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hillary clinton as a teenager

idk a person: alright, hillary, what's your response to trump's statement?

hillary: yassss

idk a person: so you agree to legalize pot?

hillary: hey maybe you should chillary and stop asking me questions

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Vanilla Frappucino

in case you don’t know, i work at starbucks as a barista. so here’s a vanilla frappe recipe i guess

your preferred coffee brand (however much you want)

milk (at least until it’s a slightly lighter brown color)

sugar (4 tbs)

vanilla extract (2 tsp)

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life advice

on halloween, whenever there’s a ‘take one’ bowl lying on someone’s porch, take one

bowl

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HOLY SHIT

I WAS WATCHING SPONGEBOB WITH MY LITTLE SISTER AND THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT THE KRABBY PATTY’S SECRET INGREDIENTS AND BASICALLY PLANKTON HAD MR. KRABS TRAPPED IN A TOILET?? PLANKTON HAD THE RECIPE FOR THE KRABBY PATTY, FLIPPING THE PAGES AS MR. KRABS KEPT WARNING HIM SAYING, “You won’t like what’s on the next page, I’m warnin’ ya.” AND WHEN PLANKTON TURNED THE PAGE THE MAIN INGREDIENT WAS PLANKTON

WHAT THE HELL

PEOPLE ARE TALKING ABOUT HOW THEY THINK ACTUAL CRAB MEAT IS MADE INTO THE KRABBY PATTIES BUT THEY WERE WRONG ALL THIS TIME 

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so this happened

my possible gf (idk it’s too complicated) was talking to her best friend and was talking about how her nephew lost a tooth and was freaking out about it because it was the first one he’d lost and i said, “Yeah, I saw the status update on DeviantArt.” and she quietly responded with an awkward “I was talking to (insert best friend name here because they know i have a tumblr and i don’t want her figuring out i posted this) and i felt like i actuALLY WANTED TO DIEEE 

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lin-manuel marimba 

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ayy uh

so if any of you guys have some creepy/disturbing videos, submit them to me because i’m doing a huge journal entry with some fucked-up videos and i can’t find any 

thanks

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bluestarrrr

(changed my style; enjoy the cringe)

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here’s something to eat when you’re bored af and alone

so when you’re starving or craving a gingerbread house or whatever just take some graham crackers and melt some cream cheese icing in the microwave for about a minute (be sure to stir the icing frequently)

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My Grandma Gets so Offended

Grandma: Ana, why did you just shut your bedroom door when I was in the hallway?

Me: I have a phobia to open doors; whenever I see one, I close it, sorry if I offended you.

Grandma: *Gasps* You don't love me! You just want to shut me out of everything!

Me, in contemplation of life: okay what the literal fuck just happened

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The Coke Curse

so every time i get a glass of coke, it always spills. either in the chair, floor, or especially on my keyboard and oml it's happening againnnwheufhwefnsdjcfbwd

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my sisters are adorable yet annoying

4 yr old sister: hey ana wanna with baby dolls with me??

me: *actually wants to be at least half of a role model to her sister* alright, sure.

4 yr old sister: great, you can have this one *hands me a baby doll with most of its hair chopped off, an arm missing, and permanent marker drawn all over its face

me: wow thanks