starshcwer - Tumblr blog

[starshcwer]

my tifa blog turns a year old today!!!

[starshcwer]

🐝  *  ―  𝑵𝑶𝑵-𝑽𝑬𝑹𝑩𝑨𝑳 𝑨𝑵𝑮𝑺𝑻 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑷𝑻𝑺. (  some triggering content ahead. add " + " to reverse the action.  )

[ wipe ] sender wipes away receiver's tears [ hurt ] sender hurts receiver with words [ lonely ] sender finds receiver alone in a dark room [ wounded ] sender patches up receiver's wounds [ crying ] sender finds receiver crying [ help ] sender runs to receiver when they scream for help [ nightmare ] sender wakes receiver up from a nightmare [ dying breath ] sender talks to receiver before dying [ hold on ] sender pulls receiver into their arms [ anger ] sender takes their anger out on receiver [ argue ] sender gets into a heated argument with receiver [ scared ] sender scares receiver [ sick ] sender cares for receiver while they are sick [ palm ] sender places a hand on receiver to stop them from doing something [ fight ] sender gets into a physical fight with receiver [ comfort ] sender tries to comfort receiver [ blood ] sender notices that receiver is bleeding [ collapse ] sender collapses into receiver's arms [ pressure ] sender puts pressure on receiver's wound [ slap ] sender slaps receiver in the face [ panic ] sender helps receiver through a panic attack [ lie ] sender catches receiver in a lie [ sobs ] sender sobs uncontrollably while receiver holds them [ hiding ] sender finds out that receiver has hidden an injury from them [ death ] sender just died, receiver finds out [ chin up ] sender lifts receiver's chin to stop them from hiding their tears [ fears ] sender talks to receiver about their fears [ scream ] sender screams at receiver [ coping ] sender teaches receiver some coping mechanisms [ loss ] sender is there for receiver after they've lost someone important to them [ needs ] sender asks receiver what they need [ bullet ] sender takes a bullet for receiver [ bruises ] sender finds bruises of unknown origin on receiver [ rainfall ] sender finds receiver out alone in the rain [ hospital ] sender wakes up in a hospital bed and finds receiver sitting by their bedside [ intrude ] sender walks in on receiver treating their wounds [ calming ] sender tries to calm down receiver [ inspection ] sender holds receiver's face while inspecting an injury they got [ rescue ] sender carries receiver to safety [ clean ] sender cleans blood off of receiver's body

[starshcwer]

I just think tifa’s beautiful and sweet and everyone should love her

[starshcwer]

( happy birthday, tifa! | @royalarms )

" uh - " he starts , overcome with overwhelm , and realizes he's already off to a rough start . " it's your birthday , yeah ? " he's only been pestered about it all day long , unable to find a moment for himself not only to gather composure for this inexplicably nerve - wracking experience , but to garner the courage to approach her with a decided confidence ( which , he now realizes he wasn't completely prepared for ) . a sigh pushes past his lips , as if he's ejecting the nervousness from his chest , and he places an assured hand atop his hip , slouching more comfortably into his usual posture . " i got ya something . " and from his pocket he draws a dainty silver - chained pearl drop necklace , holding it in the minimal space between them . his thoughts race in several directions , his imagination portrays him wrapping the jewelry around her neck and placing a loving kiss behind her ear . . . but this is reality , and his face grows red and instead he continues standing there , offering an awkward clearing of his throat . " to match your earrings . saw it and thought of you . " he places one foot back and his eyes drift to the side before he approaches her with obvious hesitancy . " don't really know how to put it on but . . . " he doesn't , knowing full well that he'd make a fool of himself . instead he simply leans into her space , swallowing harshly , perhaps audibly , and while he wants to kiss her lips , he shies from it and places a gentle kiss atop her head . " happy birthday , tifa . we should hang out tonight . "

her head tilted to the side, & a curious hum left her lips at noctis' hesitancy. with the date momentarily forgotten from her mind, his uncertainty confused her, but he finally spoke his question, & the pieces clicked into place. their relationship often went like this: she was sure when he wasn't, & he was sure when she wasn't. they operated in a balance, action, & reaction. & so she met his question with a confident nod of her head.

❛ that's right! you didn't forget now, did you? ❜ not that she would have blamed him for doing so. friend or not, she wasn't self––––centered enough to think that the life of a prince ceased in its forward momentum for something like her birthday, but she also found herself hopeful that he had remembered. & then the coin flipped. his confidence announcement brought an expression of surprise to her face–––– lips parted, eyes a bit wide–––– he'd thrown her off kilter with such a simple declaration.

