sonofkrabkrab

[sonofkrabkrab]

casual roob

[sonofkrabkrab]

Click to go on an adventure!

Today's Adventure is that I, after an unintentional 13-hour power nap,

Got woken up at 6AM by a phone call from a friend stranded in Montana because of the heat wave and almost no cell service because of their crap provider.

OhSoThat'sHowIt'sGonnaBe.jpg

Ok.

I somehow summon a week's worth of spoons and in less than 30 minutes and 5 phone calls, get them

A hotel

An appointment with a mechanic from 2 states away

A perscription refilled from 2 states away

and A Pizza

Go me.

But then it's 8AM and there are unscheduled live humans at the door and while EVERGENCY MODE is still on, I have already blown through a ton of spoons, and also probably shouldn't meet whoever it is wearing just a pair of bootyshorts that say "CRYPTID" in Gothic Font on my ass.

So I greet them in those shorts and a T-shirt that I manage to put on both inside out and backwards

#nailedit

It is, Fortunately, not the mormons.

it is, Unfortunately, two UPS guys trying to deliver my other in-house friend's new phone except the new guy doesn't know how to operate the "sign for package" device, and the old guy that's supposed to be mentoring him is like, 92, deaf as a post, and doesn't actually know how to operate the device either.

by the way

it is already

over 100 out

it takes almost 30 minutes to sign for the phone

when i get back inside, i discover that apparently the Corgi has learned how to open his kennel from the inside because he is now out of the kennel and waiting for me to come in.

he also has cat litter all over his face because while he was waiting for me he also learned how to open the baby gate to the cat's room and help himself to a cat shit breakfast.

He'll be fine

He's a cattle dog, they're legally required to have at least 1 really disgusting snack they love.

but

more to the point

i have no idea at what point he learned to open his kennel from the inside

has he been staying there out of politeness this whole time??

And

I got other shit to do today.

namely.

I'm seeing a realator

The Devils most pathetic yet effective demons

I get a reminder text that I have an appointment with her

at least

I think that's what it is because what she sends me is: "🏡⏰12:00 ❔"

With the time typed in the middle like that.

She is, according to her profile, at least 80.

so I reply "😎👍"

and then she sends me a string of GODDAMN POST-MODERN EMOJI HEIROGLYPHICS THAT TAKE UP MY ENTIRE SCREEN.

She's on an iPhone so half of them don't even translate across platforms

It takes me half an hour and three different software programs and goddamn wingdings to translate, but she has sent me the address and rules about masking and not wearing shoes inside.

in emoji

instead of like

literally any other format

I am

FASCINATED

and simply must meet the woman so if I don't come back to update I got stolen by the fairies but I'm taking the Corgi with me as protection so I'll see y'all later.

[sonofkrabkrab]

Pokemon headcanon that once Absol are studied and people realize they prevent disasters instead of causing them, particularly dangerous workplaces get themselves a workplace Absol and it also decreases accidents.

Construction sites and fishing ships and factories will have one that pretty much just lazes about until it just gets up howling one day and knocks a dude down. They almost never figure out what would have happened but they're always like "yes absol thank you absol I am so grateful to be on the floor right now. Can I offer you a treat in this trying time"

[sonofkrabkrab]

sometimes, after Dante gets back to the human world.🫢💀

[sonofkrabkrab]

We have always existed, and we always will.

[sonofkrabkrab]

Watching Together. 🫂

[sonofkrabkrab]

Swamp Witch flexin'

[sonofkrabkrab]

Ooollldd old sketches.

[sonofkrabkrab]

[sonofkrabkrab]

Link ~~~

[sonofkrabkrab]

may i share with you the best video on the internet

[sonofkrabkrab]

This joke came to me in a fit of laughter (ALT description provided :3!)

[sonofkrabkrab]

A dinosaur obsessed 12 year old studied fossils and found a 69 million year old hadrosaur skeleton embedded in rock while hiking. A fisherman in Australia noticed tiny shrimp in his net that looked slightly different from the others and he sent a few specimens to biologists for testing. Turned out to be a never before described species, going unnoticed in a popular lake. I posted a pic ~here on tumblr~ of a weird parasite on a dead fish and a parasitologist found it and asked to report it as the species has never been seen in my area before.

There is so, so much out there we literally don’t even know. And the best way to find that stuff out is to be intensely curious about everything you see. You might not discover a new species but you absolutely will gain a deeper appreciation for the world around you.

[sonofkrabkrab]

people will get mad abt parents allowing their child the freedom to avoid a puberty they dont want but then name their own children in the idiom of warhammer 40k

[sonofkrabkrab]

[sonofkrabkrab]

parenting 101