busy—but you hadn’t realized what he really meant was gone.

Next month. A whole month, and maybe after that even for a long time. This was all becoming too real. Songha's dream was practically in his hands now.

“It’s already… I didn’t realize…” you said, voice barely there.

He just nodded, gaze falling. His head hung low, and you watched as the first tear slipped, landing silently on the skateboard beneath you.

Your throat tightened. You stepped off carefully, and—of course—he reached out, making sure you didn’t fall, even now.

Without a word, he pulled you into his arms. His head rested gently against yours, and you could feel the rise and fall of his breath.

Warm. Familiar. Fragile in a way that scared you.

He closed his eyes. You knew that scent—the one he always said smelled like home. And suddenly you wished you’d said yes to one more ride.

────

The days passed by like sand through open fingers—impossible to hold onto, no matter how tightly you tried. You found yourself criss crossed on the floor of Songha's shared bedroom with 2 other trainees he grew close to over the years. You weren't supposed to be here today, you called in early at work giving a measly excuse of being sick.

“Hey baby, mind handing me that blue sweater over there?”

Songha was deep in the middle of packing. The room looked like the closet had exploded, clothes that not only belonged to him, scattered everywhere. But you didn’t mind. Helping him meant getting to be close—and that was more than enough.

You passed him the sweater, then stretched with a sigh and made your way to his bed in the corner. You flopped onto it without grace, burying yourself in the blankets like it was your own.

“Tired?” Songha chuckled at your dramatic collapse.

You just nodded, eyes slipping shut as you let the soft mattress cradle you.

In that quiet moment, you tried to imagine what it was like in his shoes. Coming home after long, exhausting days—his body aching, mind drained—just to fall into bed, sleep, wake up, and do it all again. He must’ve been struggling. You could feel it in the way he never complained.

He was always carrying it so well. Too well.

You wished he’d let you carry some of it too—just for a while. You wanted him to lean on you, to forget the weight of it all, even if only for a moment.

Songha folded the sweater neatly, placing it on top of the pile in his suitcase. His eyes lingered on it for a beat longer. He could still see you wearing it—curled up on the couch, laughing at some terrible movie, sleeves way too long for your arms.

He hesitated, then picked it back up.

Without a word, he made his way across the room, stepping over scattered shirts and chargers until he reached the bed. You didn’t even need to look—you felt him. The air shifted when he was near.

“I want you to keep this one,” he said softly, holding the sweater over you before laying it gently across your body.

Your eyes opened, brows knitting. “What? Why?”

“Because.”

You stared at him for a second, but let it go. “If you say so.”

You hugged the sweater to your chest, then brought it to your face, breathing it in. That familiar scent—it was him.

Warm. Safe. Home.

And suddenly you understood. He was giving you a piece of himself. Something to hold onto when he couldn’t be there to hold you.

Songha leaned down, brushing a kiss against your forehead. But as he started to pull away, you reached up and hooked a hand around the back of his neck, pulling him into a real kiss—one he couldn't smile his way out of.

He grinned into it anyway, the kind of smile he only wore for you.

“Get back to packing already,” you mumbled, giving him a playful push.

He laughed under his breath, but he didn’t move right away. Not yet. Instead, he crawled onto the bed, carefully settling on top of you, his head nestled against your chest.

Your fingers instinctively found their way to his hair, weaving through the soft, coconut-brown strands.

He melted into your touch, eyes fluttering shut, his breathing beginning to slow—matching the steady rhythm of your heartbeat.

Warmth. Safety. He found both in you.

“Can I tell you something?” he murmured, voice muffled against your shirt.

“Anything, bunny,” you whispered, fingers continuing their gentle strokes. You could feel the way his body relaxed under your touch, inch by inch. He knew he could tell you anything—you’d made it safe for him. Always listening, never judging.

That kind of trust didn’t come easily for him. But with you, it was different.

“I’m scared… terrified, even.”

He let out a breath like he’d been holding it in for days.

You didn’t say anything yet. You just held him tighter, giving him space to keep going.

“About everything,” he continued. “What if I mess up this performance? They said they’d be evaluating every little thing—timing, expression, even the way I walk onto the damn stage. I can’t screw up in front of all those people. The crowd, the cameras, the clips that’ll end up online. The company’s watching too… and if I mess this up, that could be it. I could be done.”

His hand found yours in the middle of his confession, fingers lacing with yours like he needed to anchor himself to something—someone.

You squeezed gently.

“Songha,” you said softly, letting his name settle between you. Then you looked down at him, brushing your thumb against his temple. “How many times have you practiced those choreos?”

“A lot,” he mumbled.

“You’ve got them down, right? The only thing missing now is believing in yourself. Believing that you’ve got this.”

You paused, letting your words sink in. “You’re not going to mess up. But even if you do—I’ll still be here. No evaluations. Just us. And if things go wrong? We’ll figure it out together. Can I promise you that?”

He didn’t answer right away, but his fingers curled a little tighter around yours—his silent way of saying yes.

“You really promise?” he asked softly, finally looking up at you. “You won’t leave the guy who screwed up and embarrassed the whole company?”

You smiled, unable to help it. “Oh no, baby… they do that to themselves already.”

His laughter came out muffled against your chest, quiet but real—the kind that let you know you’d reached him.

And for a second, it felt like the weight on his shoulders wasn’t quite so heavy.

author's note.