❛ you did? ❜ the unspoken, you didn't have to lingered on her tongue, but it never made it past the thought. the sudden excitement in her chest held it back. her hands clasped together, & she rose slightly on her toes as he reached into his pocket, as if she could get a glimpse of the gift even a second sooner that way.

the sight of the necklace stole the breath from her lungs, & she rocked back to the soles of her feet almost involuntarily, as if she'd been stunned. her lips parted as she searched for her words, & yet the only thing that left her was, ❛ oh... ❜ a single syllable spoken in a soft, sweet tone.

the sight of the gift dangling before its giver brought a foggy memory to tifa's mind. her dad had once given a necklace to her mom–––– for what, tifa could no longer remember, but the memory lingered. they'd stood together so he could put it on her with smiles on both of their faces before sharing a kiss, & though tifa had made a face that had made them both laugh, she remembered admiring the moment more than she had wanted to admit.

it felt odd, for just a moment, to be the young woman receiving jewelry & not the little girl who had once coveted becoming her. the feeling was quickly replaced with a warmth that spread through her at the realization of what sort of comparison she had just made between her & noctis ( though it was also what finally shifted her stunned look into a smile ).

to match your earrings. the realization that he paid such close attention that he would remember what they looked like, even when she wasn't by his side, was enough to turn that warmth into something tangible–––– a redness on her cheeks, threatening to cross the bridge of her nose. ❛ it's beautiful. thank you! ❜

she thought he was approaching to hand her the gift & assumed that his hesitancy was because of his embarrassment at not knowing how to put a necklace on her ( words that had, admittedly, brought a few giggles from her ), & she shook her head, dismissing the thought even as she wanted to ask him to try anyways. ❛ don't worry about it. ❜ but then he grew a bit too close, & more steps followed until her head had to tilt back a bit to see him properly.

tifa could hear nothing over her own heartbeat, suddenly fast & strong, but she didn't dare move from her spot. her eyes shut as his lips pressed gently against her forehead & her breath left her in a gentle sigh. they opened again as he separated, happy to see that he hadn't yet moved.

 ❛ thank you. ❜ her voice was much softer this time, as if this was a secret to be shared between just the two of them. she nodded her head, her smile growing. ❛ yeah, we should! ❜

but instead of making plans or taking the gift from his offered hand, she hesitated. her teeth caught her lip & her gaze turned to the side in thought before she turned back to noctis, feeling a bit bold. ❛ hey...if I showed you how...do you think you could try? ❜ she wasn't dressed for such jewelry. her outfit was far too casual, & she had almost decided against her earrings, but now she was glad she had worn them anyway. despite her informal attire, she wanted to wear the necklace.  she wanted noctis to put it on her–––– a birthday wish, she'd call it.

❛ putting it on me, I mean. ❜

[starshcwer]

I am going to write tomorrow if it’s the last thing I do

[starshcwer]

( happy birthday, tifa! | @lunabrae )

" i do hope you're not working." when luna enters seventh heaven, its easy to stare. sunglasses and a headscarf do little to hide her celebrity status, accompanied by her confident stride. twin dogs trail behind her in a surveying state, taking in the status of the bar whilst lunafreya beelined for tifa. theres little time to greet her as she relieves armfuls of gifts onto the bar counter: an expensive looking bath set, undisclosed cases of what one could only assume was jewelry, and lastly, a very large --- bordering on self-important bouquet of carefully picked flowers, all coordinated in different shades of red and white. despite the fanfare, lunafreya barely refers to the newly dispersed gifts, and instead illicits a sigh of relief, and takes her sunglasses off. "because --- i'm here to relieve you. " excitement lilts near the end of her sentence, breaking her stoic facade to reach into her coat, and jingle a set of car keys in the air. " a day out. me and you, some well earned rest and relaxation. happy birthday tifa, if anyone deserves the world and more, it's you."

a curious hum left tifa's lips as the bar door opened, but the bottles ( stacked somewhat precariously ) in her arms prevented her from turning for a proper greeting. luckily, she recognized the voice–––– the light timbre & proper tone, there was only one who frequented visits who spoke in such a manner. ❛ don't worry, barret already came & read me the riot act. i'm not allowed to serve a single drink today. ❜ & yet, she was adding several bottles to remain within reach. not for work, but because she had a sneaking suspicion that the bar would be full come nightfall–––– with friends instead of customers–––– & she wanted to ensure that she was prepared.

