streakystreakystreaky - Tumblr blog

[streakystreakystreaky]

notice: if you continue, several fetish scenarios will proceed in sequence.

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In my ideal society implying that a woman is too muscular would be considered such a severe faux pas that only ritualistic suicide could clear your honor

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Bro last night was like a YouTube Short

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everythi g is so shits -_-

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noncon friendship

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does anyone know what the first step of unlearning shame is. please say it’s substance abuse

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"im gonna kill myself" [remembers that suicide jokes scare my loved ones] "and im taking you with me!"

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driving my wild boar and i feel a slight bump and i look in the rearview mirror and see a squashed honda civic

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im pregnant and its nobodys. it aint even mine

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im pregnant and its nobodys. it aint even mine

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Me: yeah I've been eating nothing but buckshot for like six days is that gonna be a problem?

Nurse who runs the MRI machine: Duuude this is gonna be so cool

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Cartoon smartphone with devil horns and an evil grin: Well, well, well, look who's tipsy. Better use one of my rideshare apps, drunkie. Those taxi driver unions aren't gonna bust themselves! Ha ha!!

Cartoon beer can with little angel wings and a halo appearing above my shoulder as I start my car: Hi! I'm Roadie, the Road Beer! Wanna play a fun game? It's called "drink me all up before you drive past the elementary school"!

Muffled voice coming from my glove box: Uh oh, looks like we're getting pulled over! You're gonna be real glad I decided to come along!

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starting a collection

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REMEMEBER IF HARD WATER IS CAUSING CALCIUM BUILDUP IN YOUR BONG, JUST LET SOME WHITE VINEGAR SIT IN THAT THING FOR A FEW MINUTES AND SHE'LL BE LOOKIN BRAND NEW. JUST DONT SMOKE WEED WOTH THE VINEGAR INSIDE PLEASE

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