starlostjisung

[starlostjisung]

you could call me babe for the weekend

chapter two: welcome to the show

wc: 5.3k

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“what? are you crazy? do you have temperature? let me check”, chan put his hand on your forehead to check

“no, no, listen to me”, you grabbed his shoulders and made him look you in the eye, “this is genius”

“no, y/n, this is ridiculous”

maybe it was because you had been going crazy all day trying to find a solution for the mess you had caused for yourself, but now that you had chan there and you had come up with this, you honestly saw no flaws in your plan. your best friend would be your fake boyfriend. it was perfect.

“chan, you are the perfect man for this, you have to do it with me”, you told him

he sighed looking at you and let his arms fall to his sides, “y/n, we’re best friends”

“exactly! that’s why this is perfect”, you let go of him and walked around your living room trying to convince him, “we know the other almost better than we know ourselves, we have been best friends for years now, it won’t be weird i’m sure, it would just be like we usually are but a higher level”, you looked at him again

“a higher level?”, he sighed again

“yes”

he rubbed his eyes a bit frustrated with your chaos and the fact that you were bringing him along, “y/n, your parents know me”

“and that’s why they will completely fall for it”, you walked up to him and grabbed his hands, “they already found weird that i had been seeing someone for a while and i hadn’t mentioned anything to them. when they realise it’s you, i will just tell them that we had been keeping it quiet because we wanted to make sure that everything between us was fine and we were completely sure of what we were doing to not jeopardise our friendship, that we had kept it only between us until we both felt ready. they won’t question it”

chan had never felt so indecisive in his life. yes, he wanted to help you, he would do anything for you and you knew that. but also, he was scared of the way that this weekend could change your friendship, the way that you two could fall from the tightrope you were just about to walk on and lose yourselves on the fall… you couldn’t see that now, you were too worried about how to survive this weekend.

but he could, and he was not ready for that to possibly happen. not now, not ever.

“chan, please”, you tried again, “i promise i won’t make you watch scary movies again, and i will help you on laundry days”

“no, y/n, don’t blackmail me”, he pushed you away and walked around the table, trying to put some distance between the two of you

“i will bake the cake that you love so much and i will bring it to the cabin and we can eat it together and not leave the room the entire day just… please… chan, i need you”

he looked at you and you were just there. battling your eyelashes at him, looking at him like your life was on his hands. how could he say no to you.

he could never do that.

he let out what probably was the biggest sigh of his life, “fine, i’ll do it”

“thank you thank you thank you i love you so much you’re the best friend in the entire world i promise to make you the biggest cake you’ve ever seen in your entire life”, you crossed the room and jumped into his arms with an abnormal force, but luckily chan was able to catch you on time

“yeah yeah, it’s whatever”, he put you on the floor again, “you owe me, big time”

“yes, i know”, you looked at him with the biggest smile and the brightest eyes he had ever seen.

you hugged chan again, and he hugged you back.

there were few things in your life that you could be completely sure of, but there was one thing that you knew.

chan would always have your back.

“i’m leaving the company now, do you want me to buy anything on the way?”, chan asked you on the phone

“no it’s fine, i cooked today so there’s no need”, you told him through the speaker as you were finishing dinner for the two of you

“you sure?”, you could hear the door of the car closing

“i’m sure, plus i baked you some cake for tonight too, as an extra thank you for your help”

“yes!”

you smiled at his reaction, even though he couldn’t see you. you could just picture him, cheering in the car because you had made him cake. he was going to be the death of you.

“okay, so i’ll be there in 15 minutes tops” he said

“fine, drive safe, see you”

“see you soon, love”, and with that he hung up the phone

you couldn’t help the blush that adorned your cheeks at chan’s pet name for you. this week you had been working on what you had called “the family trap”, which was basically your plan for this weekend.

you had told him what he should expect from this weekend: you two would arrive on friday and that day you would be with your parents, grandparents and also your uncle, aunt and cousin. on saturday, to celebrate your aunt’s birthday, some of her friends and relatives would go there to spend the day. they would arrive in the morning and leave trough out the day, whenever they wanted. and then on sunday, your family and you two would go back to seoul.

easier said than done. “calm down, it will be okay, i’m gonna be there with you”, he told you every time he saw you getting anxious about it or feeling overwhelmed.

tonight, he was coming to finish preparing small details that had been left out. and also to spend some time with you, something you two did whenever you could.

you had just finished setting up the table when the door rang. you went to open it and saw that chan was there, holding a bouquet of flowers.

“chan, what’s that?”

“flowers, can’t you see?”, he asked you while coming in

“no you idiot, i can see them. i meant why do you have them”, you closed the door and followed him to the living room

“well, what kind of boyfriend would i be if i went to my girlfriend’s house and didn’t give her anything”, he told you while giving you the flowers

“you’re an idiot, you know that”, you said while taking the flowers from him

“a thank you would have been nice”, he replied sarcastically

you laughed at him, “thank you, chris, they’re very beautiful”

“you’re welcome, i know they’re your favourite “

you nodded while looking at him. for a moment none of you said anything, you just stayed there, looking at each other in the middle of your living room.

you cleared your throat and looked away from him, “right, i’m gonna go and find a vase for the flowers, you can sit down”, you left the room as quickly as you could while trying to seem normal. suddenly the room was very hot and you were almost sure you didn’t have the heater on.

once you put the flowers on a vase, you went back and sat on a chair in front of chan. you started eating while you talked about your day.

he talked about how the recording had gone that day and how han’s voice had broken while he was recording and how they almost pissed themselves while laughing - and you while he told you the story - and you told him how you had been working on different meetings that your boss had planned for the next week.

for an outsider, this scene would perfectly be of a normal couple, eating together while they told each other what they had been doing while they missed each other. that was what you wanted to portray this weekend.

“okay so, we’re leaving tomorrow at 3 right?”, he asked you after you both had finished dinner - and the cake of course.

“yes, it’s an hour drive, so there’s no need to leave earlier than that”

“okay, we’ll go in my car, so i’ll come to pick you up”

“you sure? i can go to your dorm and we can leave from there”, you asked him

“no, what kind of boyfriend would i be if i made my girlfriend move from one place to another? don’t worry, i’ll pick you up”, you felt your heart stutter a bit

“okay”, you looked down trying to calm the blush that had covered your cheeks once again

“y/n, there’s one thing we haven’t talked about”, chan told you a bit serious this time

you looked at him quite surprised, “what?”, you thought you had gone over everything: the plans for everyday, the people that would be there, the kind of questions that your aunt and cousin would ask him, the-

“our limits”, he said

you blinked at him, “our limits?”

“yeah, i mean… we both are kind of touchy and physical people, we are often hugging or close to each other, but if we need to appear to be in a relationship, maybe that’s not enough”, he said while looking at anywhere but you

“right…”

“i-i mean, i’m not saying that we have to make out or any of that, please don’t get me wrong”, he put his hands up trying to defend himself, so you didn’t think bad of him or anything

“no no, don’t worry, i understand what you meant”

“okay…”, he let out a sigh

“i mean, we’re pretty touchy with each other, you’re right, so i guess we could… you know, stay the same, but maybe a bit more? if that makes sense”, you asked him

“yeah, i think that would work, us but a bit more”

“yeah, us a bit more”

“just no kissing on the lips”

“no no, no kissing on the lips”, why would he even say that?

you both were a bit embarrassed at that moment and for the first time in your many years of friendship, the two of you sat in silence, not knowing what to say. it wasn’t an uncomfortable silence it was just… silence charged with something unknown. something that had a lot of weight. but you didn’t know what it was, at least not yet.

“right so, i’m gonna go and finish packing for tomorrow”, he told you while standing up to leave

“oh right, yeah, i have to pack too, so i better get to that now, yeah”, you stood up as well

there was something weird going on between the two of you. you could just tell, but you hoped that it would go away for the weekend, nothing could go wrong in this trip.

“i will call you tomorrow before i leave to make sure you’re ready, okay?”, he asked you while he opened the door

“okay, and chris… thanks again, this means a lot to me”, you told him being completely honest

“don’t even mention it, that’s what friends are for, right?”, you swear you saw something in his eyes when he said that, but it was gone as soon as it had appeared

“yeah, you’re right”, you let out a forced smile, he could see right through it but decided to not say anything

“bye love, see you tomorrow”

and with that, he was gone

you turned around in your bed for the thousandth time that night. it didn’t matter what you did, you couldn’t sleep tonight. your mind wasn’t letting you. your thoughts were running and running and running.

you were nervous about the trip. but not about your aunt, no. about bang chan. chan and you. and your friendship.

you and him were best friends. the very best of friends. but you couldn’t deny that at the beginning of your friendship, you had had a small crush on him. okay maybe it wasn’t that small. or a crush either.

you had been in love with him. probably a small part of you still was. but you knew you two together would never happen because he was your best friend. your were completely sure he only saw you as his best friend. so, as cliche as it sounded, you decided you wouldn’t say anything in order to save your friendship. if the options were having him as your best friend or not having him at all, you would always choose the first one.

you had had relationships after meeting him and while some of them didn’t work because, well… different reasons, some of them didn’t work because you couldn’t help but compare your then boyfriends to chan. what chan would have done if you were with him. you knew you couldn’t do that, but your hearts doesn’t always listen to your head.

so now, after an entire week of planning what you both wanted to be a real - not perfect- couple, your heart couldn’t help but mess up with you. you were creating the plot of the type of life you could have had. but you hadn’t had. and you had to fake it now.

your turned around again, this time placing the pillow above your head. it may have been you the person who just one week ago was sure that this would work out perfectly and that you could definitely do it and blah blah blah. you had been pretending for a week, with just you two. the big nights hadn’t even happened yet. and your heart was already a mess.

you screamed into the pillow. you punched the bed.

why did you have to make this mess in the first place?

why did you bring chan into all of this?

was it really too late to say that you couldn’t go?

“blue hair?”

“mmm, could be, but i’m not sure”

“red hair?”, you tried again

“no, that’s a big no”

“oh listen please, blonde!”, you said excitedly

“really? would you like that one?”

“oh my god, are you kidding? yes please, you looked great with blonde hair”

he laughed at your reaction, “okay i guess i’ll think about it”

you and chan had almost arrived at the cabin and he was telling you that he had been thinking about a new hairstyle for the next comeback and he wanted to know your opinions so you took your opportunity to defend blonde bang chan as the number 1 bang chan

you sighed while looking out the window, feeling the nerves starting again. chan looked at you and saw how anxious you were getting, “hey”, he tried to catch your attention, “look at me”, you did

“everything is going to be fine, alright? i’m going to be with you all the time, and no one’s going to suspect anything okay? we got this”, he held your hand and squeezed it to reassure you that he was there with you. he would always be.

“okay”, you smiled at him

you arrived at the cabin and saw your uncle’s car and also your grandparents’ car. chan parked his car next to theirs and before you got out from the car, he grabbed your hands again, “y/n, we got this okay? your aunt won’t see us coming, we’re gonna make her regret everything bad she has ever said about you okay? i’m with you”

for the first time that day, you felt like you could finally breathe, so after breathing out you replied, “okay, we got this”

“that’s my girl”, he smiled at you and you smiled back at him

when you got out from the car and went to get your suitcases, you saw your parents’ car parking next to chan’s. you looked at chan and saw that he was already looking at you, “you ready?”, you asked him

he nodded, “let’s do this”

your parents left their car and went to hug you, “hi honey, how have you been?” your dad asked you

“i’ve been good, busy with work but good”, you replied while hugging him and your mom after. when you finished, you turned to look at chan, “mom, dad, you remember bang chan right?”, you asked your parents

your mom was a bit surprised to say the least. she had been expecting you to introduce some new boy you had met, not you best friend turned into boyfriend now, “i-i, yeah, of course we remember, how have you been?”

he went up to your parents and meet them properly, “i’ve been very good, thank you, and thanks for having me here this weekend”, as always, chan was the image of perfect son-in-law

“don’t worry, it’s our please son”, it was your dad who talked now

with that, you all took your baggage and went into the cabin. it was time to start the main show

once inside, you hugged and said hello to all of your family and then, introduced chan

“right, so everybody, this is chan…chan, this is everybody”, he bowed politely to your family and you could see that your grandparents took an instant liking to him. your uncle shook his hand too, good sign as well.

but then, the moment you had all been waiting for: your aunt and cousin.

“i feel like i’ve seen you before”, that was the first thing your aunt told him

your cousin, whose mouth had been open wide since she first saw chan entering the house, said “mom, he is bang chan from stray kids!”

“oh, so you’re famous?” that got your aunt’s attention. you didn’t know if that was a good thing or not

“yeah, well… kind of”, you could tell that chan was starting to feel a bit embarrassed, he didn’t like getting this type of attention, especially from people that he knew were not very good towards you.

you took it as your sign to go to your room to unpack and give you two a moment. you went upstairs and closed the door behind you.

“right, sorry about that, but this is the kind of energy we’re going to have this whole weekend so i-“, you stopped talking when you looked at your room. how could you forget about this. your room, the one that you had always used on your own and were using for the first time with your - fake - boyfriend had only one bed. you hadn’t thought about that. you closed your eyes and breathed in. counted till three and breathed out.

“chris, there’s only one bed”, you told him with your back towards him

“mmm, okay, don’t worry about that, i… i can sleep on the floor, there’s no problem”

you turned around so quickly you felt dizzy, “no, you don’t have to do that, i’ll take the floor, you are in this mess because of me, it’s the least i can do”

“no, y/n, i can’t let you do that, i’m fine on the floor don’t worry”

“no, chris, you’re not sleeping on the floor”

“then what?”, he asked you, even though you both knew the answer

you were the first one to break the silence, “we can share the bed, it’s big enough for both of us. besides, we’re supposed to be a couple, so i guess we should sleep together”

“yeah, i guess”, you looked at each other, the same kind of silence that filled your living room yesterday happening again, and it was chan who broke it first for the second time

“let’s unpack everything now, shall we?”, and with that he went towards your suitcases to get everything ready in your room.

you breathed in and out again, you felt like you were going to do that a lot this weekend

the weather had been extremely good all day, so you took it as your opportunity to have dinner on the terrace of the cabin. the conversation had been good for most part: your parents already liked chan from before, and your grandparents and your uncle seemed to like him as well. you couldn’t blame them, chan was easily the best person you had ever met, everyone who knew him liked him. he was just that kind of person.

everything had been going well but of course, it wasn’t going to be like that all night. your aunt and cousin had been analysing him the entire night, whispering between each other and questioning how someone like bang chan - handsome, funny, the image of the perfect guy - could be with someone like, well… you. you were just a normal girl, with a normal job, nothing extravagant about you, who liked everything simple and were happy with small things. how could someone that amazing be with just a random girl?

“so bang chan, you seem to be able to do anything right? i mean, you sing, you write, you dance, you’re kind of perfect”, your aunt told chan when you finished dinner. it seemed that someone had done some research while you had been unpacking.

“well, i wouldn’t say perfect, but we all work hard for the group to achieve new things”, chan replied politely, always including his boys

“no, but you have a successful group under you, who follow your orders, you must be so powerful”, your aunt continued

“they don’t follow my orders, i might be the leader, but we do everything together, we’re a team”, you could see that the question had rubbed chan the wrong way, and while people who didn’t know him wouldn’t notice any changes, you did. you always did

“anyway, having that much power must feel amazing, not forgetting how much you must be paid i’m sure”, you knew your aunt wasn’t shy when she wanted to know something and she wasn’t one to beat around the bush, but even this surprised you. you honestly didn’t even know what to say

chan just smiled at her and reached for his glass to drink, honestly he only did this to have his mouth occupied and not say anything. after all, even if this conversation was only just between you two and your aunt and cousin, your whole family was there and he didn’t want to make a scene.

“bang chan i heard your new comeback is happening soon, are you excited?”, your cousin asked him. this couldn’t be good

“yes, we’ve been working very hard so i’m excited to finally share it with the world”, he answered

“awesome! and are you done with preparing the choreos for promo and all that stuff?”, she continued. where was she going with this?

“kind of, we’re in the middle of all that, just practising choreos and concepts and getting everything ready”

“oh i’ve always loved dancing, i did it when i was a kid. you know, i was very good with movements and also very flexible. i’d love if one day i could go and watch you perform”, she told him while ogling her eyes at him

you rolled your eyes so hard you swear they almost fell from your head. honestly you knew this was gonna be chaos, but not this kind of chaos

chan let out a nervous laugh, not knowing what to reply, “well, i’ll see what i can do”

“or maybe i could go and watch you rehearse. i’m also very into fashion, so maybe i could suggest something that could go with you know… your concepts”, you were about to throw your glass of water on her face. you were going to do it. you were this close to doing it when you felt chan’s hand grabbing your thigh, calming you down.

he knew you better than you knew yourself, so when you pictured yourself throwing water towards your cousin, he had already pictured himself stopping you from doing that.

chan’s hand on your thigh hadn’t gone unnoticed by your aunt, of course not.

“so tell me, how did this thing between you happen?” she asked you

you looked at chan, getting ready to answer your aunt, but found him already looking at you and beating you to it, “well we had known each other for a long time but had never given us a go, you know, it was this kind of “right person, wrong time” thing, until we decided we couldn’t do it anymore, so we just went for it and well, here we are”

your aunt was not happy with his answer

“yeah but, don’t get me wrong, you have such a wonderful life and meet a lot of people, famous people at that, why aren’t you with someone of the same category?”, there it was, the offensive question, nothing that you hadn’t heard before, you were used to it.

but chan wasn’t, and he wasn’t having any of it, he had had enough, “well to be fair, i’ve always been in love with y/n, ever since we first met and the reason why i never said anything was because i thought she deserved better, not someone that would be working everyday and would spend months away. but i couldn’t take it anymore, so i decided to be selfish and confess. and now, i thank my lucky stars every day that she felt the same way, because i’ve never been happier and i just hope i make her as happy as she makes me”

you were speechless and could do nothing else but look at him. you and chan had anticipated that this type of questions could come out and that you would have to deal with them, but you never thought that chan would answer like this. like he was telling the truth. like these were his real feelings. his deepest secret.

you almost believed him completely. almost. you wanted to. but then you remembered that he was supposed to be your boyfriend. and boyfriends said this type of things all the time. “don’t get your hopes up”, you told yourself

“so, to answer your question, i don’t want to be with anyone of my category as you put it, i want to be with y/n, and that’s it”, chan finished and looked at you.

you were in so much trouble.

it was after midnight, everyone had already gone to their rooms. you were sitting in your bed, ready to go to sleep. chan was in the bathroom, getting ready to join you.

you were looking at your phone but got lost in your thoughts. you couldn’t stop thinking about chan’s words before. right person, wrong time he had said. you knew it was all an act but a part of you hoped that it wasn’t. and that hurt a little bit.

you weren’t blaming chan, you would never do that. but this was what you had been dreading the last couple of days. feeding the delusional part of you that believed that chan could have ever felt the same way you felt towards him. that at one time, there possibility of you together had existed, but none of you had been brave enough to take it.