finally, the final bottle was placed, & tifa turned around just in time to watch the abundance of gifts settle onto the bar counter. her jaw dropped & her pace increased until she was close enough to lay her hands on the bar counter. ❛ luna! ❜ was all that she could manage as her eyes moved over them all, but lunafreya paid no heed to her exclamation, continuing on with her birthday surprises. tifa's head rose to meet her eyes, watching with slightly parted lips as she pulled the keys from her coat. luna's words brought a heat to tifa's cheeks that she couldn't dismiss. the fact that she was a frequent, hard worker wasn't a new sentiment, but any acknowledgement of her work could cut right to the heart of her composure & leave her flustered. her mouth closed & opened again, trying to find the words for the thoughts running through her head. the most prominent one was the thought that this was all too much for something so simple as her birthday. she would have been more than fine with just a day out with luna–––– but she suspected the other woman knew that already, & tifa could tell from the look in her eyes that she wasn't going to simply take no to any part of her surprise for an answer. tifa sighed in over––––dramatic resignation, her hands reaching for the flowers as she spoke.

❛ you're spoiling me way too much, you know? ❜

tifa held the flowers gently to her chest, taking in the refreshing scent with gently shut eyes. her shoulders relaxed. her smile grew. if lunafreya had been at all unsure if tifa would give in, tifa suspected the answer was clear now.

❛ but alright, you win. i'll let myself be a little spoiled today. ❜

within reason, came her unspoken addition. though she didn't speak it out loud. she had a feeling that within reason meant very different things to her & luna. she set the flowers down, stepping around the bar so she could take luna's hands in her own. ❛ thank you, luna. this is all really sweet! ❜ it was then that tifa seemed to notice the canine companions at their feet, & she released luna's hands to kneel down & give them scratches behind the ears ( & a few under the chin for being so well–––– behaved ).

❛ just let me get these flowers in some water & get cleaned up a little! ❜ & then her smile spread a little wider, a hint of excitement she usually kept contained as she rose back to her feet.

❛ & maybe i can take a closer look at the presents before we go? just for a bit! ❜

[starshcwer]

( happy birthday, tifa! | @earnfirst )

" sooooooo - " he starts with silly banter , obscuring any hint of shyness with a bold grin and charging fists that circle before him ; his excitement is palpable . " you'd never guess what i heard . " he's vague , failing at being mysterious , and wrought with energy . " annd ya don't have to ! " he motions her over eagerly to a table decorated with ribbon , confetti , a store - bought cake , and a negligently wrapped gift . within the poorly wrapped paper resides a simple bracelet , a casual yet stylish red jacket , and a lavender scented candle . " happy birthdayy ! " he exclaims , arms stretched toward the display as if presenting it . in this moment , he's really hoping cloud hadn't lied to him about the date in question and hoping she doesn't notice the nervous sweat forming at his forehead.

under barret's unyielding stare & marlene's pleading puppy––––dog eyes, tifa had made a promise. the bar stayed closed, today of all days, to allow herself some extra rest ( though she suspected that there would be an unruly & familiar crowd at her door around sunset, if the secret meeting she'd stumbled upon between jessie & marlene was any indication ). this did not mean that she wouldn't be doing any work at all, however. instead, she spent a bit of time in the storeroom, taking a leisurely inventory with her notepad resting on her knee & her hair tired into a ponytail to stave off the spring heat.

if nothing else, she could admit that it was nice to be able to take her time. she scribbled her notes leisurely, humming & tapping her foot as she worked, oblivious to the setup happening just beyond her storeroom door. finally, she scribbled her last note ( she'd need to send jessie, biggs, & wedge out for certain ingredients soon ) & stood, reaching for the door with the intention to find something else to do.

only to jump when she saw she was no longer alone in her work building. her head tilted, jaw slightly dropped as a quick, questioning, ❛ zack? ❜ but he continued, pushing quickly past her shock with a grin & a teasing tone that brought heat to her face but made her smile brightly in return. before she could question anything, he was gesturing to one of the many empty tables in seventh heaven, covered with confetti, presents ( that, admittedly, looked more like marlene had gotten into a store of wrapping paper ), & a cake that was definitely far too large for her to eat on her own. her smile shifted into something like surprise, her eyes bouncing over every item at the table & then back again. ❛ zack... ❜ there were a million thoughts running through her head as she took the slow steps forward towards his surprise–––– ranging from the gratitude she felt for the gesture to the sudden giddiness that it caused–––– before she suddenly realized that her birthday had certainly never come up in conversation before.

