st4rgazerr

[st4rgazerr]

January 24, 2023

Hello mfs

I'm making music again. For funsies. I'm still new so im kaka poopoo at it. My friend did hop on one of our beats doe, pretty fire. He uploaded it to his main soundcloud account today. I hope he didn't do it out of pity :/. that would b cringe.

Off topic but my big toe hurts rn. idk why and i think it would be great if it would stop yk.

oh oh oh, i am now nonbinary!! I never felt like a girl enuf but im def not a dude. so im neither. yuh. Having a flat chest helps with that bc i can dress more "androgynous" i guess. But if given the option; i will gladly have big tits. (please give boobies). I start school again tm. Gotta grind this semester. I also need to get a part time job cuz i am BROKKEEE as fuck . esp cuz im tryna get my brother a pc for his birfday. Majoring psych is fun.

OK I think thats it for this entry. Who knows when i'll make another. Hi future chicken.

[st4rgazerr]

crazy

I feel crazy. I feel so unlikable. People tell me that i did nothing wrong yet im so unlikable. I can't maintain friendships and i've never been in a genuine relationship. I'm too overwhelming for guys. I hate that i feel too much but also feel nothing at all a while after. I wish i was normal. I wish i looked normal. I wish people weren't so embarrassed to be associated with me. I barely have friends. I hate that im crying while typing this. I hate that i can't goto anyone and vent. I hate that i do nothing with my time. I hate that i have no idea what im doing with my life. I hate that he doesn't want me. I hate that im too much for anyone to deal with.

I just desperately want to know what im doing wrong. Am i cringe? Am i weird? What fucking is it. People just...ugh.

I hate existing.

[st4rgazerr]

yuh