stllwiyuu

[stllwiyuu]

⎯⎯ ⠀ 🫧༘⋆ my summer wish.

[stllwiyuu]

— ♡ ‧₊˚ ⋅ .ᐟ don’t let me be alone no more.

[stllwiyuu]

Tokuno, Yushi

𝖤𝗏𝖾𝗇 𝖨𝖿 𝖳𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖲𝗈𝗇𝗀 𝖤𝗇𝖽𝗌 𝖳𝗈𝗆𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗈𝗐

(𝘈𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵𝘢, 𝘒𝘰𝘯𝘰 𝘜𝘵𝘢 𝘨𝘢 𝘖𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘶 𝘵𝘰𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘮𝘰)

yushi x reader addressed as shimizu taeko | wc : 11.6k

genre : soft angst, youth, coming of age, mild romance themes

tag : love blooms between you and the new mysterious boy from your school. you wrote a song, knowing it may never be heard. in the face of endings, some things stay forever. playlist : even if you leave / hanroro , musubizama / indigo la end , hananiblue / indigo la end , furarete mitandayo / indigo la end , let me love my youth / hanroro , panic / beomgyu , the poetry of august / lamp , a hill of the moon / ichiko aoba

( edit : i might not have proofread this thoroughly, as i noticed some errors—like riku’s name being mentioned unexpectedly. i’ve made a few edits and really hope there aren’t any more rikus lurking below! 😭 )

you snatched your coat off the rack and slammed the door shut behind you. the early spring morning air bit at your skin, sending goosebumps up your arms as you hastily swung the coat over your shoulders. you didn't know where you were going—just that you had to move. to be anywhere but home.

eventually, you found yourself walking towards your school, just minutes away from your house. the gates stood tall and quiet, only a few stragglers entering through the side. you had no intentions of attending classes today, but here you are.

you headed to the vending machine tucked beside the main hallway. you slipped in a few coins with a cold, metallic clink and grabbed a soda from the bottom slot, the can cool against your fingertips. then you made your way up the rooftop.

the rooftop was nearly deserted. a breeze tugged at your skirt and swayed loose strands of your hair. you sat onto one of the benches, tossing your school and guitar bag on the wall, then pulling out a small, worn pocket notebook from your skirt pocket and placing it beside you. for a moment, you just stared at it. then, slowly, you opened it and flipped through the pages.

every stanza of the song you wrote whispered back at you with a haunting question: was it all still worth it? all those years of ditching responsibilities, skipping lessons, and trading grades for guitar strings—was your dream of music still worth chasing?

your father didn't think so. to him, music was nothing more than an "ill's career," a fool's errand. a futureless fantasy.

you never hated studying. you weren't a genius, but you managed. enough to hope. enough to dream about getting into that music college. but when your parents, especially your father, dropped the bomb: medical school, not music, your reason to try burned down to ashes.

junior high to second year senior: failing to low-passing grades. now in your final year, it feels like every ounce of hope, every expectation your parents once had in you, had burned alongside your dreams. still, they never stopped reminding you of what you were supposed to become.

"if i can't have my dreams, they shouldn't get theirs either."

the thought echoed in your mind as you clenched the notebook tightly in your fist. the tendons in your hand strained, as you stepped toward the edge of the rooftop, raising your arm to toss it away.

"don't."

you froze at the sound of a voice behind you.

you turned your head and saw a boy approaching from the rooftop door, his footsteps casual, a hopeful smile on his lips—one that irritated you for reasons you couldn't explain. his fair skin glowed under the soft morning sunlight.

"you're wasting paper," he said with a smile. "and someone's gonna have to clean your mess. probably the school janitor. doesn't seem fair, right?"

he came to stand beside you. you blinked at him, unimpressed, then turned your gaze to the school field below. after a moment, you lowered your arm and shoved the crumpled notebook back into your pocket with a scoff.

"how is that your business?"

the boy only shrugged. "this is my school too. and i care about the environment."

his answer made the corner of your mouth twitch. you fought it but a smirk formed before you could stop it.

"you must be one of those teacher's pets," you muttered.

he then smiled again, and something about the easy way his lips curved gave you the urge to ask what's so whimsical about everything? but of course, not everyone was as aloof as you.

"no," he spoke after a moment. "no one knows me here yet. i'm new here."

you studied his face more closely this time. his eyes had a kind of calm brightness to them, something warm yet indescribable. after a brief silence, you gave a small nod.

"you don't seem familiar. makes sense."

"i'm tokuno yushi," he said, turning fully toward you now.

you smirked, suppressing a smile that wanted to show. "why do i have to know that?"

yushi sighed playfully, his shoulders relaxing as he looked away. a soft giggle escaped him, light and effortless, and for some reason, it made you smile in return.

"shimizu taeko."

"huh?" yushi turned back to you with a blink.

"i'm taeko," you repeated, a bit slower this time.

"now that i do have to know," he said, grinning before straightening his posture, smoothing out the wrinkles on his blazer with a few quick pats. "okay, taeko. i'll get going now. i've got classes to catch up on. you?"

you mimicked his posture, lifting yourself from your lean off the edge of the rooftop. "no. i'll be around later."

"okay then. see you around." yushi gave a small nod, bowing lightly before walking off. the door clicked behind him with a soft creak.

your eyes followed yushi's retreating back until it disappeared from view. then, quietly, you leaned back against the edge of the rooftop, your gaze drifting out across the wide expanse of the school field and the sky above. for a while, the world felt muted. but then your thoughts snapped back.

you remembered your notebook—the one you were supposed to throw off. you took it out from your pocket, the crumpled paper still slightly warm from your hand. you stared at it again, fingers swiping along the bent cover. you glanced at the edge again, contemplating. now that the annoying boy was gone, you could do it.

but instead, you sighed. you turned and walked toward the rooftop door, the sun casting long shadows across the concrete. unceremoniously, you tossed the notebook into the bin beside the door.

────────────♪

you eventually entered your classroom during break time. the halls were loud and busy, but everything felt distant, like a scene playing behind glass. you had already skipped three classes, but you couldn't care less. neither did your classmates, who were more than used to your absence.

you slid into your seat—the one in the farthest back, right beside the window. the sunlight streamed lazily in, highlighting the dust motes floating in the air. you leaned your head against the cool surface of the sliding window, letting the outside world blur behind the glass. the, the voices and footsteps around the room silenced into mumbles.

"shimizu-san."

a deep voice cut through the room. you didn't turn around. you knew exactly what it was. you shut your eyes and let out a breath through your nose, tired already of what was to come.

now you're standing in the middle of the faculty office, fluorescent lights buzzing above, surrounded by cubicles and shelves stacked with folders and dusty trophies. in front of you sat your advisory teacher, his desk cluttered with papers, half-drunk coffee, and a nameplate slightly askew. you kept your head low as he spoke, tone firm but worn.

"shimizu taeko," he said, voice low as he pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. he glanced down at your report card and attendance sheet, reading silently for a moment before folding them closed. he then removed his glasses and clasped his hands in front of him.

"attendance: barely two days in a week. projects submitted: three out of ten, estimated." he tilted his head slightly, his tone less stern now. "do you still want to continue?"

"please just tell me whether i need to bring my parents here or not," you replied, your voice respectful despite the weariness behind it.

he frowned. his expression not angry, but tired. pity softened his features. "shimizu-san, we can't even count how many times we've already had your parents here. we see them more often than we see you here." he sighed, a long, exasperated breath. "that's why i'm asking you. not your parents. you. do you still want to continue?"

you stared at a chipped corner of his desk. "is there anything i can do if i say no?"

"we can draft your dropout letter sooner—"

"with my parents' consent," you cut in.

he paused. the look of surrender crept into his expression. "yes," he replied. "with your parents' consent."

your discussion ended with you agreeing to ask your parents and update him later. though deep down, you knew you wouldn't.

you went straight to the music room, your steps heavy, echoing faintly down the quiet hallway. the school had begun to hush. that strange in-between hour where students milled around lazily, tired from class, waiting for the final bell. but you weren’t waiting for anything.

your hand reached behind to unhook the gig bag strapped to your back. you gripped it tightly by the neck and swung it off with a little too much force. the weight of your frustration almost made you slam it down. but instead, you caught yourself. with a sigh, you lowered it gently beside the backmost chair in the room, the one you always claimed as yours.

you sank into the seat with a slump, the old metal chair creaking beneath you. for a moment, you just stared ahead. the pale sunlight streaming in through the windowpanes painted gold streaks across the wooden floor, catching on the instruments propped in corners and mounted on walls. a drum kit, untouched. a keyboard, slightly out of tune.

unzipping the white gig bag, you slowly pulled out your guitar by the neck. the body of it was smooth, except for a hairline crack near the edge. you ran your thumb gently over it, almost apologetically. then you brought your hand down to strum the strings once, softly. the sound floated through the empty room.

you adjusted your posture, rolled your shoulders back, then brought your fingers to the fretboard. you took a breath, then strummed again. this time playing a melody you knew by heart.

your eyes fluttered closed. your head moved subtly with the rhythm, chin lifting with the rise and fall of the chords. you began to hum, then sing. not loudly, not with performance in mind, but with honesty. one of your own songs that's never been heard by anyone else.

when the last chord faded, you opened your eyes slowly, grounding yourself again. but your attention was caught when you saw yushi standing by the doorway. his figure was outlined by the light from the hallway, and he looked like he had been there for a while.

"didn’t know you were a great singer," he said, smiling as he stepped inside, weaving past stands and instruments. his voice was light, like he didn’t want to ruin the peace. "are you in the music club?"

you let out a slow exhale through your nose, placing your guitar carefully beside your seat. "no. but this room’s kind of a free zone, as long as you own an instrument, you’re welcome here."

he looked around as he walked closer, nodding in quiet admiration. "you should join. seriously. you’re really good."

you gave him a faint smile, one that didn’t quite reach your eyes. "too many sweats," you replied dully.

his suggestion dug up a bitter memory. your father barging into the clubroom without warning, scolding you in front of the whole class for "wasting time" and humiliating not just you but the other members too. you remembered the way he pointed, the way he talked over your teacher, the heat in your ears as everyone watched. after that day, you never showed up to practice again. but the room still remained open to you.

yushi didn’t push. he just nodded, as if he sensed there was more to your answer than you let on.

"why are you here?" you asked, shifting in your seat.

he reached into his backpack and pulled out something you didn’t expect—a black notebook, slightly bent at the corners.

"i believe this is yours," he said, holding it out.

you stared at it, brows furrowing. "yeah, that’s… how did you—"

"i saw it in the bin earlier, near the rooftop door," he said, half-chuckling. "you’re lucky no one dumped a mountain of trash on it. i figured someone like you wouldn’t throw away something like this unless… well, unless they needed to."

you crossed your arms and tilted your head, still not taking the notebook from his outstretched hand. "i threw that away for a reason."

yushi looked at you for a second, then let out a soft ironic sigh. he pulled out the chair across from you and spun it around to sit facing you, resting his arms on the backrest.

"whatever the reason is," he said, voice gentler now, "don’t let it stop you from doing this. you seem like someone who really loves music. i mean, i saw it on your face when you were playing just now. you weren’t just strumming chords… you were somewhere else."

he paused, then glanced down at the notebook, tapping the edge of it with his fingers.

"and… i’m sorry. i kind of peeked at what’s inside," he admitted, eyes flicking up to yours. "you make good songs. really good."

his words weren’t just flattery, there was something earnest in them. you didn’t feel judged or exposed. just seen.

for some reason, it made you feel lighter. like the tight knot in your chest had loosened. yushi’s smile wasn’t loud or flashy. it was peaceful, filled with something like hope, or maybe belief. and right now, that felt enough to quiet the storm inside you.

you finally brought yourself to lift your hand, taking the notebook gently from his outstretched fingers. "thank you," you murmured, your voice soft as your eyes fell on the cover. it was still dented at the edges, but no longer crumpled. yushi's effort to smooth it out was clear in the way the pages sat flatter than before. you brushed your thumb across it, almost like an absentminded gesture of gratitude.