❛ hey! ❜ she rounded on him suddenly, her tone far too bright & her smile too wide to be truly angry. she marched up towards him, finger wagging at his face. ❛ who even told you? ❜ she reached out, one arm on his shoulder & the other on his chest to give him a playful shove, laughing all the while ( somewhere in her mind, she wondered when she had become so comfortable that she felt she was allowed to be in space, welcome to touch him whenever she pleased, & able to send smiles in his direction without thinking ).

before he could dramatically lean too far, she took both of her hands in one of his, pulling him towards the table to sit beside her. ❛ c'mon! i can't eat all this cake by myself! ❜ & once they were seated, she took a moment, giving his hand a squeeze.

❛ thank you, zack. this was really sweet. ❜ & if her gaze lingered a little too long, her cheeks growing a bit pink even as no other words came, she hoped he wouldn't comment.

❛ okay! ❜ finally she released his hand so that she could clasp hers together. ❛ cake, then presents. that's the way birthday's usually go, right? ❜

[starshcwer]

( tloz: tears of the kingdom starters | @exturk )

❝ you look distracted. what’s wrong? ❞

she'd had to beg before cloud & barret's calculating, overprotective stares for a proper task as everyone did their part to prepare for their next destination. after many questions & far too much pleading, they finally relented & allowed her the task of filling their stores in preparation for their next inevitable campout. she was happy to do so–––– happy to do anything productive that involved being on her feet after resting for what felt like far too long. & yet, despite her eagerness, tifa had never begun taking a proper look at the dried mushrooms & meats or started thinking about what meals would serve the party's individual tastes.

instead, she sat alone–––– knees tucked to her chest for her head to rest on as her gaze settled in the direction of the reactor. she thought nothing of the approaching footsteps until a figure appeared in her peripheral vision, making her turn just in time to hear the question.

❛ it's nothing. the last few days just... left me with a lot to think about. ❜

the whispers, the lifestream, cloud's odd & dangerous behavior–––– that would have been more than enough to deal with, but there were so many other things on their minds, so many other things to worry about, it likely wasn't a surprise that she'd taken her first moment truly alone to gather her thoughts.

❛ thank you, by the way. ❜ her head finally turned, her body shifting to regard cissnei fully, ❛ i think all of this would have been a lot harder without your open––––door policy. & your help. ❜

[starshcwer]

✩ ° ｡⋆ Happy Birthday Tifa ⋆｡ ° ✩

[starshcwer]

It's her day!! Happy birthday Tifa!

An older piece I drew for the Premium Heart Tifa Zine project (2019/2020)

[starshcwer]

IT'S HER DAY

[starshcwer]

make no mistake: there is a nibel accent

tifa's accent was never as strong as some of the others who lived in the region, even as a kid. she had practice covering up the accent as she accompanied visitors up & down the mountain, so it was easy for the general midgar accent to replace the nibel one once she had taken up residence in the city. but, it's not something she can hide completely. rile her up–––– make her mad, talk to her after she's cried for a while, make her laugh too hard–––– & the accent slips out in a slow drawl of her vowels & impulsive nibel slang.

she can usually catch herself after a sentence or two, but if she's really excited or caught up in her feelings, it can take some reigning in.

[starshcwer]

ANYWAYS TIFA'S BIRTHDAY IS ON FRIDAY

[starshcwer]

ANYWAYS TIFA'S BIRTHDAY IS ON FRIDAY

[starshcwer]

( 𝐒𝐎𝐅𝐓 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒 ♡ | @blighteds )

"i jus'.... sleep better if you're around."

what was a soldier afraid of? what gave them nightmares? what did cloud see when he closed his eyes that scared him enough to interrupt his dreams? to stop him from sleeping? the answer came to her easily: burning buildings, the loss of everything that had raised them, & a sword that cut through their childhood without remorse. though she didn't remember him, his story had left no room for doubt. he had the memories & the scars–––– just as she did.

somewhere in her mind, she could picture him as he would have been then. somewhere between the boy he had been when he'd left & the man before her now. the image was distorted & blurry as if she was watching him with half––––lidded eyes, but she could still see him. & the thought of this cloud, injured & alone, tore her heart asunder. she knew that feeling–––– she knew that loss–––– & she knew well how the reminder could haunt one's dreams.

she had already known that she would stay, but her newfound perspective had cemented her resolve.

tifa gave into his hand around her wrist, sitting beside him on the inn bed & brushing his hair aside so she could see his eyes. how she had missed the exhaustion & the tension in his face, she wasn't sure. had she been too distracted with the others? or had he just been that good at hiding it until now?