Tbh I'm not really satisfied with this. I tried to attempt fluff and somehow ended with this rushed mess. I'll make up to you i promise 🩹🤍

[songhartic]

trying to push my limit so i land over 3k, aiming for a 6k word count 🙏

[songhartic]

hiiiii! a writer from smtr25!?!?!?!?!?!?!? WHAT A BLESSING 💘 i can't wait to read your work (especially hamin's👀🩷)

yesss, couldn't find anything so ig i'll do it myself😭😚 i got something in the works👀 and with the vid posted im motivated, seems like hamin is a bit camera shy hehe 🤭

[songhartic]

( #저스틴 ) : THIS IS FALLING, FALLING IN LOVE

JVKE | Justin Jay Takagi | ｡𖦹°‧ _________ this is what falling in love feels like

MASTERLIST ౨ৎ ( 001 ) bf ! jj x fem ! reader,

fluff : 956wc ⊹ ࣪ ˖ happy reading!

⟲ + ♡ appreciated! also looking for moots:)

“YOU aren’t peeking, are you?”

“No, dummy. It’s basically impossible with those big hands of yours.”

You giggle as Justin leads you into the unknown.

You can feel the rough pattern of grass brushing against your ankles as you walk. The sun is warm on your skin, shining high above, and a bird chirps happily nearby—or so you think. Soon, the sound of splashing water reaches your ears, making you turn skeptical.

You can feel the rough pattern of grass brushing against your ankles as you walk. The sun is warm on your skin, shining high above, and a bird chirps happily nearby—or so you think. Soon, the sound of splashing water reaches your ears, making you turn skeptical.

Where was your boyfriend of two months taking you?

“We’re almost there,” he whispers in your ear. It sends a shiver down your spine as it lightly tickles. He smiles when he notices, placing a gentle kiss on your bare shoulder. He takes two more steps with you—one last step—before removing his hands from your eyes, revealing a beautiful scene crafted by him and nature together.

A red checkered picnic mat lies on the freshly cut grass, with a big basket topped by a familiar pink silk bow wrapped around the handle.

Your smile widens before you jump into his arms, which he thankfully times perfectly, catching you with his hands under your thighs.

“Happy anniversary, babydoll,” he says before pressing his lips to yours.

His lips are warm like the sun, radiating the same comfort and happiness you feel in its presence. And if you weren’t so distracted, you would’ve noticed both of your heartbeats syncing—confessing love in their own silent rhythm as you hold each other close.

When you pull away and your faces are visible again, you notice a red tint on his cheeks. You can’t help but kiss them, making them even redder. Justin almost resembles a tomato, and a giggle escapes your lips.

“Are you hungry? I prepared a lot,” he says, avoiding your gaze—flustered by how easily you make him feel so vulnerable. His eyes, however, never lie; they mirror the love he holds as he watches you sit down on one of the pillows he brought.

Your dress falls nearly to your ankles, and you try carefully to sit without it getting all over the place. You always look so beautiful in a dress, he thinks.

“Princess?”

“Hm?”

“Did I tell you how beautiful you look today?”

Now it’s your turn to be flustered. Justin can’t help but chuckle at the sight as you shyly avoid his gaze, turning your attention to the basket beside you.

“So, what’d you bring?”

Justin settles down beside you, immediately helping to unpack and plate the food.

Once everything is laid out, you reach for the bowl of strawberries—their tempting red glow calling your name.

“I want one too,” Justin says, pointing to the strawberries and opening his mouth.

“Say ‘ahh.’”

aah

“Ouch! Not my finger!” You rub the spot where his teeth dug in.

Justin laughs to himself after biting your finger head landing in your lap, still chuckling.

“Was it at least good?” you ask playfully, still rubbing at the spot.

“The strawberry, or you?” he replies, taking your bitten finger and placing a soft kiss on it in apology.

“Obviously the fruit, JJ!”

“Oh no, baby, are you mad at me?” he asks softly, his giggles fading. Sitting up, he cups your face in his hands.

“I’m sorry, baby.”

He places a sweet kiss on the tip of your nose.

“You’re forgiven… but only because you’re cute.”

Justin laughs again, then leans in to kiss your pouty lips, gently holding your chin. This kiss lingers longer, until the need for air separates you—only briefly—before he dives in again. Neither of you can get enough.

Your hands roam over each other before settling into a gentle hold. Justin lifts you and sits you on his lap, his hands resting at your waist.

He slightly tilts his head to deepen the kiss comfortably. When your lips part again, you’re both left breathless—hearts racing, faces flushed.

[songhartic]

SMTR25

MASTERLIST

i'll be writing for smtr25, any requests are very much appreciated. notice > i won't write for members after 2006 since i am 05 and i won't feel comfortable writing for anyone younger than that.

이한비 LEE HANBI

coming soon

이송하 LEE SONGHA

IN YOU, I FIND COMFORT (fluff)

니콜라스 LEE NICHOLAS

coming soon

이다니엘 DANIEL LEE

coming soon

캇쇼 KASSHO

coming soon

저스틴 JUSTIN JAY TAKAGI

THIS IS FALLING, FALLING IN LOVE (fluff)

오현준 HYUNJUN OH

coming soon

하루타 HARUTA

coming soon

이하민 LEE HAMIN

coming soon

+

ik you can see the quality from the images but i tried, not only is canva kicking my a** but also tumblr is doing me dirty:/

note that i am also a first timer writer and my primary language isn't eng so please understand, thank you♡

[songhartic]

Joy Sullivan, from "Late Bloomer", Instructions for Traveling West

[songhartic]

@academia-lucifer