sparringistraining

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The wounded child inside many males is a boy who, when he first spoke his truths, was silenced by paternal sadism, by a patriarchal world that did not want him to claim his true feelings.

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Giuseppe Penone’s hand is so strong, it can squeeze trees. I’m talking about his bronze sculpture of a hand, of course. This Italian artist installed it onto a tree in Nasher Sculpture Center, Dallas, in 1968, and it’s even more spectacular after many decades have passed.

The “Continuerà a crescere tranne che in quel punto” (“It Will Continue to Grow Except at this Point”) was made from a cast of the artist’s actual hand and lower arm. Giuseppe attached in onto a sapling, and throughout the years the tree would thicken around the metal. Now, it looks like that hand is stretching the bark with its fingers. (Source)

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Brotox

Recently, a friend asked me to write a post about toxic masculinity. That is where by acting out the drama of being a man, people shut themselves off to emotions that make them appear unmanly. The emotions that remain available to a person in that condition are happy and angry. Over time, as things go toxic, happy gets squeezed out.  Although this kind of toxicity is terrible for the person living it, it can be even worse for those around them, because when a person can’t feel emotions they also can’t recognize those emotions in others. That creates a self-centeredness and lack of empathy that leads to all kinds of harm.

This inability to recognize and feel a full range of emotions in toxic masculinity is similar to people who get botox injections in their faces. When a face can’t form the expression of an emotion the emotion fades. They don’t feel it and don’t recognize it in others. Botox affects a limited number of people, Brotox is global problem.

The problem of toxic masculinity is that it is embedded in most cultures around the world. Everybody drinks from those cultural Kool-Aids and carry beliefs about how men should be stoic and strong and they praise or forgive anger. These beliefs feed into violence in the home and around the world. People of all genders can be attracted to men who display even toxic manly qualities. The problem grow unchecked.

Mindfulness can help you respond to all kinds of toxicity. If you can practice recognizing brotox injections in your culture, you can notice many commonly held beliefs about masculinity and see which ones you agree with and which ones seem wrong to you. You can notice your opinions about men who don’t fit the cultural mold and separate your own examined beliefs from those unexamined beliefs of your culture. Practicing mindfulness and awareness of toxic attitudes, may not save the world form it’s violent, self-destructive impulses, but it might, and it will certainly help you interact with people who get stuck in their ideas of being what they should be instead of exploring who they are. Mindfulness is like a mask that can protect you from breathing the toxic air of anger cultures. You can always use mindfulness to cultivate your own peace, which vastly improves your own life. Breathe in anger, breathe out compassion. 

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Happy 8th Birthday Blue Ivy

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“You can be the most powerful witch in the land, but you will always have a weakness, and that will always make you believe you have no power when someone exploits it. There is no greater strength than the ability to understand and accept your own flaws.”

― Rin Chupeco, The Bone Witch

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You've been hit by, you've been struck by

Anxiety

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“I love you” isn’t what you think it looks like. It’s not romantic dates and holding hands. “I love you” is taking care of someone when they’re blackout drunk and throwing up “I love you” is popping back pimples and still kissing through the runny noses winter brings “I love you” is drooling during sex and laughing together “I love you” is being held while violently sobbing because of an anxiety attack “I love you” is discussing what your morning breath smells like with each other “I love you” is “I don’t want to but I will for you and only you.” It’s all the good and the bad and the gross and the beautiful and ugly things about life and embracing that in each other.

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Artistic Resume

TerpPoets:

Performed in front of ~30 people 

Native Roots:

Performed in front of ~65 people 

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TOTUS Proposal

TOTUS WEEK 

A week of events that are meant to market TOTUS to the surrounding campus community as well as involve past and current TOTUS members 

Tentative Schedule: 

Monday: TOTUS Community Service (Go to a halfway house, old persons home and do a writing workshop) 

Tuesday: TOTUS Happy Hour 

Wednesday: TOTUS Movie screening 

Thursday: TOTUS Juke Joint Takeover 

Friday: TOTUS Presents: The Awakening (bring out well known artists in the area, and have an atmosphere of creativity and networking) 

How?

In order to do this there would need to be work done during the summer, and the brunt of the work would have to be done by MICA. However, if it is opened to on campus organizations as well as the college of Arts and Humanities there would be less of a burden on MICA. Each event would have a committee that could include TOTUS alumni and current TOTUS participants. The Friday event could serve as a practicum for the TOTUS students. The event would occur once a year.

Materials/Funds 

This week of programming would need a lot of materials and funds. There would have to be rooms booked out each day (except for Thursday) and snacks/refreshments would have to be purchased. In addition AV for the rooms, and the rights to show whatever movie we decide to show. 

The Numbers

I project that this would reach out to a majority of the campus. College students love free activities and would love to participate. The Juke Joint Takeover would reach out to more than 200 people, due to the fact that is a standing event that many people attend. 

Determining Success

I would determine success by having an increased amount of people that come to programs throughout the week, as well as people who express interest into participating in the class, 

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The Story is Always the Same

Final Practicum 

Well, the story is always the same. Just like before I battled in the same war. The unending struggle of spoken versus written work. But this battle was different. The topic became an unwelcome aggressor. Turning my battle into two against one. I had no idea how I was doing to describe the stories of everyone, it seemed like all my creative juices had dried up and I couldn’t get a poem out as hard as I tried. 

I started a different poem, that died a swift death after the first line. I still was stuck. Until inspiration hit. What did all minority communities have in common: white people. White people have the impressive ability to take credit for work that they did not do. It was like the story was always the same. 

My first draft was good, but it was missing something (see, the story is always the same). So I just rewrote it, but to me it wasn’t finished. (Now that I look back that’s a good thing because our stories aren’t finished). 

When I first read it, it didn’t hit. It wasn’t powerful and my message wasn’t conveyed. Here presented a new battle, this wasn’t a poem that I could read I actually had to perform it. So I practiced, and practiced and practiced.\

Showtime. 

I’m actually running late. I’m supposed to go first and the basketball game has the traffic backed up from what seems to be Xfinity to North Carolina. I’m running up stamp hill in booties and make it in time to see my fellow classmate just finishing up. With no time to catch my breath, I’m ushered on stage and told to preform. 

It wasn’t bad. The lights blinded me and drowned out my nerves. It was me, and my words and I really hope I touched someone that day.