"don't mention it," he sighed, standing from his seat with a casual stretch. he pushed the chair back into its place with a quiet scrape, then stood in the middle of the room, hands tucked into his pockets as his eyes wandered across the music room. "so," he started. "you're skipping school, aren't you?"

you gave a sneer, rising from your seat and crouching down to pack your guitar back into its gig bag. the zipper rasped as you closed it carefully. "looks like i'm not alone," you said, glancing up at him just as he turned to meet your eyes.

"well, yeah." yushi nodded with a grin. "you're in luck. i skip classes too."

"you're so weird," you laughed, swinging the gig bag over your shoulder before grabbing your school bag and slinging it across the other.

yushi chuckled and walked over to his own bag resting on the table, slinging it on with a shrug. "leaving already?"

you pursed your lips in thought, glancing toward the window where the sun was beginning to lean westward. "i'll just… loiter around the garden until dismissal. i've got enough skips tallied in the guardhouse record already."

yushi let out a light laugh, his smile tilting. "tag me along then," he said, stepping eagerly to your side without waiting for permission.

you rolled your eyes in mock annoyance, but the smirk tugging at your lips betrayed you. "fine."

the two of you strolled through the school garden, the grassy path crunching softly beneath your feet. the air was filled with a gentle rustle of leaves. petals drifted down lazily from the trees above, catching the light like tiny stars in freefall. the neatly trimmed grass shimmered under the sun, and the benches, weathered but clean, lined the pavement beside rows of mini meadows brimming with life—marigolds, baby's breath, sunflowers turning slightly toward the afternoon light.

"the gardening club members are amazing for keeping this place this pretty," you sighed, brushing fallen petals off a bench before sitting down.

yushi paused, hands still in his pockets, and turned slowly in place to take in the scene. "this school's really well kept," he admitted, eyes scanning the trimmed hedges and careful landscaping. "and yet you were planning to litter a notebook around." he laughed, shaking his head as he walked toward the bench.

"at least i threw it properly the second time, you see?" you snorted, scooting over slightly as yushi sat beside you, brushing a few leaves away first.

"throwing something that valuable is still wasting," he said, his gaze resting now on the open space in front of you. the golden field bathed in light, the breeze dancing through the flowers. "why did you throw it?"

you hesitated, looking down at your lap, then at the notebook again. the wind caught the edges of the pages, flipping one open briefly before settling. "it's a secret," you said at last, tilting your head toward him with a faint smile. you wanted to tell him—something about his presence made you feel safe, like a warm pocket of sunlight in a cold place. but the words stuck in your throat. it wasn't that easy. "and i don't wanna talk about it," you added quietly.

yushi didn't press. he just nodded, understanding in the quiet between you. "i see, then…" he shifted in his seat and turned toward you slightly, his eyes glinting with something playful. "sing a song for me."

your brows shot up. you stared at him with an exaggerated look of disbelief. "what?" you snorted. "i don't want to."

"come on!" he leaned in a little, voice light and teasing. "i'll be your first fan when you become a famous musician."

you rolled your eyes with a groan, turning your head away. "i. don't. want."

"damn, fine." he leaned back in mock defeat, hands raised. "for now, i'll just be your pre-debut fan. the first one to convince you to keep writing and singing again."

you smiled faintly, though you tried to hide it. "i never sang to begin with."

"but you wrote," he replied, his tone soft but assured. "and they're all top-notch too."

he stood then, walking a few steps ahead toward the open view. his figure was outlined against the glow of the late sun, casting long shadows across the grass. then he turned back to face you, grinning. "write a song for me. and sing it."

you snorted, shaking your head. "why would i want to do that? what am i supposed to write about—an annoying whimsical transferee?"

he burst into laughter, slightly slipping in a few coughs before covering his mouth with his fist. he paused for a secomnd before speaking. "anything you want," he cleared his throat, arms crossing playfully.

you stared at him for a moment, then looked away again, lost in a thought you didn't voice. the idea of writing something real—about someone real, lingered at the edge of your mind. but then you shrugged it off with a sigh, standing up and swinging both bags back onto your shoulders.

"you're too demanding."

yushi only smiled, trailing behind you as you began walking. "come on," you said over your shoulder. "dismissal's in three minutes. might as well start the walk toward the gate."

yushi's pace slowed as he let you lead the way, watching your back as the light hit your figure, turning your hair into threads of gold dancing in the breeze.

"leaving your friend behind? that's not nice!" he called out, breaking into a jog to catch up with you.

you didn't look back, but your small smile said enough.

you and yushi parted ways at the main road. he waited at the bus stop while you walked your way home alone. if you were being honest, and you hated to admit it, it was only because of yushi that you even bothered heading back today. without him lifting your mood earlier, you probably would've disappeared for days. you already knew what was waiting for you at home: a chorus of sermons from your father and your mother in the background, not caring less even if you and your father were one breath away from killing each other.

and as expected, that's exactly what happened.

the first thing that greeted you when you stepped inside was your father's voice—loud and bassy, echoing from the living room.

"shimizu taeko!"

you rolled your eyes, tugging your shoe off by the doorway, not even glancing in his direction.

"i got a call from your teacher again," he barked, slamming a hand against the wall. he leaned on it, cornering you by the door. "didn't show up to a single class, but you were seen wandering around school?!"

you said nothing. just stood there, unamused.

"do you plan on being a failure forever?! you're humiliating me and your mother!"

you shot him a glare. the first time you did that, you got slapped. but you've been through this too many times now. he only clenched his jaw this time, hands twitching like they wanted to hit something.

you let out a sharp breath, stomping your socked foot against the wooden floor as you brushed past him. your door slammed behind you and you locked it without a second thought.

your father lingered outside for a moment before pounding his fist against your door. the wood shook, but you didn't flinch. you hung your coat, sat down at your desk, and turned on your computer like it was just another night.

"if i get one more call saying you've been seen in that goddamn music room," he shouted through the door, "expect to come home with every one of your useless instruments burned!"

your eyes narrowed. that one ticked off a nerve. the idea of your instruments, the things you poured your soul and own money into being taken from you like that, it made something inside you clench. something ugly and furious.

"so many eyes... might as well install a camera around the school," you muttered under your breath.

seventeen. still under your parents' roof. still helpless. you couldn't wait to turn legal and leave. you didn't care how. you just needed out.

but somewhere along the path of relentless disappointment and pain, there was yushi. a strange little light in the dark. you didn’t ask for him to appear in your life, and yet he did. uninvited, persistent, annoyingly warm. a presence that neither demanded nor offered much, but somehow stayed.

day by day, he somehow made you want to step into school again—even if just for a moment.

he had no friends before you. you rolled your eyes whenever he brought that up, as if saying it out loud made him sound more pitiful than he really was. "thank god you were the one up on the roof that day," he’d say with a lazy smile. "and not someone else. i probably would've just left if it wasn’t you."

you always scoffed at that, brushing it off. "tch. don’t say weird stuff."

"why? it's true," he’d shrug. "you looked like someone who'd get it."

he didn’t know you had stopped writing music. that your notebooks had been collecting dust. that your hands hadn’t strummed a single chord in weeks. but somehow, he nudged the gears back into motion without even trying.

he’d hum random melodies under his breath. off-key, sometimes, but always catchy. you pretended not to hear them at first, but they stuck with you. one day, you found yourself writing a harmony to something he’d hummed. just a fragment. but it was something.

he started bringing you lyrics, scribbled messily on scratch paper. "these are terrible," you said once, laughing.

"i know," he smirked. "but you’d make them sound less terrible."

you never said thank you, but you kept the papers anyway.

he didn’t push you to play. he never even asked about the club. but on some days, he’d casually bring up old artists you mentioned once, or leave a wrapped throat candy on your desk.

"just in case you sing again."

somehow, he made you smile in a way you thought you’d forgotten how. not the forced grin for your classmates or the grimace at your dad’s outbursts, but a real one. there were no grand gestures. just constant reminders that you were still someone who created. that your voice still mattered.

you’d roll your eyes and say he was annoying. you’d scoff when he waited for you outside the clubroom. but when he said, "you’ll write something again soon," you believed him. because a part of you wanted to.

and somewhere along the line, you stopped correcting him when he called you his friend.

────────────♪

it was the weekend. school only opened for students with club activities. you snuck out through your window, then reached back in to grab your gig bag, slinging it over your shoulder.

the old music room wasn't locked. a few of your former clubmates still hosted sessions there. despite being scolded by your father back then just for hanging out with them, they never turned their backs on you. they welcomed you without question.

only one student is in the room when you arrived. the rest were probably grabbing snacks before practice. you bowed politely. she then smiled and bowed back.

"it's been three weekends without you," the girl teased as you made your way to the rear corner of the room, where it was quiet and wide. "we missed you."

"it was getting boring," you said with a smirk, setting your gig bag down.

"we all know you haven't been motivated lately, so don't feed us that," she rolled her eyes and shifted in her seat to face you. "we actually thought you were done. what brought you back? i could use a little motivation myself."

you scoffed softly, shaking your head as you bent to unzip your bag and pull out your chord book. but her question lingered.

what did bring you back?

you tried to find the answer. some solid, conscious reason. you felt like you knew, but it wouldn't come out in words.

and then, like a sunbeam slipping through blinds, riku stepped into the room. dressed in a uniform, only his blazer swapped for a black cotton cardigan. he spotted you and waved.

you blinked up at him. your clubmate perked up. "oh, hey! you're back again," she said, then turned to you. "taeko, this is—"

"yushi," you said, the corner of your lips tugging into a smirk as you stood. "why are you here?"

your clubmate looked mildly surprised. "you know each other? he's always dropping by."

"really?" you frowned slightly, turning back to yushi. "why?"

he shrugged, one hand buried in his pocket. "come on," he said, tilting his head toward the hallway. "they restocked the vendo."

the corridor was quiet. dust motes in the light, devoid of students. you walked beside him in silence for a few seconds before asking, "do you play too?"

"no," he replied simply, glancing at you. "i was just kinda hoping you'd show up on weekends."

you let out a small, awkward laugh. "that's a waste of time. you're really that persistent in trying to get me to play again?"

"i guess so." he nodded.

"i bet you leave immediately every time you see i'm not in the room."

"mhm," yushi nodded again without hesitation. "i do. but hey, at least you came now."

you narrowed your eyes, then shifted your gaze toward the floor as you walked, silent in thought. "do you really have nothing to do on weekends?" you asked, not looking at him. "you just hang around here even though you’re not in any club?"

yushi chuckled. "of course not." he paused, then admitted, "well… yeah, i don’t really do anything on weekends. but i don’t just loiter here all day. i just check if you’re around. since i don’t know where you live."

you smirked a little and gave him a playful nudge on the shoulder. "am i really your only friend?"

he stumbled slightly from the nudge and smiled. "i mean, why?" you continued. "you could, i don’t know, join clubs or make more friends or something."

that’s when you noticed yushi stop smiling. his face changed. not completely blank, but quiet. like he was thinking about something, and didn’t know how to say it.

"...what?" your smirk faded.

he shook his head a little and pointed ahead. "vending machine. what do you want?"

you followed his finger and saw the big red machine by the stairs. "just a cream soda," you said, giving a quick smile. you decided not to push him for an answer again, and he didn’t say anything else either.

he bought two cans and handed one to you. the soda was cold in your hand.

back in the clubroom, other members were back. chatting, fixing their instruments, and getting ready. but when you and yushi walked in, it felt like the rest of the room faded. the noise became background. like the two of you had your own space, just the two of you.

you went to your usual spot and took out your guitar. yushi sat down next to you, cross-legged on the floor. "remember that song i showed you?" you asked while tuning. "the one i wrote a long time ago but never finished?"

he nodded. "the one about being invisible?"

you gave a small nod. "i think i want to try working on it again."

his eyes lit up. "for real?"

