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The Spanish Chestnut Tree

I grew up on the east coast of Co. Antrim in Northern Ireland. It’s a wild rocky shore, beautiful and dangerous, becoming more so as you head north.

Not far from my hometown is the village of Cairncastle (you may be familiar as it provides the backdrop to Winterfell in Game of Thrones, where Ned Stark executes the Nights Watch deserter).

There has been a settlement here in Cairncastle for…

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If we were having coffee

If we were having coffee

If we were having coffee

Ah, if we were having coffee, I imagine it would feel like a celebration. If we were having coffee, that would mean that the world had turned, it would be safe to meet friends and life could have a bit more ‘familiar’ about it.

As it stands, we will have to settle for a socially distant coffee, how would you feel about a picnic coffee in the park? Is your hay fever…

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Covid-19 and protecting our NHS

I am finding it more and more difficult to watch the Government briefings regarding Covid-19; yesterday with Michael Gove hit a new low. In the end, overcome with nausea and frustration I had to switch off. How that self-confessed coke addled nematode has the gall to tell the Nation how to protect the NHS after spending his political career undermining it, is beyond me.

Check his voting…

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Stay the fuck at home

Inspired by the work of Adam Mansbach and in response to Covid-19

A chill has cooled your cappuccino,

Your latte has lost its foam,

It’s time to leave the coffee shop, my love,

And stay the fuck at home.

The bookshop is all but empty,

Yet you linger over your tome,

Come on, what the hell, what is taking so long?

Time to get your butt back home!

The wind…

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Love and Grief

“Grief is the price we pay for love”*

This quotation has been on my mind a lot recently, let’s say I am currently paying my debts.

My Dad is ill; very ill, and the prospects are not good. He has been in hospital for over three weeks now and his decline has been swift. Though we hope to put things in place to get him home, we know that this is so that he can spend his final days in familiar…

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If we were having...

If we were having…

It’s 01 December, you might not be up for a coffee, is it too early for a mulled wine? Hot chocolate anyone?

It’s been all go in Casa Della Plot what with one thing and another.

No.1 Cub’s dreaded AQE exam is now over and we celebrated with ice cream in November. We can now forget about it for a while until the results come out and then the fresh hell of ‘is it enough for his chosen school’ worry…

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Coffee & Shortbread at Campbell College

Hello. How are y’all? This morning’s nail biting session coffee break comes from Campbell College Belfast (AKA Hogwarts). I’m currently speed drinking black coffee and comfort eating cranberry shortbread in the dining hall as Cub No. 1 sits his AQE exam in one of the classrooms.

This is the second of three exams. The last will be next Saturday.

Nothing like the canteen in my old school, look at…

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If we were having coffee... 15/11/19

If we were having coffee… 15/11/19

I didn’t quite make the post last week, there was no time for coffee – boo! This week I’m determined not to continue to slip, however… if we were having coffee this week, it might be an instant coffee, in a horrible single-use plastic cup, out of a vending machine. I’m not really selling this, am I? 

I don’t remember the last time I had an instant coffee; bloody horrible stuff, but I do remember…

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Good Morning! How are you? Take your coat off and sit down. What can I get you; a Cappuccino; flat white; espresso; perhaps a cup of tea? It’s been over a week since I last posted, so I’m slipping with the schedule, but it’s been a busy week.

Half Term

The boys have been off school for Halloween/Half Term, and I took some annual leave so that I could be off with them. That’s been a real treat; we managed to get out for some lovely walks with the dogs, I collected conkers, the dogs chased squirrels and the boys made sure my laundry pile didn’t decrease any, regardless of how many loads went into the washing machine.

We have two dogs, both rescues of a similar age but they aren’t related. Masie, the canine food hoover, is a Schnauzer/ Fox Terrier cross who loves to roll in anything stinky; and Bran is a Border Terrier and something equally feisty. He was rescued from a shipping container in Dublin port with 200 other pups, on their way to who knows where! He’s a lot better than he was but still has ‘issues’ particularly with loud noises, needless to say, he’s not fond of fireworks. We call him our Irish Border Terrierist.

Look at that, butter wouldn’t melt!

He does love ‘small furries’ – that is he loves to chase them, and given the opportunity, he’d love to shake them until they are deaded. So squirrel season in the park is marked by big mad zoomies as he loops around with excitement. It’s an exercise of enthusiasm over strategy as he has no idea about stalking.

The squirrels see him coming and are able to leg it up a tree and laugh and shout insults at him from a safe height. <in a French accent> “Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!”

