strawberry-crow

[strawberry-crow]

i wish dog owners would shut the fuck up sometimes

[strawberry-crow]

how busy are you guys that you can't spend a few days sorting beetles?

[strawberry-crow]

oilers lb ily here’s a card giveaway to help the pain

I usually do these for the pwhl but I figured after the series we just watched, my nhl pals need some fun card giveaways too. I looked through my cards instead of watching the third period with my full attention, and here’s what I have to offer as my giveaway!

Rules:

Reblog to enter (get an extra entry by putting in the tags how long you’ve been on oilers tumblr)

Open to canada and usa

drawing for a winner on June 22nd

Here’s a breakdown of the cards:

2023 Tim Hortons Duos - Rink Rivals - McDavid/Matthews

2023 Tim Hortons Duos - Rink Rivals - Draisaitl/Kadri

2024 Tim Hortons Rookie Retrospective - Take a Bow - Connor McDavid

2021 Upper Deck Series Two - Leon Draisaitl

2024 Tim Hortons Rookie Retrospective - Connor McDavid

2021 Tim Hortons - Photo Finish - Connor McDavid

2018 National Hockey Card Day - Connor McDavid

Bonus! (Not pictured) 2021 Parkhurst Base Card - Adam Henrique (as a mighty duck)

[strawberry-crow]

[strawberry-crow]

wait, isnt NSFW the letters on the compass

[strawberry-crow]

So since you’re obviously trying to be obtuse about Sabrina carpenter - people are mad because it’s misogynistic and anti-feminist. Have you even seen the album cover? She’s on her knees with some dude holding her by the hair. Since you’re being a little bitch about it I won’t start on the politics of why this matters even more right now. Get the fuck out of here you stupid Russian skank

I'm sorry everybody I know I'm supposed to do some kind of zinger in reply but this is genuinely so fucking funny

[strawberry-crow]

oh we can't turn back time? that's cool, I'll spend the rest of my life wishing I could though

[strawberry-crow]

gender-affirming surgery is a months-long dark comedy. what the fuck do you mean you're charging me double for everything. what do you mean they itemize the bill by left and right ball. what the fuck.

[strawberry-crow]

I have some news for members of the united states armed forces who feel like they are pawns in a political game and their assignments being unnecessary.

[strawberry-crow]

I saw a post going around a while ago (including from a non-US moot) about getting comfortable lying to law enforcement

Here's the thing. In the US.

DO NOT TALK TO LAW ENFORCEMENT IN THE FIRST PLACE.

If you are in a situation where you're lying to law enforcement, you are already interacting too much. STOP TALKING.

You can ask if you are free to go. You can keep asking.

Per the National Lawyers Guild, ESPECIALLY do not lie to the FBI. Do not say things to them that could be construed as lying. Those are serious charges. The best way around that is NOT TALKING.

In the words of the National Lawyers Guild: SHUT THE FUCK UP.

[strawberry-crow]

the concept of platonic marriage is so appealing ngl. you mean i can marry whoever i want, get tax benefits and a roommate AND i don't have to worry about them thinking i'm unattractive? king shit

[strawberry-crow]

i am sitting on the couch, i hear tapping on the door behind me, i turn around and see this

what do i do

[strawberry-crow]

"you don't get it, the usa is a fascist country full of government propaganda, and our rights as women and queer people are constantly attacked!! you have no idea what that's like!!" i'm hungarian 👍

[strawberry-crow]

I assure you: somebody, somewhere, is on the exact same wavelength as you are.

[strawberry-crow]

i’m starting a collection of things insane people do in animal crossing

[strawberry-crow]

[strawberry-crow]