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GIVE ME ONE GOOD MOVIE KISS.
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with tears in my eyes, i begged you to stay. you said " hey man, i love you, but no fucking way ! " | ind. priv. sel. multi-muse.
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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PLEASE TAKE A MOMENT TO READ.
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alrighty dudes, dudettes, and everything in between. this is the last post i intend to ever make on tumblr, so listen up. in regards to the bullshit “callout” posted the other day:
CALLOUT, I GUESS, FOR DEVIL AND CO, BUT MOSTLY DEVIL BC LET’S FACE IT, WITHOUT THE SCREENSHOTS YOU PROVIDED, YOUR ARGUMENT FOR WHY WART IS A BAD PERSON IS “HE DAMAGED MY EGO OWO”. YOU SAID THIS WASN’T YOUR PROBLEM? WELL I’M MAKING IT YOUR PROBLEM, ASSHAT.
so let’s start w/ the screenshots in question. i haven’t read the callout, so idk what was used, but considering i had upwards of 5 people come to me and ask me if i was okay, i can take a guess. let the record show that all of the messages i sent to dev and norgie regarding wart was in the midst of our breakup, which was messy enough as is. when wart and i first broke up, i had dev and co blocked bc of personal reasons. devil then decided to HUNT DOWN ONE OF MY BLOGS and follow me (after i assume staking it out, bc he’s known for stalking people). i confronted him, and he gave me some shtick about how he’ll “always care about me” and i’m “still his little sister”, blah blah blah other manipulative bullcrap. against my better judgement, i let him back in.
wart was my first boyfriend. i adored him with everything i had, so naturally, this breakup left me in a bad emotional state. devil and norgie took COMPLETE ADVANTAGE OF THIS, and when i told them what happened between wart and i, immediately began twisting it to make wart out to be the bad guy. it was norgie who originally suggested that i had been emotionally abused, and in my vulnerable state, i began to see things that way. 
not that it’s anyone’s business, but if you wanna know how the breakup went, it was something like this: wart’s mental state was deteriorating, i suggested maybe we take a break, immediately went back on that statement, wart broke things off the next morning. there was no emotional abuse, no threatening of suicide, no physical violence - it was a breakup. things didn’t work out. it happens. but of course, this didn’t fit dev and co’s narrative, so they needed to get me to admit things were much worse than they were. when i later came to my senses and realized this was all bullshit, devil and norgie then decided to GUILT TRIP ME by pointing out how they spent “two hours” on call with me while i cried. after i had just had my heart broken. no shit i was upset. newsflash: wart spent a lot longer with me on call while i was breaking down. hell, he broke up with me and still let me cry on his shoulder. and unlike dev and norgie, he never once acted like i owed him, because that’s what friends do. but hey, go on and talk about how wart’s the abusive one.
devil has spent years abusing my trust. every time i tell him i don’t want so speak with him, he comes back awhile later with some new apology and reasoning for his behavior. and like most toxic relationships, it was hard to let him ago, especially after losing the person i cared most about. he blatantly took advantage of my situation to fuel his vendetta. the only reason i told him anything was because he promised me he wouldn’t make a post unless wart “stepped out of line” (which, looking back, is a huge red flag: what gives him the right to police other people?). and had i not begun to confront him about all the bullshit he made me say, he probably would have held off. in fact, he told me that one of the “main reasons” he felt this “needed to come out” was because i was starting to defend wart. when i realized that dev was serious about making this callout, i told him i wanted no part of it. he asked me for screenshots of some of my and wart’s conversations, to which i gave him a hard no. did that stop him from using our personal messages in his sorry excuse for a callout? of course not. these are the type of people who don’t care about anyone except themselves, dev has made that perfectly clear. MY PRIVACY AND AN INNOCENT MAN’S WELL BEING MEANT NOTHING TO HIM. all he and his friends cared about was spurring along their vendetta. and honestly, if i was wart, i would have sued y’all for harassment and defamation of character ages ago.