❛ i'll stay. ❜

she pulled her hair from her ponytail, untying the laces of her boots to leave them at the side of the bed. she moved slowly, giving him more than enough time to take back his request, but instead they lingered in a silence that war far too familiar to be uncomfortable .

finally, tifa tucked herself under the covers, lying on her side to keep her eyes on cloud. she was unsurprised to find him staring back, though she couldn't name the emotion that joined the flecks of mako in his gaze. she wanted to reach for him, but her fear of overstepping turned that want into nothing more than a twitch of her fingers. instead, she lowered her voice to a whisper, speaking as though she was sharing a secret between them.

❛ are you okay? ❜

she wasn't quite sure what she was asking about. his sleep? his general well-being? how he felt about her lying beside him? whatever he was willing to share, she would be there to listen.

[starshcwer]

tloz: tears of the kingdom starters

WARNING: spoilers !

❝ there doesn’t seem to be any danger at the moment. ❞ ❝ history and legend sometimes blur together. ❞ ❝ i think you’ve caused quite a stir since your arrival here… ❞ ❝ i think you do look weird. so there, chew on that. ❞ ❝ i feel like i should apologize for dragging you into this mess. ❞ ❝ there’s no need to get so worked up. ❞ ❝ you allowed your heart to falter. that is the quickest way to fall on the battlefield. ❞ ❝ i’ll fight by your side till the very end. ❞ ❝ as with any leader, it is my duty to safeguard and protect my people. ❞ ❝ you are burdened with a mission of monumental importance. ❞ ❝ it was my hubris that set us on this path. ❞ ❝ i get it, you’re young — you feel invincible. ❞ ❝ i thought you had harder bark on you than that. ❞ ❝ this little village used to be as quiet as a dusty old tomb. ❞ ❝ i don’t know who you are, but i’m sorry you have to see me like this. ❞ ❝ i feel a lot better after talking to you. ❞ ❝ you should have seen the look on your face. ❞ ❝ please, no need to look so petrified. ❞ ❝ you’re alone too, right? alone is good. ❞ ❝ you have disgusting, unwavering commitment to do ‘good’. ❞ ❝ i apologize. i keep getting lost in my thoughts. ❞ ❝ you’re finding this all a little scary, aren’t you? ❞ ❝ did you hear me singing? how embarrassing. ❞ ❝ you might want to make other plans…if you value your life. ❞ ❝ i suppose fate really wanted the two of us to run into each other again. ❞ ❝ you use your power to crush the weak…to serve evil. ❞ ❝ you will die knowing that you failed. ❞ ❝ you heard that strange voice too, right? ❞ ❝ this is a lot to learn all of a sudden, i know. ❞ ❝ did you know if you put your ear to a well, you can hear the wailing of the dead? ❞ ❝ i see the shadow of death upon your face. ❞ ❝ it seems skill and confidence is in short supply. ❞ ❝ that pride will be your downfall. ❞ ❝ i’ve gotta say. your stories are always so wild. ❞ ❝ did i manage to keep a smile on my face? ❞ ❝ you take for granted the godlike power you have in your hands. ❞ ❝ nevertheless, i can’t shake this strange tightness in my chest. ❞ ❝ why do i get the feeling we’re being watched? ❞ ❝ sorry you had to listen to me go on and on like that. ❞ ❝ anyway, i’m sorry for teasing you. ❞ ❝ uh…what’s with the face? ❞ ❝ what was it you wanted to discuss with me in private? ❞ ❝ were you looking for me? i’m honored! ❞ ❝ one cannot accomplish great feats without allies at one’s side. ❞ ❝ it’s important to help each other in times of need. ❞ ❝ i hate the way rain feels, but i don’t mind how it sounds. reminds me of waves crashing on the beach. ❞ ❝ you look distracted. what’s wrong? ❞ ❝ things with ‘legendary’ in the title are usually just stories. ❞ ❝ do you really think i hadn’t realized your deceit? ❞ ❝ what are you doing in a place like this? ❞ ❝ i never thought i’d see such a marvel with my very own eyes. ❞ ❝ thank goodness. if something had happened to you…i… ❞ ❝ how did you find this place? what cruel ploy are you plotting? ❞ ❝ it seems that the world is still in a wretched state. ❞ ❝ enough is