On the subject of small woodland animals, particularly those who need to be protected from Bran, there has been great excitement in our house over a recent visitor. We have a hedgehog! We have suspected that one was lurking, but this was confirmed by a sighting this week, so we have started leaving some food and water out for it.

A startled hedgehog who visits our garden after dark

Yes, we are being careful, it is getting some dog food, no milk or fish as they are intolerant to both. Every morning the bowl is liked clean, and we had a second sighting last night; with the lights off we were able to watch it tuck in and then run off at surprising speed once finished.

I was a bit late in getting any Halloween decorations up, but we got there eventually and spent a full afternoon carving pumpkins. For some reason, both of my boys seem to be a bit overwhelmed by anything creative or arty, are quick to profess no talent there and give up; so I’m trying to build their confidence so that they might enjoy it some more. That’s why traditions like this are so useful, there’s no right or wrong way of carving a pumpkin, we just go with where it takes us.

  a stab in the dark

scary enough for you?

Having said that after a few hours outside, guiding little knife clad hands in the cold, over a slippy pumpkin skin prone to slippage, I was more than ready for a stiff drink afterwards. Hopefully, I hid my wreaked nerves and they built a bit more confidence, they were certainly happy with their results which was the main thing.

I managed to do a lot of baking too, buns mainly, for Cub No 1’s Halloween Party, but I also managed an Eve’s Pudding (with hidden coins inside) which was perfect after a 3 hour Trick or Treat session with Cub No 2 – I hope he remembers this when he’s older!

  How’s your coffee, do you need a top-up?

I’m spending more time with my Mum & Dad at the moment, they live about 3/4 hour’s drive away. At 81, my Dad is not in the best of health, with vascular dementia and Alzheimer’s, which is supremely difficult for my Mum. She is a star, doing everything for him under very difficult circumstances with no thanks. We are trying to figure out some way of getting help but as you’ll appreciate, this is not easy.

In happier news though, this is our wedding anniversary, Mr. Plot & I got hitched this day 12 years ago, on a beautiful autumn day just like today.

Whispering sweet nothings

Don’t drop me!

A rare moment of peace

My flowers, that I arranged myself. with Sonia Orchids, and for both Grandmothers who couldn’t be there, Roses for Granny Rose, and Lilies for Granny Lilla

I remember it fondly. It had been quite the journey getting to that point, all of us still bear the scars, I wrote about those here 2nd Wife’s Club but we got there, and the wedding itself really was a celebration of joy. I’ve picked up a few tips on the way and wrote about them here Ten Things I’ve Learned in 10 Years of Marriage

  If We Were Having Coffee 03/11/19 Good Morning! How are you? Take your coat off and sit down. What can I get you; a Cappuccino; flat white; espresso; perhaps a cup of tea?

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If we were having coffee this week, first of all, how are you? I probably haven’t seen you in ages. If I don’t live with you, work with you, or if I’m not related to you (even then it’s no guarantee) then chances are I don’t see you as much as I’d like. While I’m listening, I’m going to get the coffees in, my treat today, no arguing. To celebrate being off for Halloween, I’m having an Irish Coffee, what would you like?

I had a mental list of stuff to write about this week, but now that I have space and time, I can’t remember what it was. The best ideas always seem to come when I’m in the shower or driving – basically when it’s impossible to make a note.

Oh yeah, I was going to pick your hive mind about the flu vaccine. Mostly I’m all for vaccines, and herd immunisation, but for some reason, I’ve always had a bit of a bee in my bonnet about the flu jab. How much protection does it give? I think my skepticism comes from knowing that there are so many different strains of flu, and it can mutate so quickly what’s the point, but I’m willing to be won round by a good argument.

This comes on the back of being called for an appointment. I’m not going to lie, I was scandalized when it came through, because “only old or sick people get called for that, right”? My nose was put right out of joint! Then, I had to have a word with myself, pushing 50 and with a compromised immune system I probably fall under both categories, my mental self-image has been kicking a tin can down the road in a huff ever since.

This has not been helped by me finally admitting that I also need reading glasses.

A slight bonus is that Mr. Plot tells me I have a new “scary thing” (this is good, but I wonder what the ‘old scary thing was). I thought it (new scary thing) was looking over the top of my glasses since I only need them for close up stuff. But no; the scary thing is if we are ‘talking’ and I  pause, take them off, put them in their case and snap it shut. Apparently, this is enough to put the fear of God into him, the two dogs and anyone else in the vicinity. Result!

