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I swear I hate her so much lmaoo

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День рождения сильного и независимого мужчины.

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We don’t even need a disney remake of Mulan. Look at this.

I would totally watch more Disney reboots if children from the actual ethnicities were cast in those movies.

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MYSTERY STORY TIME

So there was a single, solitary kiwi on our counter in the kitchen.

And I decided to make fun of my roommate for it, because who buys one, single, solitary kiwi? So I asked her that.

Roommate: I didn’t buy a kiwi.

Me: This isn’t your kiwi?

Roommate: No?

Me: But this isn’t my kiwi.

Roommate: That kiwi was there when I got home.

Me: I don’t even eat kiwi!

As you can see, it’s a real kiwi. Here it is, on my counter, giving away nothing.

But I was still confused as to where it came from. Did one of us accidentally buy a kiwi at the store? 

So I looked up the Kiwiny company to figure out which stores it’s sold at, to see which one of us might have bought it, since we tend to use different grocery stores.

Kiwiny doesn’t have American retailers.

There is literally no reason for this kiwi to be in my kitchen.

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ok but there was a bus filled with potatoes driving around my town today

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I mean who could win against that amazing strategy???

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