“y/n? you there?”, you heard chan asking you after leaving the bathroom

“yeah, sorry, got lost in my head a bit”

“i could see that”, he laughed at you, “mmm, i usually sleep without a t-shirt on but if you don’t feel comfortable i can put one on”

you had been so lost in your head you hadn’t even realised he only had some shorts on. oh lord.

“no no, it’s okay, i don’t mind”, you told him

“okay”, with that he got into bed with you

“so, first day down, only two to go. thoughts? prayers? do you need me to call the boys so they come and rescue you?”, you asked him while laughing, trying to take some pressure off

he laughed at you and got comfortable next to you, “no no, i’m fine, you don’t need to call the boys. but it was intense, i’ll give you that”

“yeah it was”, you agreed with him

“i still can’t believe you aunt just asked about money like that, like she was asking about, i don’t know, food or clothes”, he told you while laughing uncontrollably

“well my favourite moment was when my cousin flirted with you, i wonder what her boyfriend would think of that”

“y/n, she was not flirting”

“chris, are you fucking kidding me? she sure was”

“well maybe a bit but not full on i think…”, he knew she had been flirting with him but he was trying to make you feel better

“chris, she was this close to jumping your bones right in front of all of us”

“y/n!”, chris snorted at that

“it’s true and you know it!”, you hit him on his chest, making him laugh even harder, “you should have known, you’re the king of flirting”

“i am not”

“yes, you are”

“no, i am not”

“chris, for fuck’s sake”, you went to hit him again, but he grabbed your hand in his

“okay, i’ll admit it, if you say please”, he used one hand to push himself upwards to have a better look at you under him

“chris, fuck off”

“oh i will fuck off, if you say please”, he pushed

“chris”, you were laughing uncontrollably at this point, with tears from laughter falling down your face

“okay okay, we’ll leave it like this for now”, he laid again with his head on the pillow, right next to yours

you turned on your side and looked at him, laughing at him and his antics. he looked at you, feeling relaxed and content, until he saw something and grabbed your head

“oh no, i think you’ve lost it”, he placed his hands on your cheeks while looking at your ear

“what? what did i lose?”, you touched your ear thinking he may be talking about your earring- which was the place he was looking at - but you felt it there, there was nothing missing

“i think you’ve lost your last name, do you wanna take mine?”, he asked you with the biggest smile on his face

“chris for fuck’s sake stop it!”, you hit his chest once again and pushed him, while he just laughed at you

you couldn’t believe this idiot. you looked at him and laughed, just from watching him. because at that moment, you were happy. with him. just you two like no one else existed at that moment.

he looked at you, with a soft smile on his face, and he used his hand to place a lock of your hair behind your ear.

you felt your cheeks blushing again but hoped he wouldn’t see it.

“y/n, i knew these trips were always difficult for you, but i had no idea they could be like this, i’m proud of you for enduring them for so long”, he told you honestly

at that moment, you felt seen. like you always felt with chan. like your feelings mattered. like you were someone important

“thank you”, you didn’t say anything else, you couldn’t

he could see it, so he didn’t push it.

“let’s sleep, it’s been a long day and we have a birthday party tomorrow, and i heard someone brought a delicious cake that i can’t wait to taste”

you laughed at him and got ready to sleep

“i heard the cake was your favourite”, you told him while you closed your eyes

you were almost completely asleep - you hadn’t realised how tired you were - when you heard him whispering

“my favourite is the person who baked the cake”

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chapter two is here my loves! thank you so much for all the love in the first part, i hope you like this one too 🩷

stay tuned for the following chapters :)

my other fics

taglist (ask in comments to be added)

you could call me babe for the weekend taglist: @beyunjinnn @emmiesoverthemoon @skzbiasot8 @havennz @hyunjinxxs @reetheratt @heartwithoutaname @ahseyy @hyvneluv @domicaru @annyeongffs @necrozica @lavunyan @0x1lovesong1 @leylaasroom @bluesungology @sleepyzeiff @velvetmoonlght @encoredesires @sammhisphere @we-are-bloody-inspired @straykids4lifeee @xxestxays @4ng3l-ch1ld @geni-627 @how-are-you-not-fine @luvbangchan

[starlostjisung]

hey babes!! i’m releasing a rockstar jisung au soon- want to be tagged? (ik you love hannie lol) mwah!!

YES PLEASE!! i’d love to, thank you 🩷🩷

[starlostjisung]

hi! can i request stray kids 9th member au, where the reader has been feeling down and the boys plot to make her feel better?

hiiii!!!

i loved this idea, thanks for sending it and i hope you like this 🩷

- learning to breathe again

PAIRING: skz x 9th!member (platonic)

GENRE: angst, comfort

WC: 2.1k

CW: reader is overworked

SUMMARY: with a new comeback just around the corner, you felt everything: the pressure, the chaos, the anxiety. you pushed yourself through it but you needed the guys to help you breathe again

you had known from the start that being in a co-ed group would be difficult, especially when that group would consist of 8 boys and just 1 girl. this had never happened before.

however, you had known the boys for a long time, after being a trainee for almost as long as chan. that’s why when chan told you that he was choosing the members for a group and he wanted you in it, you agreed. immediately. there was no doubt in your mind that you could do this with the boys, and that you wanted to do it.

fast forward to almost a decade later, you had it all. or at least a lot of things you had dreamed about when you started. you had debuted, released a lot of albums, won awards and went on tours many times. you still had a lot of things that you wanted to achieve as a group, but there was also a lot of pride in all of the things you had achieved already.

it was thanks to the love and support of fans, family and friends. you knew that of course. but it was also thanks to the hard work that all 9 of you put. because you worked. a lot.

you loved your job, you would never change it for anything nor would you take it for granted. but there were times when it could be suffocating. when instead of motivating you to go on, it would only push you to the ground and make you think this wasn’t meant for you. that you didn’t fit in this world. especially when you felt like the world was demanding more of you just because you were a girl in a group full of boys.

the good thing about being in a group is that whenever one of you was feeling down, when that person felt the weight of the world on their shoulders, there would be 8 other people taking that pressure from their shoulders and grabbing their hands to walk the same path together, not leaving anyone behind.

and that was the case for you at the moment.

you were working on your next comeback, which was coming very soon. this is always an exciting time but it’s also really stressful and tiring.

comebacks meant recording sessions, dance practices, shooting music videos, photo sessions for the album, interviews, promo, travels… and right now, you were not feeling it.

you had been in the studio all evening recording with bang chan and changbin. the three of you were recording some parts that were missing in a couple of songs. you were all exhausted but you had to do it.

“okay, y/n, you ready?” chan asked you as you went inside the booth to record

“yeah, ready”

he played the track and you got ready to sing your lines. the first time you did it you came in late, so you started all over again. the second time, you were early. the third time, was good but you felt you could do better.

this went on for some time until you finally hit it right, “okay, this is perfect, we got it”, chan said

however, you were not completely sure, “you sure chan? i think i could do better with another try”

“i-i mean, it was perfect y/n, but if you’re not happy and want to do it again, it’s fine, there’s no problem”, changbin said

you looked at them and saw how exhausted they were, not because of you, but because of all of the work you had been doing these last few weeks or months, you didn’t even know at this point

“well if you’re both happy with this take we’ll leave this one, yeah, let’s go with this one”, you told them and left the recording booth

“right, so we have to mix the harmonies of this part and then add the chorus, and this one would be done” you heard changbin and chan talking with the producer so you took that as your cue to leave

“guys, if you don’t need me anymore, i’m going to go home, if that’s okay”

the boys shared a look because this wasn’t normal, you would always stay with them and watch them work on the songs once you were finished recording your parts. it was like a tradition you had with 3racha

“mmm, yeah, if that’s what you wanna do you can go home y/n” chan said

with that, you said your goodbyes and left the studio, leaving the boys a bit worried about you

“okay let’s go from the top, ready? 5, 6, 5, 6, 7, 8” the choreographer said

the music started and you all got into positions. you were practicing the choreo for the title track of the comeback. you were going to shoot the video for it next week, so now you were all immersed in learning the choreo and different movements and positions you would have to do throughout the video.

your choreos are always demanding and need a lot of energy, but you had never had any problems remembering or learning them.

of course you would slip here and there, but that was expected, you were human. but your brain was not cooperating with you today. at all.

you saw the moves, you tried to learn them and do them, and you did. but you felt like you weren’t doing them right. that you were late with the music. that you moved the wrong way. that you went to positions that weren’t yours.

the boys could see that. they could see that even though you were giving your all today - just like any other day- something was wrong with you, and had been for a while, ever since chan and changbin first realised it that day in the studio.

the song finished and you felt like you were going to collapse, “okay, let’s rest for a bit, we’ll be back in 5”, the choreographer said

as soon as he left the practice room, a bottle of water was firmly placed in your hand

“drink it, you look like you’re going to faint”, it was lee know, always looking out for you

“i feel like i’m going to”

“are you okay? you look a bit out of it today”

“i don’t know, i feel like even though i’m trying, i just don’t get there. i’m late with the movements, i mix the places where i have to be, i’m confused with everything”

“y/n, it’s normal, we’re still learning the choreo, this is new”

“but this has never happened before minho”, you were getting really frustrated now

“not every choreo is the same, nor do we learn everything easily y/n, you should know this by now”

“i know but it’s just-“

“just nothing, y/n, don’t beat yourself up for this. we still have time before we shoot the video. take it easy, don’t push yourself too much”, and with that he left to get ready to start practice again

“okay, everybody ready? let’s start the track”, as soon as the choreographer was back, you all got into position and started again. you tried to remember what lee know had told you, but you just couldn’t do it. you had never had this type of problems, you had always been perfect, so why weren’t you perfect now?

this went on for a couple of weeks and all of the boys noticed this. they noticed the mistakes during dance practices, the many takes you wanted to do each time you recorded, the early morning and late nights you would spend at the company practicing alone, whether it was the choreos or the lines you would have to record that day.

they knew they had to do something before you broke down completely.

that’s why they decided to spend the day off with you, trying to cheer you up and make you forget everything that was pushing you down. hopefully their plan would work out.

they decided you would all have a lazy and quiet day at home, you were all exhausted and that’s what you all needed. they knew you weren’t going to wake up early - you were definitely not an early bird - so all of the guys went to the dorm you were sharing with seungmin and felix and started to get everything ready.

they were going to cook some cupcakes because they knew they were your favourite - well chan and lee know were going to cook, seungmin and felix weren’t allowed anywhere close the kitchen even though it was their dorm.

the rest of the boys were in charge of the living room. they had to prepare the sofas, blankets, snacks, tv ready with your favourite show. everything you would need for a day when you didn’t have to leave the couch, unless it was to go to the bathroom.

surprisingly, they were able to prepare everything on time, cupcakes included, so when you finally woke up and went to the living room you were surprised to say the least.

“wh-what’s all this?”, you looked around, surprised to see not only felix and seungmin, but all of the guys there, and your living room turned into a… well you didn’t know what it was but there were blankets and pillows everywhere. and snacks. and cupcakes.

“we’re having a day off all together!”, han told you

“yeah, just like we did just after we debuted”, hyunjin continued

it’s true, whenever you had a day off after you debuted - a rare occurrence to be honest - you would just lay around in your shared dorm and do absolutely nothing. just being together and talking and joking was enough. you were happy with that and you missed it.

“but why? why did you do all this?”, you asked them while pointing at the food, the living room, everything

felix grabbed your hand and guided you to sit down next to him, “y/n, we know you have been feeling down for a bit, you know you can always come to any of us and we will always help you, we are a family, and we will always be there for each other”

you looked him in the eyes and felt yours watering, “i know it’s just… i don’t know what’s wrong with me, i’m usually not like this. comebacks are always stressful for all of us but i never have any problems with them but this time around… i don’t know, i feel like i can’t do it and i just didn’t want to put more in your plates, so i thought that i would just push through it and it would go away but i can’t do it anymore”

and that’s when you broke. you let it all out. the stress. the fear. the exhaustion. you knew you were in a safe place to fall, the boys were there to pick you up. but you just needed to let it all out. you needed to breathe.

“hey, y/n, look at me, it’s okay, we got you, we’re here”, it was chan’s now, who was sat on your other side. he pulled you to him and hugged you, “it’s completely normal to go through difficult times, but please, let us know when this is happening. you’re always there for us, and we want to be there for you the same way, okay?”

you nodded against his chest

“pinky promise?”, you saw changbin placing his pinky right in front of your face

you laughed at his antics, “pinky promise”, you told him while lacing your fingers together

“you’re one of the strongest people i know, you’re gonna get through this, i’m sure of it”, it was han this time

you saw all the boys agreeing with him, and felt chan hugging you a bit tighter

“okay, it’s time for breakfast now, come on everybody let’s eat those cupcakes and don’t worry y/n, seungmin and felix didn’t cook any of this so there’s no risk of suffering indigestion or something like that” i.n told you and you saw seungmin getting up to hit him, “ouch”, he said while rubbing his arm

“you deserved it”, seungmin told him

you laughed at the two maknaes of the group and felt truly happy for the first time in a long time.

you looked around the room and saw all of the boys eating, joking and playing with each other, and that’s when you knew everything was going to be fine.

you could finally breathe again

[starlostjisung]

you could call me babe for the weekend

chapter one: bad idea right?

wc: 3.1k

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“and he has his own car because he’s very important for the firm, so of course he has his own office and secretary. the firm would be nothing without him”

that’s what you heard your cousin saying or something like that. to be brutally honest, you weren’t paying attention to what she was saying. you tend to think about other things whenever she talks, just like right now you were thinking about what you were going to have for dinner that night. you had gone grocery shopping the day before, so you had a lot of options: you could prepare something quick like-

“unfortunately he’s very busy with his job right now, he has a lot of cases to work on and a lot of people to defend, so he won’t be able to come to my birthday party next week, so it looks like y/n won’t be the only person alone during the weekend” your sweetheart of an aunt, who you loved so so much, decided to intervene in the conversation about how your cousin’s new boyfriend is oh so wonderful, and he has such an important job, and how he’s mr. perfect, and they are the dream couple and oh oh oh.

you were so done with all of that. you couldn’t understand how your uncle, your dad’s brother, had married someone like that and even worse, how their daughter had come out like that.

“yeah but mom it’s not the same, my boyfriend won’t go to your birthday party because he will be busy working. however, y/n’s boyfriend won’t be there because he’s well… nonexistent” your cousin said making her and her mom burst out laughing.

you dad and uncle were engrossed in another conversation on the other side of the table so they didn’t hear what your cousin said, and your poor mom didn’t know what to do with herself. obviously she had caught the irony with which your cousin and aunt were talking, but she also didn’t want to make a scene, so she just let out an uncomfortable laugh and looked around the room trying to calm herself down.

you? that was a whole other story.

you had put up with this so many times, that this scene that was taking place in front of you was nothing out of the ordinary. every year, for your aunt’s birthday, you would go to her family’s old cabin by the lake and it was always the same thing: the family would arrive on friday for a little family get together, your aunt’s friends would go there on saturday morning and leave throughout the day, and then your family would go back to their own places on sunday. you didn’t see the point of you spending three days there. well, you didn’t see the point of going there at all.

as if it was a tradition at this point, every year your cousin would go to the family getaway with her boyfriend. mind you, you saw a new boyfriend every year. you are not one to judge, but you didn’t see the same boyfriend two years in a row. each boyfriend was even better than the last, and your aunt and cousin wouldn’t stop parading them like they were zoo animals. you felt bad for them to be honest. well, some of them.

you on the contrary would always go alone, because either you had just come out of a relationship or because you weren’t in any type of relationship at all. you didn’t mind this, in fact you were glad you didn’t have to make someone go through what all of this family getaway involves, but it seems like your aunt and your cousin always had to make a comment about that - it didn’t matter if the comments were directed at your, according to them, inability to maintain a relationship, or if you weren’t “girlfriend material”, or that you needed to work harder to find someone good and wealthy but you couldn’t meet those standards so they understood that you were alone - whatever hurtful comment they could think about, they would say it and laugh about it.

you had tuned them out many years ago, you really had. but something about the way. they were laughing today made you snap. you don’t know if it was the comment, the way they laughed, or if you had gotten out of bed the wrong side that morning. whatever made you say this, you don’t know if you should be thankful or shut yourself up forever:

“actually, i was going to tell you today that i’m not going alone this year, my boyfriend will come with me”

everything went quiet.

your dad and your uncle stopped talking.

your mom looked at you like you had grown seven heads all of a sudden.

but the look on your aunt and cousin’s faces? priceless.

you patted yourself on the back mentally.

