you're not gonna want to follow this blog it's just me whining and being annoying and selfish. anyone who messages this blog or follows will be blocked. sorry......
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someone: hey are you okay
me, with the urge to shove three million knives into my head and throw myself off the Empire State Building: yeah why do you ask
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Do you ever get in one of those moods where you really hope someone will try to hurt you so you can lash out and attack back because you’re incredibly angry about being a victim but you’d never hurt anyone without a valid reason and you’re so mad that you never really fought back in the past with anything and it’s eating you alive and you just want to prove that you’re not someone anyone should fuck with anymore
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*eyes snap open at 3:47am* i’m unlovable
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i havent written here in a while
a lot has happened
and theres a lot on my mind
i dont really know how to feel
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[AGGRESSIVELY APOLOGIZES FOR BEING A BAD FRIEND AND AN UNPLEASANT PERSON TO BE AROUND]
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wow fuck
I just looked at myself in the mirror
I’m so fucking big
so. big.
how did I let this happen. I was doing well.
but now I’m back at square one.
I’m so fucking disgusting.
I know I’ll get there. eventually.
it’s just hard. so fucking hard.
I hope you’re having a better night.
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hhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn christmas eve hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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im permanently emotionally damaged but it’s chill, I’m chill
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