enough! you are not acting like yourself! ❞ ❝ i can see right through you, whether you want me to or not. you are yielding to the fear of losing someone you love again. ❞ ❝ i can see it in your face. i don’t hold that special place in your heart. ❞ ❝ light and dark - one cannot exist without the other. ❞ ❝ do not get lost in the past. you must keep moving ever onward. ❞ ❝ it is best when those who care for each other are open and honest, even when it is difficult. ❞ ❝ push yourself too hard and you become your own worst enemy. ❞ ❝ look at all those scars…you must have fought a lot in your life. ❞ ❝ i am hesitant to admit it, but our success was thanks to your support. ❞ ❝ you look very pleased with yourself. ❞ ❝ i was giving in to my fear of once more losing someone i love. ❞ ❝ hold still, and don’t fret. i’ll take care of everything. this won’t hurt a bit. ❞ ❝ did you think i’d deceived you? perish the thought. ❞ ❝ i’m always here. should you ever have need of me, you need only ask. ❞ ❝ it’s amusing, isn’t it? our little back-and-forths. ❞ ❝ i just don’t want anyone to drop dead right in front of me. that’ll give me some nasty dreams. ❞ ❝ there it is. that inexplicable smirk upon your face. ❞ ❝ what were you praying for? long life? wealth? ❞ ❝ you get even cuter when you’re blushing. ❞ ❝ it is all right. i swear it. i am not going anywhere. ❞ ❝ i never thought…never dared dream…that i’d live to see the day we could all laugh together again like this. ❞ ❝ i’ve seen enough faces in this job that i can tell from looking at one if someone’s lying to me. ❞ ❝ you’ll come visit me again, right? ❞ ❝ i hope that ours will be a long and profitable relationship. ❞ ❝ this must be what the end of the world looks like. ❞ ❝ there’s nothing wrong with asking if you can help, you know. ❞ ❝ i knew there was a bright smile in there somewhere. ❞ ❝ let’s not pretend it won’t look absolutely dashing on you. ❞ ❝ no matter. you will not live to see another sunrise. ❞ ❝ you cannot hope to escape your fate. ❞ ❝ i’m sorry. i know i’m always throwing you into dangerous situations. ❞ ❝ hear my name and tremble in fear. ❞ ❝ it seems you have met with great danger once more. ❞ ❝ i actually…secretly followed you. ❞ ❝ there’s no shortage of strange happenings these days. ❞ ❝ anyone tell you it’s rude to stare? ❞ ❝ sitting here feeling sorry for myself won’t solve anything. ❞ ❝ at my age…well, very little surprises me. ❞ ❝ there are more mysteries waiting for us down here, i know it. ❞ ❝ i’m only telling you this because you seem like a trustworthy sort. ❞ ❝ we are bound by fate, you and i. ❞ ❝ i’d have preferred to stay with you a while longer. ❞ ❝ you will have to do something about that fear eventually. ❞ ❝ now i live for vengeance. ❞ ❝ so you’re our saviour, eh? i thought you’d be tougher looking. ❞ ❝ sorry about that. the sadness just gets to me sometimes. ❞ ❝ you were involved, weren’t you? ❞ ❝ i’m sorry, i’m just surprised. i mean, you don’t seem all that strong. ❞ ❝ did i…see what i thought i saw? ❞ ❝ just forget it. it’s not important. ❞ ❝ we cannot afford to stand still at a time such as this. it is imperative that we act. ❞ ❝ disappointed that i wasn’t shocked and aghast at the very sight of you? ❞ ❝ you must be pretty strong beneath the surface. ❞ ❝ what happened? is this your doing? ❞ ❝ i can see right through you, whether you want me to or not. ❞ ❝ just watching you move, i can tell you’re no ordinary person. ❞ ❝ whatever is troubling you? why are you hesitating so? ❞ ❝ good…evil…that’s the futile perspective of narrow-minded beings. ❞ ❝ are you here because you’ve heard about me? ❞ ❝ one difficulty has been overcome, and yet another has appeared in its wake. ❞ ❝ once i rest up, i’ll be hitting the road again. i’ve stayed here too long as it is. ❞ ❝ we have to train. we have to get stronger. we have to get ready for what’s next. ❞ ❝ is everyone all right? nobody’s injured? ❞ ❝ i’m the one who made such a mess of things, after all. ❞ ❝ it is a mighty opponent, certainly, but we must not falter. ❞ ❝ what’s with that