"yeah. don’t make a big deal about it."

he didn’t say anything, but the way yushi’s face lit up when you said you were finally repracticing again, when you showed up to the club for the first time in weeks, it made something stir inside you. that brightness in his eyes was real. and strangely enough, you felt fulfilled too.

you had found a friend. a companion who somehow pulled you out from the world your parents, and even you had locked yourself in.

you showed him how to play some basic chords. he messed up a lot, but you helped guide his fingers. your hand brushed against his, and for a second, you froze, but kept going.

"like this," you said quietly.

"here?" he asked, trying again.

you nodded. "not bad. still sounds like a dying duck, but better."

he laughed. "wow. thanks, teacher."

you rolled your eyes. "you get what you pay for."

time passed quickly. you practiced, talked, and laughed. your voice came out a little stronger each time you sang. for the first time in a long while, you felt like you were where you were meant to be. and yushi just being there made it even better.

you looked at him again. the sunlight through the window hit his face in a soft way. his eyes were focused on your guitar, his lips moving a little as he counted the strings under his breath. he looked calm, and peaceful. and just for a moment, you forgot everything else.

"...what?" yushi turned to you, blinking.

you quickly looked away and sat up straighter. "you look kinda ugly," you muttered, fiddling with your guitar’s tuning pegs.

yushi laughed. "was that supposed to be a fun fact?" he nodded toward your hand. "and your guitar’s gonna go out of tune if you keep messing with it like that."

you looked down, realizing you’d been turning the peg without thinking. quickly, you tuned it back to its place.

"i was just… fixing it," you said defensively. "what do you know about guitar anyway?"

yushi smirked. "you literally just taught me how to tune it earlier."

you grinned along with him, giving his shoulder a light shove as the two of you walked into the rest of the morning. the sun was warm, and the breeze felt soft on your skin. for once, the weekend didn’t feel heavy.

when the club gathering ended, you glanced at your phone. 1:03 p.m. it was still early.

"hey," you said, slipping your phone into your pocket. "wanna grab lunch somewhere?"

yushi blinked, then glanced away. his expression shifted slightly, like something just tugged at him from inside. his smile faded into something uncertain.

"i... i don’t think i can," he said, not looking at you.

you noticed how his shoulders tensed. he didn’t say it in a rude way, but something about his tone made you curious. still, you didn’t push. "alright," you said with a small nod.

like always, you went your separate ways once you reached the corner of the road. you watched his figure disappear into the bus stop shed, wondering for the first time where he really goes when he’s not around. home? somewhere?

later that afternoon, you climbed back through your window, careful not to bang your guitar on the frame. you stepped lightly across your room, then dropped down on your bed with a sigh, staring at the ceiling.

you couldn’t stop thinking about him. about how he smiled when you sang. about how he sat beside you in the music room like it was the only place he ever wanted to be. you didn’t know much about his life outside school—what he did, where he went, or even who he lived with. but you wanted to.

a small smile crept onto your lips as you sat up. you walked over to your desk, pulled open the drawer, and grabbed a fresh, small notebook. you flipped it open, clicked your pen, and started jotting down a few lines.

you never thought you’d actually write the song about yushi. but writing about someone who helped you feel like you mattered, someone who clapped for your dreams when you were ready to throw them away didn’t feel like a bad idea at all.

────────────♪

monday.

you came to school early. a few teachers double-taked when they saw you in your seat before the bell rang. one of them even paused at the door, as if they thought you were a ghost.

you slipped out of your classroom before homeroom started, walking past yushi’s class. as you neared the door, you slowed down and tilted your head like a curious meerkat, peeking inside.

just as you were stretching your neck to check if he was there—

thump.

you bumped straight into a wall—or, rather, someone who felt like a wall. a pair of hands grabbed your shoulders, steadying you before you could fall.

"whoa, whoa. watch where you’re going, tardy warrior," came the sarcastic voice.

you looked up and instantly sighed. "shut up, sion."

your old classmate grinned, hands still resting on your shoulders before he let go. "fancy seeing you this early. what happened? guilt finally caught up?"

"god forbid a student be redemptive," you muttered with a smirk, brushing him off. "where’s—"

"yushi?" he cut in knowingly. "not here yet. might be late. you’re, like, thirty minutes early anyway."

you tapped his shoulder and walked off without replying. the early morning air was still crisp as you made your way toward the school gates. you figured you’d wait there, maybe catch him coming in.

but 30 minutes passed. then 40.

still no sign of yushi.

eventually, you gave up and returned to your classroom. you pulled out your phone and opened your messages. saturday’s text, the one you sent when you got home from club classes still hadn’t been read. a small knot of worry formed in your stomach.

still, you typed:

where are you?

you didn’t expect an instant reply, but the silence made the day feel heavier. you leaned your head against the cool glass of the window and stared out at the courtyard three floors down. students crossed from hallway to hallway. birds landed near the trees and flew off again.

everything felt still. the first three subjects dragged. you barely paid attention, just doodled in your notebook or stared into space.

when break time finally came, you didn’t wait. you stood up before the bell finished ringing and made a beeline for the music room, holding your notebook close.

you settled your things on the desk. a notebook, a pen, your green capo, and your guitar. the music room was quiet except for the faint sound of your chair scraping the floor and the breeze coming in from the open window. you picked up your pen and flipped to the page where your unfinished lyrics were waiting.

you started scribbling again. a few lines, crossed out one, hummed a melody softly to yourself.

just then, a small knock echoed from the door. you looked up immediately, heart skipping. and there he was. yushi stood in the doorway, hair slightly messy, school bag slung over one shoulder. he looked tired and pale, like he had been running or maybe just got off a long class. his eyes searched the room before landing on you.

if someone had taken a photo of your face right then, they would've seen a glow. "thought you weren't coming today," you said, trying not to sound too happy as you sat up straighter.

yushi stepped in, dragging a chair in front of you and sitting with the backrest facing you, arms folded on top. "just late," he replied, then raised a brow at you. "and you're early? that's weird. sion told me."

you let out a small laugh. "yeah, well... i wanted to show you something."

he leaned in a little, his expression lifting. curious and expecting something important. you paused. your eyes flicked to your notebook. you were about to tell him about the song.

but instead, you reached for your guitar and lifted it slightly. "it's my new capo," you said quickly, placing it on the fretboard. "got a green one."

yushi chuckled. "that's what you were excited about?"

you shrugged, pretending it wasn't a cover-up. "it's a cool green."

he nodded, still smiling. but you noticed the tiredness in his eyes didn't go away.

────────────♪

after classes ended, you caught up with him again just outside the school gates.

"hey," you said, matching his pace. "want to go to the park?"

he blinked, surprised. "the one near the station?"

you nodded. "just for a bit."

he hesitated, but then agreed. "alright."

the sun was beginning to set as you both walked down the curved pavement of the park. the sky was orange fading into purple, and warm lights from the lampposts blinked on. the air was cooler now, with a soft breeze brushing your face. a few joggers passed by. a kid ran after a soccer ball. the scent of grilled snacks floated from the nearby food stalls.

neither of you said much at first. just walking, side by side, the sound of your footsteps tapping lightly against the path.

eventually, yushi stopped and sat down on a wooden bench under one of the lamps. you followed and sat beside him, placing your bag between your feet.

he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, and let out a quiet cough into his fist.

"you okay?" you asked, turning your head to him.

"yeah," he said after a second, forcing a smile. "just tired."

you reached into your bag without waiting. "want some water?" you pulled out your tumbler and handed it over.

yushi looked at it, then at you, and gave a small smirk. "you always got everything in that bag?"

"maybe."

he took it and drank, not rushing. then he handed it back to you. "thanks."

"you okay now?" you asked again, eyes narrowing just a little as you studied his face.

"better," he nodded.

you leaned back on the bench, staring ahead. the park looked peaceful. there was something warm about it. maybe the streetlights, or yushi's company.

"yushi?" you said, not looking at him.

he let out a hum as a response. you smiled, just a bit. "thank you."

he then glanced at you sideways. "for what?"

"i’ve never been this inspired and motivated to make music," you finally said, voice quiet as you stared at the lit path ahead of you. yushi shifted on the bench, adjusting his posture to face you better. he didn’t say anything yet, just waited patiently, like he knew there was more you were holding in.

you took a deep breath, eyes falling to your hands as you clasped them tightly together. they were damp with sweat. you rubbed your palms slowly against your skirt.

"my parents… they weren’t exactly happy when i told them i wanted to do music," you muttered. "back in first year, when i just got into high school."

you paused. the words were heavy in your chest, but they were finally coming out. "they were angry. i mean really angry. they did everything they could to stop me. i actually joined the music club back then. but…"

you swallowed hard. the memory felt fresh even now. "my dad found out. and he stormed in one day. yelled at me in front of everyone. humiliated me. not just me, everyone else in the club too. i never went back after that."

yushi stayed quiet. but he wasn’t just hearing you, he was listening completely. his gaze didn’t drift. his body was still and focused. there was no judgment in his expression. only understanding in the way he watched you speak.

you slowly turned your head to meet his eyes, and for a second, you were stunned. his eyes were like stars reflecting in dark water. like he saw through you, but didn’t look away.

"i understand," he finally said, giving a small nod as he looked away, resting his back against the bench. "i’m happy you went back to loving music again. even if it’s just because i helped a little."

you shook your head, slowly sitting up straighter, planting your palms on either side of you against the bench for support. the wooden seat creaked slightly. the breeze rustled through your blouse.

"not just because of your help," you spoke. "it’s because of y—"

"thank you."

he cut you off gently, almost like he didn’t want to hear it. like hearing it might make him fall apart.

"thank you… for making me feel like i’m worth something."

you blinked. then turned to face him completely. your heart ached a little at the way he said it. like someone who hadn’t been told that in a long time.

"of course you are," you said, voice trembling just slightly.

he didn’t look at you right away. just kept his eyes ahead. but you saw the way his hands fidgeted in his lap.

you didn’t say anything else. instead, the two of you sat there under the golden streetlight. the night breeze had grown cooler. leaves rustled gently above as the warm park lights cast soft shadows across the pavement. you and yushi sat side by side on the bench, silence lingering between you, but not unkindly.

"i hope things go well for you," yushi broke through the silence, eyes fixed on the path ahead. "with the music, i mean."

you glanced at him, eyebrows slightly raised. "that’s... out of nowhere."

he gave a small shrug, like it didn’t mean much. "i just think you’ve got something special. it’d be a waste if you didn’t go after it."

"thanks," you replied, but your fingers tightened slightly on the edge of the bench. his words were kind, but felt distant, like he was waving from behind a glass wall.

"you’ve become really important to me, you know," he said after a moment. "more than i expected."

you smiled, but it was hesitant. "you’re making it sound like we’re not going to see each other soon."

he let out a breath of a laugh. "that’s not what i meant."

"then what did you mean?" you asked softly.

yushi tilted his head back, looking up at the leaves shifting gently overhead. "just, sometimes you meet people who make things feel less heavy. you did that for me. you made me feel like i was more than just… here."

your chest tightened at that, and you tried to keep your voice light. "you better not disappear or move houses or school somewhere."

he turned to you, puzzled by your sudden shift in tone.

"i mean it," you added, flashing a faint smile. "you wanted me to make you a song, right? if you move, i’m not making it anymore."

that made yushi actually smile, and for a second the heaviness around him seemed to lift. "that’s your way of threatening me now?"

you shrugged. "i’m serious."