“a boyfriend? you?” your cousin said rather sceptical

“yes, a boyfriend” you smiled at her with the biggest smile you could muster, however you were now realising what had you just done

“honey, we didn’t know you had a boyfriend, i-i mean you hadn’t told us anything” it was your mom’s turn now, poor thing she was as lost as you were right now

“well, it’s still early days, we’ve been together for three months and i thought i could use this trip as an opportunity to introduce him to all of the family!” your mouth was talking before you could even realise what you were actually saying

“oh, so we’re finally going to meet the man who stayed long enough to come to my birthday party” you couldn’t decipher the look on your aunt’s face, but it was a mix of disbelief and arrogance

“yes, i can’t wait for you to finally meet him” and for you to meet him yourself you thought

what the hell were you doing?

after you said goodbye to your parents and the rest of your family and left the restaurant, you finally realised what had happened, “what have you done y/n?”. on the outside you were the spitting image of someone who had everything together, on the inside… that was a another story.

let’s rewind for a bit. you had said that you:

1. had a boyfriend

2. had been in a relationship for three months now

3. were going to introduce said boyfriend to your family next week

the reality was that:

1. you didn’t have a boyfriend

2. your last relationship ended more than a year ago

3. you were going to the family trip alone

great. just fucking great.

you were spiralling. you needed to vent out. so you decided to go to your best friend’s house: bang chan. you could already imagine his reaction. first, he would laugh at the mess you had created. then, when he saw how you were going crazy with all of this, he would try to calm you down. and lastly, he would try to think of a solution with you. the longer you thought about it, the more shocked that you were at what you had done to yourself. this was all on you. stupid mouth. stupid birthday. stupid cabin. stupid everything.

you arrived to chan and i.n’s dorm and knocked the door. while you waited for him to open the door, you tried to prepare the speech you would need to say now, otherwise you would chicken out, “so, chris, you know how today i went out with my family right? and how my cousin and aunt are always talking about how she’s always in an amazing relationship and i’m the one who-

“hi y/n, come in” it was i.n who opened the door and gave you a quick hug, “haven’t seen you in a while, how are you?”, he asked you while he let you in

“i’ve been good, busy with work, but good. and you? how is the recording coming along?”

“well, same thing you know, singing, singing and more singing. and if i have time, more singing” you laughed with him

once you were in the living room, you saw that felix was there as well, “y/n!! i didn’t know you were coming”, he got up to give you a hug too.

while you got on really well with all of the boys, felix was probably the one you were the closest to. after chan, of course.

“oh no, it wasn’t planned, i was close and i decided to drop by” you smiled at him and looked around trying to find chan

“mmm, is chan here?” it was strange that he hadn’t come out to see you yet

“no, sorry, he’s in the studio with han and changbin, you know, 3racha things” i.n told you

“oh, right, well i probably should have called before i came out of the blue, i’m sorry if i’m interrupting something guys”

“don’t you dare apologise y/n, you’re not interrupting anything” felix told you

“felix is right y/n, come on, sit here with us” i.n said

you sat with them and talked about how the recording was going on. they told you about songs they were excited about and others that didn’t quite work well for this comeback and they were going to leave them for another one in the future.

“so y/n, i don’t want to sound rude or anything, but you came looking for chan and he isn’t here, but is there anything we can help you with?” i.n asked you

honestly you just needed to vent out, “it depends, do you have time?”, and after they nodded their heads, that’s what you did.

you told them everything. how your cousin and aunt behaved every single year. how they treated you whenever you saw them. how these birthday parties in the cabin were always the worst weekend of the year. how you had gotten yourself in the biggest disaster of your life and how you had no clue how to get out from there.

“so now i have to introduce my family to my boyfriend of three months who i don’t even know myself, and that would be it”

the looks on their faces told you everything you already knew. you were crazy. absolutely mental.

felix was the first one to laugh, loudly, uncontrollably, “i’m sorry y/n, i know i shouldn’t laugh, but this is just nuts”

“i know, i know, feel free to laugh at the misery that is my life now” maybe you were being a bit overdramatic, but that’s how you felt after you set yourself up like this

“no but y/n this is just… wow, just wow” it was i.n’s turn to laugh now

you threw your head back and screamed at the ceiling, “what am i gonna do now?”

they just continued laughing at you and you couldn’t help but join them, laughing at the absurdity of it all

“maybe chan will be able to think of something, you know how he always deals with our messes and chaos, so he could help you too” felix told you

“yeah, that’s why i came here, to tell him and see if he could think of something, after he was done with laughing and telling me off and all that”

the boys agreed with you that the best idea would be to talk with chan and see if he was able to come up with something to help you.

it wasn’t the first time that chan helped you deal with a mess you had created, so one more time wouldn’t hurt anybody, right?

once you got home, you showered and got ready to relax for the night. honestly, after the day you had had, you deserved that. in the meanwhile, you had come with possible solutions for your problem, although you weren’t happy with any of them:

1. you could say that you boyfriend couldn’t come to the trip because he had gotten sick last minute, but it was very simple and basic, everyone would think you were lying (which if you were being honest, you were)

2. you could say that you were the one who had gotten sick and your boyfriend was going to take care of you, but again, simple, basic, everyone would see right through you

3. you could use a dating app and try to see if anyone was up for a weekend getaway with the family of the latest situationship in a cabin in-

no, just no no no. that was simply too crazy, even for you.

you knew your ideas were getting out of hand. you needed something drastic. not going to the trip was not an option but going to the trip alone? no, that was an even bigger no.

luckily for you, someone knocked on your door, making you completely forget about dating apps and situationships and red flags and sirens in your head.

your favourite face in the world was right behind the door. you saw his smile getting bigger the moment he saw you and you felt yours doing the same.

“chris, what are you doing here?” you opened the door wider, letting him in

“well, felix texted saying you had been in my dorm looking for me and that you needed my help so, i went to get us something to eat and came here as soon as i finished recording. i’m all yours now” he told you while leaving the food on your dining table and opening his arms extra wide to give you a big hug

never in a million years would you change your and chan’s relationship. you had been best friends for so many years that you don’t even remember you life without him. you were each other’s first person for everything: if one of you had good news, you would tell each other first; if one of you was feeling down, the other was right beside them. that’s how you two worked, so it was no surprise to you that as soon as he had found out that something was going on with you, he had come straight to you. like he always does.

“well, it’s probably the craziest thing i’ve ever done, so you better be ready” you told him while pointing your finger at him

he laughed at you, “well, i’ve bought us food, and i don’t have to record tomorrow so, hit it”

you two sat down and started eating

“so, you know how i was going out with my family today right?”, you asked him and he nodded, “and how my aunt and cousin were also going?”, he nodded again, “and how her birthday is coming up so that means the cabin trip is soon right?”

he stopped eating and looked at you, “oh oh”

“oh oh indeed”

“i don’t like where this is going” he told you

“i can promise you that whatever you’re thinking, it’s worse, definitely worse”

he looked you in the eye, getting serious now, “y/n, what did you do?”

“itoldthemihaveaboyfriendandi’mbringinghimtothecabintirp”, you said it so fast that chan wasn’t able to understand anything

he looked at you, slowly nodded once and told you, “okay let’s try that one more time, but slowly, like human beings normally talk”

you let out a long sigh, “i told them i have a boyfriend and that i’m bringing him to the cabin trip”

everything went quiet. it was so quiet you could hear a hair pin drop. you looked at chan. he looked at you. no one dared to say anything.

you couldn’t take it anymore, “chris, say something please”

“i don’t know what to say honestly”

you placed your hands on your eyes, trying to block everything

“y/n, why did you do that?”

“i don’t know chris, i panicked okay, you know how they get about the boyfriend topic and honestly i’m sick of it and i couldn’t take it anymore so i just said whatever it came to mind”

“which was that you have a boyfriend”

“yes”

“and that you have been together for three months”

“yes”

“and he’s going with you to the trip”

“yes chris thank you for reminding me all the information that i have yet to accept”

he burst out laughing. “i’m sorry y/n, but this… this is just ridiculous”

“i know, i know”, you groaned, “what am i gonna do, chris? i can’t back off now”

“no no, you can’t, otherwise they’re going to find out you’re lying, you know how your aunt and cousin can get”

“yeah i know… i thought about saying that my boyfriend got sick or that i got sick but that would be too obvious. i also thought of finding someone online to go with me and pretend we’re dating but that was a big no no, like i’m crazy but not that crazy”

“yeah no, i’m not letting you do that. you’re not gonna use a total stranger to fake a relationship that doesn’t exist. that’s completely nuts and dangerous. it would be different if you knew him though”

bingo.

you had it.

it had been right in front of you all day long but you didn’t see it, and well, technically right now it was in front of you. you just needed a bit of cooperation.

he hadn’t even realised what he had said, he was just throwing ideas and thoughts. he had no clue of the plan that was already forming in your head. he hadn’t seen how you were looking at him, battling your lashes, like a kid who goes with their parents and wants them to buy him ice cream.

you were a woman on a mission, and your mission was him.

“chris…”, you tried to get his attention

“what?”, he looked at you

you said nothing, just kept looking at him, trying to see if he would catch on your plan.

he did.

“oh no, no no no no” he shook his head while moving his hands, as if that was going to stop you

“bahng christopher chan…”, you slowly got up and walked towards him

“no no no no, y/n don’t you dare” he kept shaking his head and trying to get away from you, when you kneeled in front of him as if you were proposing, which in a way, that was what you were doing

“will you please be my fake boyfriend for the weekend?”

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here’s chapter one my loves!! thank you so much for reading!!

stay tuned for the following chapters :)

my other fics

taglist (ask in comments to be added)

you could call me babe for the weekend taglist: @beyunjinnn @emmiesoverthemoon @skzbiasot8 @havennz @hyunjinxxs @reetheratt @heartwithoutaname @ahseyy @hyvneluv @domicaru @annyeongffs @necrozica @lavunyan @0x1lovesong1 @leylaasroom @bluesungology

[starlostjisung]

I had 3 ideas and you pick which ever one!

Idea 1: where it’s a skz x bsf y/n college au! where she’s been overworking her self but doesn’t notice and when skz try to mention it she just brushes it off and then skz really notice bc when they planned to hang out she didn’t show up multiple times

Idea 2: skz x bsf y/n college au! where she’s been friends with them for a long time and it was a normal Saturday night for her where she was studying in her dorm or apartment (which ever) and skz wanted her to go out with them and but she refused but skz didn’t take no for an answer so they dragged her out to a party and a guy there kept annoying her in a teasing way (like a annoyance to lovers type of way)

hi!!!! i decided to write about idea 1, but i could only see the first two and not idea 3 because it didn’t appear in the message 😔

so if you liked idea 3 and it’s something you would really like to read about, feel free to send it again and i’ll write about it!!

hope you like this one 🩷

- i can make it

PAIRING: skz x bsf college! y/n

GENRE: angst, comfort

WC: 2.3k

CW: unhealthy eating and sleeping habits (reader only studies), reader is overworked, fainting (bl🩸d not mentioned)

SUMMARY: final weeks are upon you and you feel the stress of it and while you seem to be doing fine, the boys can see how overworked you truly are

december means christmas. it means holidays, presents, family, hot chocolate in front of the fire while watching christmas movies or listening to christmas songs. it means snow and playing with friends and little kids throwing snowballs at each other. it means happiness and laughter.

december also means finals. it means projects, presentations, exams, more projects and more exams. it means chaos, anxiety. it means no sleep, no eating, not unless you have finished everything that you need for university, which is not the case.

you’re running with little to no sleep, eating something here and there. you can see that this is not the best option but what can you do. it is what it is, uni life. besides, it will all be over in just three weeks when december finally means christmas and not finals.

just three more weeks, you could make it.

you’re going through a presentation that you have to do the next day when your phone beeps. you stop to look at it and see that it’s a text from your friend seungmin.

“dinner at mine, felix and changbin’s dorm. we’re ordering food but feel free to bring snacks if you want”

you want to go, you really do, but you need to finish this. and then review some more things for the next project and exam. you tell yourself this is temporary and in just three weeks you will be free to go to every single plan the boys make.

“can’t tonight. i’ve got a presentation tomorrow and i have to study for it, but thanks minnie!” you reply

you get up to go to the kitchen to get some water and when you go back to your room, you see he’s already replied.

“you sure?, it’ll just be the boys and you, nothing much. we won’t finish late, you can study for that later”

“sorry minnie, next time i promise i’ll make time and be there, have fun tonight!”

with that you turned your phone off and continued with the presentation. not that you were blaming him, but you couldn’t afford any distractions, you had to focus on the presentation and other uni projects.

you could make it.

it was finally friday and while you still had a lot of uni stuff that you had to work on and study, you were thankful that you didn’t have to go to class for a couple of days at least. and also, that night you were going to the cinema with the boys to relax for a bit.

you had had breakfast before class the previous day with han and i.n and they had convinced you to go with them, saying that they hadn’t seen you in a while and that you needed some time to relax and stop thinking about unit - so after some persuading from their part, you agreed.

you had just arrived to your dorm after class and decided you were going to have a shower, study for a bit for the exam you had on monday and then go to the cinema with the boys.

after showering you laid in your bed to answer some texts from your parents asking you about christmas presents and your exams when you felt extremely tired all of a sudden. you decided that you were going to close your eyes and rest for five minutes. just five minutes, that couldn’t hurt anybody right?

how wrong you were.

when you woke up, you saw that you hadn’t slept for five minutes. it had been three hours. the time that you had planned to study before going to the cinema with the guys. you couldn’t believe you had slept for that long. sure you knew you were tired, but you hadn’t realised you were that tired. you saw the time and realised that if you wanted to get to the cinema on time, you had to get ready and leave in ten minutes max.

however, the exam on monday was quickly approaching and you couldn’t lose more time. you had already lost three hours today.

with a heavy heart you decided to send a message in the group text you had with the boys, “sorry guys, fell asleep and just woke up. i have an exam on monday and i need to study, so i won’t be able to go to the cinema today :( have fun guys, see you other day!”

and with that, you turned your phone off again. you knew they were going to try and contact you, not that you were mad about that, you just couldn’t focus on anything else that wasn’t the exam.

when you got up from the bed and went to your desk to prepare to study, you could feel yourself extremely tired, not knowing how long you could do this. but you needed to push forward. it would be over soon

you could make it, you were almost sure of it.

the exam on monday had gone well. obviously you thought it would have gone better if you had had more time to focus just on that and not on that and the hundreds of other things you had to do but hey that’s uni life for you.

so that’s how you found yourself on the library, studying for the next exam you had in just two days. you basically lived there now. if you weren’t in class, you would be in the library. you would only go to your dorm to shower and sleep at this point. and the boys knew that, that’s why seungming and felix went there to see you, because they knew there was no other way.

“hey y/n”

you raised your head at the familiar voice, “oh hi boys”, you saw felix and seungmin in front of you, pulling out chairs and sitting there.

you made small talk for a bit, just the small talk that you could do in a library full of students with finals. as soon as they took their things out, you took it as your sign to stop the conversation and continue with your exam. the boys shared a look, worried about the state they had seen you at that moment. before they saw you, they had their suspicions that you had been overworking yourself a bit but now that they had seen it, they were more worried about you.

you three studied the whole evening. while the boys took some breaks - to get coffee, something to eat or just relax for 5 minutes - you didn’t stop. not once. you had to push through.

when it was almost closing time, the boys took their things and got ready to leave.

“come on y/n, they’re closing soon, come with us and have dinner. we can relax for a bit, time off is really important” seungmin said

“thanks boys, but i will stay until they close and then i’ll continue studying in my room, don’t worry about me”

“please y/n, leave it for today, we’ve been here all day, you need to stop and get some fresh air, you’re overworking yourself” it was felix this time

“guys i said it’s fine, don’t worry i know what i’m doing” your tone came out a bit more harsh than you had intended but you didn’t have time for this absurd conversation, you needed to study

you turned your head towards your books and didn’t look to the boys again. they shared another look, even more worried now than they had been when they first saw you when they came in. they had to talk with the rest of the boys and put an end to this. they thought you were going to break down soon, but you didn’t agree.

you could make it… right?

friday had come again and another exam had ended. you felt exhausted as you left the class after finishing it. thankfully you didn’t have more classes that day, so you could go to your dorm and prepare for the final exam you had the next week, which thankfully was the last one.

you started feeling weak as you walked through the cafeteria so you decided to get a coffee to drink on your way home. just as you were paying for it you heard someone screaming your name.

“y/n! come here!”

you turned around and saw bang chan and lee know sitting and drinking coffee. once you got yours, you went and sat with them.

“hi boys, how are you?”

“good, we haven’t seen you in a while! you’re basically as stranger now” lee know told you jokingly

he was partly right, you hadn’t seen them in some weeks and you had to admit that you had missed them a lot.

“yeah, you know, just uni stuff”

you three talked about what you had been up to these past few weeks. they told you about all the plans that you had missed out because you called off last minute or directly refused to go because you didn’t have time. you told them about all the studying you had been doing.

you couldn’t deny that a part of you was hurting seeing all the stuff you had missed out, but you knew that this was what you had to do.

though out the whole conversation, you could feel chan’s stare on you. he was checking on you, how you had been doing. because even though you had told them you were tired but you could do it, he could see right through you. he could see how you were beyond exhausted and you were almost on your breaking point.

after finishing your coffee you decided to leave the boys and go to your dorm to study, “right boys, i’m gonna go home and study for the next exam”

“come on y/n, just stay with us for a bit, it’s friday, you have the whole weekend” lee know tried to convince you

“sorry guys, but i really gotta go now” you stood up and felt your knees buckle. you grabbed the table, trying to steady yourself

of course chan noticed this, “y/n, you’re exhausted, you need to rest”

“i’m fine, don’t worry” you could feel something was off with you but you really needed to go home and study, there was no time for other things

“y/n, you are not okay, anyone can see that, you need to rest” chan continued

“chan…” something was wrong

“when was the last time you ate? or slept?” he asked you

“chan please…” something was really wrong

“this is serious, you need to stop this before something happens”

too late. you tried to move but you felt your knees buckle once more and you slumped forward hitting your head with the edge of a table before crumpling to the ground.

everything went black.

bang chan and lee know had taken you to the infirmary room after you had passed out. there the nurse had cleaned your wound on your head and stitched you up. she worked quickly and carefully, asking you questions throughout the process. she told the boys that you had a minor concussion, and that even though it wasn’t something to be extremely worried about, she told them you still needed people with you making sure you were fine and not falling asleep in the following hours.

all that leads to you now, sitting in the living room of bang chan, lee know and han’s dorm. lee know had called the boys and told them what had happened as soon as you left the infirmary. you had insisted on going to your room, promising them you would rest, but they were having none of it. they told you you were coming with them and that the rest of the boys would be there too.

there was no way of getting out of this.

once they all made sure you were okay, the interrogation started

“how long have you been like this?” changbin was the first one to break the silence

“i don’t know, i thought i was fine, that i could make it…”

“you have been overworking yourself, y/n, we told you that when we saw you the other day. but we should’ve done something for you, we should’ve helped you” it was felix this time

you couldn’t let them blame themselves for this, this was your doing, “no, felix, don’t say that. i knew i was tired and i was working a lot, but i thought that was what i needed to do, that i couldn’t do any other thing”

“love, we understand you, we really do, but it’s important that you take care of yourself first”, it was hyunjin’s turn, “you neeed to be on the right mind set to do anything else. you have to put yourself first, you are the priority”

you started to get emotional and the boys saw that, so they pulled you into a hug.

following the nurse’s instructions, the boys made sure that you didn’t sleep for the next hours. you all ordered dinner and laughed and joked while you ate it.

after finishing dinner, bang chan grabbed some games that he and the boys had in their dorm and you spent the night just playing and having fun. you were finally relaxing and you were extremely thankful you had the boys with you, making sure you were alright and that you weren’t going to break down again anytime soon.

you still had a week left, but you had the boys now and you were sure you could make it.

