soshitan - Tumblr blog

[soshitan]

no matter how terrible my day is. i can always end my day in bed imagining fictional characters making out sloppy style and fucking raw. and that's beautiful. there's some good in this world mister frodo and it's worth fighting for

[soshitan]

...I found the “girl falls into middle earth” fic I wrote when I was 11

[soshitan]

It puzzles me when people cite LOTR as the standard of “simple” or “predictable” or “black and white” fantasy. Because in my copy, the hero fails. Frodo chooses the Ring, and it’s only Gollum’s own desperation for it that inadvertently saves the day. The fate of the world, this whole blood-soaked war, all the millennia-old machinations of elves and gods, comes down to two addicts squabbling over their Precious, and that is precisely and powerfully Tolkien’s point. 

And then the hero goes home, and finds home a smoking desolation, his neighbors turned on one another, that secondary villain no one finished off having destroyed Frodo’s last oasis not even out of evil so much as spite, and then that villain dies pointlessly, and then his killer dies pointlessly. The hero is left not with a cathartic homecoming, the story come full circle in another party; he is left to pick up the pieces of what was and what shall never be again. 

And it’s not enough. The hero cannot heal, and so departs for the fabled western shores in what remains a blunt and bracing metaphor for death (especially given his aged companions). When Sam tells his family, “Well, I’m back” at the very end, it is an earned triumph, but the very fact that someone making it back qualifies as a triumph tells you what kind of story this is: one that is too honest to allow its characters to claim a clean victory over entropy, let alone evil. 

“I can’t recall the taste of food, nor the sound of water, nor the touch of grass. I’m naked in the dark. There’s nothing–no veil between me and the wheel of fire. I can see him with my waking eyes.”

So where’s this silly shallow hippie fever-dream I’ve heard so much about? It sounds like a much lesser story than the one that actually exists.

[soshitan]

START vs END

Happy Birthday, Bilbo and Frodo Baggins! 09.22.17

Please, please do not repost on this site or other sites, print with the intent of profit or distribute these illustrations without the explicit consent of myself, the artist. Wallpaper can be found here and here.

[soshitan]

Nanami <3

[soshitan]

God how much I miss him😭😭

[soshitan]

This was truly our jujutsu kaisen

[soshitan]

(Possible jjk manga spoiler)

My screen time says I’ve spent around 36 hours on tumblr every week the last 2 months. (Edit: last week it was 50 hours) Pinterest is catching up and TikTok is sadly in second place. The reason why?

Well here it is:

Anime Gojo Satoru is beautiful and perfect, but manga Gojo Satoru is more cheeky and handsome in another way. Honestly can’t wait for the rest of the manga to get animated.

And I swear to God Gege better find a way to bring my cute little pookiebear back, or mappa just milk every single Gojo scene and make OVA’s and some fillers with him!!!

[soshitan]

Overcoming the slightest challenge of my day: “This is just like the Odyssey.”

[soshitan]

I am a child

Rain covered highways and smoke filled bars

I allow myself to get lost in their rhythm—entrapped by their familiarity

I am a child

Except that I am not

From infant to adult— I've only known pain and confusion

Things are because they must be

Who am I to deny my purpose?

Dad is inconsistent

Frantic and hazy

The smell of whiskey and bourbon follow him—cling to his skin as his harsh words ring in my ears

I have a duty

To him

To my brother

To my mother

One is dead

One is dead inside

One tries so hard to survive me, us

And I?

I've been dead since I was four

Cultivating the perfect mask of swagger and mirth to hide the black hole that rests beneath my chest

I am pain and beauty

He told me I had to so I must

I hate who I am

I despise who he has become

My mother left us in bright orange flames

My soul rests with her remains

I am an adult

I bask in the glow of red traffic lights and for once I am still

I listen to the sounds that allow me to pretend that—just for a moment

I am a child

4 years old and hugging my mother

Dad smiles at me and we all gaze down upon my brother—bassinet of white lace

I am a child and I am happy

-AM

[soshitan]

From Perdition

Deserving is not a word I ever associated with myself

I begged for a savior—sobbed for an end

I did not think anyone was listening

I am a man—an instrument of destruction

I've only known wrath, duty, and decay

I was impure and you saved me

I am sin incarnate and you raised me

I push aside the dirt from my grave and I stare at the motionless sky

I am alive

But I don't deserve it

Who are you?

My savior

Who are you to decide I am worthy?

These hands that tortured and maimed now grasp desperately at my body risen—shaking in their disbelief

I am forgiven

-AM

[soshitan]

15 years ago today, my life forever changed for reasons I can’t talk about due to the SAG-AFTRA strike. I don’t miss the squibs or the sparks sizzling in my hair as they rained down on me, but I miss looking into the mirror and seeing that guy looking back.

[soshitan]

so whatd you think 👁️👁️

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[soshitan]

[soshitan]

ppl in the age of cell phones: fucking up their necks

ppl in the age of books: fucking up their necks

ppl in the age of textile art: fucking up their necks

ppl in the age of picking lice: fucking up their necks

ppl in the age of cooking: fucking up their necks

[soshitan]