spqrmyths - Tumblr blog

[spqrmyths]

why are all these modern aus for the Odyssey set in a high school. where's the retelling where Odysseus is just a guy lost in an airport who keeps missing his connecting flights home due to a comical series of delays and disgruntled airline employees

[spqrmyths]

hearing a song you really like on the radio just hits different than streaming it. same with catching a movie you really like on cable just as it's starting. streaming services will never be able to capture this very specific kind of simple joy

[spqrmyths]

no i am not immune to early 2000s pop-punk music that fucks a little harder than everyone likes to admit

[spqrmyths]

Here's the thing about Jareth from Labyrinth right?

He's made up.

That's not necessarily the same thing as not REAL. But he, just like all her friends who show up in her room before her adventure as toys and figurines, exist in relation to her, in response to what she wanted and needed. She told the story and there he was, there he always had been. But she's a teenage girl who doesn't know what she wants yet, and Jareth kind of pays the price.

"but the king of the goblins had fallen in love with the girl, and had given her certain powers." He's an archetypal oxymoron. He's both the dastardly baby stealing villain and the royal love interest trying to relieve the heroine's suffering, Cinderella style. He's fucked either way by being both. She doesn't know if SHE wants to be the villain or the heroine until he shows up and then she decides on the heroine, so he has to sneer and menace and challenge but it's too late for him!! it's too late, The King Of The Goblins Had Fallen In Love With the Girl, he's Cinderella's prince too and he has to try, he gives her a poofy dress and takes her to fucking goblin prom, sweeps her around the room like a music box with perfect posture and room for Jesus.

But it doesn't work buddy, it can't work. You're just a story for a teen girl to grow up in, and as the villain you have to be defeated. He's so complex because his tropes contradict themselves, and he doesn't understand why he has to lose when he was only doing the job he was given. In his last scene he is pale as death with shadows under his eyes, backing away and begging for his happy ending with nonsense mishmash promises that belong to both halves of him.

"I am exhausted from living up to your expectations of me." I'm sure you are, Jareth. No wonder.

[spqrmyths]

no i am not immune to early 2000s pop-punk music that fucks a little harder than everyone likes to admit

[spqrmyths]

I let myself rest and now I'm daydreaming about academia and academic research and writing again

[spqrmyths]

I am utterly captivated by this video series that Taryn Delanie and friends have been making on TikTok

[spqrmyths]

there's no temptress quite as irresistible as the mid afternoon sleepies

[spqrmyths]

Every line in this video is iconic

[spqrmyths]

do NOT feel bad abt scarfing down a tub of raspberries. there is NO reason at all to ration them like other delicious treats bc they WILL mold as soon as theyre out of your line of sight

[spqrmyths]

As a kid, I was really upset that Bill Watterson wouldn't license Calvin & Hobbes so I could have plushies or so there would be a Saturday morning cartoon. Now, I realize his resistance is the reason we don't have a Calvin & Hobbes DreamWorks movie starring Chris Pratt.

[spqrmyths]

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

[spqrmyths]

is jake gyllenhaal gay??

why would you ask us, a narnia blog, this

[spqrmyths]

Happy pride month to the tiny cowboy and tiny Trojan man from Night at the Museum

[spqrmyths]

I'm always taken aback when someone asks me if I have a boyfriend because I've convinced myself so much that people perceive me as a sexless entity roaming the mortal world in search of something incomprehensible that I'm surprised the people around me see me as like.... a cishet

[spqrmyths]

I've been on tumblr so long that I just got breaking news from a source that wasn't the Destiel meme, and it felt surreal.

[spqrmyths]

It's end of May, yall know what that means