[starlostjisung]

you could call me babe for the weekend

bang chan x reader series

tags: best friends to lovers, fake relationship, mutual pining, slow burn, fluff, angst, eventual smut

synopsis: people say that you are supposed to enjoy family meetings, but unfortunately that wasn’t the case whenever your aunt was involved. with her birthday coming up and the annual trip to her family’s cabin to celebrate it, you tell your family that this time you’re bringing your boyfriend, after having been asked “when are you getting a boyfriend?” every year until now. this surprises everyone, including yourself: you don’t have a boyfriend.

not knowing what to do and knowing that going alone is not an option now, you decide you need a fake boyfriend so you ask your sweetheart of a best friend, bang chan, to help you. after agreeing to be your fake boyfriend, the two of you become the best actors the world has ever seen, making everyone think that you truly are together.

whenever friendships and feelings are involved, what could possibly go wrong?

the chapters

chapter one: bad idea right?

chapter two: welcome to the show

chapter three: hide and seek

chapter four: please don’t become a stranger

chapter five: was it?

chapters will be released periodically, if you want to be added to the taglist let me know!!

i was inspired to write this story after finding aisle be damned by @emmiesoverthemoon go check it out 🩷

[starlostjisung]

- requests are open

📑 fic request guidelines

hi loves! welcome to my writing blog. before sending in a request, please take a moment to read through my guidelines to make sure that your request aligns with what i write 🩷

if you’re a minor, please DO NOT interact with the nsfw works, if i see any minors interacting with them i will block

MY WRITING RULES: i don’t write rape, noncon, underage members or underage reader, ageplaying, hybrids, glorification of mental illness, member x member, poly, sexual slavery, anal sex or drug use. if you don’t agree with my guidelines, you can req from another autor 🩷

note: all fics i write are from assumed fem reader pov

if you are here to chat: hi love! thanks for dropping by <3 ask me anything at all, i love to talk!

✍🏻 additional notes

be respectful ─ please respect my boundaries. if a request doesn’t fit my guidelines, i will not write it

be clear ─ when sending in a request, please provide enough details so i can understand what type of story you want

fandom ─ i only write for SKZ and will not accept requests for other groups or fandoms at the moment

please be patient ─ if you request a fic, i will try to write it as soon as i can. if it’s not updated within a week of you sending in the request, feel free to ask about it

thank you so much for reading! feel free to send in requests that fit these guidelines. i deeply appreciate your support! love you all 🩷

[starlostjisung]

- we’re going to war

PAIRING: changbin x reader

GENRE: fluff; comfort; established relationship

WC: 1.5k

CW: period cramps (bl🩸d not mentioned); period talk

SUMMARY: your cramps wake you up in what seems to be a particularly painful period. luckily for you, your boyfriend is there to take care of you

it all started at 9 AM. your cramps had gotten so bad that they actually woke you up. you knew your period was coming very soon, you just didn’t expect your day to start like this.

you stayed in bed, curling up tighter, hoping the pain would go away or at least it wouldn’t be too bad this month. you were so wrong. a new wave of pain hit you harder this time - you felt your stomach twisting and aching.

you let out a small whimper before you could stop it. you placed your hands on your lower stomach, trying to comfort the area a bit. you let a few breaths out, trying to concentrate on something else that wasn’t the pain you were feeling and how you uterus was trying to destroy you.

another wave of pain made you let out another whimper and you felt movement behind you. changbin, your boyfriend of almost a year, was sleeping soundly behind you. you didn’t want to wake him up, so you slowly - because your stomach wouldn’t let you move like a functional human being - got up from your bed, closed the bedroom door behind you and left for the bathroom to take care of your needs first.

after leaving the bathroom, you walked slowly to the kitchen, needing to take a few breaths in the process and feeling how your body wasn’t cooperating with you. it seemed like your period this time was a bad one.

you needed to take your meds, but you needed to eat breakfast before that. you prepared some coffee and toasts, making sure to leave some for changbin in case he wanted some when he woke up later.

you ate your breakfast slowly, in silence, contemplating different ways in which you could get revenge for yourself for the pain that your body was making you go through. you groaned when you felt another wave of pain, just as you had swallowed your meds. you put your head on the table and that’s how changbin found you mere seconds later.

you were wearing an oversized hoodie, your hair was in a messy bun and you were out of bed extra early - you’re not a morning person at all. he knew instantly what was going on.

“oh no”, he said looking at you from your bedroom door, “is it that time of the month?”

you raised your head and nodded looking at him. you pouted your lips and pressed your hands against your stomach, trying to curl your body into itself.

“oh, baby”, he swept across the room and engulfed you in a big, warm hug. he tucked your head under his chin and placed his hands against your hair and shoulders, “did you eat breakfast?”

“mmm”, you hummed against his chest

“did you take your meds?”

“mmm”

“on a scale from one to ten, how bad is it right now?”

“eleven”

he hugged you extra tighter against him, “oh no, my poor baby, my sweet sugar pie, my angel from heaven, my protein snack”

that one got a smile on your face and you ket out a snort. you pulled away from him to look at his face, “what?”

“what?”

“what did you just call me? protein snack?”

“yes i did”, he looked smug about it

“what does that even mean?”

“i don’t know but it made you smile, didn’t it?”

he had you there. you let out a laugh.

“go lie down”, he told you after he kissed your temple, ”i’ll be with you in a minute”

“where are you going?”, you asked him on your way to the couch

“this is a war, i need my army full of soldiers”

you laughed again but it got cut short when another wave of pain hit you one more time.

just as you made yourself comfortable in your couch with your blanket and an episode of your favourite show on the tv reqdy to start, changbin came back with his army:

- a body pillow for you to place on your back

- your heating pad

- a pack of chocolate cookies

- a bottle of water

- a box of tissues (he knew you were going to watch your comfort show and that you always cried with that, especially when your hormones were playing tricks on you - even though you always cried with it, having your period or not)

he stood in front of you and saluted you like soldiers would do in the army, ”soldier seo changbin at your service, my lady”

“babe, what are you doing?”, you asked him through your laughs

he smiled at you, “my lady, this is an emergency. there’s a war taking place right now and me and my soldiers are here to fight against the enemy in your honour”

“you know the enemy is a part of me, right?”, you couldn’t deny that the absurdity of it all was making your mind forget about the pain you had been feeling - and also the meds were starting to kick in

“… we’ll fight delicately”, his smile was the cutest thing you had ever seen

“alright soldier, come here”

you pushed the blanket off you and made some room for him on the couch with you. he placed the body pillow on your back, the heating pad on your stomach and left the rest of the things he had prepared - sorry, the soldiers - on the table, close enough that he would be able to reach them whenever you wanted any of them.

once he made sure you were completely comfortable and you didn’t need anything else, “i just need you, babe”, he got on the couch with you.

he put your head on his chest and put the blanket on both of you. he run his fingers gently through your hair. he was worried about you, he didn’t like seeing you in pain, especially when he thought he couldn’t do anything to help you. he didn’t want to feel useless, that’s why whenever you had your period, he would go all out trying to help you in any way he could, trying to make your pain go away or at least not let you alone while you were hurting.

you were extremely helpful for him, and you knew how much effort he put every time you had your period and how he just wanted to help you feel better. you couldn’t believe how lucky you were to have him in your life.

“are you feeling a bit better, babe?”, he asked you and pressed a kiss on your forehead, while continuing to run his fingers through your hair

“mmm, a bit, thank you”, you smiled against his chest

“love, you don’t have to thank me, you know that. i just hate that i can’t do more for you”

you pushed yourself against his chest to look at him, “don’t say that, you always do more than enough, and i’m really thankful, you’re perfect”

he smiled at you and then leaned in to kiss you, gently. you both pulled away but rested your foreheads against each other.

“i’m really lucky to have you”, he told you

you shook your head, “no, i’m the lucky one”

“no, i am”

“i am”

“no, i am”

“no changbin, i-“ he silenced you with another kiss. you smiled against his lips and felt him doing the same thing

he pulled away from you, “just so you know, next month your uterus won’t even stand a chance. i’m telling you, i’m going to scare your cramps away and they are going to leave you alone, they’re not going to even dare to come close to you, i promise you”

you half-laughed, half-snorted, and he couldn’t help but look at you with a fond smile on his face and the brightest eyes in the world.

“okay soldier, whatever you say”, you told him while grabbing the remote to start your show

“it’s true, the cramps won’t even know where my soldiers are coming from. you won’t have to worry about anything”

you laughed again and curled yourself more into his chest.

he placed his head on top of your, “just let me know if you need anything else, okay love?”, he told you seriously this time

“mmm”, you nodded against his chest, twisting your head a bit to place a kiss there and hugging him tighter, while he traced his fingertips down your shoulders.

you melt fully into him. he held you like you were the most precious possession he had.

that’s how you spent the whole day. just laying on the couch with each other, enjoying being in each other’s company.

eventually, you both fell asleep on the couch, entangled in each other’s bodies. but yes, before that you had used the tissues he had gotten ready for you because you had cried watching your favourite show for the thousandth time in your life. and no, you could’t blame your hormones for that.

[starlostjisung]

- coming back to you

PAIRING: bang chan x reader

GENRE: smut; fluff; established relationship

WC: 3.8k

CW: smut; unprotected sex; don’t interact if you’re a minor (wrap it before you tap it!!!!)

SUMMARY: bang chan decides to surprise you coming back home earlier and you two show each other how much you have missed the other

the apartment door clicked with a soft beep, followed by bang chan’s steps when he stepped inside your apartment. it was really late, already after midnight, when he let his bags on the floor of your living room. he had been away on tour and you had been apart from each other for months. you didn’t know he was coming home that night, he had told you that they had to do some promo for their next comeback before he could go home to you. of course this was only partly true, they had had recorded some promo, but he also lied to you a bit, he wanted to surprise you.

that’s why when he saw your bedroom door closed and all of the lights off, he had no doubts that you would be sleeping, having no idea that your boyfriend, the one that you had missed terribly, was just outside your bedroom.

bang chan took his coat and boots off and smiled to himself. he was mere seconds away from seeing you again, he was finally home. he padded quietly to your room, wanting to be in your arms once again.

he grabbed the door handle, let a breath out he didn’t even know he was holding, and then, he quietly opened the door.

there you were, sleeping soundly, looking like the softest creature he had ever seen. he swore he could feel his heart beating louder than ever before. he stood there for a minute, just admiring you, with a smile on his face and tears in his eyes. he had missed you so much, but he was finally back.

he walked to your bed and sat in the border of your side, close to your sleeping body. he put his arm around your waist and kissed your forehead, slowly, trying not to scare you.

“love”, he kissed your temple while he moved a lock of your hair that had fallen there, “i’m home”

you stirred in your sleep and started to wake up. you had always been a light sleeper, and also, you would always feel whenever your boyfriend was around, “chris?”

you opened your eyes and saw him. only a small distance between the two of you. you first thought you were sleeping but that was until you saw your boyfriend’s watered eyes and the brightest and most beautiful smile you had ever seen

“surprise”, he told you while laughing and letting a few tears fall from his eyes

“chris!”, you were fully awake now and you couldn’t take it anymore. you threw your arms around his neck, he put his around your waist, “are you really here?”

“i’m here, baby, i’m home” he held you close to him, afraid that you would disappear if he let any distance between the two of you.

“but how? you told me you had some promo to do”, you pulled away from him, just enough to see his face

“i may have lied a bit there, love, i just wanted to give you a surprise” he laughed

“you are a menace”, you playfully hit his chest and before you could do it again, he grabbed your hand and kissed it

“i’ve missed you so much”, he whispered, feeling his eyes watering again and seeing yours doing the same thing

you leaned in, resting your foreheads together and closing your eyes. letting the moment be something soft and quiet. something private, where only the two of you mattered and the world continued sleeping like nothing was happening

“i’ve missed you too, so so much chris”, it was your turn to let some tears fall down your face and chan, upon seeing them, brought his lips to take them away, bringing a smile to your face in its place.

he cupped your face while he kissed your tears, kissing any place that had been touched by them and then, he kissed your lips. he kissed you softly. not heated. not hungry. just a pure and tender kiss that showed you how much he had missed you. how much he loved you. how much he had thought about you during your time apart.

your kiss told him the same thing. how much you had waited for him. how happy you were for him and everything he was achieving. how relieved you were to have him in your arms again.

it was the type of kiss that said how enamoured and besotted you were for each other. this kiss said i love you.

you broke the kiss and tilted your head to look at him, only to find out that he was already looking at you. his gaze was soft, you swore that you could see stars in his eyes. you couldn’t help but smile again.

“what?” you asked him

he shook his head slowly, looking at you with the same smile on his face, “nothing it’s just that… i’ve missed you a lot and i’m really happy to be home”

“i’m happy that you’re home too” you hugged him again, tucking yourself under his chin this time. you felt his heartbeat, following a peaceful rhythm, like the feeling of having yourself wrapped around him was exactly what he needed to be at peace again.

he nestled your face into the crook of his neck, breathing you in like he needed you to survive, tracing his fingers in your hair once more, using them as an anchor to this moment.

there was silence after that. not an uncomfortable one. the type of silence that showed how relaxed you both were once again, in the comfort of your house, in each other’s arms at last.

“it doesn’t matter how much time i’m away from home or how many times i have to travel”, he paused to kiss your forehead delicately and then place his fingers on your chin to make you look at him, “i will always come back to you because you’re my home, you’re my safe place”

you felt your heart growing at his confession, “you’re my home too, christ”

he didn’t answer right away. he slowly stroked your cheek and then he leaned in and kissed you. you kissed while you were wrapped in each other’s arms and your blankets. you kissed while you were surrounded by the quiet of the night and the soft moonlight that came from the window. your focus was on chan and his lips and how he was kissing you like a reminder that you were real and you were not going anywhere. his focus was on you and how much he had dreamt of this moment since the very first day he went on tour.

the kiss was slow. sweet. it lingered, again and again. your lips delicately brushing against each other, your hands tracing each other’s bodies, trying to memorise them again. your lips were sharing quiet whispers in the middle of the night, collecting sighs and moans in the stillness.

chan left your lips to kiss the corner of your mouth, “you’re so beautiful, you really have no idea how much i’ve missed you”, he moved his lips to your jaw and then your neck.

you whispered his name, because your brain was incapable of thinking about other thing that wasn’t chan. his lips. his hands. his arms. everything inside you screamed for every part of him.

you placed your hands in his hair, to bring his mouth back to yours. you deepened the kiss, but it was as soft as at the beginning. it wasn’t about wanting more or speeding things. it was about showing the other how much you had missed them. how happy you were to be back together again.

the kisses went on forever.

you felt chan smile through the kiss and you did the same. you pulled away just enough to look at each others eyes and see the happiness in them. you leaned in again and met in the middle.

at some point, chan’s hands moved slowly, like he was afraid that you would break. his fingers brushed your hips, your waist, your thighs. your fingers went from his hair to his neck, trying to bring him closer to you. you felt his tongue slowly tracing your lips. you opened your mouth more and your tongues met in the middle, relearning the shape of the other again.

chan moved and he slowly guided you back into the pillows, never breaking the kiss. his mouth went to the soft spot under your ear, the one that he knew drove you crazy. one of your hands moved to his back and the other to his shoulder. you used both hands to take his shirt off, which you did with his help. his lips returned to your soft spot, your hands grabbed both of his shoulders now.

“chris…” you moaned against his ear to which he replied with a moan of his own

his mouth left open-mouthed kisses along your neck, while his hands moved under your shirt, tracing along the skin that was there.

“i need you so much” he whispered against your skin, his voice showing how breathless he was at that moment

“i need you too” you replied. he took it as a sign to remove your shirt and once it was off, his lips found yours again, this time a bit hungrier and needier

you didn’t wear a bra to bed, so his hands were quick to find your breasts as well as his fingers to play with your nipples. you moaned against his mouth, a moan that he silenced with his lips deepening against yours. almost like he was savouring you.

your breath hitched as chan started to kiss lower, going from your neck, to your collarbone and finally, your breasts.

his mouth hovered above one of your breasts while he used his hand in the other, “you have no idea how many times i’ve pictured this”, and with that, his lips closed around your nipple, slowly and carefully, like you were a work of art that he was creating with his tongue. you arched into his touch, threading your fingers through his hair, anchoring yourself to him, to this moment.

you felt his tongue swirling and teasing against your nipple and then flattening with a hot pressure that made you even more wet than you already were. his other hand was alternating between grabbing your breast and pinching your nipple, making you let out moans that you didn’t know you were capable of. those moans went directly to his member and he could feel himself growing harder with every sound you made and every reaction you had.

his teeth grazed your nipple and then he bit it, not hard, just enough to make you jolt underneath him and moan his name once again. he used his tongue to soothe it afterwards and then he changed places to the others breast to make sure both of them received the same attention.

you didn’t know how you were holding on, your mind was full of him and your need for him, “chris… i need you now”

“i’m here love, i’m going to take care of you”, he told you before he bit your nipple one last time, a bit harder now, and started to kiss his way down your body to the place where you needed him the most.

the ache between your legs was unbearable. you pushed your thighs together, desperate for some friction. chan smiled when he noticed you doing this. his hands slid lower, tracing your thighs and grabbing your knees, pushing your legs open for him.

he kissed your thighs, giving his attention to both of them and not moving further. not yet at least.

you let out a gasp, your hips moving on their own. you were trying to redirect his attention, but his hands were still on your knees and his lips on your thighs, memorising every inch of skin he could find.