with the matter of those messages out of the way, let’s move on to dev’s actual claims. this is where the defamation gets real, because he had the nerve to call wart a predator. seriously? what, because he dated someone a few years younger than him?
dev loves to throw the word pedo.phile around, despite the fact that he obviously doesn’t know what it means. pedo.philia “is a psychiatric disorder in which an adult or older adolescent experiences a primary or exclusive sexual attraction to prepubescent children”. i started puberty when i was twelve, and wart and i didn’t even meet until i was fifteen. so immediately, he doesn’t fit the bill for a pedo.phile. #sorrynotsorry.
but let’s work around that. let’s say, that because he was romantically attracted to me, that automatically makes him a pedo.phile. i’m going to remind everyone of something devil would love to leave buried: the fact that, when i was thirteen, and again at fourteen, devil tried to coerce me into writing smut with him, along with a sixteen year old girl. he used my trust of him to assure me that it would be fine. his excuse? “my (ex)girlfriend made me do it.” cause that’s a solid argument alright. so fine, label wart a pedo.phile. i sure hope dev’s planning on giving himself the same label, because what he did is a lot worse lmao.
i don’t have screenshots from dev and my conversations, i think he deleted that account, but here’s him w/ the other girl.
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so yeah long story short: dev knew this girl was underage, still tried to smut with her. take my word that he tried with me, i guess. i don’t think he’s ever denied it.
now, admittedly, i didn’t need to bring this up, but according to devil it’s important that predators get called out, so...he brought this on himself.
now i’m going to tell y’all the story of how wart and i started dating, because it really puts a hole in this “predator” story. see, for wart to be a predator, he would have had to target me in some way (come to think of it, much like devil did to me). when wart and i got together, dev and i weren’t talking, and i never got around to telling him how this happened, only that it did. (if i did tell him, i forgot about it, and that makes it even worse bc he knows this already lmao.) 
it was may sixth. i was fifteen, wart was nineteen. we had been talking for awhile, and sometime in the past week or so, i had talked to my mom about liking this guy who was older than me. she told me about her own relationships with older guys when she was my age, and that so long as he didn’t try anything, she was fine with it. so on that spring day, i confessed my feelings to wart. and y’know the first thing he said to me? “wait a few years.” a logical statement, one i probably should have taken to heart, but i was a fool in love, so i didn’t. i spent the next hour or so convincing wart to go out with me, and he eventually pitied me enough (he’d admit to something along those lines not long after) to agree. neither of us expected this to become an actual relationship, but hey, a year and a half’s not a bad run.
to make a long story short: i asked wart out, not the other way around. i begged him to date me, not the other way around. and this wasn’t some secret relationship. my parents knew from the beginning, and gave it the okay.
i think i addressed everything in that lameass “callout”, but because dev’s The Worst, i know he’s going to pull at threads to try and get his “predator” accusations to stick. i’m going to post this, and devil will immediately reply “but wait!! he is a predator: you said you two slept together!!” and then post the message where i said exactly that, added some details to make it realistic, whatever, but then fail to post the message a few days later where i told him IT WAS A HALF-BAKED STORY.
see, after wart and i broke up, i heard rumors that he and i had been sleeping together when he was up here. i’m gonna shoot those rumors down right now. a) i’m asexual and sex repulsed. i wouldn’t sleep with someone if they paid me. devil and norgie know this, but they chose to ignore it in favor of a juicy story. b) the story i gave them was incredibly inconsistent. to the point where even devil pointed out my inconsistencies, but then conveniently forgot that ever happened, then, when i told him it was bullshit, TRIED TO INSIST IT WAS TRUE. as if he knows better than i do what happened lmao. c) wart and i were never alone for more than a few minutes. my bedroom walls aren’t exactly soundproof. my bed frame is metal, it squeaks whenever i sit on it. so yeah, obviously we got away with having sex. dumbass.