look? you don’t think i can do it? ❞ ❝ what’s the matter? you can tell me, weirdly handsome dude. ❞ ❝ why is everybody so quick to believe the silliest things? ❞ ❝ i dearly wish that i could believe what you are saying. however, at present…i simply cannot do that. ❞ ❝ wow, listen to me. with every breath, i spew out brilliance. ❞ ❝ for a long time, i have been concerned that you are holding yourself back. ❞ ❝ i feel like you weren’t getting what i was going for there. way to kill the mood. ❞ ❝ can’t talk my way out of this one… ❞ ❝ this is normally where i’d give you a chance to respond, but i’d like to talk about me instead. ❞ ❝ never forget that we are all standing beneath the very same sun. the only distance that matters is the distance between our hearts. ❞ ❝ i lost my head a little there. i’m not too proud of the way i behaved. ❞ ❝ i’m sure an answer will come to you. wisdom takes time. ❞ ❝ i must truly be getting on in years to have allowed a mere monster to catch me off guard. ❞ ❝ you really don’t know your place, do you? ❞ ❝ do you really think we hadn’t realised your deceit? ❞ ❝ you heart is like a chicken’s egg — easily given but easy to break. ❞ ❝ your wounds were severe…i am relieved to see you escape death. ❞ ❝ i’m told that your skill in swordplay is unmatched. ❞ ❝ what, you’ve never heard of me? ❞ ❝ where were you? you disappeared on me so suddenly. i was worried sick. ❞ ❝ oh my. i’m surprised to hear you say such a thing. ❞ ❝ i wonder how many times we’ve met in our past lives. ❞ ❝ so what if you don’t say what you really think. i won’t hold that against you. ❞ ❝ though our time together has been brief, i am so happy that we finally met. ❞ ❝ what’re you thinking, strolling into this war zone? ❞ ❝ you’ll keep your trap shut if you know what’s good for you. ❞ ❝ i sense a fierce battle ahead, the likes of which we have never before faced. ❞ ❝ i can feel the moonlight pouring down, cleansing my spirit. ❞ ❝ you’re not needed round here any more. ❞ ❝ that mystery just leads us straight into another. ❞ ❝ it is very difficult to rest peacefully when things like this happen. ❞ ❝ sometimes i’m so smart, i scare myself a little. ❞ ❝ ever try getting info out of a boulder? well, that boulder’s ME. ❞ ❝ i prefer to keep work and my personal time separate. ❞ ❝ sure, you look like a strong breeze could blow you over, but you are solid as stone. ❞ ❝ that pride will be your downfall. ❞ ❝ i’ve been abandoned by love…by luck…by happiness. ❞ ❝ at last…i have been waiting for you to arrive. ❞ ❝ i am stunned. i am in complete and utter awe with you. ❞ ❝ despite all we have endured, my feelings for you have never altered. they never shall. ❞ ❝ am i some sort of villain? or a force for good? ❞ ❝ i’m just fated to be unhappy. steer clear or you’ll catch my misfortune. ❞ ❝ you’re your own worst enemy sometimes. ❞ ❝ i will crush any opposition. i will rule. ❞ ❝ that’s an old dangerous road absolutely crawling with monsters. ❞ ❝ now that you’ve seen it, i can’t let you live. ❞ ❝ you look like a gentle soul who wouldn’t hurt anything. ❞ ❝ my body…my mind…everything. i’ll sacrifice it all to destroy you. ❞ ❝ i had almost forgotten the thrill of battle. that feeling as blood surges in my veins… ❞ ❝ i bet evil always scatters when you show up. ❞ ❝ it’s important to remember that luck and love aren’t things that run out. sometimes they just take the long way to get to you. ❞ ❝ i’m gonna make my ancestors proud today. ❞ ❝ this world should be shrouded in darkness, not bathed in insufferable light. ❞ ❝ it would have been more…satisfying to overcome a worthy foe. ❞ ❝ a mere mortal will not stand in my way. ❞ ❝ you’d walk away…from someone in need? ❞ ❝ you have proven yourself, and you no longer need me. ❞ ❝ i have some heartbreaking news to share. this will be tough to bear, but i ask that you stay strong. ❞ ❝ you might think of this as ‘hush money,’ and…yes. that’s what it is.. ❞ ❝ now, let’s both pretend like this never happened. ❞ ❝ you might think i’m a hopeless coward…and you wouldn’t be entirely wrong. ❞

