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BLOG MOVED

//This blog has been moved. For those who would like to follow me on my new blog, please ask becthegraywarden off anon or via fanmail.

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//Since more people than I expected liked that post, I’ll leave a link somewhere in this post for you guys.

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//Due to some circumstances, I’m currently working on moving blogs. Those of you who are interested in following, please like this post and I’ll send you a private message with the url.

[splendoremxaeternum-blog]

//Since more people than I expected liked that post, I'll leave a link somewhere in this post for you guys.

[splendoremxaeternum-blog]

//Due to some circumstances, I'm currently working on moving blogs. Those of you who are interested in following, please like this post and I'll send you a private message with the url.

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"...It's almost Christmas...."

And Hibiki's as lonely as ever this year. It's nothing new to him, to be alone on holidays or birthdays thanks to his parents always being busy. Still, he'd hoped this year would be different.

"Good thing I didn't bother decorating this year."

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whatever you end up doing, <3

//I don’t understand anon. I really don't.

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And the Shining One... Is supposed to be able to form limitless bonds, right? 

Yet in my time here I have constantly, and inadvertently, caused Hibiki's  bonds to be shattered. Whether it's through my own stubbornness, my pride, or my cowardice and need to be reassured by people that I won't be forgotten or replaced. It's childish of me but...after thinking about why it's been so hard for me to write stuff for Hibiki, the only conclusion I can come to is that I'm childishly afraid of losing people and that makes it hard for me to channel him when he was willing to be forgotten by the people who he thought of as family in order for the restoration of Earth.

My muse is...unhappy with me and honestly it's right of him to be. I'm angry with myself because I believe it to be best to not talk to people when I'm upset and that turns out to be the worst possible option. And yet I still repeat the cycle over and over. Like insanity. 

....I don't know if any of the people I've pushed away or lost due to my own failings will read this or even care but... I'm so sorry. I do want to be a good person. It's what I've always wanted to be ever since I was a child and watched Sailor Moon. But... I don't have the ability or knowledge on how to be one. I'm easily angered. I get jealous and scared when I think people prefer others to me. I cry a lot. And sometimes I lash out when angry and scared and hurt. ...And I know it's wrong but... my instinct is to keep from getting hurt and I hate that I've been conditioned to hurt others before getting hurt myself. My old tae kwon do instructor would be so ashamed of me if he could see me now and I've accepted that. 

I want to change. I want to be worthy of writing my most precious muse again. But now...I don't know if I'll ever be worthy of him again. And I'm so, so, so very sorry. 

To everyone...

Tá mé chomh-leithscéal agus tá súil agam lá amháin is féidir liom a athrú go leor chun a maite.

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"Sheesh..."

Today's been so quiet.

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Even in the midst of so much snow, one could easily spy signs of life if they were observant enough. Every so often there would be the short trill of a bird to break the stillness of the winter air. Perhaps it was because of these small signs of life that Hibiki was able to appreciate winter all the more.

Despite the stillness, however, the demon tamer did not notice the other's approach until he spoke. 

The small smile that had been in place from the observation of the snow now grew into a genuinely happy one as the blue-eyed boy turned to smile at the very familiar man. After all, he could never forget the person before him or feel anything but joy at seeing him.

"Alcor, hey. I do, actually, enjoy winter a lot. It's nice to have everything quiet for once. Makes it easier to think, you know? How about you?"

  — ; Winter. The season often accompanied with the thought of death, but also the bringer of new life once passed. There was something about this season that caught the man’s intrigue throughout the years he had watched humanity grow and prosper.

                   Perhaps it was the beauty of the white flakes that blanketed                              the city.                                      Perhaps it was the joy that the season brought                                                to certain individuals.

                   Whichever the case, Alcor looked at it with a kind eye.

   As gaze peered out of long lashes, the male paused, focusing on one individual in particular. The particular hood spotted belonged to one particular individual the star found himself most drawn to. It seemed the Shining One was also rather fond of this kind of season—or at least, the snow.

   With smile adorning his features, the white-haired male made his way to where the raven stood. A gentle tone accompanied shortly after as he addressed this person in particular.

   "Ah, Shining One. How pleasant it is to see you are enjoying yourself. Do you particularly enjoy this season?"

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ship: ew / nonono / maybe / ship it / brotp / aww / otp / MY HEART

Send me a ship:

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"...Did the guy with the ugly cowl do something weird? I think he did something weird."

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HI HELLO MINI PSA: please know that whether you reply in an hour or in a week or even in a month and then some every time you keep one of our threads going it makes me smile. thank you for putting a little bit of your time and energy into writing with me. it’s honestly such a pleasure to rp with you.