now, when i heard these rumors, i decided to roll with them. what did i have to lose, right? so yeah, i spiced it up, gave devil and norgie some random details to make it realistic, and told them not to tell anyone (which as far as i know, they haven’t, so thanks for not spreading rumors i guess). when devil brought it up to me during his rant about how this callout “needed to happen”, i pretty much laughed in his face and told him it never happened. and then he tried insisting it did and i rolled my eyes so hard i think i gave myself a headache. 
tl;dr: someone started rumors that wart and i slept together, i confirmed them for shits and giggles, but no, it never happened, for all the reasons stated above.
oh, and as for dev’s reason for this vendetta? he’s told wart that it was because he (wart) wrote a character that dev wanted to write. i’m still convinced it’s over a fragile ego. either way, Real Mature, dude.
NOW i think i covered anything. phew, that’s a doozy. as i said, this is the last post i intend to ever make on this hellsite, but i encourage everyone who sees this to reblog it so that we can clear a (mostly) innocent man’s name. did wart hurt me? yes. was it enough to warrant this abuse?? not in the slightest.
my discord is still on my blog if anyone wants it (unless you’re friends with devil, norgie, kirby, or anyone else involved in this. if that’s the case, i’ll see you in hell). as for my legacy on this hellsite, let it be known that i tried to fight the good fight. i hope it’s good enough.
el psy kongroo.
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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@ohireath​ > messaged : It was undoubted that she was nervous, both hands trembling as she called out his name. ❛  I - Ikki …  ❜ there was a small envelope within her hands ; going against the grain it was a dark shade of blue with cursive in white and ontop a blue rose was offered to her boyfriend. ❛  I - I was able to talk to Kent and Waka to g - give you the day off and I was … well, I have two tickets to the aquarium … it’s a bit of a train ride since but … I’d really like to go with you .  ❜ Heavens, she had even gone to an extra length by wearing something a little cuter than normal, a little bit of makeup and her hair tied up with ringlets bouncing from their hold. <
               the spade would look up from his phone when he heard his name called, head canted slightly to the side. truth be told, he was very confused when waka called him up and told him to stay at home ( he had to hold the phone away from his ear, the manager was yelling so loud ), kent having said he'd TAKE OVER HIS SHIFT, but suddenly it was all making sense. so, ashley had SOMETHING TO DO WITH THIS, did she? well, as okay as he was with skipping out on work, he did want to know why she was so adamant on it — until she produced that envelope, and he smiled, gingerly taking it, careful not to ruin the beautiful writing as he opened it.
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               " an aquarium? " what was so exciting about a bunch of fish, anyway? ( ah, but there was beauty in it, he'd admit. besides, she REALLY WANTED TO GO; who was he to deny her? ) ikki would put the tickets back in the envelope, tucking it into his jacket before giving a curt nod. " i'd love to go with you, ash. perhaps we can get dinner afterwards? MY TREAT. " it was valentine's day...did she have something else planned? well, regardless, and even with his offer to pay for dinner, he'd be sure to get her something special for white day.
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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@chaotiix​ > messaged : (from Aya to Himegil) “I actually stayed up all night making this perfect enough for you so.. I hope it’s good enough for you.” In her hands was a pretty red heart-shaped box, filled with chocolates she had made herself. Not exactly the finest in the world, but the finest she herself could make. “just.. don’t laugh if they look.. weird.” <
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               the queen would eye this HEART-SHAPED BOX curiously, as if she didn't know what it was, but accepted it nonetheless with a smile. " you should have more faith in yourself, girl. " but 'pon opening the box, she suddenly understood; she wasn't entirely sure if some of these were HEARTS OR OVALS, but she supposed it really was the thought that counts. " ah...well, no matter. i'm sure they TASTE FINE. " a ' thank you ' would suffice, hime...well, nevertheless, that was her own form of gratitude.