“chris, please” you pleaded

he kissed one of your things and moved to the other, “patience baby girl, we have all the time in the world now”

as much as you loved having no time limits now, you were desperate for him, you needed him and you needed him now.

you felt one of his hands beneath the waistband of your panties, slowly tracing your lips, seeing how ready and wet you were for him, “fuck baby, you’re so wet already, so perfect, i’ve missed this… i’ve missed you”

you felt your walls clenching around nothing, having him so close but not yet were you needed him. you moved your hips again and he finally obliged. he took your panties off and then dipped his fingers inside you slowly, using one finger first and then adding the second one. he curled his fingers gently, stoking with care on the right places. you were gasping for air, grabbing his hair with force - which made him let out a gutturals moan against your thigh - and trying to keep as still as you could, letting him be in control. he used his thumb to rub your clit, making you let out another moan and a broken whisper of his name. his pace was controlled, deliberate, using every move to memorise you again.

“chris, babe, don’t stop please” you begged him, which made him groan, low and genuine, the sound vibrating against your skin. he started to kiss his way up to your clit.

you whined, parting your legs more for him. he positioned himself between your legs and that’s when he finally kissed you where you needed him the most.

he was fingering you slowly while he used his lips on your clit now. slowly licking your bundle of nerves first and then flatting his tongue against it. his eyes didn’t leave your body, your face. trying to gather all of your reactions, not wanting to miss anything.

“baby” he whispered against your clit, “you’re so wet for me i’m going crazy”. his voice was low and raspy, showing how he was also on the edge of losing control. his teeth grazed your clit, delicate, just enough to make you whimper again, and scratch your fingers down his back and shoulders.

“i need you, chris” you couldn’t control the words that were coming out your mouth now, “i need you inside me, please”

“i need you, love, i need to be inside you, feel you around me” his lips left your clit and he let a kiss on you stomach, while his fingers continued moving inside you, hitting your g-spot, making you almost reach your breaking point

“please… i need you now” you were begging at this point

his fingers slid out from you and suddenly his lips were on yours again. you kissed him hungrier than you had kissed him tonight, showing how desperate you were for him. he was as desperate for you as you were for him. his hips were already pressing against yours. he had taken his trousers and boxers off at some point - honestly you were so lost in your need for him that you hadn’t even noticed. you felt his length against your thigh, just pressing against your skin but not rushing, just waiting, while he locked his eyes with yours.

he brought his hand to your cheek, slowly tracing it again. you did the same to his.

“no matter how many times you have to leave, i will always be here to welcome you home” you told him, feeling how your eyes got wet again and a couple of tears fell down your face.

he brushed away your tears while his own tears fell down his face, “i’m so lucky to have you in my life, i love you so much”, he told you for the thousandth time that night

“i love you too, my love” you grabbed his face and kissed him.

you let your lips do the talking for the both of you.

he lined himself between your thighs, pressing himself against your entrance, but not pushing in yet. he wanted to make sure you were ready first, it had been a while since you had been together intimately, so he wanted the both of you to be together every step of the way.

“ready?” he asked you while looking at your eyes

you nodded and smiled at him while brushing his hair back from his forehead, “do it please”

he leaned down to kiss you, soft and gently, while he slowly pushed in.

your breath caught. he groaned against your lips.

the stretch was immediate, hot and delicious. overwhelming in the best way possible. you both gasped and moaned into each other’s mouths.

he entered you slowly, letting you get used to his size. your fingers sank into his shoulders, leaving some scratches that you were sure you would find the next morning.

chan didn’t rush anything, he gave you all the time you needed. you both savoured every second, enjoying each moment you were spending together after having been apart for so long. feeling how your walls clenched around him, how his member was pushing all the way in until he was completely inside you. you both sighed and gasped against each other’s mouths.

he grabbed your chin, trying to make you look at him. your eyes had never shined as bright as they were now. he smiled at you. his forehead pressed to yours, his lips brushing yours as he spoke, “you feel so good, you’re always so good for me, like you were made for me”. both of you were already trembling, the intensity of everything taking control of you.

you wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him deeper and making him let a moan against your lips, a moan that you silenced with your mouth.

you kissed each other while he started to move. he started slow at first, making sure you both felt everything. your lips parted with a soft moan, he kissed every corner of your mouth.

his thrusts started to get deeper, every time making sure he angled them just right to hit the spot that made you cry and scream out for him.

he was giving all of him to you, just like you were giving all of you to him. you felt every part of each other, not just physically, also emotionally. you felt how you both had missed each other, how much you need the other in your lives. how lucky you are to have each other.

his thrusts didn’t stop, he kissed you through them, whispering your name.

“i missed this, i missed you”, his voice broke, “i don’t want to be apart from you ever again”

deep down you knew this wasn’t possible, knowing that there would be future promos and tour that would take him away from you, but you didn’t want to think about that. not now at least.

“you won’t have to, we’ll always be together” you kissed him again, threading your fingers through his head to bring him closer to you, even if that was not possible anymore. there was no distance left between your bodies, you couldn’t tell where one started and the other ended. you were connected as one, physically and emotionally.

your hands ran over his back, dragging down his spine as your hips tried to meet each of his thrusts. the pace was sensual, he was making sure you felt everything, wanting nothing but pleasure to fill you up completely.

“let me hear you please, i’ve missed your sounds” he moved his lips to your neck now, leaving more marks there in the process

you moaned his name against his ear, starting to feel that familiar knot in your stomach.

“fuck” he growled, “you’re squeezing me so hard babe, i won’t be able to hold it for much longer” one of his hands was beside your head and the other slid down your stomach, slipping it between your bodies until it found your clit once again.

“fuck, chris, just like that please, you feel so good” you moaned in response, his fingers moving in tight circles, “don’t stop please”

he brought his mouth to your ear, licking it before he whispered, “you’re so fucking cute and sweet and all mine”

“i’m yours chris” you almost screamed at how good he was making you feel, you were sure you were going to lose it at any point, “and you’re mine”

he brought his face to yours again, “i’m yours, y/n, i’ll always be yours”

he kissed you, hungrily and desperate, while his hand continued his assault on your clit and the other grabbed your hair now, pulling your head upwards to kiss you better. the new angle made your back arch towards him, making your clit brush against his fingers and the palm of his hand, making you see stars.

you were whimpering and he was fixated on you, almost like he was hypnotised. the way you felt underneath him. how your body pulsed against his.

your lips parted, letting his name slip out in a silent cry. you were almost there.

“chris… i-i can’t” you said against his lips

“that’s it love”, his lips brushed against yours, “come with me, let’s do it together”

your orgasms hit the both of you at the same time. intense. burning. earth shattering. your walls clenched around him, he pulsated inside you. he groaned in your mouth, kissing you hard and messy, while he spilled into you.

chan held you through it, like he would never let you go. you grabbed his shoulders, using them for support as your orgasm crashed over you.

he continued thrusting through your orgasms, his thrusts becoming sloppier and shorter, the aftershocks taking control of the both of you. trembling bodies entangled together.

when you both finished, he didn’t pull away. he stayed inside you while he laid his body above yours. you caressed his forehead and moved the locks of hair that had fallen there during your passionate lovemaking.

you were breathless but you held each other even tighter than before.

“i love you”, he whispered against your skin, leaving a kiss just under your collarbone

you sighed, feeling completely weak but never better, “i love you too, chris”

you pulled his head up to kiss his lips once again. delicately. you stayed like that for a long time, wrapped in each other.

after you had cleaned each other up and got ready for sleep, you laid in chan’s chest, with his hands tracing your arms slowly.

you laid there, silently in the arms of each other, and you felt how everything was right at that moment. you were both in love, in the safety and warmth of each other.

he was finally home.

[starlostjisung]

- soft hours

PAIRING: lee know x reader

GENRE: smut; fluff; established relationship

WC: 2.5k

CW: smut!! don’t interact if you’re a minor!! and also wrap it before you tap it!!!!!!

SUMMARY: soft mornings with your boyfriend are rare because of your jobs, but when they happen, they are the most special ones

soft mornings were your favourite. it was rare that your boyfriend lee know and you had the day off at the same time but today was one of those days were you both were at home and had nothing important to do or somewhere to go.

you forgot to pull the curtains of your window the night before, so now the soft rays of sunshine of the early hours of the morning were the first thing you felt on your face. warm, safe, signalling the beginning of a brand new day. the house was quiet, the only sounds you could hear were the sound of quiet purrs and meows just outside your bedroom, and the soft breathing that came from behind you.

you felt a weight on your waist. lee know had his arms around you, making it impossible for you to leave the bed without waking him up. not that you wanted to leave anyway. slowly, you turned around in his arms, letting out a sigh when you saw his face. he was still asleep, with his untidied hair and his pouty lips. he looked as relaxed as he could be, after long days busy with rehearsals and long sleepless nights.

you felt his arm tightening around you, with his hand on your back now. you took the opportunity to snuggle closer to him, resting your head closer to his. you closed your eyes again, trying to enjoy the warmth of your bed and your boyfriend for a bit more.

“good morning, love” there was his voice, slightly raspy from sleep. it was your favourite sound in the world. he pulled you closer and kissed your forehead.

you smiled against his chest, feeling happy with his gesture “morning, min. sleep well?”

he hummed in reply, closing his eyes once more and letting one of his hands slip under the hem of your shirt and tracing your skin. you both stayed there for a while, not talking, just laying in each other’s arms. both of you feeling happy of being there with each other.

“what do you want to do today?” you asked him after a bit, “it’s your first day off in a bit, you choose”

“mmm, nothing” he replied while opening his eyes and looking at you

“nothing?”

“no, nothing, i just want to stay at home and do absolutely nothing” he told you while letting his hand on your back go higher

“well, while i do love that idea that you are proposing, i think we should at least get up from our bed and feed our children” you hadn’t forgotten about lee know’s cats who were still meowing behind the door.

he let his forehead fall against yours while he let out a groan, “this is why they like you more than they like me, you look after them so well”

“that’s not true and you know that” you laughed at him

“it is true! they prefer you over me, you’re their favourite parent”

you continued laughing and he pulled away from you to look at you. he couldn’t deny that this kind of moments, alone with you, where nothing else mattered, were his favourite moments.

“you want to know something more?” he asked you

you looked at him after having calmed down for a bit, but with a big smile on your face still, “what?”

“that i like you more than them”

and with that, he kissed you. he kissed you slowly, like you were the only people that were awake in the world. like you had to keep your moments together as the most precious secret that ever existed.

he continued kissing you. he pushed you on your back and placed himself above you, trying not to put a lot of weight on you, but even then, he didn’t stop kissing you. his lips went from your lips to your cheeks, your eyelids, your forehead, everyplace they could reach.

your mouth slipped his name out, like a prayer. his lips found yours again. one of your hands was tracing his back and the other was on his hair, both trying to pull him closer, even if the distance between you two was nonexistent. you needed him and he needed you.

“minho…” you whispered against his lips, he whispered your name the same way.

he felt your tongue in his bottom lip, moaning softly as your tongue slipped in. you both felt the world around you fading away as you got lost in yourselves.

he pulled away enough to look into your eyes, “i love you” he told you

“i love you too, baby” you said while staring at his eyes, “so so much”

he kissed you again. this time hungrier. still soft but with a hint of something else behind it. he tipped your head up, trying to pull yourself flush against him.

you felt his arm going to the hem of you shirt and then, he pulled it off. you did the same with his. both of your hands were reaching every curve of your bodies, tracing every inch of skin that you found, leaving none untouched. you could feel your breath getting quicker, desperate to be even closer to him.

you gasped as you felt his mouth closing around one of your nipples, sucking and licking at it, while he used his other hand on the other breast. your hold on him became tighter, making him moan against your skin. he switched from one breast to the other, you were panting for air at this point, your back arching in response.

his hand disappeared between your legs, going above your underwear, feeling how wet you already were.

“minho…” you gasped again, your fingers threading on his hair, urging him closer.

he took the waistband of your underwear, tugging it down almost desperately. he kissed you again, a kiss that stole both of your breaths. your hand got lower and palmed him above his boxers. he was the one gasping against your mouth now

“y/n…” you kissed his neck, adding a bit pressure to your hand on his boxers until he took your wrist and placed your hand beside your head and kissed you again.

his hand slid against your folds, wet and slick with desire for him. you gasped against him, which he took as an opportunity to start to kissing his way down your body while getting to the place where you needed him the most.

he slipped a finger inside you, using his thumb to circle your sensitive clit. you held on him tight, not wanting this feeling to end. he pushed another finger and his pace became quicker, while his lips were on your breasts again.

“minho, please” you begged him

“patience my love, i want you to feel good” he said

the pace of his fingers quickened even more and the stretch was mind blowing. you felt your soul almost leaving your body.

you suddenly felt him there. you felt his breath, warm, against the part of you that was screaming for him, “please” you begged again

“i’m going to take care of you” and with that, he wrapped his lips around your clit.

your entire body was vibrating with need, his lips around your bundle of nerves and his fingers inside of you reaching all the parts that made you see stars. he had you teetering on the edge and you didn’t know how much more you could take.

“hold on to me love”, he said against you. you placed both of your hands on his hair now, your thighs shaking around his head. you felt him moaning against you and moving against the bed. he put his other hand around one of your thighs, trying to stop you from moving.

you threw your head back, bitting your lips to muffle your moans as lee know began licking up and down your slit and then, he took his fingers out from you and slipped his tongue deep, in an out of you. he switched between licking and sucking, while he used his thumb on your clit and his other hand went to your chest again, before placing it on top of your breast.

you arched your back once again, making his nose bump against your clit, almost like you were riding his face. he let out a guttural moan at than. you felt yourself getting even more wet.

you could feel that familiar knot in your stomach starting to build up inside you. you didn’t want to let go but you knew you wouldn’t be able to hold it for much longer.

“minho”, you warned him, “i’m so close”

he could feel it. he could feel your walls tightening around his tongue and how you were almost on the edge of breaking down.

he didn’t respond at first, he picked up his pace, now his tongue and thumb moving in sync, sending you closer to the edge. your legs were shaking, you were sure he could feel it, while waves of pleasure were starting to take control of you almost completely.

“let go, baby”, he told you, “let go for me”

and that’s what you did. you moaned out his name, arched your back and grabbed his hair with one hand while the other grabbed one of his hands, the one that had been holding your thigh before. you didn’t know when he had held your hand, but all that you could feel now was him, riding you through your high. he sucked harder before he pulled away completely, letting you come back from your pleasure.

you felt your breathing slowly going back to normal, while lee know placed soothing rubs on your inner thighs. he slowly kissed his way up your body again, kissing your neck while you slowly traced his shoulders.

“you did so good babe”, he said against your lips now, “so well for me” he kissed you while you felt your taste on him and his need for you. you needed him as much.

“baby, please, i-“ you pulled way from him, grabbing his arms tightly at the same time

“what do you need love?” he replied looking at you

“i need you” you kissed him again, quick and hungry, showing how desperate and needy you were for him now. your hands went down his body until they found his underwear and you took them off. you felt him looking for a condom on your drawer.

you used this opportunity, your hand took his member and you slowly wrapped your fingers around his tip and smeared the pre-cum that was already leaking there.

“y/n, fuck…”, he let his head fall on your shoulder as he placed his hands on the bed, trying to control himself. your hands were slowly tracing his member, moving up and down, making him go crazy.

he grabbed your wrist and stopped your hand, “baby, as much as i love you doing this, i can’t take it anymore, i need you now” he told you while he put the condom on and you helped him.

“please…”, you said again and he nodded quickly, while he got between your legs and adjusted himself.

he kissed you and that’s when you felt him, he pushed into you in one go. you gasped in surprise and he pushed his tongue in your mouth.

you were literally melting into each other. there was no space between you two, there was no way to know where one started and the other ended. he continued kissing you, not moving at first, letting you adjust to himself. once you told him you were ready, he started moving, slowly at first, letting both of you feel your need for each other. you looked at each other, seeing your love and connection, how you were both ready to let go for the other, how you both felt safe and vulnerable enough to do that.

he started to gain speed, starting to slam into you. your eyes rolled back in pleasure, his lips found your neck, leaving a mark there that you were sure you would need to cover the following days.

you felt his lips kissing and soothing the mark he had just left. your hands were scratching down his back and his hands were gripping your hips now, “fuck, baby, like that”, he returned his mouth to yours.

the sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room, only adding to how turned on you both were. one of his hands left your hips, moving to your clit to push you a bit further to the edge once again.

“fuck, minho…” your eyes rolled to the back of your head. you pulled him into a messy and sloppy kiss, and he groaned as you did, his fingers circling your clit faster. you pulled back and saw his lips shine and wet, he leaned in to place open mouthed kissed on your breasts again.

you tried to move your hips against his, trying to meet his movements, ”i’m so close love, please don’t stop, keep going” he told you while he switched his lips between your breasts. his tongue circled around your hardened nipple again, before sucking it into his mouth. you moaned again, feeling you were on the edge of coming one more time.

“minho…”, your body tensed

“yes, y/n”, his lips left your breasts as he came up to look at you again, “let it go for me, let me feel you”

you clenched around him, your orgasm ripping through you. his moan followed yours, his cock throbbing as he came inside you and felt your walls wrapping around him while you came. you held each other close while you both were fell apart.

he collapsed against you, both of your hearts pounding loudly. you didn’t know how long you stayed there holding each other, but you were sure you didn’t want to be anywhere else.

he looked at you and kissed you again. a kiss that was slow and tired, but also full of love and care for each other.

“stay here for a second”, he got out from you and went to the bathroom to toss the condom. he got back and you saw that he had a towel in his hands. after cleaning you up, he left the towel on the floor and got under the sheets with you again. he placed your head on his chest, and his hands on your hair and back, tracing patterns slowly.

“you with me again?” he asked you after a minute

“yes, i’m here”, you laughed and placed a kiss on his chest

he put his hands on your chin and made you look at him

“i love you so much, you know that right?”, he told you while making sure you could see the honesty in his eyes

“i know, and i hope you know i love you more” you told him while smiling

“mmm, that’s not possible”

“yes, it is”

“no, it’s not”

“yes, it-“ he shut you up with a kiss, the both of you melting against the other. feeling nothing but happiness because, while this type of mornings were rare in your household, there was no doubt that they were your favourite.

