spirallingstarcases

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i feel like i just went streaking through some askboxes like a cryptid known for the Yearning

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If you had to sing a child to sleep RIGHT NOW what would you sing and it CANT BE a lullaby it has to be a regular song

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what they dont tell you about having younger mutuals is that you somehow become their older sibling

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hurr hurr I'm a human body hurr hurr I'm gonna solve all my problems using mucus

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12/8/22: decomposing vertebrae harboring algal growth.

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drove back down to seattle and it was like sleeper agent activation within me hello everynyan

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my partner is only 40 but nestled within him is the soul of an elderly man

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so what youre gonna wanna do is crush the garlic and ginger instead of just slicing it ok, it releases more of those good flavors. yoshi is going to eat me and turn me into an egg now, i love you. remember everything i taught you

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octopus 2022 wrapped

this year you disguised yourself as:

coral 10023 times

ocean floor 8064 times

coconut shell 244 times

various fish 196 times

scuba divers long lost wife 12 times

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coming back to show off my spotify wrapped like it's a particularly fucked up fish i caught in the local sewage lake

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Daily schedule:

Wake up on the problematic side of the bed

Eat a harmful breakfast

Log onto tumblr and reblog posts from abusive mutuals

Attend narcissistic classes

Watch an irredeemable movie

Listen to offensive music

Eat a cancelled dinner

Go to sleep derogatorily

Have dreams that will have aged poorly by the time I wake up

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they call it a headphone jack because you jack off to it. idk man

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the hat man

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mr beast being sued for labor violations then having his food brand discontinued for mold then being reported to the FBI and now being investigated for roughly $23M in crypto-related insider trading feels like the ultimate don’t stop the party

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