starlightseer

[starlightseer]

met a woman today whose original real actual given-at-birth first name is "Vendetta." ma'am are you aware you are a videogame protagonist and/or a character in a skullduggery pleasant novel. real quick sorry to bother you miss but who exactly were your parents expecting you to avenge in their name

[starlightseer]

I remember when people pretended to care about bees for a few years because they were an indicator species and now I’m getting replies to that post like “idc if all bugs die as long as we get rid of mosquitos and flies and cockroaches” YOURE GONNA FUCKING DIE!!!!! WE WILL DIE TOO!!!!! WE WILL ALL DIE WITHOUT BUGS!!!! IM NOT KIDDING!!!!

[starlightseer]

I dont really fuck with american pop culture and its discourses anymore but Beyonce celebrating ethnic cleansing with her tour shirt is tooooo on the nose

[starlightseer]

Now, when members of the democratic party say, what do you expect us to do to oppose Trump..

This is why people say they are complicit.

[starlightseer]

free my girl she did all that shit but the fandom is mischaracterizing her for it

[starlightseer]

[starlightseer]

A man in a woman way and a woman in a man way.

She's the worst best to ever do anything.

Take my hand. Headcanon Petrel as bigender with me.

(he/him and she/her)

[starlightseer]

All my friends hate love me for my terrible taste in characters.

[starlightseer]

Getting a nice lunch and almost immediately becoming overstimulated by food is both my own personal 9/11 and also got me pretty certain I'm autistic.

[starlightseer]

meant to draw this shirt back when i saw it during crawfish season. then i didn't. then i meant to draw it on talk like a pirate day. didn't do that either. miss admin shelly ma'am i am SO sorry

[starlightseer]

my love for shelly is like a ship on the ocean… sailing with a cargo full of love and devoootioooooon

[starlightseer]

Maybe Dad won't notice if a few thousand more hairs get on their clothes...

[starlightseer]

[starlightseer]

When my mother gets into facebook fights with her childhood friends who grew up to be racists, she passive-aggressively fucks with them by making a donation to a local refugee assistance organization in the name of their immigrant grandmothers, a donation large enough that they get a card from the organization saying so.   She passive aggressively fucks with the same demographic of friends who #bluelivesmatter by commenting with details about the various petty crimes they committed together as teens, e.g. “Wow Joey, where was all the respect for blue lives when we hotboxed your uncle’s patrol car?” 

And obviously both these approaches are specific to former juvenile delinquent turned UMC babyboomer but it feel still inspirational in that we can all find our own chaotic good pettiness niche. 

[starlightseer]

[starlightseer]

Sherlock Holmes is the funniest case of “doomed by the narrative” ever. Doomed by the narrative and destined to die young bc the creator hated him, and then the fans literally bullied him into un-dooming the narrative, writing about him for another thirty years, and giving the character a canonical happy ending where he retires to the countryside and keeps bees. Funniest shit ever.

[starlightseer]