[starlostjisung]

- loml

PAIRING: jeongin x makeup artist!reader

GENRE: angst to fluff

WC: 4.5k

CW: heartbreak (get your tissues ready)

SUMMARY: a misunderstanding leads what you thought could be the love of your life to the possible loss of your life

“don’t you think i’m cute?” jeongin asked you while you did his makeup

“i think you’re annoying” you replied

“annoyingly cute?”

“no, just annoying”

he buffed at that while lee know and seungmin laughed at your response. you first met the boys three or four years ago when you started as their makeup artist but they had become your best friends now. almost like family. working together for so long, so many hours, and the constant travelling made you find a home away from home in them.

“jeongin stop moving or i’m going to poke your eye with this” you threatened him

“you said i’m annoying so i’m just acting accordingly”

you rolled your eyes so hard they almost disappeared. you loved all of the boys, you really did, but some days they could be a pain in the ass. especially jeongin. that could also be because he was your best friend so he knew which bottoms he had to push to annoy you. just like he was doing today. you swore if he didn’t stop with whatever game he was playing today you were going to-

“iyen-ah, come on, stop it. we don’t have a lot of time and y/n has to do my makeup too” thank god for hyunjin

“thanks for the warning mate” now it was jeongin’s turn to roll his eyes.

you laughed having won this battle, but you knew there would be another one. there was always a new one. but that was how your friendship had always been. easy banter.

the first time you met jeongin, not gonna lie, you didn’t get on really well. not that you hated the guy, it was just that you two were different. opposites. that shouldn’t have worked well. however, you later found out that, underneath all his quick-witted and loud persona, there was a boy who was incredibly patient, sweet and would always listen whenever you needed him. so, slowly, you started to become friends until you became inseparable.

jeongin stood up from the chair he was sitting on - so hyunjin could take his place now - but even then, he didn’t go too far, he sat down in the sofa that was right behind the makeup chair.

the three of you chatted while you did hyunjin’s make up, later adding lee know and chan to the conversation. once they were all ready, you wished them good luck and watched them go to the designated area in which they would shoot their new music video.

the boys would have different looks throughout the video, so while they shoot their parts with their first looks, you got everything you would later need for their following look. when you finished, you went to the set to see the boys recording. they looked a bit exhausted but you could also see how happy they were. they had worked so hard for everything they had achieved and you couldn’t help but feel nothing but proudness.

after the director yelled cut, the boys got ready to go backstage to prepare for the second and final look of the day. you went backstage with other people from the staff and talked about how beautiful the set looked and how excited you all were with the boys’ latest comeback.

lee know was the first to put his second outfit on, so you did his makeup first this time. you asked him if the kitchen at his and han’s dorm was ready and he told you that it would be ready the following week. you had been begging him to bake you your favourite dessert for months and finally there was not long to go now. after lee know, felix and seungmin came, both of them telling you about their games nights at their dorm and how the only music they listened to now was the animal crossing song or something.

“your favourite star is here and he’s ready to have his face made a piece of art by his favourite artist in the world” kind, funny and a little extra, that was changbin for you

“oh aren’t i lucky to have you here this lovely evening?” you replied sarcastically

“oi! not the sarcasm dripping from your voice, i’m sure everyone on set noticed it” he winced dramatically

“it’s not slander if it’s true”

he sticked his tongue out at you and you laughed at him. you loved all the boys equally, but after jeongin, changbin would probably be the one you are the closest to. you instantly hit it off, from the moment you first met. you were like siblings at this point. so the playful banter between the two of you meant no harm.

the two of you chatted while you did his makeup, he would try to tickle you, you would threaten him with poking him in the eye or something.

“come on admit it, i’m your favourite”

“that depends on the day” you told him while concentrating on his makeup

“i’m the most handsome and the smartest”

“says who?” you heard han saying when he passed by and happened to hear you conversation

you laughed at his reply while changbin tried to hit him, but then you looked up and felt everything stop. jeongin had just entered the room and you felt the air leaving your lungs - you made a mental note to thank whoever had decided their outfits for this new video.

even though you had tried to deny it for a long time, you couldn’t try to hide the obvious anymore. you had fallen in love with jeongin. at some point, between your playful banter, jokes, early mornings on set, late night take outs, coffees at the airport between flights. in the midst of it all, you had fallen in love with your best friend.

you had tried to keep it a secret because:

1. you didn’t think he would ever return your feelings, so you wanted to save yourself from pitiful glances and unnecessary explanations

2. in the rare, strange case that there was even a small possibility that he returned your feelings, you working together could make things difficult, you didn’t want people to think that you were there for your connections or, even worse, that you were dating him to not lose your job - deep down you knew nobody would ever think that, but you were still afraid

“earth to y/n, hello, still with me?” you were so lost in your thoughts that you hadn’t even realised that changbin was talking to you

“yes, sorry” you smiled and went back to finish his makeup

he looked in the mirror, trying to see what had mad you so lost in your own thoughts. and that’s when he saw him.

“you okay?” he didn’t have to say anything else, you understood everything

“i’m good” you tried to smile, but it didn’t reach your eyes and he could see it

you really had tried to keep your feelings for jeongin a secret, keyword being tried. one night after having a work dinner, changbin drove you home and you don’t remember how it started or what you were talking about, but you told him everything. your feelings for jeongin. your fear of it not being returned. your fears of it being returned and what it implied. that night you cried in changbin’s arms. you cried for yourself for different reasons. for your fear of not being enough for him. for the both of you not having met in different circumstances. for your heart, because even if it hurt this much, you would choose loving him every chance you had.

changbin could see that you were getting lost in your mind again. he didn’t need you telling him what you were thinking, he already knew. you both had talked about this many times after that night. he didn’t want to see you down at that moment, you didn’t need to go through all that right there. if you wanted to talk about it again, he would listen, but later, when it was just you and him and you could cry and talk and cry some more without the fear of being heard or seen by others.

so he did what any other friend would have done in that situation. he tried to make you laugh. and he succeeded. you laughed until you had tears rolling down your cheeks and your stomach hurt so much that you had to tell him to stop.

you were blissfully unaware of the pair of eyes that was watching you from afar, shooting daggers with his eyes. jeongin was seeing everything, feeling something inside him that he couldn’t quite name yet. something close to insecurity, fear, jealousy. he didn’t understand where all of this was coming from, he only knew he didn’t like it.

when it was his turn to get his makeup done, he was a total different person from the jeongin you had seen that morning. you tried to joke with him, he would laugh almost forced. you tried to start small talk, he replied shortly.

“jeongin, are you okay?”

“i’m fine, just tired”

“are you sure?”

“yes”

you didn’t push him. it was clear that he didn’t want to talk, so you left him be. as soon as you had finished his makeup, he stood up and left the room. you didn’t have time to go after him because as soon as he was gone, chan was there, with a big smile on his face, waiting to get his makeup done. he talked with you while you did it and while you appreciated the distraction, a small part of your mind was on jeongin and what may have happened.

~

today was an early morning too. after shooting the scenes with the second look the day before, the director said that everyone could go home and they would take it from there the next day. when you had gone backstage to pack everything and leave, jeongin had kept his distance from you. if you were in one side of the room, he made sure he was on the other side. you looked at changbin, only to find him already looking at jeongin. he looked as confused as you did, he didn’t know why jeongin was behaving like that. when jeongin finished, he left the room. he didn’t even look back. he didn’t wait for you like he always did. so with a sigh and a heavy heart, you left the room.

you hoped that today things would go back to normal. that jeongin would tell you that he had had a long day and that he was sorry for behaving like that. that he would apologise and you two would go to your playful banter and jokes. oh how wrong you were.

today was even worse. in the small and short occasions that you had to try and talk with him while you did his makeup after changing looks, he would only reply with monosyllabic words or with no words at all, just shaking his head or shrugging his shoulders.

when all of the boys were on set shooting the video, you didn’t accompany them. you didn’t want to. instead you stayed backstage, wondering what could have happened that made jeongin act this way. so unlike him, so strange, so heartbreaking.

you went through every conversation you had the day before, trying to think if you had said anything that could have hurt him. you didn’t think that had happened, and even if it had, the two of you were close enough to say whenever the other did or said something that hurt or annoyed you. you didn’t see anything weird between the boys yesterday. the shoot went well. what couldn’t you see?

you had packed all your things when the boys came back, having finished the shoot. all of them packed their things and got ready to leave. jeongin was ready to be the first to leave the room again, but you stopped him before he could.

“jeongin, can we talk for a minute?” you asked him while you grabbed his wrist in an attempt to stop him from leaving, to make him stay with you

“y/n i’m tired, can we do this other time please?” he didn’t even looked you in the eye

“i just wanted to know if there was something wrong with you, you’ve been different these couple of days”

“nothing’s wrong, i told you i’m tired that’s all”

“okay” you slowly left his wrist go

he looked at you and you couldn’t recognise his eyes. the shiny, bright eyes that you had fallen in love with were not there anymore. you couldn’t see them. something was breaking inside them and whatever it was, you could feel it breaking inside you too. he turned around and left, no more words were shared between the two of you. the silence was piercing, you could only hear your own heartbeat and your mind screaming, saying that whatever that was happening to him was your fault. and there was no way back.

changbin had seen everything that had happened between the two of you. like you, he couldn’t understand what was happening, but he could see that two of his best friends were hurting inside. that to everyone else they seemed fine, but they inner selves were screaming to be rescued, and he was the only person that could hear them.

~

days turned into weeks and weeks into a month. the situation with jeongin had got worse. a lot worse. after the boys shot the video, they had a couple of days off before they started with promo activities and such. you thought those days off would be good for him and on the second day you sent him a message “hey, i’m just checking in to see if you’re resting. don’t forget to eat and sleep as much as you can before all of this takes off again!”. he didn’t reply. not even a quick “thank you” or “you too”. nothing. he left you on seen.

when you saw each other again, things were even worse. the first days he wouldn’t talk to you. by now, he won’t even look at you. the boys had noticed this. of course they had, this wasn’t normal. everyone could tell something was going on. something was extremely wrong. while you tried to be brave a put a mask on, there was one person that could see right through you.

changbin.

countless nights you had called him, crying, wondering what had happened between jeongin and you. countless nights he had driven you home and stayed with you in the car while talking about everything that had happened on set. again and again. you couldn’t come up with anything. jeongin was behaving as usual with everyone else but you, so you must be the problem.

“i just don’t understand, changbin, one minute he was fine and then… this”

“i don’t understand either y/n, none of the boys do”

“what did i do wrong?”

“y/n don’t blame yourself for this, you did nothing wrong i’ve told you this”

“but changbin it makes no sense why he’s behaving like i don’t even exist, like he would rather turn himself into a worm rather than be anywhere close to me or even talk to me” you told him through tears. you had been over this a million times and you still couldn’t understand what was happening. why your best friend had gone from being next to you all the day, to pretending that you didn’t even exist. that he would rather not know you at all.

“i know you probably don’t want to hear this, but i think you should try to talk to him about this”

“and you don’t think i haven’t tried that changbin? i tried thousands of times when he started to behave like this, but i just can’t do this anymore. the way he won’t even look at me, the way he will pretend i don’t exist, i just… i can’t do this anymore”

that’s when you broke. completely. changbin could see everything. the exhaustion. the tiredness. the pieces of your broken heart that had been scattered everywhere. and at that moment, he was the only one trying to pick them up, but he wasn’t the one that could put them back together again.

~

it had been almost two weeks since that night. the boys had gone back to recording after the promo ended, so you were not needed for a while. and while you tried to, you didn’t leave your house. you didn’t feel strong enough to do it. each time any of the boys - minus jeongin - sent you a message to meet up with them - “we’re having dinner at felix and seungmin’s dorm”, “”we’re going to the cinema”, “we’re having a game night”- you would reply saying you couldn’t meet them, using whatever excuse you had come up with that day.

the only one who knew that you were lying was changbin. he had gone to your house one day after you had replied chan telling him you couldn’t go to watch a movie at their dorm because your friend was in town and you were going to see a musical. changbin knew you had been lying all along and while he wasn’t completely happy with that, he could understand why you were doing it.

“you can’t stay like this forever y/n, you need to go on with your life”

“i know, but i feel like i can’t” you told him honestly

“you can do it, and i’m going to be with you, every step of the way. i know it may not seem like it right now, but i’m sure everything will go back to normal”

“how can you know?” you told him with a sad look on your face, he couldn’t dare to see you like this anymore

“i just know” he told you while holding your hand. because, deep down, he thought he already knew what was going on. and he was going to make sure it stopped now.

~

the next morning you found yourself in café near your house after changbin had texted you earlier telling you to meet him there in an hour - “no excuses, if you don’t come i will go to your house and drag you there myself”. you appreciated his efforts, you really did. you were really lucky to have him in your life.

you were waiting for him, checking your messages when you heard a voice saying your name. not changbin’s voice. jeongin’s voice.

“y/n”

you looked up and saw jeongin there, standing there next to your table. his eyes were bloodshot. his cheeks red, like he had run a marathon. you didn’t know what was going on. why was he here? where was changbin?

“jeongin what are you doing here?”

“i’m here to see you”

“how did you know i was here?”

“changbin”

at that moment you understood everything. you weren’t meeting changbin. you never were. he had made you go to the café to meet jeongin.

“can i sit here, please?” he asked you nervously

you nodded your head and he sat down. you couldn’t recognise the person that was in front of you. you couldn’t recognise yourself neither. the two people that were sat at that table were very different from the people you two used to be. you wanted to felt your heart breaking one more time.

“y/n i wanted to tell you how sorry i am for the way i’ve behaved this past month”

“apologise?” you didn’t know how to feel

“yes, i know you didn’t deserve how i treated you and for that i’m really sorry and i will never do it again and i-“ you cut him off

“jeongin, do you even know how i have felt this past month?” you were furious

“y/n i-“

“no jeongin, you don’t get to treat me the way that you’ve done and now come here, say how sorry you are, and expect me to accept it and run straight to you and go back to how things were. that’s not how this works” even though you wanted to do exactly that, he had hurt you. a lot. and he needed to know that

“y/n i don’t expect any of that, i truly don’t, because i’m extremely aware of the awful way that i’ve treated you and how hurt you must have been”

“really? how can you be so sure?”

“because i’ve felt the exact same way” he almost shouted. not at you, just out of frustration. and you could see it in his eyes, that he had been hurting too. it wasn’t enough to completely forgive him, but it was a start.

“then why did you treat me that way?”

“because i’m in love with you!”

time stopped. you felt your breathing stop. you saw his eyes getting bigger when he realised what he had said. you were completely lost, you didn’t understand what was happening.

“you what?”

“please, listen to me, let me explain. i will tell you everything and if after hearing it you don’t want to do anything with me, i will leave. but please just, give me an opportunity”

he took your silence as a sign to continue

“the first day when we shot the video, after we changed our outfits the second time, i went so you could do my makeup and saw you and changbin hyung talking and laughing and you looked so happy. and i wasn’t the person making you smile like that. at that time i didn’t understand why i suddenly felt so small and insecure, but now i do. i was jealous but i didn’t know because that was the first time that that happened. and i was angry at myself for feeling that way and not knowing what was happening or why i was feeling like that. i wasn’t angry at you, i never was. but instead of talking with you about it, or with any of the members, i kept it to myself but it only got worse. i now understand what was going on, that i am in love with you, but i thought you wouldn’t feel the same about me, so i distanced myself. and i knew it was going to hurt me, but i thought it would be better for you. had i known i was going to hurt you like that, i wouldn’t have done it y/n please, you have to believe me” he had tears in his eyes, yours had too

“how could you think that distancing yourself from me wasn’t going to hurt me?” you couldn’t help the tears that fell from your eyes

“i know, i was stupid i can see it now, but i wasn’t thinking, i was just trying to make it day by day. i never wanted to hurt you”

“you hurt me a lot, but i believe you” because you did, he may have hurt you and it was going to take time to forget everything that had happened, but you honestly thought he didn’t do it with bad intentions

“jeongin i don’t know what to say i-“

“you don’t have to say anything. i just wanted to give you an explanation, you deserved that. and i know you may not feel the same way and i promise this won’t change anything if you don’t, but i wanted you to know that i’m in love with you, i need you to know that” the look he gave you was a mix of fear and hope, of the possibility of risking everything you had or starting something new together

you could’t keep it a secret anymore. not when you had been so close to losing him once. not when you had almost known what it’s life without him

“i’m in love with you too”

“what?” he was genuinely surprised

“jeongin i’ve been in love with you for months, but i never said anything in case you didn’t feel the same or we could complicate things”

he was the one crying now. tears of happiness that mimicked your own. tears that sealed a new beginning for the both of you

~

“i can’t believe you were jealous of changbin” you laughed while you walked out of the café

“i know, you should have seen him last night when he came to our dorm after he left your house and i explained him everything. i’d never seen him so angry! but after i told him what was going on in my mind, he understood. i mean, he wasn’t happy with how i had treated you - and he’s right about that - but he could see why i had behaved like this”

after confessing your feelings for each other, you talked about how to go from there. you told him that it would take time to get you to trust him completely again, and he promised to give you all the time you needed. you also talked about your feelings and what this implied. you didn’t want to be just friends anymore, so you would take things slowly and communicate everything that you felt was necessary to avoid any unwanted situations like the one that had led you to this place. it may have been a happy ending, but the road had been anything but that.

while you were walking along the street, his shoulder was brushing yours every few steps. you caught him glancing down at your hand a few times. you laughed at that.

“you okay?”

“yes, okay, i’m fine, totally fine” he replied while opening and closing his hand, not knowing what to do with it

you decided to choose for him and took his hand with yours. he looked at you surprised. you kept walking, smirking like nothing had happened.

“i’m really happy right now y/n” he told you honestly

“me too” you replied while looking at him

he stopped you and looked at you. your faces were extremely close. none of you moved for a moment. until he did.

he kissed you. it wasn’t rushed or fast. it was slow. sweet. showing you how much he had kept to himself all this time. how relieved he was you were here. how sorry he was for everything he had put you through. how hopeful he was for you future together.

your lips were saying the same thing. how scared you had been without him. how lucky you felt to be on his arms again. how ready you were to fall into him completely.

you pulled apart. then the both of you smiled. the kind of smile that hurts your cheeks but makes everything else feel small. the kind that is bright and hopeful. you leaned into him. he opened his arms. and somewhere between the past heartbreak and the hopeful future, you knew you would be okay.