[starshcwer]

i am well. it felt like a half––––truth, as though his body & mind were well but his heart was not. even his smile did not quite bring the warmth that she had come to expect from him. she didn't wish to pry & further than he would want, but she couldn't help but let out a soft, concerned, ❛ are you? ❜ before she could stop herself. clearly, her own question had surprised her, & she shook her head as though she could take the words back that way. ❛ i'm sorry. i don't mean to intrude, i just... ❜ worried for him were the words that lingered on her tongue, but it quickly became another unfinished sentence, fading with a soght sigh. instead, her head turned to hide her unsettled expression before he could comment on what she would bet that joshua would consider nothing but undue worry.

❛ it's no trouble. really. ❜ in the brief moment of silence, tifa sought to reassure him. they were friends, after all–––– & there began the train of thought that she had hoped not to begin to follow. they had been friends once in a time so far away that it sometimes felt like a dream from her childhood or some far off world that she had been allowed to see, if just for an instant. though her heart longed for the connection they had once had, she would not push. he deserved the opportunity to pass judgment on the woman who stood before him now & not forced to make assumptions based on the child that he had once known.

with her thoughts heading in the direction they were, his request caught her off guard. she wished she'd had something more intelligent to say in response, but she found herself speaking a soft, brief, ❛ me? ❜ as though she could see someone else lingering in the darkness. she hardly felt presentable enough to sit beside him. she was still dressed in the simple clothes she wore to tend the bar counter, & she no doubt smelled of the compound she had used to clean the tub & crown & the ale she'd been serving. she almost declined for no reason other than propriety.

but something stopped her before she could. the longing to properly rekindle a friendship that she'd once thought torn from her forever. the realization that this may be the only opportunity they'd get in quite some time to be truly alone together. she would not let this chance slip through her fingers.

 ❛ sorry, ❜ came the brief apology for her outburst. ❛ i'd be happy to sit with you. ❜ & there was the truth. no matter her surprise, her concern, joshua could have asked for few things that would have made her happier. her arms gestured to herself, bringing attention to the state of her attire. ❛ as long as you don't mind, of course. ❜

ever - wandering is the mind of a boy raised up for greatness , with a future wrought for nothingness . his fingers grip the wooden railing over the water and he elicits a release of his lungs into the atmosphere . the air is not cold , not warm ; some perfect purgatory where light winds are born and dance with strands of ginger blonde . the woes of this world plague him with ill intended mercilessness , and he is bound by the shackles of his fate . the blight wreaks emptiness over the realm , and at times , he feels , his own heart .

this entity beats within his chest where his heart should be , and it steels him from warmth , growing cold and hard , metaphorically , literally . the pain is agonizing some days , yet he treads onward . in this moment , where he tries to find peace amidst the chaos of his own cursed existence , the pain seems far away , but the weight of it never strays far . he tries to count how many ripples in the water he might see : a little game clive introduced to him off the shores of port isolde ( on the rare occasion joshua might make it that far ) . those days come to the forefront of his mind , and he remembers his favorite things : jill's borrowed novels , clive's lessons and his teasing , tifa's baked goods , father's instruction and pride , and mother's . . . protective nature .

he's far into the memories of his past when a sudden touch jolts him into the throes of reality and he jumps when his old friend's fingers find their way to his shoulder . he speaks his words of apology , and thus does she , and together they stand in a worrisome harmony . an empty smile pulls at his lips and he offers her a gentle nod of acknowledgement , of reassurance , ❛ i am well , tifa . ❜ he always assumes that those who care about him ask only of his physical wellbeing , never wandering into the confines of emotion .

❛ i meant not to trouble you . ❜ and he pauses for a moment , thinking . ❛ though . . . ❜ he almost stops himself , that he might be interrupting her from something more pressing , but proceeds , prepared for a rejection , ❛ if you've nothing to attend to , would you join me in taking a seat at the steps ? i have grown tired of counting waves . ❜