"i’m not going anywhere," he said quietly. but he didn’t meet your eyes when he said it. you caught the subtle crack in his voice, the way his fingers twitched like he was holding back something bigger than both of you.

────────────♪

after that evening, you couldn't shake the weird feeling in your stomach. you sat in your room, strumming mindlessly on your guitar, thinking of everything. you worked on the song you were writing, trying to drown out the silence until your head eventually slumped over your desk and you drifted off.

when you woke up, sunlight was already pouring through your window. you wiped your cheek and rushed to get ready, barely brushing your hair as you slung your bag over your shoulder and whipped your way to school.

but when you walked past yushi's classroom again, he wasn’t there. you paused. you thought maybe it was just like yesterday. maybe he was just running late again.

but the hour turned into a day. a day turned into days. days turned into a week. and a week turned into three.

you messaged him, called him, still nothing. you didn’t know where he lived, didn’t know any way to reach him except hoping that he’d just show up again like he always did.

"yushi... you idiot. show up like you always do."

but he never did.

it was during class when your phone buzzed. you glanced down beneath your desk and read the caller id.

father.

you rolled your eyes and clicked your tongue, already disappointed.

you had hoped, just for a second, that maybe it was him. still, you answered, lazily pressing the phone to your ear. "what?"

but your expression dropped the moment you heard the flat and tense tone of his voice.

you stood up, letting out a long sigh as you slung your bag over your shoulder. you walked to the front and mumbled to the teacher, "i need to go. my mom’s in the hospital."

────────────♪

the sterile halls felt colder than usual as you walked through them, nurses gliding in and out of rooms. you kept your head down until you found the number. your mom’s room.

you reached the door and slowly pushed it open.

she lay there, unconscious, pale, and still. a tube fed into her mouth, a breathing mask over her face. machines beeped by her side, blinking with green lights.

your dad sat next to her, hunched over, his hands wrapped tightly around hers. "taeko…" he whispered, his voice cracking as he sniffled.

you froze by the door, staring. this was the first time you'd seen him cry. the first time he looked human.

you quietly leaned against a nearby table, then made your way to the chair across from him. the chair creaked faintly as you sat. neither of you said anything for a moment.

"your mother might get surgery," he finally spoke. "and it can be fatal."

you listened. he didn’t look at you, his eyes were fixed on her. then he added, "do something for her. just once. make her proud. become a good doctor, like she always wanted. like i wanted."

there it was. even now, he couldn’t help himself. you stared down at your hands, your throat getting tight as a laugh threatened to break out—not from humor, but from disbelief.

he kept going, oblivious.

"just imagine how many people like your mom you could save. isn’t that what you want—"

"it’s what you want!"

you cut him off, standing up so fast your chair screeched back across the floor. your voice cracked with emotion.

"look where we are! mom’s fighting for her life and you’re still talking about that stupid dream of yours! why am i the one who has to carry the burden of your regrets?!"

your lips trembled, your shoulders rising and falling. tears streamed down your cheeks uncontrollably.

"you never ask what i want! you don’t even see me as your daughter, just some extension of yourself. just a vessel to finish what you couldn’t!"

your voice cracked again, louder and sharper. "it's—" your throat hitched as you sniffled. "it's not my fault that you had me early, that you never got to finish your damn degree!" you wiped your tears roughly with your sleeve, your nose turning red from crying.

your father stayed silent. his grip on your mother’s hand tightened, his eyes still not meeting yours. for once, he didn’t yell back. he didn’t lecture. he just listened.

the silence made it feel heavier. like you were finally being heard, but it was too late. you reached for your bag, slinging it over your shoulder in a rush. your back turned to him as you walked toward the door.

just before stepping out, you paused.

"you doomed this family," you muttered, barely loud enough, but loud enough for him to hear as you shut the door close.

your footsteps echoed as you jogged through the hall, past nurses and orderlies, ignoring the stares. you rushed up the stairs until you reached the rooftop, pushing the door open and stepping into the open air, instantly blowing off your loose hair.

you ran toward the edge, your shoes skidding slightly against the ground. you gripped the cold metal railing with both hands, leaning forward, your breath shallow and fast.

then—you broke. you sobbed hard, the kind that came from deep in your gut. tears streamed down as your body shook. you clutched the railing tighter, as if it was the only thing keeping you standing. everything came pouring out. the anger, the fear, the guilt, the pain. all of it.

then you felt a hand on your back. warm, steady, and comforting. you froze. the touch was familiar. so familiar it made your heart stop.

you slowly lifted your head, wiping your tears with the back of your sleeve as you turned around. and there he was,

yushi, like an angel standing in front of you. his face lit up by the soft morning sun. the sky behind him was a pale, gentle blue. the breeze ruffled his hair slightly, and his eyes sparkled like stars even under the cloudy morning light.

he looked at you the same way he always did. like everything would be okay.

"yushi?" you sniffled, blinking through the blur of tears as they spilled down your cheeks.

"taeko..." he murmured, his voice trembling with concern and something unspoken. grief, maybe, or guilt. his eyes were filled with worry as he stepped forward, holding your shoulders gently before pulling you into his arms.

you didn’t ask questions. you didn’t scream at him, or demand an explanation yet. your body moved on instinct, collapsing into his chest, eyes shut tight as your sobs grew louder. for the first time in what felt like forever, you felt safe.

his hand ran softly through your hair, his chin resting lightly against your head. he said nothing for a moment, just held you, letting the wind fill the spaces between heartbeats. and his heartbeat—you could feel it through his shirt.

"i’m sorry." he whispered at last, voice cracking as the first tear slid down his cheek.

you heard him. but you didn’t respond. you just cried harder, clutching the fabric of his clothes, clinging to him like a lifeline in the middle of the storm.

time felt irrelevant. maybe minutes passed. maybe longer. but eventually, your crying softened into quiet sniffles, and yushi gently took your hand in his.

"come," he said softly, guiding you to the small bench under the rooftop shed.

it was only then that you really saw him. your eyes widened, panic blooming in your chest. you reached for his arm, your fingers wrapping around it tightly. there was a tube. a medical line trailing from underneath his jacket.

"yushi... why are—"

"why are you crying?" he interrupted, voice low. "why are you here?"

but you ignored his question, your worry overpowering everything else. "you’re hospitalized? and you didn’t tell me? are you okay? are you hurt? sick?"

yushi let out a long, tired sigh. his expression resigned and defeated. "i’m not just sick." he said quietly, looking down at the floor between you.

"what are you-" your voice broke. you couldn't finish the question. you're afraid of any answer that might come. you tried to meet his eyes, but he stepped back, avoiding your gaze.

"i’ll be alright," he said.

"don’t lie to me."

"no more questions," he added, almost pleading.

you stared at him, your chest tightening again. "my mom’s in the hospital too. and now you’re... hiding this from me? what’s going on?" your lips shook. "why didn’t you tell me?"

"i didn’t tell you..." he said, voice barely above a whisper, "because there’s nothing i can do."

he paused.

"i’m dying."

your world stopped.

you wished—hoped—this was just a nightmare. that you'd wake up tomorrow to the sound of your alarm, the morning sun pouring into your room, and yushi waiting at school. healthy. energetic. smiling that ridiculous smile and cheering you on like always.

not this. not the yushi in front of you, pale, weak, and fading.

everything you felt earlier came crashing back down, but now with the weight of knowing he's dying. it was too much, too heavy. your instincts screamed at you to run somewhere, anywhere. maybe back to your room. maybe back to a version of life that made sense.

────────────♪

three weeks passed. spring faded. summer break arrived.

you refused to see him. you couldn't.

it felt like the world had turned its back on you, and you didn't have the strength to face it head-on. your guitar collected dust in the corner. your notebooks lay untouched. you floated through school like a ghost, sitting through hours that dragged with unbearable silence, only to return home and fall into bed like nothing mattered.

but no matter how much you tried to numb yourself, one thing that refused to be buried is that you miss yushi.

one evening, while rummaging through your bag for a paper your teacher had asked for, a small, black forgotten notebook tumbled out. it landed on your bed, its pages fluttering open.

and there, on the half-creased page, was the song you started for yushi. still unfinished, still untitled.

you stared at it for a long moment before picking it up. then, you smiled.

the memory hit like sunlight through a cracked window. clear, warm, and a little bittersweet. that spring afternoon. the petals falling like snow. yushi standing in front of you, hands in his pocket, grinning like a fool.

"write me a song," he said. "and sing it."

that was the day you began to love music again. because of him. because he believed in you when you didn't. because he saw something in you that you couldn't.

you sat down at your desk with the notebook in hand, the mess of your bag forgotten. and then, you began to write the final stanzas.

────────────♪

it was already 11 pm when you left the house, wearing only your hoodie and pajamas. but you didn't care. the last bus was almost leaving. you caught it with a breathless heart and notebook clutched in your hands.

you rehearsed what you wanted to say over and over as the elevator climbed. your steps were quiet down the hallway, eyes scanning every door.

1st door—not him. 3rd—not him. 10th—tokuno yushi. you took a deep breath as you halted.

just as your hand was about to knock, the door creaked open. a maintenance nurse stepped out, holding a handy bin of trash full of paper. she bowed politely and you bowed back. she said nothing. just moved on.

you opened the door and stepped inside. the room was dim, lit only by the warm glow of a lamp and the blue haze of the city lights streaming through the window.

you looked toward the bed, and there he was, sleeping. tubes ran from his nose and chest, blinking monitors beside him. his skin looked thinner, his hair messier. and yet... he was still yushi.

you covered your mouth, choking on a sob. then quietly moved to the chair beside him, sitting down. you placed your hand gently on the bed. "yushi…" you whispered. "i miss you."

silence.

you waited for his eyes to flutter open. for him to greet you like always. but nothing.

"remember during the first weeks of spring?" you continued, voice trembling with warmth and memory. "you were the late transferee. when i first met you, it was on the rooftop… i was about to throw my notebook over the edge."

a faint smile tugged at your lips, as if speaking to someone who could still hear everything.

"you told me not to," you went on, chuckling gently under your breath. "you didn’t even know what i was writing, but you told me it mattered. you told me to keep going even if the world was against me."

you glanced down, brushing your fingertips against his hand.

"it was like you swept all the mess away just to make space for someone like me."

your hand finally reached for his, gently wrapping your fingers around his. his were cold, but you held them anyway, like you were trying to give his warmth back that he gave you.

"at first i thought you were stupid," you whispered, "asking me to write a song for you. but now… you’re worth more than every song i’ll ever write."

you blinked as your chest ached, the lump in your throat pressing harder. smiling faintly, you reached for the notebook on your lap. you stared at it for a second, thumb brushing the worn spine, then carefully placed it on the clean bedside table. no trace of mess around.

"here it is," you said. "read it when you wake up."

your smile trembled. "i won’t sing it yet. you need to get better. when you do, i’ll come back. i’ll bring my guitar and play it just for you."

your voice cracked as your eyes shimmered, glassy from tears you refused to let fall.

"let’s graduate together," you whispered. "okay?"

you gave his hand one last squeeze, then gently let go.

you stood, bowing your head low toward him in a quiet show of love and hope. then you turned, footsteps soft, leaving behind the song, the promise, and a part of your heart in that room.