[starlostjisung]

- that’s when you happened

PAIRING: changbin x reader

GENRE: fluff; established relationship

WC: 1.2k

CW: mentions of alcohol; reader being drunk

SUMMARY: while walking home with your boyfriend, your drunken mind confesses somethings that make your boyfriend fall more in love with you

it was past midnight and you were close to your house now. only three blocks away. the problem was that the shots you had taken before still had an effect on you, so what could normally be a 5 minute walk, was going to be at least 10 minutes now. especially with the high heels you had decided to wear tonight. past you hadn’t really thought about all this. future you was going to regret this. a lot.

you sighed, sinking deeper into changbin’s side. he had his hand pressed protectively and securely around your waist. he hadn’t had as many drinks as you, so he was the responsible one out of the two of you, the one in charge of making sure you made it home in one piece. not as easy as everyone would think.

“would you still love me if i was a worm?” you drunkenly asked him

“what?” he couldn’t help but laugh your question

“if one day you woke up and saw that i was not a person anymore and that i had suddenly turned into a very small and colourful worm, would you still love me?” you asked him again, more elaborate this time

“why small and colourful?”

“changbin!” you hit his chest

“okay okay” he laughed at your reaction

you knew you were not in your right mind but still, you wanted to know his answer. you had seen it on tiktok or something and made a mental note to ask him the question at some point. it seems like your drunk brain decided the right moment was now.

“if one day i woke up and saw that you had turned into a small and colourful worm, i would still love you with all my heart. i would keep you in my pocket and then take you everywhere with me, so we would always be together”

you stopped walking after hearing his answer. you looked at him and started crying. maybe it was all the drinking from before what made you react like this, but you didn’t care. his answer made you really emotional all of a sudden.

“oh changbin” you threw yourself at him. luckily he was able to catch you, with his arms around your back and yours around his neck.

“it’s okay love, don’t cry please” he laughed while trying to get you to stop from crying

“babe that was so beautiful, i would love you too if you were a worm as well”

“i’m glad love” he replied laughing

“we could be worms together, we would be the cutest worm couple in the world” you told him through laughs and tears

“i’m sure we would babe”

you pulled apart from him and a sudden wave of tiredness hit you.

“i’m tired, please carry me home” you put your arms up towards him like a small child.

he laughed at you and with a smile adorning his face, he crouched in front of you so you could get on his back. once you were secured, with your arms wrapped around his neck and yours legs around his waist, he started walking towards your house again. the weather was starting to get a bit colder, but you would be home soon.

you sighed, leaning your head against his neck, letting the air relax you a bit. the only sound that could be heard on the street was his steps against the pavement. the rest of the world was quiet. like you two were the only people awake and living at that moment. you felt content.

“i remember the day i fell in love with you” you suddenly said

“you do?” he asked you

“i do, it was the day when we celebrated chan’s birthday in his new dorm with jeongin”

“but that’s the first time we met”

“exactly”

“there’s no way you fell in love the first time we met” he told you a bit sceptically

“yes i did! i remember walking into their dorm, and seeing you standing there and you were just so beautiful and had such bright eyes and a big smile that i was instantly taken back” you couldn’t stop the words from leaving your mouth. not that you didn’t want him to know, it was just your drunk mind had decided to spill every single thought you had ever had.

“and then you introduced yourself and i felt something inside me, like i had known you my entire life, even though i knew we had just met” you continued

“well it’s true that we didn’t separate from each other that night” he said

“and we haven’t separated ever since” you smiled brightly, leaning your head against his neck more.

he continued walking you both, this time in silence while enjoying each other’s company. changbin could feel his heart growing bigger and what you had just confessed. he knew that you loved him with everything you had, but still, these quiet moments, these special corners of your heart, always managed to leave him speechless. he couldn’t believe how lucky he was that he had found you and had you in his life. he hoped he could have you forever.

you had almost arrived to your house when you, half-asleep, said: “i would go back to the night we met a thousand times if it meant that i would meet you every time”

perhaps it was the quiet of the night, or the magic that surrounded you two, but your confession managed to bring tears to his eyes. your love for each other was always there, it was safe, it was home.

a blush fell over his cheeks, but you couldn’t see it. however, you could feel how in love with you he was. how he would always keep you safe and do everything he could to make you happy. you had found love right where you were and there was no way you would ever lose that.

you arrived to your house, although you didn’t notice until he put you down and you felt the fresh, new sheets you had put on your bed that morning. you felt the warmth of your room, the moonlight that had managed to get through your curtains, his hand leaving your back and legs only to take off your shoes and help you to take the rest of your clothes off and put your pyjamas on.

once you both were ready for bed, he got under the sheets with you, placing your head on his chest and placing both his arms around your back to keep you safe against with him.

you had fallen asleep already but changbin didn’t want to sleep, not yet at least. he kissed your forehead, his lips lingering there for a bit before he moved them to the top of your head, leaving another kiss there.

he swore you were the best thing that had ever happened to him. he could feel himself falling in love with you more every day that you spent together. he had been so close to packing it up until you happened.

he looked at you and could almost see the starts in your lashes with the reflection of the moonlight. his arms were tracing soft patterns against your back, like lulling you to continue sleeping, peacefully, with him. where you should always be.

before he fell asleep, he brushed a stray lock of hair from your eyes while he softly said: “i swear that i wasn’t looking for someone, but that’s when you happened”

[starlostjisung]

- five star michelin

PAIRING: felix x reader

GENRE: fluff; established relationship

WC: 1.3k

CW: make out

SUMMARY: it was your birthday and after deciding to have a quiet night in with your friends to celebrate, your boyfriend decides to help you with his baking skills

i’m so happy seeing all your reactions to my stories, thank you so much!! as always, your comments and thoughts are deeply appreciated and i hope you like this story <3

“can you pass me the big bowl over there?”

“this one?” felix asked you

“yes thank you”

it was your birthday and, while your boyfriend wasn’t a great chef - you had seen the disasters that he and seungmin had cooked before - he offered to help you to prepare the cupcakes you were making for your party. later that day, all of your friends would go to your house to celebrate your birthday and while you were going to order food, you wanted to make the dessert yourself.

everything was going great till that point. you were making cupcakes of different flavours and decorating them as well. most of the cupcakes were already done and you only had to finish the last batch.

you were busy filling all the cupcakes liners so you could get them in the oven when you felt something sticky on your cheek.

“felix!”

“wait, it looks like there’s something on your cheek, hold on i’ll get it”

he had smeared chocolate on your face without you knowing. he put his arms around you waist from behind and kissed your cheek to lick it off.

“there, all gone!” he smiled at you

“you’re an idiot you know that?”

“yes but i’m your idiot”

moments like these were your favourite. where it was just you and him and nothing else mattered. you continued filling the liners you had left.

“you’re so beautiful you know that?” he told you

“you think so?” you blushed even after having heard those words a thousand times before

“oh i know so” he kissed your cheek again and put his head on your shoulder watching you while you finished

once you put the cupcakes in the oven, you turned around and put your arms around his neck

“hi”

“hi beautiful”

he bent down and kissed you. slow and sweet. just like the cupcakes you had made. felix always made sure you knew how much he loved you. and he showed you that every day in anyway he could. unfortunately you needed to breathe, so you broke the kiss but felix had another idea on his mind. he started giving you small pecks. everywhere, on your forehead, on your nose, on your cheeks, on your collarbone. you started laughing.

“felix stop it you’re tickling me” your stomach started to hurt from all the laughter

he suddenly picked you up and you instantly wrapped your legs around his waist. he walked both of you towards the couch, where he sat with you on his lap. you clung to him playfully and still giggling.

“a penny for your thoughts” you told him because the way he was looking at you was a bit suspicious

“nothing, i was just wondering how i got so lucky to be with you that’s all”

“don’t say that, i’m the lucky one” you hid your face on his neck while he laughed at your reaction. you had been together for almost a year but you were still a bit shy whenever he complimented you.

“don’t hide from me please, let me look at the birthday girl”

you looked at him again and smiled, both of you feeling happy and at peace at that moment. his arms stayed wrapped firmly around your waist and he swayed you both gently side to side.

“do we have everything ready?” he asked you

“yes, we will order the food later, the table is set and the last cupcakes are in the oven, so once they’re done and we’ve decorated them, we’ll be done”

“so we can do other things right?” he gave you a cheeky look while his hands started to wander a bit lower

“felix the cupcakes will be done in 20 minutes” your warned him

“that’s more than enough” he replied

he leaned in and you met him halfway. the kiss was tender. familiar. the kind of kiss that made the rest of the world go quiet. where the only thing that mattered was the joy of being together.

the kiss continued, lips brushing gently, hands exploring each other, even though you both had done this a lot of times before. his lips moved towards the corner of your lower lip, and then your collarbone. your neck was next. you whispered his name. he brought his lips back to yours.

the kiss deepened but it was still as soft as at the beginning. at some point, he picked you up again and laid you down on the couch, with him above you trying not to put a lot of weight on you. his fingers brushed against your hip, your waist and then slipped under the hem of your shirt. you kissed under his ear, in the spot that you knew would make him go crazy.

“y/n…” he moved his head and let out a moan against your lips

you kissed him again, while your hands slid down his arms, around his back. everywhere, trying to pull him closer to you. no matter how close you two already were, it wasn’t enough. he pulled apart and you saw it in his eyes. the relief. the happiness. the love. you saw everything in them.

he could see the same thing in your eyes. how much you adored him. how you would do anything for him. how much you loved him. you both said it often, but you could see it too.

he guided you back and kissed you softly, like you were something that could break easily. his lips found yours again, and you both shared warm, open-mouthed kisses, letting your tongues explore each other now with care and deliberation. your hands were still tracing each other’s skin, slowly and with all the care in the world.

“i love you so much” he whispered against your lips only for you to hear

“i love you too, very much” you replied in the same way

another kiss found its way between you two, a bit deeper and hotter this time, but still controlled. there was no need to rush.

“you’re the greatest gift i’ve ever received” you told him between kisses

he hummed against your lips. one of his hands slipped behind your thigh, gripping it gently.

you arched gently into his touch as his lips closed around that particular spot on your neck. he knew what he was doing. his tongue swirled, teasing, and then he pressed an open-mouthed kiss that made you shiver.

“i’ve missed you so much” he had returned home last week from touring, and even though you had spent the entire week together, it wasn’t enough to make up for the time you had spent apart. not that you were complaining.

“i missed you too” you took his face between your hands so you could see his eyes.

you were smiling to each other and were slowly leaning in when you smelt it.

“what’s that?” you asked him

felix was lost for a second until he realised what it was.

“the cupcakes!” he yelled and got up from the couch, running to the kitchen.

you laid there, still feeling a bit warm about your full-on make out, but also not wanting to see the chaos that was probably the kitchen now.

“okay i’ve got good and bad news” felix told you entering the living room again, with a sheepish look on his face

“bad news first please”

“the cupcakes are completely burnt, i’ve thrown them way” he told you

“and the good news?”

“we will have to bake together again”

he jumped on you, hugging you like you were going to go away if he opened his arms just a tiny bit. you laughed uncontrollably while hugging him back. you stayed like that for a bit until you decided that you had to go to the kitchen and start making the last cupcakes again. but it didn’t matter how many times you had to do that. because as long as you had felix by your side, you could do anything.

[starlostjisung]

- photograph

PAIRING: bang chan x reader

GENRE: fluff; established relationship

WC: 1.6k

CW: none

SUMMARY: while the world outside is quiet, chan and you take a trip down memory lane while looking at pictures of your memories together

hi!! time again for a new story, and it’s bang chan’s turn now!! i’m slowly getting the hang of this and i’m also happy seeing your reactions so i wanted to take this opportunity to thank you!! hopefully you like this story too <3

“we haven’t used this in a long time, shall we keep it or throw it away?” chan asked you

you turned around to see the object he was talking about

“throw it, i don’t think we’re gonna use it anyway”

“okay” and with that he went to the kitchen to continue cleaning

it was sunday morning and the both of you had the weekend off, which didn’t happen very often to be honest. after enjoying the previous day to yourselves - you had a quiet and lazy morning in bed, went out to eat and watch a movie afterwards and came home to have dinner and make love until the early morning - you decided that today you both were going to clean your house. not the most interesting and fun plan but what could you do.

you had already cleaned most of the rooms and were already with the last two: chan was cleaning the kitchen and you were cleaning the living room. more specifically, the shelf where you had some books and also your photo albums. while taking them to clean the shelf, a photo came out of one of the albums and you bent to pick it up from the floor. when you saw the photo, you couldn’t help the smile that adorned your face at the sight of it.

it was a photo of chan and you in london when you when to see the boys perform in hyde park. it was a surprise for chan, he didn’t know you were going and that’s what the photo showed. the moment when you saw and hugged each other like you would never let go. it was felix who had beautifully captured the moment and sent you the photo afterwards - “i’m happy that you both are this happy, keep this forever” the message read - which you decided to print when you came back home.

“chris, come here look” you wanted him to see the photo as well

“what is it?”

he came out the kitchen and sat on the sofa with you. he saw the photo and had the exact reaction as you.

“this is one of my favourite photos of us, i’m so glad felix took it” he said

“yes, we should make him our official photographer” he laughed at that

“i still can’t believe you were able to pull that off without me knowing anything about it, or even suspecting it. i’m usually good at these things and you suck at keeping secrets babe”

“believe me, i wanted to tell you a thousand times when we called or messaged each other but the cliche of “girlfriend surprises boyfriend on tour” was stronger and did the trick to succeed”

“where did you find this photo?”

“it was inside the album, it slipped out when i took it from the shelf” you motioned the album that you were still holding

“let’s have a rest while we see the photos”

you opened the album and it was like walking into a maze of memories. it was full of your and chan’s memories. you had been together for a long time and this was a testament of that.

there were photos from chan and the boys just before they debuted (you and chan were only friends back then), photos from your graduation, photos with both of your families and friends, and photos from all the memories you had made together.

“look at this! this is from the day we went to the cinema and later had ice cream watching han river” he pointed at one picture

it was one of your favourite photos. it was when you and chan had started dating, so it was early days. you two were walking the line between friends and something more. already aware of the other’s feeling and after talking about wanting to have more than a friendship. still, you both felt like you were walking into something very exciting and magical, getting to know each other again after all these years and also seeing the other person in a different light.

“i remember that you dropped my ice cream on my new dress and apologised like a thousand times” you laughed at the memory

“oi! don’t blame me i was super nervous, it was one of our first dates and i wanted it to be perfect”

“and it was perfect because it was us” you told him honestly

you continued watching the album, seeing more family photos, photos from your different trips - “i remember i had this photo of us in new york as my lock screen for a long time” he said - photos you took of the boys backstage - “i’m glad lee know doesn’t know i have this photo of him with a face full of cake, otherwise he would kill me” you told him while laughing uncontrollably.

it made both your hearts grow bigger, seeing how many memories you had made together and, hopefully, how many more you would make.

“i remember this day. we went to australia last year to the wedding of one of your parent’s friends” you said while looking at a photo that showed you and all of chan’s family altogether in front of the beach.

“we really had a lot of fun that day, didn’t we?” he said while laughing at the memory

“i remember that my feet hurt like hell the next day because i had been wearing heels the entire day and i spent the whole night on the dance floor with you”

“and my dad”

“and your dad”

you burst out laughing. the wedding had been an absolute dream. it was on the beach, for only a small group of people, and afterwards a quiet night dinner in a restaurant that was close to the beach too. after having dinner and hearing - and crying - with the speeches that friends and family gave for the occasion, the party started. you and chan were almost the first ones to the dance floor, because that’s one of the things that make you the happiest in the world. dancing in weddings. of course chan knew this, so how could he not grant you that wish. how could he not do that when you looked so damn beautiful looking at him with stars in your eyes. how could you not dance with him when his smile was the brightest thing you had ever seen in your life.

“you know, that day was the day that i realised that i wanted to marry you” you confessed. you both had talked about marriage before, but you hadn’t mentioned this until today.

“really?” he replied

“yes. of course i had had fantasies about us getting married before, but nothing completely serious because of what could happen, the future, and all that stuff. but it was this day that made me want that for us some day in the future. like a hundred percent. i wanted to dance with you like that again, but this time being our wedding with our friends and families with us”

he went quiet after that and for the first time, you stopped looking at the pictures and looked at him only to realise that he was already looking at you.

“what?” you asked him

he didn’t reply. instead he kissed you. slow, sweet, quiet. like the world outside didn’t matter and the only thing that was important were you, him, and this album that was full of your memories. he broke the kiss but even then he didn’t go too far. he let his forehead rest on yours.

“do you know that that day, my mother asked me about marrying you?”

“what? you never told me that before” you retreated a bit to see his face better

“it was when you and hannah were outside taking photos of the happy couple and i was sitting there just looking at you, seeing how beautiful you looked and imagining that one day that was going to be us”

“chris…” you felt your eyes start watering

“she sat next to me and asked me what i was thinking, and i told her that i was just looking at you and how happy and excited you looked. she just smiled and said that she knew one day it would be our turn, that i had to hurry and propose before you got tired and did it yourself”

you laughed through your tears, which had spilled a bit now. you knew chan’s family loved you, they had always been very welcoming and supportive, but hearing him saying this was different.

“of course there is this important factor that comes after me proposing, which is you saying yes but that is something that we didn’t discuss because who would want to be nervous and stressing about this minimal detail about a wedding, right?” he joked with you

“yes right, that detail is minimal, there’s no need to worry about that, it’s not important” you continued his joke

you continued laughing while looking at each other. your laughs got quiet slowly, but your smiles were still as bright.

“just so you know, so you don’t have to be nervous or stressed about this minimal and unimportant factor, my answer would always be yes” you replied honestly while smiling. no matter how, when or where chan hopefully proposed, you would always say yes to a life with him

“i’m really happy you said that” he smiled even bigger.

because little did you know, in his drawer, there was a small ring box that was waiting to be opened after he asked a certain question that he hoped would be answered with a yes.

[starlostjisung]

- 3 a.m.