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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@ryogai​ > messaged : “Enkidu, I brought you a Valentine’s gift!” Nix had been looking for the Lancer all day and finally found them. So while she had the chance, she held out a box that contained some chocolate covered strawberries. “Thank you for all the help.” <
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               admittedly, 'pon noticing that all the other servants were getting gifts, enkidu felt a tad bit envious, thinking themself forgotten by the silver-haired master — alas, perhaps they their tendency to stay back was their downfall in this case, as the moment the two made eye contact, nix ran up to them, offering a nice box that surely held something delectable inside. of course, they would try one without hesitation, eyes lighting up as they shoved the rest of the strawberry into their mouth ( they occasionally forgot their manners, do forgive them ), before offering the girl a bright smile " they're delicious, master! i do adore strawberries, SWEET AND TART all at once — thank you very much! " they pause for a moment, then let out a laugh, " we're supposed to get you something in return next month, correct? gilgamesh and i will be sure to REPAY YOUR KINDNESS IN FULL, i can assure you of that. "
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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@ryogai​ > messaged : "I know this custom might be strange to you but I wanted to give you a present regardless to express my thanks, Ninsun. So um.. Please accept these chocolates and Happy Valentine's day!" Nix presented the goddess with some white chocolates that held raspberry filling. <
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               the concept of valentine's day, though new to her, was not unknown; the giving of CHOCOLATES AND FLOWERS to those you hold dear was a sweet tradition that she found herself adoring, if anything because of the meaning behind it. the goddess would accept her gift with glee, a warm smile overtaking fair countenance. " thank you, master! they look absolutely magnificent. did you make these yourself? — such a talented master you are. " a gentle ruffling of silver locks would be given as appreciation, alongside an offer to share the chocolates. after all, that's what this day was about, right? being CLOSE TO PEOPLE? surely the treats would be more enjoyable with someone else.
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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@ryogai​ > messaged : "Gilgamesh, I have a Valentine's gift for you!" Nix happily approached the Archer and held out a small gold colored box, tied closed with a red ribbon. Inside were some handcrafted chocolates with an orange filling. She only hoped it would be to his tastes since he was hard to please at times. "Thank you for everything." <
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                crimson hues focused on the girl as she spoke, before glancing down at the golden box she held in her hands. he had begun to truly understand, by this point, valentine's day, and what made it so special for people. though he still felt it somewhat unnecessary, it seemed to mean a lot to nix, particularly if she spent so long making chocolates for everyone, and he would respect that. the king would accept her offering, pleased with her choice of chocolates, before summoning forth two glasses of wine from his gate and offering one to her. " you're catching on, girl. do keep it up. — now, then, perhaps you would care to join me? after all of this, you must be tired; take a moment to relax, ENJOY SOME CHOCOLATE. you earned it, certainly. "
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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               " these guys can pretend to be a ' boy band ' all they want; everyone knows that the people want CUTE IDOL GIRLS, not overly emotional boys. so, like...SUCK IT. "
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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dekirukoto replied to your post:                “ what, pray tell, is going on? ”...
we started a boyband!
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               " a...alright?....why is he crying? "
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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               " what, pray tell, is going on? " why is shirou crying??
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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Send me ✍️ + a muse, and I’ll try my hand at writing as them
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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♗ surprise me ( if you want !! )
ICONS!
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so fun fact:1) this style is what i use for my rin tohsaka icons, bc i didn’t like any other psds with suzaku2) i’ve never actually…seen code geass ajsodjiasf
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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Send me a  ♗ and I’ll use my icon style to make an icon of your muse
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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               icarus’ shoudler blades. prometheus’ calloused hands. demeter in the wet dark of night searching. hephaestus and his tumbled bones. eurydice walking close behind, so close you can feel the heat of her breath on the back of your neck.
   the gods tell us there are no salves for the soul, but still we never stop trying to find one.
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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i’ve never found being ‘ self destructive ’ to be worrisome someone, some time, is going to ( DESTROY ) you & i will be DAMNED if anyone but myself��has that honor
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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Gilgamesh. | Enkidu.
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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Enkidu. | Gilgamesh.
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spaedia · 5 years ago
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And if you’re in love, then you are the lucky one, ‘Cause most of us are bitter over someone.
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