sorrowsz - Tumblr blog

[sorrowsz]

Anyone else go through disordered eating phases? Like some months I can eat normally and some I'll hate myself for eating above 500 calories in a day lmao

[sorrowsz]

30 Day Thinspo Challenge

I'm just gonna get this over with in one post lmao

Day 1: Your stats

My cw is 120 lbs which I think is the highest it's ever been? I don't get to weigh myself often lol

Day 2: How tall are you, do you like your height?

I'm like 5'5 or 5'6 so pretty average. I'm ok with it but I kinda wish I was taller lol

Day 3: A picture of your thinspo. What features do you like about this person?

Jack is goals tbh I mean just look at those arms. perfect

Day 4: Your greatest fears about weight loss

I'm kinda worried what happens after I get to my gw, like it's not too far away but I'm not just gonna go back to eating regularly when I get to it? Idk

Day 5: Why do you want to lose weight? Are you doing it for you?

I just want skinny legs tbh. I am doing it for myself, but I'd be lying if I said other people's opinions of me/my looks didn't matter to me. I miss the skinny nicknames lmao

Day 6: Do you binge? If so, explain why you think you do.

Yep, after I start restricting for too long I'll just devour everything in the refrigerator even if it makes me feel like absolute shit.

Day 7: Do your parents know you're trying to lose weight? Do they care?

Oh hell no. Idk if they would really care, but it's way too embarrassing bc I've been trying to lose weight for years now and I've only gained since then. I'm a failure lmao

Day 8: Your workout routine

I don't really have a routine, I just have a playlist of some different workouts to choose from. I don't even do it that often tbh I'm lazy (gonna start doing it nightly though!)

Day 9: Did people ever make comments about your weight in a negative way?

Idk about negative but I've been told my legs are getting big by family. Another family member also told me they were fat lmao

Day 10: What was the hardest thing you gave up during this weight loss?

The ability to eat without counting calories lmao

Day 11: Your fav. thinspo blog and why.

I don't really have one rn. I spend so much time scrolling through this shit but I just kinda move on from one to the other

Day 12: What do you normally eat?

I've been living off instant rice noodles recently. 200 cal for a packet and it's so filling when drowned in water. Add a poached egg and you have some gourmet shit

Day 13: Are you losing weight in a healthy or unhealthy way?

Both ig? I used to do it more healthily but this recent dip back into being obsessed with getting skinny has been the worst so far lmao.

Day 14: What's your UGW? When do you expect to reach it?

Rn it's 96 lbs. I certainly could get there by the end of the year but knowing me I probably won't. A bitch can dream. A bitch can also undo a week's worth of progress in one day.

Day 15: Are you vegan or vegetarian? If so, has this helped you to lose weight? If no, do you ever consider turning vegan or vegetarian?

I tried veganism out a few years ago, but I'd never go back to it. I don't need stress dreams of accidentally eating meat or dairy products and binging. Fuck the cows tbh

Day 16: When did you first decide to lose weight?

I actually don't know. I have memories of trying to stop eating altogether and then binging on uncrustables from when I was younger, but I only really got into calorie counting like 2-3 years ago?

Day 17: Do you have an ED?

Nah but I certainly relate to the ed side of tumblr more than the dieting subreddits I used to subscribe to. Idk at what point you're allowed to say you have an eating disorder but I definitely have some disordered eating going on lol

Day 18: What food is your weakness?

Avocados and oil. Oil scares the living shit out of me, jesus. Why does there have to be so many calories in such a small amount??? And I love avocados but I just can't look at them the same anymore lmao

Day 19: When was the last time you ate fast food?

Idk the last time but my family gets it pretty often. I used to use it as an excuse to binge but once you learn the low cal options it isn't rlly scary anymore

Day 20: Fav. diet

I don't really go by any specific diets, I just try to stay under a specific amount of calories

Day 21: What are your clothing sizes?

Idk at this point. It varies too much depending on the brand so I just try shit on and don't pay attention to the size

Day 22: What was your lowest weight? How and why did you gain?

Maybe like 8 lbs? Idk I don't much remember being a baby tbh

Day 23: Did the media play a role in your wanting to lose weight?

Ofc lmao

Day 24: How do you feel about the terms pro-ana/pro-mia?

I definitely don't like them lmao. I may be a bit hypocritical here as I spend so much time reading that shit, but it's different when it comes to other people ya know. I kinda worry just making posts like this is pro-ana? But like I can't talk to anyone else about it and I kinda need a secret vent acc so idk

Day 25: Have you ever purged? If so, describe your first experience.

I've tried, but I just. can't. I rarely ever vomit and honestly I think I'd rather fast it off than go through that. I wish I could just make myself do it but I keep removing my fingers once I gag

Day 26: What excites you most about reaching your UGW?

There's this cute two piece beach set I've had in my Amazon cart for so long that I'll finally be able to wear without hating myself. Hopefully lmao I may still be fat by then

Day 27: How do you deal with being around food?

I fucking love food. It's so hard for me to turn it down which is why I'm in this mess in the first place

Day 28: Do you want that gap between your legs (thigh gap)? Why?

Uh yeah. Idk why aside from that's what I was taught is attractive lmao. We live in a society tbh

Day 29: Your definition of beauty.

This one is difficult for me to answer. I want to be skinny but I don't think everyone does in order to be considered beautiful. Different people are just beautiful in different ways lol

Day 30: 10 facts about you!

I'm 16, female, my favorite director is either wes anderson or bergman (ik how this sounds lmao), uhh. Idk that's all you get lmao