────────────♪

you walked yourself home that night. the streets were quiet, the wind brushing against your skin. when you got home, you finally let yourself cry. you didn’t hold it in anymore.

the next morning, you put on your uniform like always. you slung your guitar over your back, but this time, you didn’t go straight to school. instead, you headed to the bus stop. there was only one place you wanted to be that day—back at the hospital, hoping yushi would be awake.

as you got off the bus, you passed a flower shop just beside the hospital gate. you picked up a single white lily and held it carefully, your steps a little lighter, a nervous smile twitching at the corner of your lips. hope buzzed in your chest as you made your way down the hallway.

but when you reached the room you swore you entered last night, the nameplate was gone.

you hesitated, then slowly twisted the knob, heart pacing. the room was empty—stripped clean. no signs of anyone ever being there. fresh sheets were folded neatly on the bed. the air was too still.

maybe he just got discharged, you thought. maybe he’s finally home and resting. so you turned around, walked back out of the hospital, the lily still clutched in your hand, and made your way to school instead—though you were already minutes late.

and again, you waited.

you told yourself he was still recovering, that he needed more time. a week passed. then another. the days blurred into months. summer came and went. the first fall of snow melted before your eyes. new year’s lights lit up the streets—and still, no sign of yushi.

during the new year’s party, you decided to visit sion, hoping for something. anything.

"i wish i could help you," he said with a faint shake of his head. "but yushi’s… closed off. we’re not that close either."

that was all he could give you.

time kept moving, even if a part of you stayed behind.

your loneliness didn’t disappear—but it softened, buried somewhere beneath the routine of each passing day. you carried yushi’s warmth in your heart, and it became your light.

you kept writing music, singing at school events, getting back into the club. you met new people, made more friends. and somewhere along the way, your dad started listening. he stopped pushing, stopped forcing. after months of silence, he began to see you for who you were. your mom had her surgery, and she recovered too.

little by little, your life began to find its rhythm.

but you still wished, every single day, that yushi was there to see it. that he was still beside you, laughing, listening, asking for more songs. you held onto that hope.

and so, you waited.

until graduation came.

the hallway echoed with the shuffle of students in their uniforms and gowns. bright smiles, tears, the flash of cameras. you stood among the last years on the first row, the ribbon of your award catching the light. one by one, each of you took the stage, giving your speeches.

the whole ceremony, you hoped you'd see any signs of yushi—but again, you never did.

the ceremony ended, and all students gathered and scattered around the school grounds. many girls had already started asking their crushes for their second buttons—some getting politely rejected, others handed buttons with shy smiles, earning cheers from nearby friends. the air was light, full of confessions, gifts, and snapshots of memories being made. and you stood with your clubmates, smiling for pictures, sharing lighthearted goodbyes and promises to meet again before everyone parts ways for college.

as the goodbyes faded into the distance, and students started to walk off in groups or pairs, you still stood there. still waiting. still hoping yushi would show up.

eventually, you made your way to the school garden.

you found yourself standing before the same bench you and riku sat on last year. same month. same season. same cherry blossoms dancing gently in the wind, falling like snow.

you sat down and stared at the field of blossoming flowers, letting your tears fall as the memories swept in. the ache in your chest returned, deep and wordless. you placed the flowers and gifts you received beside you, then slowly unzipped your gig bag. taking your guitar out, you rested it on your lap.

you gently tapped the wood of the guitar, like a habit formed in his presence, then began strumming the first few chords of the song you wrote—for yushi.

your voice broke the peaceful silence of the garden. soft, heartfelt. the melody of your guitar and your voice blended with the rustling leaves and petals. your eyes closed as you pictured yushi's bright smile beside you, listening quietly, just like he always did. just like he asked you to.

but when you finally finished your song and opened your eyes, there was no smile beside you. no sign of the boy you grew to love.

you sighed quietly, looking down, then set your guitar beside the bench. that's when you heard it—the rustling of grass behind you. someone was there.

eyes bright with sudden hope, you stood up immediately, turning around with your hair flying from the motion. but standing there was a girl, wearing a pink scarf and a soft dress.

she smiled, then glanced at your nameplate stitched on your uniform. "shimizu taeko?" she asked.

the light in your face dimmed as you nodded. "yes?"

"i heard you sing. yushi was absolutely right about you," she said, smiling as she walked closer. she stood right in front of you.

"yushi?" your eyebrows lifted. a spark of hope flickered again. "you know him?"

she nodded. "i'm tokuno hana."

by her name, you immediately assumed that she's his sister. you swallowed, before asking hesitantly. "where's... yushi?"

hana looked down. her silence answered for her. she reached into her bag, pulling out something you instantly recognized—your notebook. the one you left for him that night in the hospital.

"here." she held it out gently. "this might belong to you."

you didn't say anything. you just took it from her hand, staring at the cover. your lips started to tremble in realization that made you dizzy.

your knees gave out as you collapsed to the ground, curling your arms around your legs, face hidden between your sleeves as tears spilled freely.

hana knelt beside you, her hand gently patting your arm. "thank you for... making my brother happy," she said softly. "and, for being there for him when we couldn't. i'm sorry."

then, slowly, she stood and walked away, leaving you there—alone with your grief.

you sat in silence for minutes, holding the notebook tightly to your chest, until finally, you stood. the garden still whispered in the wind, blossoms still falling.

you turned to face the field, letting the breeze brush your face.

"thank you, yushi," you mumbled to the wind, eyes shutting gently. and in that darkness behind your eyelids—you saw his smile.

you smiled back, despite the tears. the world didn't end.

"i love you."

you whispered one last time before turning back. you swung your guitar over your shoulder, picked up your things, and gently placed the notebook down flat on the bench.

then, you began walking home.

all that was left in this school were your memories of yushi—memories you'll never return to, but ones that will never leave you.

the bench sat quietly beneath the cherry blossoms, petals gently raining down over it. a breeze rolled by, flipping open the notebook's cover, its pages fluttering until it stopped right on the one that held the song you wrote for him.

there, tucked between the pages—is yushi's second button. you never saw it.

YUSHI

"give this to her, please," i muttered, eyes downcast as i fidgeted with the button of my uniform i cut. "it was never my intention to lie to her, hana. i failed her." my voice cracked as tears fell freely, my hands trembling as i sat by my hospital bed. my sister sat beside me, holding back her own tears.

"it's not your fault," she said softly. "get some rest. i'm sure she'll pay you a visit soon."

"it's better this way," i whispered. "i can't let her remember me, only to be burdened forever by my death."

the remaining weeks of my life, i spent them grieving—grieving what could’ve been, and hating how everything turned out.

but eventually, i found peace in the little things. i began to spend those fleeting days remembering the light she gave me—the comfort, the hope. she made it all bearable as i grew weaker each day.

now, all i can do is stare out the large window by my hospital room as the sun sinks below the horizon. my breathing has grown shallow; i can feel the machine breathing for me, my lungs slowly giving out.

i reached for the pen on my bedside table, surrounded by scattered, messy papers. i picked up a clean sheet and placed it gently on my lap.

then, with all the strength i had left, i began to write.

when i finished, i folded the letter carefully and placed it atop the stack of papers beside my bed.

────────────♪

taeko,

i'm sorry i lied to you.

from the very beginning, i never intended to become close to you. i didn't want to drag anyone into my life knowing that my time's limited, especially not someone like you. but each day i spent with you, it was like you were giving my life a purpose, just as i was trying to give yours a little hope.

and that's what led me to lie.

i didn't want you to know i was dying. i didn't want our time to be filled with pity or fear. but now, i regret it. i should've told you. i should've lived every moment with you honestly, without hiding.

have you written the song for me? will you sing it someday? i may never know. but either way—thank you. thank you for being in my life. thank you for letting me be a part of yours, even if just as a friend even for a few months.

when i thought my world was ending, i met you on that rooftop. i thought i was the one giving you hope, but it turns out, you were the one who saved me. you made me feel like my world didn't have to end just yet, and until now, it still hasn't ended. it will never.

i won't be able to say this with my voice anymore, but i hope this letter reaches you.

i love you, taeko. so much.

────────────♪

after that, i closed my eyes. and within the next few hours, i could no longer wake up. the last thing i felt in my sleep was my heart, and her warm hand gently letting go of mine.

[stllwiyuu]

⎯⎯ ⠀ ⠀step by step, 슬퍼지려 하기 전엔, 내게 다시 돌아와.

[stllwiyuu]

⎯⎯ ⠀ ˚₊‧꒰ა❤︎໒꒱ ‧₊ it’s like a magic, so loveholic

[stllwiyuu]

3 minutes —

pairing : sunshine!jaehee x gn!reader

summary : after accepting a stupid bet from sion, a twenty-eight day countdown began where you have to confess to your long time crush, kim jaehee, or else you don’t talk to him ever again.

warnings : fluff, crack, lots of overthinking and second-hand embarassment, mutual yearning (i think?), very cute !!, featuring sion :>

a/n : i made this in april… hehe enjoy !!

queueing : 3 minutes - nct wish, for: you - kali uchis, wishful thinking - grentperez, trouble - laufey, all i can say - kali uchis

00:00 — our time is running out, not long to go

you’re two days away from a full blown emotional crisis, and sion is making it worse.

he's lying on your bed, legs crossed in the air like he owns the place, scrolling through his phone while your heart slowly melts into the floor. across the room, your whiteboard sits smugly above your desk, mocking you with thick black marker.

“CONFESS TO HIM BEFORE THE 30TH - or never speak of it again !!”

"so," sion says, popping a chip into his mouth. "do you want me to play sad violin music now, or should i wait until you actually chicken out?"

you groan, face planting into your pillow. “i’m not chickening out.”

"suureeee.”

he's not wrong. the bet felt easy four weeks ago. just something dumb to say when you were tired and frustrated and in denial about liking jaehee since the beginning of time. it wasn’t supposed to be real.

but now it’s the 28th. you’re running out of time.

and because you're stupid, you're gonna stick to your word and drop the entire idea of liking him if you don't muster up the courage to confess soon. 'it's a waste of time if it continues any longer, right?'

"c'mon y/n, do it sooner or later." sion cuts off your rambling thoughts. he probably knew that you were overthinking again.

"okay but what if-"

"what if this, what if that. keep making up excuses, time won't stop for you." he says, rolling his eyes at how repetitive you are with each excuse you make. "just do it, if he likes you, you get together. if he doesn't, life goes on"

ugh, sion makes it sound sooo easy. you just want it to be perfect, something you won't look back and start visibly cringing.

“why did i take this stupid bet” you say, burying your face into your pillow once again.

“because you’re sad and delusional.” sion answers almost immediately, like his answer is default. he pops another chip in his mouth. “also because i basically dared you to, and you’re, tragically, a people pleaser.”

your groans from the couch grow in sound causing sion to chuckle.

it was all supposed to be some stupid joke. seeing jaehee open a door for a random sophomore and the signature smile he gives was just so boyfriend coded.

‘he’s nice to everyone’ you repeat to yourself but you can’t stop your heart from beating a little faster when he’s around or your face from heating up when he smiles at you.

especially not since the rainy day after exams

▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။|||| |

you’re darting across campus, arms wrapped around your textbooks like a shield, and rain starts to pour down. now you’re left crouched under a lone tree, drenched and muttering to yourself.

then jaehee appears, umbrella in hand, offering the perfect half‑circle of coverage.

“you look like you’re auditioning for a depressed main character,” he jokes, voice calm as raindrops drip onto his hair. “mind if i…?”

he tilts his umbrella just enough so you can slip underneath. you mumble “thank you,” but he waves it off.

“it’s nothing. i do this for anyone who’s caught in the rain.”

and you believe him because every time you see him, he’s doing exactly that. opening doors, carrying groceries, dropping off lost phones. yet in that moment, shoulder to shoulder and both soaked at the hem, it feels undeniably, achingly… personal.

▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။|||| |

you peel the pillow off your face and sigh.

“i’m going to throw up,” you mutter into the ceiling.

“just confess,” sion says. “three minutes. that’s all you need. you’ve liked him for forever. what’s the worst that happens?”

you don’t answer. sion sets a three minute timer and slams his phone on the desk.