  Are you ready for the Halloween holidays? Do you even get off? I’ve taken three days leave so that I can be off with the boys, who are not impressed that I haven’t decorated the house yet. I mean seriously? Decorated? I haven’t even tidied the house yet never mind decorated it, mind you if it’s just a case of tattered blinds, dead flowers, and giant spiders, we are all set. And while we are on the subject, can I just say that spiders not liking Horse Chestnut is a complete myth, I’ve watcher the buggers hide from the dogs in a pile of freshly collected conkers.

A previous attempt at carving a pumpkin with the boys

Anyway, I imagine that will all be rectified later today, we’ll have the place looking like Freddy Kruger’s holiday home by teatime.

We are deep in pre-AQE angst at the moment. What’s the AQE? It’s an exam that 10/11-year-old children in Northern Ireland sit, which determines their post-primary school, with scores determining being labeled as a success or a failure aged 11 Grammar or State Schools depending on how well you do.

It’s a tricky time, we are trying to balance getting No 1 Cub into a place where he can give his best performance, without putting him under too much pressure. No 1 Cub thinks he can just breeze through, no problem – so why can’t he spend all of his time between now and the exam on X-Box?  It’s so unfair! 

  Do you have plans over the next week or so? I have a couple of things I’m looking forward to. All being well, I will get making my Christmas Cake with my mate. We finally did this last year, after talking about it for maybe the previous three Christmases and we had a hoot. I had the kitchen all decked out like Nigella, and, since we were following her cake recipe, we got dressed up in frocks and pinnies. So far so good. I thought it might be appropriate to have cocktails too, so I made a pitcher full of rocket fuel Espresso Martini.

How we managed to successfully bake two cakes while we were three sheets to the wind is the mystery of last Christmas, but somehow we did. Round two is imminent.

Absolutely lethal Espresso Martini!

It’s actually not a bad Christmas Cake, under the circumstances

And that’s about it for now. I’ve been thinking about some topics to blog about, but it’ll involve a trip or two to County Antrim, Mr Plot will need to make sure his visa is up to date, they may not let a Bangorian in. Maybe I’ll try a post in proper Ulster-Scots someday too, see if any of you can understand it.

Plot x

          If we were having coffee… 25/10/19 If we were having coffee this week, first of all, how are you? I probably haven't seen you in ages.

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If we were having coffee

If we were having coffee

It’s so long since I last wrote anything, I’m forgetting how to do this. So I thought I’d have a go at one of those “if we were having coffee” type posts. If we werehaving coffee, first, I would congratulate you on coaxing me out of the house, and secondly I’d ask if there was any chance of having the caffeine intravenously? No? Pity, I might go nose first into my Americano in that case. Man I am…

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Swimming Wild

If you read Dipping a Toe in the Water, my Introduction to Coastal Rowing, you’ll know that recently I’ve been getting in touch with the wetter part of the sea-shore, having taken up (and loving) our coastal rowing . All that exhilaration has given me the confidence to try something else, namely a bit of wild swimming round the Bangor coastline.

As I’ve mentioned, as a kid, the shore was my…

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A Reason to Love Social Media

I had the chance to meet up with someone i’ve Met through blogging, and it was lovely. Cherie is just how I imagined, these are her thoughts – obviously head on over to Cherie’s site to comment and enjoy the rest of her blog, she’s a hoot (look out for her nursing memories)

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Dipping a Toe in the Water, my Introduction to Coastal Rowing

Dipping a Toe in the Water, my Introduction to Coastal Rowing

Beautiful Cornish Pilot Gigs, all ready for race day

I grew up by the sea. I’ve spent my entire life, bar my (landlocked) university years, living by the sea, but to my great chagrin, I have spent virtually no time actually on it. 

Oh I rockpool with the best of them. I can happily tell my bladderwrack from my corallina, I can point out periwinkles and dog welks; I’ve tickled sea anemones and…

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The Ballad of Boris & Arlene

Our illustrious Prime Minister has been in town. Meeting The DUP, doing deals to shore up his majority, and maybe he will plug a hole in the listing HMS United Kingdom. Or it might just be a load of de Pfiffle

There’s so much in politics that goes on under the surface, it got me thinking; imagining and then an idea took shape, inspired by the late, great Victoria Wood. Do you remember the Ballad…

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Open Season at Royal Portrush

Open Season at Royal Portrush

The 148th Open Championship at Royal Portrush Northern Ireland

I’m not a golfer, I’ve hit a few balls off a driving range the odd time, but thats about it, and I don’t usually watch it on TV either. Yet as I’m writing this on a Saturday morning, I’m still in my PJ’s on the sofa, curtains are drawn to block the sunshine, avidly watching The Open which has returned to Royal Portrush after 68 years.