PAIRING: lee know x reader

GENRE: fluff; angst; friends to lovers

WC: 4.3k

CW: mentions of alcohol, cheating (ex boyfriend)

SUMMARY: it’s funny how you always seem to new things the same way: at 3 a.m., in the back of a taxi, with your best friend lee know

hi!!!! i’m back with a new story, a lee know one! i’ve been reaaaally excited about writing and showing you this one. it’s been heavily inspired by one of my favourite songs: new york by ed sheeran. your thoughts and comments are always deeply appreciated and i hope you love this one as much as i do <3

it was almost 3 a.m on a friday night and you were in the back of a taxi with your friend lee know. the night had started as normal as any other night and it ended up becoming one of the worst nights of your life.

you had gone to chan and i.n’s dorm to celebrate changbin’s birthday. it had been a normal, quiet night in, just the boys, some other friends and you. you had gone there early, had dinner, opened his presents and drank for a bit. a pretty normal birthday. but then, one of changbin’s friends suggested going out and after agreeing with him, you went to a club that was not far away from their dorm. this is how your world started to turn upside down.

you went inside the club, ordered some drinks and went to the dance floor with your friends. when changbin and seungmin were having a dance off, you thought you saw a familiar face at the back of the club, but you brushed it off. later, when you came out of the bathroom, you saw them again, but this time you could recognise this familiar face. how you wished you hadn’t.

it was your boyfriend. the same boyfriend that had told you some hours ago that he couldn’t go to changbin’s birthday with you because he was feeling under the weather. the same boyfriend that had his lips locked with some others that were obviously not yours. the same boyfriend that was cheating on you.

you felt like you couldn’t breathe. what happened after that is still a blur on your mind. you remember going to your boyfriend and getting him away from that girl. lee know appearing and taking you away from him. you screaming and insulting your now ex. chaos. disaster. heartbreak.

“he doesn’t deserve you, y/n, he’s a dickhead and a complete idiot” in the back of the taxi, lee know was trying to comfort you. minho and you. you both have been best friends since you were little kids, so it was no surprise that he got on the taxi with you and insisted on taking you home and spending the night with you. you had been through everything together, so you finding out your ex had been cheating on you was no different.

“what did i do wrong, minho? was it my fault?”

“you did nothing wrong, don’t you dare blame yourself for this. he’s the only one to blame. he lied to you and then went out with some other girl, who knows if this is even the first time he does this”

you didn’t want to believe that but he was right, you had caught him this time, but maybe it hadn’t been the first time that this happens.

“i don’t know minho, i don’t know how to feel. i’m angry but at the same time i’m sad. i don’t want to blame myself for his mistakes but i can’t help but do exactly that. i’m heartbroken”

“and it’s completely normal to feel all of that at once and nothing at the same time. just don’t forget that you do not deserve any of this, and nothing that has happened is your fault, don’t blame yourself”

you wanted to believe him but this wasn’t going to be an easy road. you would get there, but it would take time. and at that moment, at 3 a.m., you felt your world crashing down.

~

time passed and some weeks later - three or four, you couldn’t remember at this point - you found yourself in the same space. 3 a.m. in the back of a taxi with lee know. he had gone to your house that evening to check on you and how you were doing after the breakup. it was like a routine at this point. calls to remind you to eat something “i’m going to the studio right now, but make sure you have breakfast before you leave your house”. texts to let you know what he was up to as a way to keep your mind occupied “i want to buy the blue ball for the cats but the boys think it might be too much, what do you think?”. and unannounced visits to your house - not like he announced himself before the breakup.

so when he arrived and saw that you were in your pijamas, eating ice cream and watching a kdrama while sobbing - we live for the drama here - he thought that was enough. he made you change your clothes, wash your face and leave your house with him. where were you going? that wasn’t important.

you went out to have some dinner first, trying to make a bit of conversation which consisted in him telling you about the latest comeback and the tour that was coming up in a couple of months, and you replying with monosyllabic words. he understood that you were like this, but he was hurting to see you this way.

he was going to walk you home, but the weather had other plans. a sudden storm made you change your plans and call a taxi to take you home.

“it’s an upbeat song and i think stays are going to love it, and if we sing this one on tour, i think we could do something amazing on stage” he was telling you and bless him, you were trying to listen but you just wanted to go home, get in your bed and cry until you fell asleep.

“that sounds great” lee know sighed at your answer

“y/n… look at me” and you did

“do you remember when i got cut out from the group before we debuted?” he asked you

“yes”

“and how you were there for me through the bad parts of it?”

“yes”

“and then it all changed. i came back and we debuted and everything was good at the end, right?”

“yes” you couldn’t understand where he was going with this

“this is the same. well, not exactly the same, but you’re going through something bad, i get it, and it’s normal for you to feel this way. but you’re going to get through this, because you always do, that’s who you are”

“but minho, i’m tired of feeling like this, this shouldn’t have happened”

“no you’re right, this shouldn’t have happened and it sucks that it happened, but what you have to do now is let yourself feel everything and then, let it go. everything is going to get better, because you can do this. and i’m going to be there with you, just like you were there for me. you are stronger than this, y/n, i believe in you. i will be here every step of the way”

after hearing him say that, you burst out crying and he held you. he didn’t say anything else, just held you. in his arms, in the back of a taxi at 3 a.m., where you had felt yourself hit rock bottom some weeks ago but now could feel yourself starting to get up again.

~

“horror movies?” han asked

“no, they’re too obvious, you know what’s going to happen” lee know replied

“romantic movies?” he tried again

“they’re even worse han, they use the same lines, the same storylines, and try to get away with it”

“and they do! people watch them and they enjoy them” han argued

“because people want to escape from their daily life and see something that seems perfect but it’s not”

you couldn’t help but laugh at the scene that was happening in front of you. han and lee know arguing about which type of films was worse. or more predictable. you didn’t know what they were arguing about at this point. you just knew that you were happy, or almost completely happy.

you had gone to see them at their dorm after you left your office that afternoon and they suggested having dinner out and then going to the movies. you agreed and that’s how you found yourself in the back of the taxi at 3 a.m. going back to their dorm. lee know had told you that it was late for you to go home, that you should go to their dorm and spend the night with them. you wanted to tell him that this wasn’t the first time that you were going home this late but it had been a long time since you had spent the night at their dorm, so you agreed with him.

you were making progress. sure there were still moments of doubt and wondering why all of that happened, but you were slowly going back to yourself. like lee know had told you. it’s not that you doubted yourself and thought that you would never be able to go back to the person you were before this happened, but if there was one person that knew you better than anyone, even yourself, that was lee know - so you slowly going out more, genuinely smiling and making jokes and engaging in conversations was no surprise to him. he knew you were going to get there, you just needed time. and he was going to give you all the time you needed, while walking with you through everything. even if that included driving in the back of a taxi while han said that the worse type of movies were action movies.

~

you were completely exhausted. christmas was just around the corner, and with a lot of things going on, you had almost forgotten of all the christmas presents you had to buy for your friends and family. you were lucky because you had that friday off so you could spend the whole day buying everything and ticking that off of your to-do list. you were even luckier because lee know had the day off as well and agreed to go with you. not to buy anything, just to make you company he said. he had spent the whole day helping you choosing presents and making comments for some of them, “this one is good but it doesn’t seem very practical”, “a nice, long scarf, that’s a good present during winter”, “come on, y/n, this is too pink, even for you”.

you laughed a lot. you always do with lee know. but something about that day, just walking around with him doing normal and mundane things, made you really happy, happier than you had been in a while.

after you had finished buying most of your presents, you two had dinner in a close by restaurant. you talked about the time when you were kids and he ran after you trying to catch you and fell on the floor and broke his favourite cat toys. you talked about the time when he told you a joke that was so funny that the drink you were having came out of your nose. you talked about different things that you had lived together. it had been a lifetime of memories. after leaving the restaurant, you saw an arcade, a place that you used to go to together when you were kids but hadn’t gone in a while. you decided to go there for a bit, just a couple of games. a couple of games turned into an hour, an hour into two. when you realised, the place was closing because it was almost 3 a.m.

it was really cold, so you decided to call a taxi that would take the both of you to your house. “it’s really late and han will probably be sleeping and i don’t want to disturb him, so i think it’s better if i go with you and sleep in your house” he told you. what a poor excuse. you didn’t argue. because you didn’t want this night to end. not now, not ever. because this feeling of happiness, this feeling of being free and being your unapologetic self, without fear of being judged, only came out with one person. lee know. your minho.

once you where in the taxi, happiness started to turn into nerves. into uneasiness. not necessarily a bad feeling, just a new and uncommon one. the realisation of being on the edge of something, of the unknown. of something that may had always been there, but you had never realised until now. or maybe you had known all along but wanted to keep it a secret that was only shared with your heart. you thought you were in love with your best friend.

you felt your smile slowly dropping from your face as this realisation hit you. not because you didn’t like this. it was because you were afraid of what this might mean. if this was something of the magic of the moment or if it was a real feeling. everything was too much at that moment.

you looked at him, while he was still laughing at how you two had been competing against each other earlier and you had been so determined to win against him that you had ended up slipping on the floor and how the two of you had laughed at that. at that moment you knew. it wasn’t just a thought.

at 3 a.m. in the back of a taxi, you realised you were in love with your best friend.

~

“they seem very nice, and felix seems to be very happy”

“yes, it’s still early days, but they seem to be doing fine” lee know replied

“he deserves the best so i hope this works out well for him”

“well it’s not the best time for this but hopefully they can make it work”

“what do you mean?”

christmas had already passed and with the new year came the new tour of the boys. they were leaving the next morning so they had insisted on having a dinner altogether before they left. they also used this opportunity to introduce felix’s partner to the rest of friends who didn’t know them yet.

“i mean, we’re going on tour tomorrow and long distance is not for everybody, it could be difficult for a lot of people, especially if they’re starting a relationship”

“i get what you’re trying to say, but you can’t control how things happen. it sucks that their relationship is still fresh and they have to part for some time now but it’s only temporary, and it’s not like they can’t contact each other or visit or some other thing” you answered him

“i know but this lifestyle that we have and everything that it involves… i just don’t know if all of that is worth it”

“i don’t understand what you’re trying to say minho”

“what i’m trying to say is that, yes i’m happy that he’s happy, but we have a lot of work to do and we are all over the place all the time and it’s not fair for any of them to have a relationship in this situation. you can’t control when you fall in love i know, but you can try to avoid it”

“avoid it?” you could feel something breaking within you

“i know it’s easier said than done and that not everybody might agree with me on this, but personally, i think this works better for me. i try not to have any relationships because, if at any point i have to give them up or i can’t give to the other person what they expect from me because i have different priorities on my mind, i won’t feel guilty. if i can’t give my all then i prefer to give nothing at all”

what he was trying to say did not sit right with you at all, it left a bitter taste, because what if he felt like this about every relationship that he had and not just romantic relationships

“what about me?”

“you?”

“yes minho, what if one day you wake up and see you have so many things to do that you realise you can’t be my friend anymore” at first you could see his point, but the last part made you furious with him. but it also scared you. you had come to terms with the fact that he may not feel the same way towards you, so you decided not to tell him your feelings for him in fear of him rejecting you and making things awkward and end up losing your best friend. but the sudden possibility of your best friend waking up one day and deciding that he had no space for you in his life anymore was even worse.

“i didn’t say that, y/n, don’t twist my words”

“no, minho, i understood you perfectly fine. you are afraid of having relationships because you may not have time for them so you prefer not to have them at all. so what makes you think that one day you’re not gonna wake up, realise that this idol life that you have takes up so much of your time that you don’t need other things anymore? that you don’t need me anymore?” you could feel your tears threatening to leave your eyes but you didn’t want to cry in front of him. not today.

“y/n i-“ you cut him off

“save it lee know, i don’t want to hear it” you just wanted to go home

“that’s not gonna happen with us” he tried to assure you

“how do you know?”

the look that you gave him shattered everything. it broke him inside. he had seen you angry a few times, but never at him. this time he couldn’t even come up with words. he was sure that that wasn’t going to happen to you two, but the way he had made you feel so insecure about your friendship, your life together, broke him completely.

you saw his eyes. you saw how he regretted what he had said. but if he said it, he must have meant it. you couldn’t believe that this was how you were going to say goodbye before he left for tour. the taxi stopped and you saw that you had arrived to your house.

“lee know i think it’s better if you go home tonight, you’re leaving early tomorrow” you told him while not looking at him. you couldn’t do it.

“y/n, please, listen, i-“

“have a safe flight lee know and enjoy the tour” and with that, you left the taxi, your best friend inside and with your broken heart on his hands.

it started as a fun and happy night. had you known it would end up like this, you wouldn’t have taken that taxi with him to your house at 3 a.m.

~

it had been two months since that night. the boys had come back from the tour that morning and insisted on having a welcoming dinner in felix and seungmin’s dorm. they were tired but they also wanted to catch up with their friends. you wanted to see them but you were also nervous, because seeing the boys meant seeing all of them. it meant seeing lee know.

after that night before he left, he tried to apologise but you two were stuck in a twilight zone. you messaged each other from time to time to let the other one know that you both were good, but everyone could see that you were lying. maybe he had taken things too far. maybe you too. but you couldn’t deny that you were going through a delicate point in your friendship.

you both desperately wanted to fix it. so you went to see them that night. when you arrived and said hello to the rest of the boys, you saw him standing there, waiting for you. he didn’t know exactly what to do. that was until you went and hugged him like nothing had happened. because you still had missed him, above all else you had missed your best friend. he hugged you back even tighter. when you separated, you both could see the other was thinking the same thing. you needed to fix things, but they could wait for tonight. at least until you were alone.

you spent the whole night listening to the boys and their stories about the tour. how chan fell during a rain show. how han had water gun battles with stays. how seungmin had gone and become friends with an alpaca. all of them making you laugh until your stomach hurt. you had missed them a lot. especially lee know.

the night came to an end and lee know asked you if you wanted him to go home with you. you said yes. it was time to fix things.

you two were sat together in the back of the taxi, but no one was talking. your mind was chaotic. you didn’t know where to start. you didn’t have to.

“i missed you” you heard him say

“i missed you too” you smiled at him

you heard him let a sight at that. he didn’t tell you, but he had been afraid that he could have lost you with your fight before he left

“look y/n i’m sorry about what i said before-“

“no, minho, i’m the one who’s sorry” you told him honestly

“why are you sorry?” he was confused

“because you were just explaining your feelings and thoughts and i completely overreacted and made it something that was not”

“no, y/n, you were completely right to react like you did. i worded everything wrong, i could see that but i didn’t know how to fix it. i was afraid” this surprised you

“why?”

“because you were somewhat right. i’m scared that my job takes so much from me that i can’t have relationships, so i don’t have them in the first place. but the real reason i’m afraid is because if the other person sees this, that this life is extremely demanding, they won’t want to be involved with all of that and will end up leaving me”

“minho…”

“you got scared and i got defensive. because i’m afraid that this will happen to us one day, that you will realise that i’m not worth all of this time away, this long distance, these long working hours, and you will leave me”

“minho i will never leave you, i never have, and never will, we’ve always stuck together and that’s how it’s going to be” you could see his eyes watering and you felt yours doing the same

“y/n i need you in my life, you’re the first person that i go to whenever something good happens to me, the first person that i run to when i feel everything is too much and i just need to be minho again, and not lee know. you are the person that i want to share everything with, long and short distance”

“minho what are you trying to say?” you got a feeling you knew, but you didn’t want to get your hopes up

“i’m in love with you, and i know i’m risking everything we have saying this, but after what happened last time, i couldn’t live with myself if i didn’t tell you this. you thinking that i could ever leave you behind when all i want is to share every single thing with you broke me. you deserve everything, y/n, and i hope you still want me to live through all that with you”

everything broke within you. this time from happiness. minho, your minho, was telling you he felt the same way about you. he was in love with you. he wasn’t going to leave you behind - you really should have known he would never do that - he was in front of you, almost begging you, to live and move forward with him, like you always had done.

“i’m in love with you too” you swear the look on his face when you told him was the happiest you had ever seen anyone in your life

“you are?”

“yes, minho, how could i not? last time i got so angry at what you said because i already knew i was in love with you but i decided not to tell you in fear that you wouldn’t feel the same and you would leave me. but then you said that and i thought that you could leave me anyway and i was terrified, minho, i’ve never been more afraid”

“i will never leave you” he grabbed you face with his hands, really looking at you, trying to make you see how serious he was about this. whatever life would bring, it would be with you two, together.

“i won’t leave you either”

and just like that, he kissed you. soft and slow at first. like he was trying to say with his lips all that he couldn’t say all this time. like he was trying to make you see that you were in this together. you smiled and felt him smiling as well.

“why are you smiling?”

“nothing, it’s just… i’m really happy” you smiled at him

“me too” he told you

you kissed him this time, hungrier but still trying to convey everything you had been hiding. you felt his tongue tracing your lips, you opened up your mouth and gave him permission. you had your hands on his hair, his arms were on your waist. trying to get to know each other in a new way, but knowing that you were going to do it together, that you were going to walk this path hand by hand.

it was in the back of a taxi at 3 a.m when everything that you both wanted started.

[starlostjisung]

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ♡ welcome to my blog ♡ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾ ⋆⁺₊⋆

♡a :: 20+ :: she/her :: sagittarius :: masterlist

♡18+ :: minors dni!! :: nsfw space

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please do not repost, translate or steal my works!! please indicate your age in your bio. my works are fictional, they do not represent any real person.

[starlostjisung]

♡ fics masterlist ♡

f - fluff · s - smut · a - angst · g - suggestive · d - drabble · c - comfort

── 🌙 - fan favourites · 🫧 - a’s favourites

stray kids

bang chan

photograph ─ f

coming back to you ─ f, s 🫧

series: you could call me babe for the weekend ─ f, a, s 🫧

── chapter one

── chapter two

lee minho

3 a.m. ─ a, f 🫧

soft hours ─ f, s

seo changbin

that’s when you happened ─ f 🌙

we’re going to war ─ f, c

hwang hyunjin

drunken night ─ f 🌙

han jisung

this is how it’s supposed to feel like ─ a, f 🌙🫧

lee felix

five star michelin ─ f, g

kim seungmin

nowhere i'd rather be ─ f 🌙

yang jeongin

loml ─ a, f

requests

i can make it (skz x bsf college! y/n) ─ a, c

learning to breathe again (skz x 9th! member) ─ a, c