“you’ve got three minutes to tell me how you would confess”

you freeze. no rehearsed speech. no mental preparation. everything was gone except embarrassment and panic.

0:57 — ballads, classic music, they sure are great, not my style though

random drafts clutter your desk. on a normal day it would be covered with neatly color-coded notes, but today, it’s a messy group of small notes and crafts, things you wanted to give to jaehee. a letter of random yaps stand out from the rest.

“i like the way you say my name”

“your hands are really nice”

“do you wanna get ramen sometime..? or never speak to me again. either works”

you stare at the page and seriously consider setting it on fire. only thing stopping you is the fire alarm going off… and sion

“stupid sion, stupid ideas…” you mumble quietly, crumpling the draft and throwing it at the garbage where it misses.

to your surprise, sion starts humming behind you before walking over, grabbing the draft, and tossing it back to you. he definitely heard you slandering him behind his back.

“like you have better ideas. remember when you spent three days trying to find out and memorize his schedule to try and ‘bump into him’ coincidentally?” he spits out while rolling his eyes like you’re a lost cause.

you throw the pen that you were using at him, only for it to hit his leg with no reaction.

“you folded without him even seeing you and you walked past him. god, it was so embarrassing, i wish i recorded it.” sion continues.

“okay so what is this slander i’m recieving.”

“i’m just saying, you’re gonna have to try harder” he says as he goes to his own room.

when he finally walks off and stops bothering you, you cover you face with your hands, trying to come up with ideas.

dramatic scene? cute promposal? letter in his locker?

you give up, but nothing feels worse than how jaehee keeps acting normal.

he likes your stories, replying to them with things like, “LMFAO ur so unserious.” he even waved to you this morning. the sleepy eyed, hoodie-draped, and unbothered jaehee. doing literally anything like your heart isn’t currently on life support.

you wish he’d do something, anything, to give you a reason to run or stay. instead, he keeps being, well… jaehee. kind, warm, and impossibly close.

[queue a confession plan montage]

you draft text messages before deleting them. you consider fake crying in front of him to get his attention. you rehearse dramatic lines in the mirror like, “if i don’t say this now, i never will”

sion just watching all of this happen in horror. “you need a nap and a divine intervention.”

and just like that, time passes by a little too fast and the clock hit’s midnight.

one day left

sion sighs, “enough. it’s not about the how. just do it. three minutes of courage, remember?” he says, reassuring you with each hand on your shoulder. “doesn’t matter what you say. it matters that you say it.”

you’re almost out of time and somehow you’re still not ready enough to tell the boy who’s always been there that you’ve had feelings for him for a while now. it doesn’t help that you guys can have a normal conversation and he stands there, completely unaware that you’re counting down the minutes like a ticking time bomb, like the world was going to explode.

1:57 — skip the intro, need no outro

you wake up after staying up till two in the morning. it’s not like it’s easy to sleep after finding out you have less than 24 hours to confess.

the sound of the alam is screaming at you. not ringing, not chiming, screaming.

sometime last week sion changed you alarm’s name to “WAKE UP OR DIE” which is quite fitting actually since you’re halfway to cardiac arrest when you see the time.

class started 15 minutes ago.

the last class with jaehee

your last chance.

you bolt upright, take a deep breath of regret, and trip over your own feet before trying to get out of bed. your voice croaks on impact.

“ow- what the… i sound like a dying goat.”

of course you get a sudden sore throat that makes your voice extra raspy, not the best for confessions.

and just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse, you go to your bathroom for a mirror check. disaster confirmed.

your hair looks like you just lost a wrestling match with a random squirrel and your hoodie is wrinkled beyond saving. gotta love that bed hair and sleeping with your hoodie.

“i can’t confess like this,” you mutter, voice still raspy, a little better though after you chug a glass of water. you yank your hoodie’s hood up in shame.

but you have two choices.

1. hide in your room forever and never speak to kim jaehee ever again.

2. show up to class, late, looking like someone’s worst picture day photo and pray he still looks at you the same.

of course, you choose humiliation.

getting there was… an experience. your bag was bouncing like crazy, slung on your shoulder. you can’t count how many times it almost fell off of it.

but by some miracle, you arrive outside the lecture hall just as class ends. time is actually running out and it’s all hitting you now.

your heart is pounding. you’re seconds from turning around and admitting defeat when-

you see him

jaehee. leaning against the wall in the hallway. backpack slung over one shoulder, scrolling through his phone, waiting for no one

or maybe you.

your breath catches. not because he sees you, but because he doesn’t. not right away at least

suddenly, your care about the way you look disappears. because if you turn around you, you’ll regret it forever.

you step forward, voice gone, thoughts racing, hands shaking.

jaehee looks up. his eyes catch on you instantly. and he smiles. that same smile that is so precious that it makes you want to frame it.

“yo, you look like you just fought a wind tunnel. you okay?”

you open your mouth. nothing comes out. not even a word. just-

“i—uh—hh—hi” you manage to get out.

your voice breaks. like, full on voice crack catastrophe. jaehee blinks then laughs like nothings wrong.

“you sick or something?”

you shake your head, clutching your chest like it’ll steady your heart. “just tired”

he tilts his head, feeling like he’s watching you a little longer than necessary. “you sure?”

you nod. and somehow that gives you the nerves to say, “can we talk? after school?”

his expression shifts. just slightly. curious. gentle “yeah. of course”

and that’s it. you don’t run. you don’t faint. you just walk away, hoodie clutched tight and stomach flipping.

it wasn’t the best confession, but it was something.

2:47 — turn the beat up, volume up, tune out the noise and now listen here.

you don’t see the text.

you’re halfway through spiraling in your locker mirror, trying to flatten your hair with your sleeve and mouth a pep talk to your reflection. when jaehee’s message comes in.

[jaehee: where should we meet?]

[jaehee: or i can just wait outside?]

you don’t check your phone, you don’t check anything. but you begin to make your way to the same hallway you encountered him earlier.

you’re too deep in your head. rehearsing lines you won’t remember. praying your heart doesn’t fall out of your chest and onto the hallway floor.

and then you turn a corner.

so does he.

he’s looking at his phone. you’re completely zoned out.

bam.

it’s not a full-on crash, but it’s enough to knock you off balance, hands flailing, a soft “ah !” slipping out, heart immediately doing parkour in your chest.

“oh—sorry—”

you look up.

jaehee. his hoodie. his smile. his dumb, perfect face.

“whoa, that’s my bad,” he says, already steadying you by the arm. “you okay?”

your mouth opens. and before you can stop yourself, it all comes out, “i like you.”

you don’t even realize you’ve said it until it’s out in the air. soft, sudden, too fast. like slipping on a step you thought was solid.

jaehee freezes.

you swear you see his eyebrows twitch, just slightly, and his grip on your arm loosens in slow motion. he blinks. then stares. not confused, not shocked. just… processing.

and your body goes cold.

“i—” your voice shakes. “i didn’t mean to say it like that. or here. or now. it wasn’t supposed to be in a hallway after i almost headbutted you—”

he doesn’t say anything.

you keep going. rambling like your brain is sprinting to outrun your shame.

“i had this whole plan. i mean, kind of. okay not really. i panicked, like, a lot. there was going to be a letter. then a conversation. now it’s just—word vomit.”

you force a laugh. it dies halfway out of your mouth.

“i like you. surprise, i guess. i swear i’m not usually this much of a mess.”

you glance up. he’s still looking at you. and then, finally.

he smiles.

not a huge one. not a smirk. just this soft, lopsided curve that starts in his eyes before it hits his lips. like the truth of what you said has landed and he’s letting it settle.

“do you want to try again,” he says quietly, “but slower this time?”

you stare. “what?”

he shrugs, like it’s the most normal thing in the world. “i want to hear you say it again. but, y’know… like you mean it.”

“i do mean it,” you say, breath catching.

“then say it. slower. this time I’ll listen with both ears.”

he’s teasing, just a little. but his voice is so calm. so real. like he’s trying to make it easier for you to breathe. so you do. you inhale, exhale, and look him in the eyes.

“i like you,” you say again. “you’re kind. and funny. and too nice sometimes. and i’ve been trying to ignore it, but every time you smile or laugh or say my name like it’s not a big deal, i just—” you pause. “i like you. a lot.”

he watches you. his smile softens. and this time, he steps closer.

“i was hoping that’s what you were going to say,” he murmurs. “i’ve kind of been waiting.”

your breath hitches. “you have?”

he laughs. quiet, sweet, like the sound of a secret being kept safe. “you think i just replied to all those 2 a.m. memes and came to study sessions for fun?”

your mouth gapes. “i thought you were just… being nice!”

“i am nice,” he grins, “but not that nice.”

you both laugh. and it’s quiet again, but not the heavy kind. this silence feels full. like the space right before a song drops.

like waiting for the best chorus to begin.

3:00 — a whole three minute song is a weird flex

you’re not sure how long you walk.

you don’t even remember where you were going anymore. the hallway doesn’t matter. the clock doesn’t matter. it’s just the two of you, side by side, your hand almost brushing his, your heart still caught somewhere between your ribs and the ceiling.

jaehee is smiling, not the ‘too polite’ kind, not the ‘just being friendly’ kind, it’s small and real, like he’s holding this moment with both hands.

“you’re really quiet,” he says eventually, glancing over at you.

you blink like you just woke up from a dream. “am i?”

“you haven’t said a full sentence in like… five minutes.”

you groan softly and rub your hands over your face. “sorry. i think my brain exploded.”

he laughs. “it’s okay. i kinda liked the word vomit version too.”

you glare at him playfully. “can you not call my deepest emotional breakthrough vomit? only i can call it that.”

“fine,” he teases. “emotional confetti. better?”

you roll your eyes, but the situation makes your cheeks burn. because this is real. this is really happening. you said it. he heard it. he smiled.

but your chest still feels tight. your thoughts still loop like a broken record. you mumble, mostly to yourself, “i don’t know what i’m supposed to do now…”

“what do you mean?”

you shrug, eyes fixed on your shoes. “i’ve never actually… gotten here. past the crush part. past the chaos. this is the part where i usually, i don’t know, daydream?”

you laugh, but it’s fragile. your voice trembles on the edges. “what if i mess it up? or get weird? or scare you off?”

jaehee stops walking. you feel his hand barely graze yours again.

then, he laces your pinky with his. just that. not a full handhold. not a bold move. just a promise in miniature.

“then we take it slow,” he says. “we figure it out. together.”

you stare at your tangled pinkies. your voice is a whisper. “you really like me?”

“is that a serious question after like three confessions and a hallway collision?”

you grin. and it finally sinks in.

he likes you.

you like him.

and somehow… that’s enough.

▶︎ •၊၊||၊|။|||| |

somewhere across campus, sion is binging some show in your shared dorm room, phone in hand, waiting for your dramatic all-caps text. instead, he gets this,

[you: i did it.]

[you: i think he likes me.]

[you: like. actually.]

ten seconds later:

[sion: SHUT. UP.]

[sion: YOU ACTUALLY SAID IT?!]

[sion: OMG YOU’RE A LEGEND I’M GOING TO FRAME THIS]

[sion: did you cry. be honest.]

[sion: IS HE HOLDING YOUR HAND.]

you smile down at the screen.

jaehee peeks over your shoulder. “who’s that?”

“sion. he’s been emotionally invested in this since day one.”

“should i say hi?”

“if you do, he might rub it in my face that he was right and that you did like me.”

jaehee grins. “we’ll save that for the next confession, then.”

and you just… laugh. because maybe love doesn’t need fireworks or speeches.

maybe all it needs is a little chaos, a little courage, and someone who smiles when you stumble.

three minutes is enough time after all.

ty for reading :>

perm taglist : @s0shroe @minoouz @the0p @mon2sunjinsuver @solkver @lov3lyaaru @tanghuyuj

nct wish taglist : @solkver @j4d

[stllwiyuu]

⎯⎯ ⠀ ♡₊ ⊹💭 l-o-v-e is you!

