starless-ash - Tumblr blog

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balda gate

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i love lying and telling untruths it is one of my favorite activities

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i hope you all get to shake some ass this weekend (not me tho, i will be in my bedroom experiencing delusions)

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my chemical romance is in my blood forever and ever just like microplastics

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my lady of misery

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Tomorrow is the fiber fest and I really hope there's looms for sale so I can learn to weave and make fabric from my handspun

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My one friend group can't stop saying, "See you in hell!" in a cheerful voice instead of, "Talk to you later!" and my other friend group can't stop calling things "penis" instead of "cool" or "good", so I just unironically uttered the phrase, "Sounds penis, see you in hell," as I got off the phone.

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They are about to demolish the Nabil darwish museum to build another fucking bridge

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Can you explain this gap in your blog history

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More stories from hell (retail) today I was ringing up this lady and she goes oh I want to do part of this on a gift card and the rest on normal card and I go ok and then she hands me a folded piece of paper. I think oh OK it must be folded around the gift card, right? Wrong. It is a folded sheet of 8×11 printer paper with "$40" written on the inside in ballpoint pen. I go what is this. She says a gift card. I say this is not a gift card. She says yes it is. I say this is a piece of paper with "$40" written on it. She says "well it's a gift card." I say it absolutely is not. I am grinding my teeth. She says well I want to use it. I say you physically cannot do that bc it is a piece of paper. I cannot scan or swipe it. I apologize, as if this is my fault, and not because she is completely insane. I hate it here

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goon 1: hey boss i need help with my homework

mafia guy: i hired youses to KILLS people not do Algebra

goon 1: no this is pre-alebgra

mafia guy: ohs thanks gods, i was actuallys coverings for a lacks of knowledges in the area via an outburst of aggression, im sorry it had to come to this

goon 1: yeah its actually history homework. mesopotamia. way older than algebra.

mafia guy: ill teach you to be euphrates of these gah damn hands GOON!

goon 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7: i hop the boss doesn't hear us kissing

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this is so real