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Vogue, January 1992

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deep conversation questions for relationships?

What does being close mean to you, and how do you show it in our relationship?

What big dreams do you have, and how do you see us fitting into each other's futures?

What does trust mean to you, and what things help us trust each other?

Tell me about a time in your past that really shaped who you are now.

How do we deal with arguments or fights, and how can we talk better when things are hard?

What ways do you like to feel loved, and how can we make sure we show love in the ways we each like?

How do we respect each other's personal space and rules in our relationship?

Do you think we can grow and change while we're together, and how can we help each other get better?

How can we make both of our needs important in our relationship, even if they're different?

How can we be a couple but still keep our own selves and interests?

What things worry you about us, and how can we make those worries better together?

Tell me about a time when you felt really understood and supported by me. What made it nice?

What's your thinking about forgiving each other, and how do we get through tough times?

Why is talking openly and truthfully important to us, and how can we make a space where both of us feel okay to share?

How do we figure out what's important for us together and make choices we both like?

What things do you think make a good relationship last?

Can you tell me about a time when you felt proud of us? What made it special?

How can you keep friends and connections while being in a relationship with me?

What do you think about making memories and experiences as a couple?

If you could change something about how we talk or act together, what would it be, and how can we do better?

It's really important to be sure that the person you're in a relationship with thinks about things the same way you do. When your thoughts and beliefs match, it helps you understand each other better and get along well. This makes it easier to handle problems and make choices together because you're on the same page. Your goals, your work ethic, your problem solving skills.

Growth mindset, resilience, emotional intelligence, self awareness, how they forgive, the outlook they have on life, their level of responsibility, how they handle tough times, how they communicate, take care of themselves, their views. How they solve problems, their level of independence, how they communicate, how they support you. All of these things are important because relationships are about the potential of building a life together and independently. You can not overlook these things just because you love someone because you can not force a relationship to work.

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When you start lifting weights and working out, everything else tends to fall into place. Your body begins to crave healthier food and hydration. Your body tends to sleep better at night to recover. Your mind becomes clearer. And you have less desire to engage old bad habits. —India Ame’ye