storybittensoul - Tumblr blog

[storybittensoul]

Yoooooo!!!!

[storybittensoul]

I cannot stand the parodies of modern major general, they're overdone and simply not as good as the original. They've done them about everything, whatever topic, big or small.

And when i notice one of them my eyes will always start to roll.

The diction's always slurry when they rush the complicated words, and adding many fricatives will turn it so cacophonous. The slanted rhymes are silly and they keep just making more and more, please someone stop the parodies of modern major general.

The scanning of the lyrics in the meter is unbearable, they emphazise the syllables in ways that are untenable, in short in matters musical, prosodic and ephemeral, i cannot stand the parodies of modern major general!

[storybittensoul]

instagram: smacmccreanor

[storybittensoul]

I kinda miss these

[storybittensoul]

Hey everyone! This is my lovely friend Cyrus Nemati, who many of you may know as Theseus, Dionysus and Ares from the first Hades game.

He has spent the last couple years developing his very first indie game, Vampire Therapist, which plays with the many vampire character archetypes from across media.

It's been reviewing VERY well but it's not getting very many wishlists, so if you're interested in vampires, fantastic art and clever, funny, and thoughtful writing about vampire mental health, go wishlist it on Steam!

And listen, Cyrus may be too humble to leverage his colorful career as your favourite Hades hotboys, so I'm gonna do it for him 😌 GO SUPPORT FANTASTIC INDIE DEVS LIKE THIS ONE!

[storybittensoul]

FINALLY a good answer to this!

since mrs, ms, and mr are all descended from the latin word magister, i propose the gender neutral version should be mg, short for "mage"

[storybittensoul]

So listen i have this book coming out in uhhh 10 days and I am Worried about it, because it is a Comedy, and comedy is really hard to market (why????? it's funny pirates, what's not to like??) even when it is, yanno, normal mainstream comedy.

It is even worse when it is Unhinged Comedy That's Mostly Going To Be Funny To People On Tumblr. (For example, the main character being a supreme gremlin made of 90% memes by weight (examples: carries around a bag that is never called anything but his "little rucksack"; has a near-verbatim "stick me legy out real far" moment; talks about his metaphorical "orphan gruel bowl" which is a direct reference to that one Oliver Twist gif) because those are funny to me personally.) Unhinged Tumblr Comedy is difficult because tumblr is not a platform where it is easy to market things to people, because we are generally violently anti-capitalist and LOATHE advertisements and reflexively resist being marketed to for most anything. I LOVE that about this website. Except for right now, because I have bills to pay and a cat to feed. So look, fellow tumblr gremlins, I am just trying to say that if your personal brand of comedy is laughing at the kind of jokes that could only be produced on this hell website, and:

you like pirates

you're queer and want to read more books by queer authors

you want your fictional queer characters to be a hell of a lot more Messy and Unhinged than they often are depicted as being

you're interested in seeing a love triangle (M/M/NB) that resolves into polyamory

you want books where the hottest character gets to makes Passionate Speeches about rebelling against oppressive institutional regimes like governments and organized religions

you believe that capitalism is the most oppressive institutional regime of them all

you think it's fun when two characters have been in a 15-year-long relationship where the vibes have been "We're Newly Divorced" nearly since day one

you believe that All Cops Are Bastards and want to know what to do when you get pulled over by the boat cops

you think the Great British Bake-Off would be improved with weaponry, ritualized bribery/coercion of judges, and elaborate shit-talk

then this book might be for you. Beneath the wall-to-wall hijinks, it is political and it is righteously angry and it is the funniest thing I have ever written (which is saying something, because I have written some funny shit). It's called RUNNING CLOSE TO THE WIND. Here's a picture of it.

If all that sounds cool, you can read a review of it here and the first chapter of it here to see if it as funny as I am claiming it is, and then if you think that it is, you can preorder it here. It comes out on June 11! Ten days from now!

Thank you for letting me market to you for a minute. Signal boosting would be very much appreciated.

[storybittensoul]

my partner doesn’t use pet names nearly as much as i do, which is very funny because i will crack my gay little knuckles and say some shit like “good morning my sun and moon, my loveliest boy, my baby my sweetheart my darling dearest” and he will reply “hello adrian”

[storybittensoul]

Common misconception! Dogs don't grow on trees, that would be silly. Dogwood trees grow dogwood tree seeds. The reason they're called "dogwood" is because their wood is perfect for the creation of a fresh dog! Humans have been crafting dogs from these trees for millennia.

i'm going crazy over all the pink dogwood trees in bloom right now

[storybittensoul]

The International Court of Justice told Israel to immediately halt its attack on Rafah. So Israel decided to bomb a UN tent camp.

We are witnessing beheaded children being pulled out of a a sea of burning tents. We are witnessing the bombing of displaced people in a humanitarian area.

I didn’t think we could see anything more brutal than the things we’ve seen in the last eight months. But tonight’s massacre in Rafah is unspeakable. There are truly no words left.

If you cannot stop the injustice, please, at least speak up about it.

[storybittensoul]

once again thinking about the solid snake panty lines tweet

[storybittensoul]

helen “trans people are perpetuating gender steriotypes” joyce is now upset that the scientific american is writing about how women were hunters too back in the day, not just mothers and caretakers. feminist win!

[storybittensoul]

via indiarosecrawford

Frog Paints a Water Lily Pond 🪷🎨🐸

𝑓ₒᵣ ⲕᵢ𝑛𝑔 ₐ𝑛𝑑 𝑐ₒ𝑡𝑡ₐ𝑔ₑ

[storybittensoul]

This is the End Goal of Capitalism

I have had strong visions of the need for a specifically geriatric care orientated fast response team for evictions,.

[storybittensoul]

Sorry, I could never be a capitalist, I suffer from “wanting humans to have their basic needs met” disorder, where I care about people who aren’t me.

[storybittensoul]

While cleaning out my room I found a paper that my therapist gave me some time ago to deal with obsessive and intrusive thoughts. Sorry the paper is a little crinkled and stained, but I figured I’d post it in hopes that it will help someone like it helped me.

[storybittensoul]

really obsessed