[stllwiyuu]

you belong with me!

sypnosis: it’s a common cliché — the new girl falls in love with the school’s handsome jock. there’s just oneee little problem; he’s dating the captain of the cheerleading squad! don’t worry though, they’ll end up together somehow.

or in which… you’re the captain of the cheerleading team and your classmate confesses her profound love to your popular jock boyfriend. yikes!

pairing: tokuno yushi x reader (she/her pronouns) ft. sion, aeri, ningning, one (1) mention of tws hanjin LOL

genre: crack, small angst, fluff, soccer player!yushi, cheerleader!reader, uni!au, bulletpoint fic

warnings: baby and sweetheart as pet names, mentions of food (?), cringy

wc: 1.7k

— august 5, 8:00 am

you and yushi are literally the power couple of the campus

the handsome yet quiet jock and the pretty, outgoing cheerleader? a match made in heaven if i've ever seen one

the two of you met in science class when paired for a project back in freshman year

slowly you got close with him and became best friends, an unlikely pairing to some eyes, but it worked perfectly for you two

then in junior year yushi confessed to you

it wasn't anything grand or over-the-top, it was just... a confession

a simple "i've developed feelings for you, and if you feel the same i'd love to be yours just as you'd be mine."

i mean, who could say no to that?

"i feel the same way, ushi."

and now here you two are, starting your final year of university stronger than ever

your couple dynamic started getting more traction when yushi got accepted into the soccer team and you into the cheerleading squad

people started LOVING your little moments together

you and your public affection for yushi, always hugging him or giving him good luck kisses for soccer games

him and his quieter acts of love, holding a matcha latte for you in his hand as he waits outside your class, remembering the little things you tell him

people ATE IT UPPPPP (and so would i)

but since yushi isn’t one for big gestures, you resorted to smaller acts like giving him snacks for soccer practice or making him lunch

he’s more affectionate in private and you always respected that

but things started changing when the new girl transferred

uchinaga aeri

"what a fancy name" you first thought

ningning, your best friend and roommate, introduced you to her

she started getting popular in a way

how could she not? she's incredibly pretty!

very reserved though, only started talking to people in the cheer squad when you invited her to tryouts

she was surprisingly very good! got in right away

you introduced her to yushi because you thought they'd get along since he can speak japanese to her

and you were right! the two immediately clicked

you could tell aeri was very comfortable with yushi because she was much more talkative

they were getting close but you didn't mind! you trusted yushi and you had no reason to be worried

...right?

— october 30

2 months go by and aeri has officially joined your little group

it's you, yushi, ningning, and aeri

things are going well! aeri's coming out of her shell and embracing her true self thanks to ning and yushi

she changed a lot from when she first came

aeri dyed her hair a baby pink, started wearing more statement clothes, etc.

very cute look on her! others think so as well since guys started asking her out

and it's nice for yushi too because he has a friend to talk to in his mother tongue

everything is working out!

things are taking a turn for the better

little do you know

— november 11, 4:31 pm

one day, you head to the soccer field to give yushi one of his favorite potato chip snacks

you can't seem to spot him though

"looking for mr. tokuno?" a voice says

you turn around

oh, sion! (pun intended)

"yeah, i just wanted to give him some food"

"i saw him go in locker rooms, try check there"

you thank sion and start heading there

u enter the locker rooms and slowly peek your head through the doorway just so you don't walk into someone changing LOL

and there you see it

yushi and aeri talking on one of the benches

she's saying something in japanese that you obviously can't understand

your bf looks un-entertained

"you shouldn't be here. not even y/n comes back here." he says sternly

aeri scoffs

"so what?"

excuse me????? your brows furrow and a frown grows on your face

"so that means you should leave." yushi's voice firms

aeri giggles and playfully shoves him, "okay okay, i'll go ushi-kun. let's just talk later!"

when did she start calling yushi by the nickname you had for him?

your stomach drops

why do you feel so nauseous?

— november 17, 2:15 pm

a couple days go by and you're still thinking about what you saw in the locker room

maybe you're just overthinking things

if anything you should be glad that aeri is being all friendly!

you're currently walking up to the rooftops of one of the buildings

it's usually where you and yushi go to eat lunch

suddenly, you see ning and sion running towards you like madmen

what the hell is going ON???

"Y/N, Y/N! baby i’m so sorry-“ ningning starts, tears welling up in her eyes

“honey what’s going on?” you ask as she catches her breath

sion finishes the sentence for her

“aeri’s asking yushi out on a date”

you freeze

what?

sion rubs ning on the back soothingly

“it’s okay, we all know yushi loves her, we just wanted to let you know y/nnie”

“this is all my fault! i should’ve never introduced aeri to you y/n i’m so sorr-“

you pull ningning in for a hug

she gets emotional easily lol

“we’ll take you there if you want” sion suggests

you agree

GET YOUR MAN!!!

— november 17, 2:22 pm

the three of you head over to the soccer field

immediately you see it

aeri is standing in front of yushi near the water jug

she’s talking with what seems like a newfound confidence in herself

the rest of the soccer team is on the benches just watching

what a bunch of chismosos, am i right? (sion takes a seat next to ryo and you sit next to him)

it’s like aeri has no shame in talking to YOUR boyfriend infront of his whole team!

but you also have no shame eavesdropping on their conversation

touché

you can hear aeri’s voice clear as day

“ushi-kun, i just wanted to say that i’ve developed feelings for you. you showed me that change is an opportunity for new beginnings, that being myself isn’t something i should be afraid of, and that loving somebody doesn’t have to be grand or extraordinary, that love finds its way into everyday things and mundane matters. thank you for allowing me to be myself. please let me take care of you properly.”

oh

well that wasn’t what you expected at all

you start to think that her confession was even better than yours

it makes you think back to when you first met aeri

she was so quiet, and now she’s much more comfortable with herself

and it’s all thanks to yushi

maybe she makes him feel the same

you can practically feel your body tensing up awaiting yushi’s response

he stares at her blankly and softly says something in japanese

it's short and sweet

yushi then walks away

the sinking feeling in your stomach tells you that it’s better not to know what he said.

he may be your boyfriend, but why does it feel like you're fighting for something that should already be yours?

— january 8, 11:30 am

it’s been less than 2 months since aeri confessed to yushi

you haven’t brought it up since

maybe it's petty or immature but can you really be blamed?

perhaps isn't even your business to ask

yushi notices you've been distant

of course he does

he just needs to find the right time to talk to you about it

— january 8, 10:56 pm

so this was definitely not the right time

he's practically sprinting to you and ning's shared dorm rn

not only is he out of breath but it’s also pouring rain

horrible timing, he thinks

he arrives at your dorm and knocks on your door frantically

you on the other hand are making dinner

ning's out on a date with some guy named hanjin? you forgot tbh

someone starts pounding on your door like crazy

"DAMN GIRL HOLD ON i'm getting to it!" you shout, thinking it was ningning oops

but you open the door to your very much distressed boyfriend

he's wearing his signature denim jacket with a white tee inside and sweats

and even though he’s basically drenched in rainwater the droplets slide down his cheeks just right and they lay on drop of his eyelashes so beautifully

wow

he looks so pretty ugh no wonder why aeri likes h-

"baby, i'm freezing here."

his voice snaps you out of your trance

oh RIGHT

you apologize and let him in right away, running to the bathroom and giving him a towel to dry his hair

he sits on your couch and you do the same, taking up the space next to him

"why are you here so damn late?” you scold him “it’s pouring out there too! what were you thinking?”

“i know you were there when aeri said she liked me. i know you heard everything. i know you think that i accepted her confession.”

goddamn he NAILED it

you can barely look him in the eyes as you try to respond

“i—“ “y/n.” you look up at yushi, who’s already staring at you very intensely

“listen to me sweetheart, okay?”

you nod (it’s all you can manage to do)

“i do not love her. i belong to you just as you belong to me. i only see aeri as an acquaintance, nothing more. you make me feel safe, comfortable, and loved. you turn my rainy days around and make the sunny ones even brighter. please never think that you will be replaced. the love you’ve shown me is of a price that nothing can buy. i love you, y/n.”

oh

well that wasn’t what you expected at all pt.2

wait, are you crying?

oh yeah we’re crying

hereee we go with the waterworks

you can’t even get a word out because you’re practicing sobbing at thing point but yushi just hugs you tightly and rubs the back of your neck as his other hand is rubbing small circles into your waist

“how do you always know what to say” you ask through sobs

he chuckles

“i can read you like a book”

yushi holds you for the rest of the night

— february 27, 8:20pm

back and better than eva baby!!!

you and yushi are doing much better now, if not better than the beginning of the school year

aeri has a group of new friends now, and both you and yushi say hi to her occasionally, but things have changed

and that’s okay!

yushi’s game against the rival uni just finished

close match but yushi’s team stay winning!!!

there was supposed to be a victory celebration at a nearby restaurant but he wanted to go to his dorm so you agreed

he must be tired

as you enter his dorm you take notice of how everything seems so… sentimental?

candles are lit, warm lighting is surrounding the living room, soft music is playing

what is going ON

you step forward a little bit and there it is

all your favorite snacks set up nicely in a basket, your favorite character's plushie sitting on the couch, a HUGE ass bouquet of flowers, and balloons that spell out 'happy anniversary'

you laugh out loud

he's really outdone himself

yushi may not be someone that loves in public, but when he does, he does it right

— bonus

after aeri confesses, yushi says something in japanese so you can't understand

what was it, you may ask?

"my heart belongs to someone else."

—

author's note: AAAAAAA my first actual fic?? i don't know how i feel i'm not good with words so it's probably booty

please make sure to like or reblog if you enjoyed it and pls be nice or i'll cry :') have an amazing night!

[stllwiyuu]

⎯⎯ ⠀ ⋆.˚⟡₊ ⊹ υ˶◕ ﻌ ◕˶υ

[stllwiyuu]

my favorite loser ⋆˙⟡

#%! oneshot (1,837 words) #%! tokuno yushi x gn!reader

requested by ༘⋆ anonymous

synopsis .ᐟ what's your loser classmate doing with the ball on the field? huh. maybe being forced to watch your brother's game wasn't such a terrible idea after all.

content warnings .ᐟ minor profanity, strangers to lovers, massive loser yushi, silly mean reader, consensual (?) bullying, is it really strangers to lovers if one person has been crushing for years?

✄┈┈┈┈ january 01, 2025 – 9:43 am.

A whistle sound blares through the entire field, effectively waking you up from where you're seated at the bleachers. You’ve been idle there for nearly an hour and a half, irritation bubbling from your core. You could have had enough time to shower and change out of your pajamas if it weren't for your brother rushing you. He’s barely even late!

How did you end up at one of your brother’s games, you ask? Here's what happened exactly..

“y/n! get your ass ready, let's go!”

you groan loud enough for him to hear, you didn't even want to go to his game! and now you're being rushed, how annoying.

“I’m coming!” you yell back when, in fact, you were not coming down anytime soon. If he wants you to watch his game, he has to work for it.

thinking that your brother has left from the stillness of noise in the living room, it leaves you absolutely shocked out of your wits when he comes bursting through your bedroom door.

he charges at you and lifts you over your shoulder like a sack of potatoes, causing you to erupt in giggles. now you know to never underestimate a football player's strength!

“you need to get out the house y/n” he sing-songs, the grip on your legs never faltering no matter how much you thrash and wriggle out of his hold “I will go out! just not to watch you suck at football!”

your brother snickers, already out the door and nearing the car, “you’d be surprised how wrong you are, really” just as the car door flies open, he throws you inside and shuts it before walking to the drivers side “I’m not captain for nothing”

you sit up with a sigh, you already know he won't shut up about how much of an amazing player he is. to which– you agree, truthfully. you’d rather not let him know, though.

