streetlight-alpacafesto - Tumblr blog

[streetlight-alpacafesto]

[streetlight-alpacafesto]

I haven’t had sex in 4 weeks

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mother of god

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today at work a toddler in a high chair patted me on the arm to get my attention, then when i crouched down and asked him what’s up, he pointed at the table full of chatty old ladies across the aisle and said “NOISE” and i have never in my life been more delighted by a guest complaint

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Every time I see a post about updog I’m torn between not wanting to fall for it and wanting to help the poster complete their joke.

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You’ve been hit by 🔪

You’ve been struck by 🔪

A Roman Senator 🔪🔪🔪

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You can’t uninstall edge from win10

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Results so far

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me: -puts any sort of blanket on my head-

brain: ah, my liddol russian lady. please get me some beets

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so like, not only did someone edit the mountain goats’ wikipedia page from the us house of representatives, but they edited it specifically to refer to the members of the mountain goats as “a band of nice boys who make the good, rocking tunes” and i think that is very important to remember this morning

(edit history of the ip used)

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Pokémon vs Pokémon GO

Pokémon: I caught this Pokémon very early in the game and it's very special to me and I named it something very meaningful

Pokémon GO: This is Guitar Solo and I caught him by a dumpster outside a Taco Bell

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Who even runs the Streetlight Twitter.

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rules: tag 20 follows you want to know better I was tagged by @jigsawvevo what’s the happy-haps my dude I just saw this my bad

name: henry nicknames: Hank, H-Bomb, heinrich, alpaca boy, The One-Eyed Pirate, space cadet, waste cadet gender: dude star sign: scorpio? height: 6.3 light-nanoseconds; roughly 0.7 stories; 2.4 times the average human step length; 6′2″ or 1.9 meters; 1.1 times the length of all the strands of DNA in the human genome. age: 19.6 (that was just a guess but I worked that shit out and it turned out almost exactly correct -> I’m 19.6054792-ish but I don’t know when the sig figs start being meaningless) hogwarts house: the one where everyone is gay. ravenclaw? fav color: once you have transcended you will abandon petty notions of favoritism time right now: like 6:15 pm average hours of sleep: between 2 and 14 lucky number: me. I’m number 1. last thing i googled: “what to do if raptors attack” favorite fictional character: God. hey everyone, I’m richard dawkins! blankets i sleep with: 0 fuck warmth favorite bands/artists: streetlight, fleet foxes, death grips, godspeed you black emperor dream trip: Amsterdam or Rome dream job: the prof you have who’s always 15 minutes late to lecture what i’m wearing right now: gray chinos and a gray T-shirt I’m so exciting when did i make this blog: five-halves years ago follower count: NaN posts: 15k what do i post abt: communism when did your blog reach its peak: just before I posted for the first time. it’s all downhill from there. why did i get a tumblr: a friend made me make one what do u get asked on a daily basis?: dude, do you have the money you owe me? I owe money all over town why did u choose ur URL: I wore a fuzzy sweatshirt to the union and a friend called me “alpaca boy” and I just sort of combined the alpaca thing with streetlight to make this bullshit

i tag: @jigsawvevo let the corecursion begin