And that's your morning flashback. Thinking about it genuinely makes your head hurt, anger already simmering. Stay calm, positive thoughts.

Just as you finish calming yourself down, loud cheers erupt and soon enough, you spot your brother smugly walking to the center of the field, his teammates trailing behind just as smug as him. Proud smiles, puffed out chests– you could tell this is their thing, they're in their element.

In all realness, football does interest you. With the way your brother geeks out about it since you two were young, you can't help gaining the same fascination. So, being seated at the players area bleachers truly has you on your toes, making sure to fight every urge to keep your smile concealed.

Just before another round of yells explodes for the opposing team, your brother’s team jog to where you're seated, situating their things on a bleacher each, the coach giving you a kind smile as your brother high fives you. Deep down, you're just as pumped as him, and he knows that too.

You throw your brother an encouraging smile, and then look at the rest of his teammates to do the same. Until– what? Yushi? What’s that nerd doing here!

You two share the same shell-shocked expression, before yours turns into something inevitably evil. What a sight to see! Your favourite loser playing such an excruciating sport. Yushi pales, eyes shaking and mouth agape. No way you’re watching his game!

He's so, absolutely, cooked. He can’t possibly embarrass himself in front of you! Much to his luck, your brother smacks him on the back, snapping out of his fright, “yushi! You’re a starter, okay? Okay!” Really, he’ll just kill himself. But he guesses this way better than being benched and getting an earful from you.

He's not really sure what expression he’s making, but from the way you giggle behind your hand, he figues it’s pathetic.

✄┈┈┈┈ january 01, 2025 – 12:13 pm.

The team was at their final set, a good 20 point lead. Honestly, you haven’t paid much attention to your brother, eyes glued on yushi, who, surprisingly, has played so well. Better than what you expected, atleast. I mean, really, what’s there to expect from a loser like him?

you bite your finger, currently yushi has the ball, running across the field as he aims for the goal. The opposing team's player that's running alongside him is positively three times yushi’s size. He bumps into the man, effectively making the player fall and roll over. You can’t help but feel anxious, will he even make that goal?

The whistle blows and the crowd cheers, he does make the goal.

And, well, he also gets punched in the face. Um..

“yushi!” You hear one of their teammates yell, running over to him and helping him to his feet. The amount of blood flowing out his nose is quite concerning. You look around the field for your brother. Oh.

Before you could even react to him charging at the player that punched Yushi, he’d already tackle him down and the referees are already separating them. He really needs to control his temper. sigh.

enough of that, you immediately jump on your feet the moment yushi was nearing the bleachers. “You fucking idiot” you exclaim, flicking yushi’s forehead, his teammates laughing. So much for controlling tempers. Guess it runs in the blood.

“couldn’t you have dodged that? What are you a football player for if your reflexes are slow!” You continue to scold him, his eyes turning the slightest bit watery before casting them down, deciding his shoes are far more interesting to look at.

Before you were able to continue your reprimanding, you felt a heavy arm sling around your shoulder, making you snap your head to the body next to yours. The sight of your brother’s face makes you gasp, instantly throwing his arm off of you.

“You-!” You half gasp and half shout, you hand smacking him behind his head, making the team laugh. “You fucking dumbass! Look at your face!” Your brother only shrugs, leaving you to walk over and sit at your chair, chugging his water in one go.

The commotion makes Yushi look over at you, cotton stuffed on both his nostrils. Poor boy, he looks like a wet kitten. Eyes glistening and a pout on his lips. How kissable.

What? What.

Weird observation.. anyways! Just as you were about to grab your bag, their coach clapped his hands together, announcing “celebratory lunch! You-” he gestures at you, “included!”

Sighing, there's really no escaping this one.

You plop down on your seat with a breath the moment their coach ushered the team back in the locker rooms. To which makes you groan frustratedly, because your brother takes way too long in the showers.

Luckily enough, the team owned ball was left on the seat next to yours. Bingo! You hop on your feet and run, throwing the ball on the field, giggling at the feeling of the grass touching your toes through your socks and slides.

How long has it been since you last played?

Running and kicking the ball around the field had you so occupied, you hadn't noticed a figure watching you.

“Um.. I didn't know you played..”

The sudden voice makes you yelp, almost tripping on the ball. You whip your whole body to see none other than Yushi, “what the hell, yushi!”

He squeaks, almost as if he expected you to have an explosive reaction. “Sorry..”

What a wimp. You roll your eyes and bend down to pick the ball up, before jogging back in front of him. “Where's your teammates, dork?”

Yushi juts his bottom lip out ever so slightly, eyes casting down once again, “finished first than them..” he murmurs.

“What?” You quip, “can't you speak any louder than that?”

Yushi huffs, cheeks puffed and glowing a hue of pink, “I said I finished first, so they're still inside” you stare at his face, the flush on him really makes him look adorable.

“Weirdo” your brain to mouth filter must've been upside down. Didn't you just say he was adorable?

Whatever. He didn't need to know what you thought.

Thinking yushi had nothing better to say (or do, other than stare at ball in your arms), you turn your back and run back to the field, completely shocking you when you turn to face the goal and he’s right there.

You click your tongue, “if you wanted to play with me, you could've just said so” admittedly, you found it endearing how he follows you around like a lost puppy. However he didn't have to know that “no need to creep up behind me”

“Actually..” yushi starts, fingers fiddling with one another, “why are you here?” you tilt your head, were you not allowed to be here?

You hum, “to watch my brother. Why” you smile, a remark already at the tip of your tongue, “did you think I was here for you?”

Yushi looks at you, the look in his eyes unreadable, “yeah”

huh? huh.

“What?” what? Yushi sputters at the look on your face, eye wise and mouth agape. “I– uh– uhm..” words, yushi!

You try your best to fix your expression, letting yushi explain himself, “uh huh?”

Yushi looked around to make sure no one was around. Huffing, he shuts his eyes tight and leans forward, pecking your lips. The soft feeling of his lips came as soon as it left. What the hell.

A beat, two, three. And you're bursting out in giggles, “what was that? You didn't even hold me at least!” yushi flushes a deep color of red from his cheeks, to his ears, down to his neck, his hands balled in a fist. He’s such a loser. So cute.

“I–” yushi yelps, head ducking down, “I thought you came to watch me” he whispers. It makes you laugh wholeheartedly, “so you kissed me?” Yushi whips his head up so fast it makes you worried for his neck, “no!”

“Then what is it, loser?” Yushi quirk your brow, his whole body flinching when you held his hand to drag you with him on the grass, sitting crisscrossed, “we’re not leaving here until you tell me”

yushi sits on his knees, hands balled on his lap, “I like you” he murmurs, “huh?” you tease, hearing him loud and clear from how close he’s sitting next to you. Yushi groans, an accusing finger pointed at you, “you heard me!”

He’s so endearing. “Okay, okay! Sorry!” You laugh, hand on his wrist, his skin steaming hot from embarrassment, “I heard you, loser”

yushi slumps on himself, “still loser?” there he goes again with wet kitten look, how could you possibly resist that? “Mhm,” you hum, dragging yushi down with you as you lay on the (dirty) grass. You turn to face him, slightly surprised that he’s already looking at you.

You smile, the kind that reaches your eyes, “my favourite loser” maybe coming to your brother’s game wasn’t so bad.

eek! yushi one shot with a new writing style, what do yew guys think? 😓 anyways riku smau update soon as a welcome back celebration yippee!

© bomiten 2025 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, translate, or share my work on other platforms. thank you.

[stllwiyuu]

⎯⎯ ⠀ ༘˚🧺⋆𖦹.🌷˚ ⠀ ⠀⠀ dreaming of you, baby.

[stllwiyuu]

⎯⎯ ⠀ ༘˚🧺⋆𖦹.🌷˚ ⠀ ⠀⠀ dreaming of you, baby.

[stllwiyuu]

last submission tomorrow, which means i can FINALLY go back to making moodboards 😭🙏

[stllwiyuu]

── ₍‧₊˚🖇️✩ ₊˚

[stllwiyuu]

✉︎ᯓᡣ𐭩 i love it, my designer.

[stllwiyuu]

🧸ྀི‎♡‧₊˚ ⎯⎯ 夜空に輝く想い 叶うかな

[stllwiyuu]

You Mattered

Word Count: 621 Summary: “You think nothing mattered? That’s not true.” She frowned slightly, meeting his gaze. “What do you mean?” Pairing: Taerae X Fem reader

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The room was quiet, save for the faint sound of music playing from Tae Rae’s guitar. She sat cross-legged on the floor, flipping through an old photo album from high school that he’d dug out of his closet. The pictures were filled with awkward grins, terrible hairstyles, and memories of a simpler time.

“Do you ever miss it?” she asked, pointing to a picture of their group of friends during a camping trip. Tae Rae, as usual, was grinning ear to ear, standing right next to her.

“Miss what? High school?” he asked, glancing at the photo and strumming his guitar absentmindedly.

“Yeah. You know, the carefree days, no adult responsibilities… before everything got complicated.”

He laughed softly. “I miss some parts. But I don’t think I’d survive another math class.”

She chuckled, closing the album and leaning back against the couch. “True. But… I guess I just miss how easy things were. Like, nothing really mattered back then.”

Tae Rae looked at her thoughtfully, his fingers stilling on the strings. “You think nothing mattered? That’s not true.”

She frowned slightly, meeting his gaze. “What do you mean?”

He set the guitar down and leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees. “There were a lot of things that mattered back then. Friendships, dreams, the people we cared about.” He paused, his voice dropping slightly. “You mattered.”

Her breath caught for a moment, and she laughed nervously, trying to lighten the mood. “Come on, Tae Rae. That was ages ago.”

“Doesn’t mean it wasn’t real,” he said quietly. His words hung in the air, and she felt the weight of them settle in her chest.

She avoided his gaze, suddenly feeling exposed. “What are you trying to say?”

He leaned back, a small smile playing on his lips. “You used to have feelings for me. Admit it.”

Her eyes snapped to his, heat rushing to her face. “What? I—no, I didn’t!”

Tae Rae raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. “You’re a terrible liar.”

“I’m not lying!” she protested, but her voice wavered, betraying her.

He tilted his head, his smile softening. “It’s okay, you know. You don’t have to deny it.”

She sighed, slumping against the couch. “Fine. Maybe I did. But it was a long time ago, Tae Rae. It doesn’t matter now.”

“Why not?” he asked, his tone so genuine it made her heart ache.

She hesitated, her fingers fidgeting with the hem of her shirt. “Because… it’s in the past. And nothing happened. And besides, you didn’t feel the same way, so—”

“Who said that?” he interrupted, his voice quiet but firm.

She froze, her eyes locked with his. He was serious, his usual playful demeanor nowhere to be found.

“What?” she whispered, barely able to get the word out.

“I never said I didn’t feel the same way,” he said, his gaze unwavering. “Maybe I didn’t know how to say it back then, but… you weren’t the only one with feelings.”

Her heart pounded in her chest as his words sank in. “Tae Rae…”

He leaned closer, his voice soft but filled with certainty. “I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you. And maybe it’s too late, but I didn’t want to keep it to myself anymore.”

She stared at him, her mind racing. All the what-ifs she had buried over the years suddenly came rushing to the surface.

“It’s not too late,” she said finally, her voice barely above a whisper.

Tae Rae smiled, the kind of smile that had always made her heart flutter. “Good. Because I don’t want to wonder about what could’ve been anymore.”

And just like that, the past didn’t feel so far away anymore. It felt like a second chance.